I had to learn how to get over an ex. Don’t we all? Just because all of us are faced with break ups at some point that doesn’t make it any easier. But what if there was an easy way? What if you knew how to get over an ex fast AND get hotter and cooler in the process?
A PERSONAL STORY
I’ll never forget the day that I found out my boyfriend cheated on me. I got off of work early and went to his house to surprise him and there she was. She was pretty. She had long blonde hair held back into a ponytail with a spray tan on her slender figure in yoga pants and flip flops. “I was always so bad about keeping up with spray tans and my nails. Maybe I should have been better.” She was younger than I was, but not by much. We had pulled into his driveway at the exact same time and at first I wasn’t sure who she was. “Is she at the right house?” Is that his sister’s friend? Why is she just sitting there without getting out of the car?” She turned to look up and face me slowly. Her big blue eyes were wide and her body was stiff. I didn’t know her, but she knew me. Don’t they always know you? She probably knew everything about me down to the most intimate details of my life, while I didn’t even know she existed. I felt so violated in every way. Time stopped and my world shattered as I realized I was looking into the eyes of the “Other Woman.”
I felt numb at first, but then reality started to settle in. My heart fell into my stomach and I stopped breathing. “I’m not ready to lose him.” I was happy. I loved him. He was my world. A part of me wished I could go back to not knowing and just carry on as we were before. The bigger part of me knew I was better than that. I just lost my best friend, my home, and a huge part of my identity. The person I thought I was going to marry was now a stranger. I felt so violated. Betrayed. Was any of it real? “Did he ever love me?”
I replayed every insecurity I’ve ever had over and over again in my head. I wanted answers. I wanted him to hurt like I was hurting. I wanted him to tell me that losing me was the biggest mistake he had ever made and beg for my forgiveness.
I told him to never talk to me again, but prayed he’d call me every day. “Why did I want his love and acceptance more than ever???”
I spent weeks at my parents in bed and didn’t want to get out of it. I couldn’t eat. I slept with my phone in my hand just in case he called. He didn’t. “I wish I could ignore him the way he can ignore me.” I wanted so badly to jump out of my body, but I was stuck. Stuck with my thoughts. Stuck with my pain. Stuck with myself. I knew this depressed person wasn’t me. But who was I? I decided to explore and do whatever it took figure that out. I wanted to get hotter and happier than I’ve ever been and fall head over heels in love with the person I am meant to spend the rest of my life with. (All of which I did.) I made the decision to become the best version of myself. I knew I was better than what I was doing.
And so are you.
Do you want more for yourself?
THE SECRET
You can get over a break up fast. Anyone can, but not everyone does. In fact, MOST don’t. Time heals all wounds and everyone follows their own path to their happy ending, but if there was a way to get to your happy ending quicker than every other path wouldn’t you want to pick that one?
Had I known this secret a long time ago I would have gotten to where I wanted to be mentally, physically and emotionally much quicker. Like most people, I took the long road. I did everything I was “supposed” to do. I focused on the positive, spent time with family and friends, and tried new things. I got in better shape, built up a successful 6 figure career, and got a new boyfriend. (And another one and another one.) My ex even begged me back like I had always wanted. Turns out I didn’t REALLY want that. “Why do we wish for things we want instead of what we need?” Time does heal. It’s true what they say. (Who is “they” by the way?) Things really DO happen for a reason. I found happiness, but I still didn’t feel fulfilled.
It wasn’t until a conversation I had with my friend Dan that I finally found the quickest path to fulfillment. I discovered the secret to not only healing any type of pain, but also finding the best version of yourself.
Dan had been traveling solo through South America for the past 6 months. His stories were amazing and he did things that most of us can only dream about. He seemed so happy, centered, and fulfilled. Everything I wanted to be. Here I am in Brazil on my wimpy one week of vacation for the whole year while his entire life was one big holiday. I looked at Dan, smiling in amazement, and said, “I wish I could do that.”
His response was simple, but it had such a big impact on me. He replied, “Why can’t you?”
When you want to make the most out of your life, you need to detach from your life all together. Go where no one knows you and you can be anyone. Take yourself outside of your comfort zone. How can anyone make any change if they drown themselves in the same? The same people, environment, same routine and thoughts? Of course it is possible, but no wonder it takes so long for people to move on from pain. Go where the experience gives you something you couldn’t have expected, because it is outside the realms of what you know exist. There are things you can do and places you can go that will show you parts of who you are that you’ve never met. You may not figure out the meaning of life, but you might figure out the meaning of yours.
Meaningful Travel. That’s the secret.
