2016-07-19

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At The Good Men Project we’ve been zooming past some really huge milestones.

We celebrated our sixth anniversary last month by putting some finishing touches on an all new site design that’s cleaner, easier to read, and mobile friendly. While we’re still working out a few bugs we’re thrilled with the enthusiastic response. We’ve passed 300,000 comments (thanks to you) and this morning we published our 50,000th article. For more milestones, celebrations, and challenges read that article—Welcome to the 21st Century: A New Modern Look for The Good Men Project, A New Era of Change, by our CEO and Publisher, Lisa Hickey.

Really though, it’s the milestones we can’t track—the ones most people don’t see—that mean the most to us. It’s the 5,500 plus contributors and editors who have put their hearts and words into those 50,000 posts. It’s the 3 MILLION plus readers who have written to us or to our authors to tell us we’ve helped to change their perspective, their mind, their life. Or maybe they’ve written to tell us just how full of it they think we are, but still, they’re reading and they’re thinking and that is what a conversation is all about.

While we could never agree on our “best” articles—because there are so many that are personally meaningful to each of us—we picked out 10 of our Top Hits from the 5 topics we talk about the most.

Enjoy, share, comment, do what you’ve been doing with us for 6 years. We love you for it!

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Men and Relationships (And Love, and Sex) – Our Top 10 Picks

31 Reasons Why Men Don’t Cheat – The Editors

“Here’s a shocker. I love my wife enormously. I worry about her daily. My love for her as a whole human being is greater than my sexual needs.”

Five Important Things Women Don’t Know About Men – Noah Brand

It’s true, men are complicated and confusing. Noah Brand clears up five common misconceptions.

7 Things Men Want In A Relationship – Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray says that there are seven simple things that basically all men crave in an intimate relationship.

The 5 Most Important Things That Make A Man Feel Loved – Jed Diamond Ph.D

Jed Diamond, Ph.D on how to make a man feel vulnerable without making him feel unmanly.

My Dear Son, This is How to Treat a Woman – Alex Lim

A father offers advice on what to do, and not to do, to find and happily marry the right woman.

Today I Walk Away – Phil Tytanic

Sometimes leaving is a kindness — for both of you.

How to Court a Good Man: What to Do—and What Not to Do – Thomas G. Fiffer

A reader said there were no good guides to courting a good man. So Thomas Fiffer wrote one.

7 Ways to Make Your Partner Feel Appreciated: The Obvious and Not so Obvious. – Steven Lake

Steven Lake reminds of us of the ways we can appreciate our partner, even when the world conspires to make us lose sight of what we have.

The Real Reason Marriages Fail – Nathan Timmel

After reading a rant about why marriage doesn’t work anymore, this man summed it up in one sentence.

How to Stay in Love — Jackson Bliss

Both a lyrical essay and a love poem, Jackson Bliss writes this tender and fiercely beautiful piece about the love of his life.

Fathers and Boys (We Are Helping to Create 21st Century Fatherhood) – Our Top 10 Picks

I Have a Dream: That People Will View a Picture Like This and Not Think It’s a Big Deal – Doyin Richards

The only thing Doyin Richards wanted to do was get his daughter ready for school. He had no idea the viral outrage that would cause.

What Was The Most Profound Change In 75 Years? A Son Asks His Father. – Ken Goldstein

Ken Goldstein and his father discuss all the changes of the past 75 years to get at the one that mattered most.

The Healthy Sex Talk: Teaching Kids Consent, Ages 1-21 – The Editors

A list of parenting action items, created in the hope that we can raise a generation of children who have less rape and sexual assault in their lives.

15 Things All Dads of Daughters Should Know – Justin Ricklefs

Justin Ricklefs has four daughters and, over the years, he’s put together this list of fifteen things that fathers need to know about their daughters.

How a Dad Took a Good Look at His Son’s Bad Day, and Ended Up in Awe – Sean O’Donnell

His son Chris had a bad day, but as a dad, Sean was willing to cut some slack. More than that, he was filled with a profound respect. Here’s why.

How Raising Emotionally Literate Boys Challenges Our Perceptions of Masculinity – Heather Gray

Heather Gray challenges us to think about what our sons really need in order to be emotionally literate.

4 Promises From a Christian Pastor Dad if His Children Turn Out to be Gay – John Pavlovitz

A Christian Pastor, and father of two, has thought long and hard about the possibility that a child of his might turn out to be gay. Here are his four promises if that happens.

An Open Letter to My Son About Sex – Janis Whitlock

“Your greatest challenge will be to honor the erotic feelings and desires that will come up inside you while also staying fully present and respectful.”

Please Sir, Can I Read Some More? -Kalimah Priforce

When Kalimah Priforce was eight years old and in foster care, he got more books the only way he could. He went on a hunger strike.

To the Other Dad on the Playground the Day My Son Wore a Pink Dress – Gavin Lodge

This dad was apprehensive when his young son wanted to wear a pink dress to the playground. Another dad’s reaction impressed him with the need to write about it. Here is the letter, dad to dad.

Talking About Masculinity (Because That is What We Do) – Our Top 10 Picks

Let Him Play With Dolls – Rebecca Cohen

Gender isn’t going anywhere, Rebecca Cohen writes, but that doesn’t mean we should keep forcing it on boys and men.

The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer – Mark Greene

Mark Greene explores how in American culture, men avoid all contact rather than risk even the hint of causing unwanted sexual touch.

Five Things Every Self-Respecting Man Over 30 Needs. And 40 He Doesn’t. – Thomas Pluck

Thomas Pluck believes the things a man really needs are all-encompassing and don’t even require money.

