2016-08-15

Monday Night Raw

Date: August 15, 2016

Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas

Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s Summerslam week and Brock Lesnar is here. On top of that things should be back to normal with the full roster back after their Australia/New Zealand tour last week. We should get one last push on all of the big matches, including Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor for the first ever Universal Title. Let’s get to it.

Last week on Raw, Roman Reigns sent Lana into a cake and Seth Rollins didn’t think much of Finn Balor.

Earlier today Rollins was outside waiting for his opponent Finn Balor, or the Demon King. He calls him out for a fight right then and there but no one showed up. Tonight he’ll find Balor instead.

Lana and Rusev are in the ring with Lana saying they’re not leaving the ring until everyone hears what they have to say. There will be no Raw until Reigns comes out here and apologizes. Instead he gets Mick Foley, now in a Have A Nice Raw shirt and with a beard that has its own zip code. Rusev yells a lot and says Foley sucks as a GM. He asks for Stephanie McMahon to come out here instead so here’s the bigger boss to stick up for Foley.

Rusev threatens to call Vince or Shane but here’s Roman to interrupt as well. They insult each other a bit and a USA chant starts up. Rusev wants to defend Lana’s honor so Mick makes the match tonight, albeit not for the title.

Sheamus vs. Sami Zayn

Before the match, Sheamus gets some promo time saying Sami is nothing to him because Sami talks a lot on Twitter but he’s just a Sheamus knockoff. Sami throws his shirt at Sheamus and they’re quickly brawling before the bell. Cesaro sits in on commentary as Sami forearms Sheamus in the corner. A headscissors only ticks Sheamus off and he sends Sami back first into the post as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus in control and hitting a powerslam for two on Sami. Cesaro talks about having an offer to go to Smackdown, which a talent like himself deserves. The ten forearms to the chest have Sami in trouble but he knocks Cesaro outside for the big flip dive.

Corey gets on Cesaro for talking about himself a lot and Cesaro brushes him off in a rather heelish manner. White Noise gets two for Sheamus and a Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same. Sheamus comes back with the Irish Curse but here’s Cesaro for a distraction, setting up the Helluva Kick for the pin on Sheamus at 10:14.

Result: Sami Zayn b. Sheamus – Helluva Kick (10:14)

Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens say tonight’s match between Owens and Big Cass isn’t one on one because Jericho will have Kevin’s back. Jericho wants to know who certified Enzo as a G. Does he even have a license to be a G? They’re ready for their tag match at Summerslam too and tell Todd/Robert/Brian/Nathaniel so, despite the interviewer being named Tom.

Post break Cesaro and Sheamus are brawling again when Foley comes in to break it up. Mick loves seeing them fight so we’re getting a best of seven series.

Dudley Boyz vs. New Day

Non-title and there’s no Big E. at ringside. Before the match, Gallows and Anderson pop up on screen to say they’re trying to cure Ringpostitis. They’re doing everything they can to make sure their results aren’t tainted, including putting eggs in microwaves. They’re well endowed with the right equipment and the ball is in their court. The distraction lets D-Von take over on Woods to start but D-Von clotheslines Bubba by mistake. Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise on D-Von for the pin at 1:38.

Result: New Day b. Dudley Boyz – Trouble in Paradise to D-Von (1:38)

Post match the doctors’ experiment was a failure and they need more test subjects. Kofi wants to know why these two think this is a game. Summerslam is their anniversary of being champions and there’s no way Anderson and Gallows are getting their hands on New Day’s rocks.

Rollins is still looking for Balor but no one has seen him. This includes Neville, who says Rollins isn’t ready for the Demon King. Seth yells a lot.

Nia Jax vs. Rachel Weaby

Rachel has blue hair, bright green and pink attire and a lot of tattoos. She’s been watching the Olympics and is ready to bring home the gold. Nia throws her around and knocks her off the top with a single shot to the face. Rachel is out cold but Nia brings her back in for the fireman’s carry into a powerslam for the pin at 1:05.

Result: Nia Jax b. Rachel Weaby – Fireman’s carry into a powerslam (1:05)

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar for their big talk before Summerslam. We see Orton and Lesnar trading sneak attacks in recent weeks. Heyman starts his catchphrase….and here’s Heath Slater to interrupt. Paul hopes that someone put Heath up to this because it’s really stupid.

All Heyman can do is laugh as Slater talks about Raw understanding what Smackdown can’t get. Apparently if Slater fights Lesnar tonight, he gets a job. Heyman just ignores him and goes into his promo about Orton but Slater cuts them off again. Heath knows he’s going to get hurt very badly but he has to do this for his kids. Brock actually talks because he can respect Slater fighting for his family. He actually wants to talk about Slater’s kids….who he doesn’t give a censored about.

Slater can walk out of here on his own two feet or stand here and keep ticking Brock off. Heath actually tries to fight and gets suplexed half to death, followed by the F5. Heyman puts on Heath’s sunglasses and praises his courage before laughing at the idea of Orton being a viper. It’s his job to hype up the match on Sunday but Lesnar won’t believe a word Brock says about Orton being a real threat. Brock is the box office at Summerslam and you should buy it to see a once in a lifetime athlete. Heyman wraps it up by saying Brock is dominant over and over.

Big Cass vs. Kevin Owens

Before the match, Enzo talks about cooking zucchinis, sausage, burgers, frankfurters and those two pieces of Canadian bacon. Cass shoulders Owens down to start but Kevin knocks him off the apron and into the post as we take a break. Back with Cass breaking up the Cannonball with a boot to the face but getting sent outside again. Owens can’t hit the apron powerbomb and gets backdropped, only to have Jericho jump Cass for the DQ at 6:23.