WHY THIS SECRET WILL WORK FOR YOU
If your trust has been violated in some way in a relationship, your feelings are hurt. You’re confused how someone could do that to you, because you came from a place of love.
People who give out pain expect pain and people who give out love expect love and that’s normally how the world works. You are lucky you feel pain because that means you feel love too. You have a heart and a soul with emotion. Your heart and soul are alive. Because you’re here alive you are going to endure its beauty and its pain. You need the painful parts in order to feel the happy parts. You need the contrast.
Pain doesn’t last forever and the only thing permanent is death. The world always finds balance so if you are in pain, then you have so much good coming to you in the future to balance it out. So keep your eyes open. Be looking for the positive out there. The love. Know it’s coming. If you have your eyes closed to those opportunities you’ll miss them. So pack your bags and be ready for happiness to fill your heart. If you want to maximize what you get out of your trip, go alone.
You Will:
Eliminate anxiety, drama and stress
Master Meditation
Look good naked
Get Killer Social Skills
Become a more interesting person
Gain life long friends (or a life long special someone)
Connect with people on a deeper level who understand and love you for who you are
Build confidence and get rid of insecurities
Grow the Capacity for love in your life
Gain a deeper understanding of who you are and who you want to become
Find your gifts and your talents
Fall in love with yourself, the world and everyone in it!
When you don’t HAVE to do anything, you really see who you are.
Wish you could?
Why can’t you?
• Kids? Leave them with family short term and come back a better parent long term. “Can’t” do that? Fine. Take them with you. You’ll bond in ways that you never have before and they’ll grow into better little people too. They’ll learn things at an early age that most never do.
• No Money? There are life changing trips that last 30 days for less than $1,000.
• Have a job? If you love it then your boss loves you too and doesn’t want to lose you. (And you know it!!!!) Be firm that you need a leave of absence and your boss will negotiate with you. You’ll come back and be even more productive and successful than before. Don’t love your job? Quit. Having long term travel experience on a resume gets you a big gold star at cool companies with cool bosses when you come back. Trust me. I went through it.
• Caring for someone that’s sick? This one is my favorite. You need to go more than anyone! For 2 reasons:
o You need a break!!! We can’t help others unless we are taking care of yourself first.
o Take them with you. There are amazing, beautiful, magical places that heal all those that come for as low as $750 a month all inclusive. You can drop them off, take some time to yourself, and when you pick them up they’re better than when you left them! If you want to stay by their side, then be their roommate! You’ll leave better than you came too.
Imagine what your life would be like if you changed “I wish I could” to “I will.”
We can’t do everything, but we can do anything.
Travel. Love. Happiness.
Go. Quit telling yourself that you can’t. Transform yourself into the best possible place mentally, physically and emotionally that you can and go home the best version of yourself. (If you go home.)
Four months after my conversation with Dan I quit my job in the middle of a recession while others were losing theirs, sold everything I owned and bought a one way ticket. I traveled through 27 countries on 6 continents by myself. I felt free and it was liberating.I felt more happy and alive than I had ever been. I learned exactly who I am and loved myself for it, but the best part about my entire journey happened after I got home.
While I was traveling I let go of the past, lived in the present, and knew what I wanted in my future.
I completely started over and crafted my life based on what I learned traveling. I hand picked a new city, career, and group of friends based on where I knew I belonged more than anywhere in the world. I was the ME I have always wanted to be.
And then just 3 months after getting home to the United States I met David. That was the best day of my life. It has been 3 years and he still gives me butterflies. I didn’t believe soulmates existed until I met him and now I understand the term, “better half.” Everything that happened was supposed to happen exactly like it did because it led me to him.
“Mi Vida.”
I whisper those words in his ear every morning before I get out of bed. They mean “My Life.”
I want EVERY single person in the world to find what I have found and to feel what I feel. There is nothing like being over the moon in love. I spent weeks on this blog post because I wanted to communicate this message so it really gets through to those who need it. I want you to find life altering love. I want you to find the best possible you so that you can find the best possible person to spend your life with.
Finding an experience abroad or at home is the quickest way to get you there! I want to help you feel what I feel. I want you to feel what I have watched other people feel when they have been through a meaningful travel experience. I want to share with you all the life changing experiences there are and how to get started. If you would like me to send you my top 6 meaningful travel ideas for transformational change, sign up for my newsletter below and I will happily send it to you once it is ready! Thank you so much for taking the time to read my message to you. I’m very grateful.
Wishing you all the LOVE you can handle,
~ Courtney
Credit: Courtney R @ www.grassfedgypsy.com
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