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Part One: Understand your Depression
Recognize that you have a problem. The first step of getting out a depression is recognizing that you are depressed. There's a difference between having a rough day and experiencing a prolonged and overwhelming period of depression. Here are some signs that you are struggling with depression[1]:
If you feel a major decrease in your energy level and are always tired no matter what you do.
If you feel guilty, worthless, or helpless without knowing why.
If you feel hopeless and pessimistic about most, if not all, aspects of your life.
If you no longer enjoy doing the things you used to love, such as hanging out with friends, pursuing your hobbies, or having sex.
If there has been a dramatic change in your sleeping habits, such as insomnia, early- morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping.
If there has been a dramatic change in your eating or drinking habits, such as a complete loss of appetite or excessive alcohol use.
If you feel like things just won't get better no matter what you do.
If you prefer to be alone at all times than to interact with others.
If you have had thoughts of suicide. If you are thinking suicidal thoughts, skip to Part Three and get help immediately.
Try to find the cause of your depression. It's time to do some soul-searching to see if your depression is something that has been plaguing you for as long as you can remember, or if there was a particular event that triggered it. Understanding the reasons behind your depression---as much as you can---can help you begin to address your problem.
See if your depression is situational. If you've generally been a happy person but have been in a rut because of a long and painful breakup, the death of a loved one, or the fact that you moved to a new city where you don't have any friends, then it's likely that your depression is something you can address head on.
If have been feeling depressed for a substantial amount of time but can't think of a particular reason. Note if you have been suffering from the symptoms of depression for months, or if you have had waves of depression for your whole life.
Remember that the causes of depression can be biological or genetic---it may not be caused by a specific event or change in your life.
Figure out what you want to change about your life. Whether you've pinpointed the reason for your depression or just generally need to make improvements in your life, something needs to change. Write down everything that makes you unhappy and see what you can do about it. Here are some common things that may need to change:
For many people, this means their surroundings. Are you feeling stifled in a small town? Move.
Are you still working at the company that gives you no sense of meaning? Quit.
Are you still in a relationship that is making you feel manipulated? Break up.
Are you unhappy because you're overweight? Make a diet and exercise plan.
Part Two: Improve Your Condition
Develop meaningful relationships. Feeling completely alone is a big part of feeling depressed, and if you work to foster important relationships, you will feel less alone, needed, and more fulfilled. Here's how to do it:
Show your close friends how much you care. Your close friends may have the best of sense of who you are, so make a point of seeing them, talking to them, or just emailing them often to tell them how special they are. Force yourself to make a date to see your friends as many times as week as you can--this will make you to get out of the house and will make you feel more involved in the world.
Stay in touch with your family. If you have a loving relationship with your family members, try to see them on holidays, to send them birthday cards, and to be involved in the lives of your family members. If your relationship is strained, try to make things better by having an honest conversation about why it happened.
Make new friends. Never underestimate the ability of an acquaintance to become your best friend. If you've been friendly with your neighbor or the new girl in your art class, ask him or her to have a coffee date.
Cut off harmful relationships. In some unfortunate cases, your relationships with a family member, friend, or significant other may actually be fueling your depression--and could even be its main cause. If you find yourself in a relationship that not only brings you no pleasure but lowers your self-esteem and makes you feel worse about the world, it may be time to say goodbye.
Pursue new interests. Having new hobbies can help break your routine and give you something to look forward to, and are just plain fun. Pursuing a new interest will also help fill up your time and will have you focus on something other than your depression. Here are some things to try:
Find your artistic side. Try taking a class in pottery, watercolor painting, or ceramics. You can learn a new skill and make some artistically-minded friends.
Find a new favorite artist. If your new favorite crooner is contemporary, check out concerts in your area and invite your friends.
Find a useful skill. Learn how to fix furniture or mend clothes. You'll save money, feel good about yourself, and may be able to help a friend in the process.
If you really love to read, make a goal of reading a certain number of books in a month. Just watch out for isolating yourself further. Join a book club, talk to your friend about a book, or take your book out in the middle of a sunny park.