Result: Big Cass b. Enzo Amore via DQ when Chris Jericho interfered (6:23)

Enzo and Cass get beaten down post match.

Reigns is ready to fight no matter what Rusev has ready for him. Rusev jumps him from behind and sends Reigns into a steel wall.

Prime Time Players vs. Shining Stars

The Players were feuding just a week ago but earlier tonight Titus apologized so they’re back together for a third run. Darren and Epico get things going before it’s quickly off to Titus for a slam. Primo comes in and dropkicks Titus in the knee to take over, only to have Titus splash him in the corner. We get Titus suplexing Darren onto Primo for two but Bob Backlund accidentally distracts Titus, who is knocked off the apron by Darren. The Clash of the Titus plants Young and Primo gets the pin at 2:42.

Result: Shining Stars b. Prime Time Players – Primo pinned Young after a Clash of the Titus from O’Neil (2:42)

Jinder Mahal vs. Neville

Neville dropkicks him outside and hits a corkscrew moonsault to the floor. The Red Arrow doesn’t work yet and Mahal kicks him in the face for two. A chinlock goes nowhere and Neville kicks him in the head to set up the Red Arrow for the pin at 2:57.

Result: Neville b. Jinder Mahal – Red Arrow (2:57)

Jinder Mahal vs. Neville

Neville dropkicks him outside and hits a corkscrew moonsault to the floor. The Red Arrow doesn’t work yet and Mahal kicks him in the face for two. A chinlock goes nowhere and Neville kicks him in the head to set up the Red Arrow for the pin at 2:57.

Result: Neville b. Jinder Mahal – Red Arrow (2:57)

The bosses casually mention that Jon Stewart will be at Summerslam when Rollins comes in to find the Demon King. Mick suggests that he try it in the ring.

Here’s Rollins to call out Balor and give him one more chance to show himself tonight. No one shows up so Rollins laughs it off and calls this match just another chapter in his book. He’s the face of Balor’s failure but something we can’t see (maybe a fan jumping the barricade) cuts Seth off. Seth keeps laughing and the lights start flickering and go out. Red lights flash and here’s Demon Balor for the first time in WWE.

Rollins has no idea what to think of this and Balor, now with writing all over the right side of his body, gets in his face. The fight is on and Balor cleans house as he should in this case. Balor misses the Coup de Grace but hits a flip dive over the top to take Rollins down.

We look back at Lana being sent into the cake last week.

Golden Truth vs. Gallows and Anderson

Gallows and Anderson are in their doctors’ coats. Truth gets kicked in the face to start but gets in the spinning forearm for a breather. It’s a double tag to Goldust and Anderson with Goldust hitting his bulldog and powerslam. Not that it matters as the Magic Killer ends Goldust at 2:18.

Result: Gallows and Anderson b. Golden Truth – Magic Killer to Goldust (2:18)

New Day comes in for the beatdown post match and it’s Gallows saving Anderson from a trombone to the testicles.

Charlotte talks down to Dana Brooke about wanting a taste of the spotlight. Dana failed her when it mattered the most but Charlotte will win the title anyway. Charlotte leaves Dana in tears.

Alicia Fox vs. Charlotte

Sasha Banks is on commentary. Fox hits some dropkicks to start but gets pulled off the middle rope for two. Natural Selection ends Fox at 1:25.

Result: Charlotte b. Alicia Fox – Natural Selection (1:25)

Charlotte calls Sasha to the ring but Dana takes out Sasha’s knee, setting up the Figure Eight.

Video on Braun Strowman.

Roman Reigns vs. Rusev

Non-title. Roman goes right at him before the bell and kicks Rusev in the face. The apron boot makes it even worse for Rusev but he posts Reigns as we go to a break. We’re joined in progress with Rusev working on Reigns’ bad left arm. Reigns gets choked on the ropes but comes back with a Samoan Drop for a breather. They head outside with Reigns being sent into the steps a few times but Rusev has the US Title taken away from him as we take another break.

Back with Rusev grabbing the mic and saying we’re all Russian wannabes. Rusev chokes Roman with his own ring gear, which isn’t a DQ for reasons that aren’t clear. Roman fights out and knocks Rusev off the top to set up a clothesline to put both guys down. The Superman Punch is countered and Rusev gets two off the spinwheel kick. Four straight middle rope headbutts get four straight near falls for Rusev.

The fifth finally misses and Reigns starts fighting back until a shot to the ribs slows him down. Rusev’s superkick is countered with a Superman Punch for a good near fall. The spear is countered with a few kicks to the head for two more but the Accolade is broken up as well. Another superkick to the back sets up the Accolade until Reigns basically collapses into the ropes. Back up and the spear pins Rusev at 20:39.

Result: Roman Reigns b. Rusev – Spear (20:39)

Results

Sami Zayn b. Sheamus – Brogue Kick

New Day b. Dudley Boyz – Trouble in Paradise to D-Von

Nia Jax b. Rachel Weaby – Fireman’s carry into a powerslam

Big Cass b. Kevin Owens via DQ when Chris Jericho interfered

Shining Stars b. Prime Time Players – Primo pinned Young after a Clash of the Titus from O’Neil

Neville b. Jinder Mahal – Red Arrow

Gallows and Anderson b. Goldust Truth – Magic Killer to Goldust

Charlotte b. Alicia Fox – Natural Selection

Roman Reigns b. Rusev – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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