i was on the phone with my mom tonight, sharing (rapturously) about my time at the sauna today. she knows, and heard again this evening, just how powerful and impactful and refreshing my weekly sauna time has become.
one of the absolute highlights of my week, i told her. every time i leave, i feel energized and nourished in ways i couldn’t have expected.
she then commented that it’s been years since she has “pampered” herself as i do weekly at the sauna.
her comment was honest, holding no criticism, and it allowed me to think more deeply through this paradigm that we so often hold as women, and mothers …
that, somehow, taking care of ourselves is “pampering” – something superfluous and unnecessary and reserved only for the select few.
my world has been rocked and one of the ways that i am forever changed is this: taking specific steps, defining real things that are absolutely both physically and mentally healing to me and making those things happen in my life – that is no longer an “extra.”
it is the way of healing.
there are many other parts of my life that are pieces of my healing puzzle, nourishing and energizing my mind and body, and one thing i know for sure: i have zero guilt making sure that they happen in the midst of my very busy and full life.
a very real gift of cancer, as cliche as it sounds, that i absolutely evaluate all that fills the space of my days … does it reflect who i am, what i believe, where i am going? does it fill my life with that which breathes life and healing?
i am still learning and definitely don’t have this all figured out. i still struggle and feel torn and pulled in the directions that call my deepest attention: mothering, being a wife, managing our family’s home and schedule and meals and rhythm.
but i no longer have any question deep within about the value & need for me to do certain things – i must. and it’s not just ok ... it’s good.
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