2016-09-02

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Revision as of 16:25, 2 September 2016

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[[File:PlagueTower.jpg|
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|thumb|Yes. It is as stupid as it looks.]]

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[[File:PlagueTower.jpg|
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left
|thumb|Yes. It is as stupid as it looks
.]]

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[[File:Nurgle_Plague_Towers_Modern_Art.PNG|550px|right|thumb|Even with a modern up-to-date rendition. It still look like ass
.]]

The Plague Tower of [[Nurgle]] is a [[Daemon Engine]] from the Days of [[Epic]]... bet that already started the bells ringing, huh? It is a serious contender for the title of [[Derp|"Absolute ''Stupidest'' Chaos War Machine Of All",]] and considering some of the other Daemon Engines, that's saying something. It would have been taken more seriously if it was not for the two stupid looking faces stack on top of each other [[/d/|re-enacting some kind of bizarre vomit porn.]]

The Plague Tower of [[Nurgle]] is a [[Daemon Engine]] from the Days of [[Epic]]... bet that already started the bells ringing, huh? It is a serious contender for the title of [[Derp|"Absolute ''Stupidest'' Chaos War Machine Of All",]] and considering some of the other Daemon Engines, that's saying something. It would have been taken more seriously if it was not for the two stupid looking faces stack on top of each other [[/d/|re-enacting some kind of bizarre vomit porn.]]

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Even with a more modern alliteration (See pic on the right), the Plague Tower still looks stupid. I mean by Nurgle's sake you would think that they would do away with the idiotic [[derp]] faces with something more disgusting like the [[Plaguereaper]], but nooooo...they just have to give the new Plague Towers the faces of [[herp|surprised emojis...]][[Bullshit|fucking bullshit!]] The stupidity and impracticality of this Daemon Engine is further compounded on how ECKS BAWKS HUEG it is. Seriously it is as tall as a [[Warhound Scout Titan]] for crying out loud! A blind Guardsmen in command with a [[Shadowsword]] has more chance in hitting the damned thing than he is walking up a stack of stairs without a walking stick.

As the title suggests, it is, at heart, a glorified siege tower. Yes, the big towers on wheels that besieging forces would push forward to try and act as a ramp into the castle in medieval times. The sort of thing that even [[Orks|Feral Orks]] consider kind of primitive. Like its fellow Nurglite Engine, the [[Contagion]], the Plague Tower is mostly made of rotting wood and rusting metal, held together more by Nurglite magic than anything. Unlike a primitive siege tower, though, it mounts two demolisher cannons, a "Pus Cannon" that spews diseased, corrosive slime at anything close by, and a disease-vomiting Plague Mortar on its top. The whole ramshackle contraption is also infested with [[Nurgling]]s, which rally to defend it against invaders. It additionally has a giant bell on top whose main function is to ring the sound of the Plague Lord, but in all honesty this contraption looks like weapons being piled up with more weapons, making it both impractical and vulnerable to the center of gravity as any slight breeze can knock that tower down.

As the title suggests, it is, at heart, a glorified siege tower. Yes, the big towers on wheels that besieging forces would push forward to try and act as a ramp into the castle in medieval times. The sort of thing that even [[Orks|Feral Orks]] consider kind of primitive. Like its fellow Nurglite Engine, the [[Contagion]], the Plague Tower is mostly made of rotting wood and rusting metal, held together more by Nurglite magic than anything. Unlike a primitive siege tower, though, it mounts two demolisher cannons, a "Pus Cannon" that spews diseased, corrosive slime at anything close by, and a disease-vomiting Plague Mortar on its top. The whole ramshackle contraption is also infested with [[Nurgling]]s, which rally to defend it against invaders. It additionally has a giant bell on top whose main function is to ring the sound of the Plague Lord, but in all honesty this contraption looks like weapons being piled up with more weapons, making it both impractical and vulnerable to the center of gravity as any slight breeze can knock that tower down.

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