Urges women to use Al-Bakistan number plates while driving in an emergency
Lahore: Following the overwhelming success of Al-Bakistan number plates, Inshallah stamps were launched in the country on Sunday. Singer turned religious cleric turned joke Junaid Jamshed inaugurated the stamps in a star studded event.
“We expect Pakistan to become an Arab colony by 2020,” Jamshed said during the press conference at the launch of the Inshallah stamps. Jamshed, whose esteemed opinion on women has driven them to lesbianism, looked extremely happy as he showed the new stamps to the journalists.
“I mean Al-Bakistan number plates were a huge success. From cars to truck drivers to the young youthias of Imran khan, who want a Naya Bakistan, everyone is working – Mashallah – towards the Islamization of Pakistan. We at J. will stamp each receipt with this brand new Inshallah stamp and encourage all traders and shop vendors to use these stamps,” Jamshed said.
He continued: “I have already signed a billion rupee deal with private schools. I will be delivering lectures all across the country and teaching the importance of these stamps to young kids and teachers. I’ll be the stamp ambassador.”
Jamshed urged all teachers to sign their students’ homework diary and stamp it with Inshallah. He said that young kids need to learn the importance of this beautiful word rather than being taught nonsense like E=mc2 and evolution.
“It’s hilarious, can you believe it! They are brainwashing the young momineens of the Ummah with these scientific idiocies,” Jamshed said angrily.
Jamshed, who had previously opposed the idea of woman drivers in the country, said that due to extreme pressure by Zionist-funded feminist organisations, and after talking to Hamza Ali Abbasi, he believed it was okay for a woman to drive a car during an emergency.
“They should drive cautiously and use the Al-Bakistan number plates,” JJ advised.
“I have also written a letter to Pepsi Cola to change the name to BEBSI Cola. I love Pepsi and whenever I drink that awesome beverage, it makes me nostalgic. I used to be the poster boy for Pepsi cola,” JJ said proudly, adding that, “But now I just drink and reminisce. I drink a lot of Pepsi. I’d rather have them change the name to BE-BASI cola.”
JJ concluded the press conference by describing a tableeghi fetish.
“It’s true that once you join Tableeghi Jamat you have this crazy fetish for Pepsi. You become so helpless over time – Subhan Allah – you start calling it Be-Basi,” Jamshed said before raising his hands up for dua.