Increase your self-worth by being generous. If you're feeling useless or worthless, find a way to volunteer in your community or to give some of your time to those in need. Not only will you be helping others, but you'll become a more generous person and will feel better about yourself in the process. Here's how to do it:
Help children and adults read at your local library.
Volunteer in a homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or another organization for people in need.
Join one of your local park clean-up or gardening clubs to help improve the way your community looks.
Help people you know accomplish tasks, whether it's teaching your little brother algebra, or helping your friend plan her birthday party.
Force yourself to get out of the house. Many people remain depressed simply because they lack the will to go out. It certainly can be difficult to push yourself when you're feeling down, but it is an effort well worth making. Here are some tips:
If you don't feel up to socializing as such but feel the need for company, get out of the house and do whatever it is you were going to do at home. For example, rather than staying home and doing a crossword, take it to library and do it there in the company of other people. Exchanging a few pleasantries with the librarian might make a difference to your day.
When you don't want to do anything is when you need to the most. If you're feeling particularly unhappy, go for a walk to get some fresh air and to get your blood flowing.
Get some sun! Being out in good weather is proven to improve your mood.
Eat healthy and exercise. If you haven't been eating healthy foods or exercising regularly, your self-worth and happiness may have already suffered. Making an improvement in your diet and exercise plan can work wonders on your mind. Here's how to do it:
Take up running---outside. Provided the weather is reasonably warm, running outside in the sunlight is one of the easiest quick fixes for your mood.
Try another form of exercise, such as going to the gym to lift weights, doing yoga, or taking salsa classes. Not only will this get you out of the house, but you may make some friends in the process.
Eat three balanced and healthy meals a day. Skipping meals can make you irritable and cranky.
Avoid foods that are known to affect your mood, such as coffee, alcohol, and foods that are high in sugar. Instead, eat foods like omega-3 fatty acids, which can be found in fatty fish like salmon or mackerel, or Vitamin B, which are known to make you happier. [2]
Part Three: Get Help if Your Condition Does not Improve
Know when to ask for help. If you've tried all of these tactics and nothing is working, or if your condition is so severe that you're having trouble trying to follow these steps, it's time to recognize that you can't tackle the problem on your own and need help from others.
Talk to a friend or family member. Talking to someone who knows you best can make you feel less alone, and you may feel better just from talking about your struggle--you don't have to face it alone.
Look online for help. Find reputable sites on the Internet that can provide you with tips for dealing with your depression, or connect with other people who are suffering from the same condition.
Many studies prove that talk therapy helps with depression. To get the most out of talk therapy, you need to find a therapist that you like and trust, and work with him or her over a longer period of time. It doesn't have to be years, but don't expect that serious depression will evaporate without some consistent work on your part. Cost doesn't have to be a barrier: most cities have reduced-fee clinics and many universities offer help through their psychology training programs.
If talk therapy doesn't do the trick, see a doctor to see whether you should take medication or address a vitamin deficiency.
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Edit Tips
Try to find the happiness in small things.
Wake up earlier or later. Your problem might just be the way you're managing your day. Waking up earlier might make you feel more productive and clear. Waking up later may make you feel freer and more alive. Figure out which one you need and adjust your alarm.
Get a pet. Having someone alive depend on you can make you feel needed and valuable. It also provides you with someone to love, which, though not a surrogate, can do a lot for you if loneliness or rejection is the cause of your depression.
In some women, depression may be caused (or worsened) by low hormone levels, most commonly progesterone. Progesterone helps keep serontonin levels from dropping too low, and low serotonin can cause depression. Doctors can test for low progesterone and prescribe it (though many doctors are unaware of the link with depression); it is even available without prescription.
Don't take yourself too seriously. Learn to poke fun at yourself.
Remember, life is short! Make the best of it! Take a stroll down the park, go to local events, meet new people.
Bear in mind that depression is commonly a symptom of a medical condition, such as mineral deficiencies (magnesium deficiency is quite common), hypothyroidism/hyperthyroidism, vitamin deficiencies and more.
Edit Warnings
If you're having suicidal thoughts, see a doctor immediately.
Let a doctor decide if your depression is clinical and requires medication. Taking medication is a big step, and evaluate your situation careful before you jump into it.
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