5 Things I Wish My Father Had Told Me About Men – Dixie Gillaspie

Her Daddy didn’t tell her, so she learned the hard way. Men are people too, and most of them are good.

Intimacy and the Myth of the Self Made Man – Sean Swaby

Is male intimacy limited to the bro-hug and “how you doin?” Whatever it is, it scares the crap out of us.

The Man Box: The Link Between Emotional Suppression and Male Violence – Mark Greene

Mark Greene explores the Man Box, and how it leads to policing of behavior that dares to fall outside the boundaries of traditional masculinity.

The Danger in Demonizing Male Sexuality – Alyssa Royse

Alyssa Royse explains how our current predator/prey model of sexual relationships is harmful to both men and women.

Why Date a Man Who Dances? – The Naive Idealist

A man who dances is no ordinary man.

There is No Such Thing as a Real Man – Jeffrey Platts

“Real man” definitions perpetuate cookie-cutter masculinity because an “evolved” mold is still a mold. It doesn’t matter if you fit in the man box, you are still a man.

4 Subtle Clues That Reveal a Man’s Character – Kent Sanders

How you speak to people reveals who you really are.

Social Change (How a Quest for Justice and Equality Changes Our Culture )– Our Top 10 Picks

The Luxury of Invisible Privilege – Jackie Summers

Jackie Summers examines the way racism reproduces – and how well-meaning people feed the disease by denying their privilege.

7 Things I Want to Say About Something I Don’t Have the Words For – Lisa Hickey

Lisa Hickey views the #NiceAttack through the eyes of a terrorist attack survivor. And looks for a path forward together with others at The Good Men Project.

Confronting Life – Aaron Gouveia

Aaron Gouveia and his wife were already having the worst day of their lives. Then they encountered the abortion protesters.

‘Why I Don’t Want to Talk About Race’ – Steve Locke

Tom Matlack asked his friend Steve Locke to write for us about race. He declined. Here’s why.

White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard to Talk to White People About Racism – Dr. Robin DiAngelo

Dr. Robin DiAngelo explains why white people implode when talking about race.

Ten Tips On Talking To Your Kids About Sexual Assault and Rape – Michael Kasdan

The Good Men Project editors and contributors share their best advice.

To The Woman And Child Who Sat At Table Nine – Tony Posnanski

“I was supposed to politely tell you to please not have your daughter yell. I was supposed to offend you by not offending you…”

Yes, I Get Why You are Voting for Trump. Here’s What It Will Cost You in the End. – Rob Watson

She went into a speech about how Trump was a no-nonsense, tell it like it is, straight shooter. My camel’s back was starting to give way as I sat in silence. “And he is a BRILLIANT business man!”   There it went. Here’s what happened next.

The Patterns In Mass Shootings and a Conversation About Men – Lisa Hickey

A look at the patterns in the 71 mass shootings over the last 32 years and how they intersect with the social pressures of masculinity.

The Tyranny of the Sex/Gender/Sexuality Binary – Warren Blumenfeld

The natural world has never conformed to our human notions of “two sides” to everything.

Men’s Stories (We Started With Stories About Men. They Are Still the Foundation of What We Do) – Our Top 10 Picks

I’m a Gay Man Who Married a Straight Woman – Tim Rymel

When religion makes a promise reality can’t keep.

Depression Is an Ongoing Battle I Fight Every Day – Dyllon Charron

Depression is an invincible foe. But Dyllon Charron found a way to fight it: by becoming invincible himself.

In the Dark – Ted Stachulski

The frightening world of sports, concussions and traumatic brain injury.

A Thank You to the Love that Got Away – James Woodruff

The one that got away is the most important person you’ll meet in your life.

Can A Broken Man Overcome His Greatest Fear – Shawn Henfling

I battle a disease that has no physical ailment, no test and no proven cure.

My Addiction Doesn’t Define Me – Patrick Sallee

Patrick Sallee’s road to sobriety was long and winding, but he’s a better man for traveling it.

I Knew I Met the Girl I’m Going to Marry When I Found Pictures of Her with Her Ex – Jonathan Church

A peek inside a past relationship can be a wake up call.

No One Ever Taught Me How to Be a Man – Bryan Reeves

Until I neared my 40th birthday, I never realized what not having healthy masculine role models was costing me and the women I loved.

The Dirty Little Secret Behind Statistics About Men – The Editors

Scott is a man who represents many widely quoted studies and surveys, but there’s one he would never have shown up on, until now.

13 Rules for Being Alone and Being Happy About It – Tyler Tervooren

There’s nothing wrong with you when you don’t feel like going to parties, or being the center of attention. Because being alone isn’t abnormal, it’s needed.

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Did you pick out some favorites? We’re all ears. Let us know which articles have meant the most to you and why. That’s what the comments section is for (and you might find your comment featured as a Comment of the Day.) Plus, you just might start a conversation.

Did you know that you can support our mission and be more engaged in our conversation for as little as $5 a year?

That’s the little-bitty investment for a Bronze level membership in our Premium Community. Join in the weekly Conversations with the Publisher, meet other members in our Private Facebook Community, let others know you’re one of us with the Commenting Badge and your name on our Friends Page—and NOW, as we celebrate our multiple milestones, you also get a digital copy of Select Voices from the Conversation No One Else is Having. Usually that book is reserved for Gold Members, but it isn’t every year we meet so many milestones. So for a limited time you can join at the Bronze Level and get access to this Gold Level benefit.

Join like-minded individuals in The Good Men Project Community.



Photo: Getty Images

The post 50 Top Hits from The Good Men Project’s First 50,000 Articles appeared first on The Good Men Project.

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