Jona Bryndis, Guest
Waking Times
If we are thinking, dreaming or hoping to find our True Love, ‘Soul Mate’ or TwinSoul, or if we believe that we found our ‘perfect’ relationship, we may be in for an ego surprise…. Relationships can be based on True Love or on Ego (see article ‘Understanding True Love’); on higher or lower consciousness level; on Freedom or on Karma; on purpose or on pragmatism, but perfect relationships don’t exist.
Sorry to say this so directly, but to think in this way shows our ego’s need for specialness and security. What we want to see as ‘perfect’ we idealize as the ‘one and only’, ‘made in heaven’, ‘eternal’ ‘forever lasting’ relationship. If we are honest with ourselves we will have to realize that our desire for finality or ‘foreverness’ is nothing but our ego’s delusion of security.
Relationships are the result of our inner work and inner happiness and not the cause. To improve our chances for a happy and long lasting relationship, we need to improve our inner realtionship first. Let’s have a look at what some of these aspects are that are holding us back from a truel love relationship with ourselves:
The Specialness of our Desire for a Perfect Relationship
Energetically seen ‘forever’ is an ego trap showing our desperate attempt to overcome our fear of death and infantile wish for a shortcut to eternal happiness. (Dreaming of winning the lottery is a very similar energy – but how many of you actually buy a ticket?). So, as a result our ego makes our relationship special, and tries to bind our partner with everything we have, so that reality can meet our ego’s need for security – but is this True Love?
Projecting specialness onto our relationship can cause a very dangerous form of energetic entrapment for both, if we allow it. It can bind people’s soul aspects, block their energy fields and cause havoc in people’s life without them knowing why. Clearing those energetic binds and ties, such as eternity vows, etc. often takes an awful lot of work (see Karmic Relationship Clearings).
Unfortunately, this idealization and illusion of perfectionism sells extremely well. Huge parts of our economy depend on our narcissistic desire for the perfect relationship and promote this way of thinking. Newest movements in spiritualism and esoterism are further firing up this dangerous tendency with love spells, false information and further externalization through ideas of the sudden arrival of a savior or Twin Soul in our lives.
Almost daily I receive questions about soul mates and twin souls; new books and online programs, such as ‘How to find your soul-mate’, ‘How to identify your twin soul’, etc. honestly do nothing but create a big confusion in people. Please don’t get me wrong, if you browsed a little through the transCODES site you know that we offer TwinSoul Reunification energy sessions and that I wrote many articles and reports about this subject, but the view I have to offer is a bit more critical.
Changing our View of Relationships
The problem I see arising, especially as we increase our energetic perception, is that we begin to feel energy exchange between others and us more consciously. If we are not aware of our inner energy flow and our hidden aspects, such as sexual shadow, ego-attachments, karmic aspects or inner child mechanisms, we can easily mistake our energetic experiences with others as something ‘special’. Our ego mind interprets our inner energetic response as something mystical and kidnaps our thoughts into fantasyland making the encounter at the grocery store a ‘sign’ that we may have met the perfect relationship partner or our Twin Soul.
In reality, experiences like this simply reflect on the exchange of information between two people and if there is a resonance on a certain level, we will feel this as deeper experience. However, this resonance may simply be that both sexual shadows or karmic issues are compatible. In other words, an energetic resonance doesn’t always mean that there is ‘something special or mystical’ – on the contrary, the more aware and connected with our True Self we become the easier we can identify our inner ‘shit-magnets’ and our according resonances with others.
On an energetic level, our search for ‘Mr./Mrs. Right’ and our views on relationships in our life are nothing but a major distraction from learning to love ourselves unconditionally. These mental and emotional views are therefore the underlying aspect that needs to be addressed.
There is no such thing as the ‘perfect relationship partner’.
This doesn’t mean that there aren’t any relationships based on true love, it simply means that a relationship is not an externalized object that happens to us one day! Relationships need to be developed and worked on – but not by trying to change the partner but changing ourselves!
Our relationships are the reflection of our inner feelings and alignments and definitely not the end of our journey. They will reflect our energetic state of consciousness and level of transcendence no matter how much we want them to be special. If we learn to transcend our ego’s desire for importance and eternal life, we will soon find out, that every relationship is ‘perfect’ – perfect for the state that we are in, so that we can grow out of our limitations and hidden inner aspects.
Sometimes this means that the current relationship is not congruent with our inner development anymore – sometimes it means that both partners developed in different directions – and sometimes it simply means that we need to work on our ourselves to enhance our existing relationship.
What is a True Love Relationship?
A True Love relationship is based on both partners allowing this inner development of both and their relationship with another to happen. Yes, this means work! And it’s challenging because it forces us to let go of all our safety programs, ego-illusions, our imbalances, incongruences and most importantly – our control patterns!
In a True Love relationship there is no need for inferiority or superiority – there is no need for doing something to ‘keep’ the other – and there is no space for control or manipulation. This is the reason why we need to be clear and strong within ourselves first; why we need to love ourselves unconditionally and be whole within, so that we are open to resonate with others, who are also aligned to True Love.
What is a Twin Soul Relationship?
Being aligned to the resonance of True Love within and the kind of relationship that can develop out of this resonance then becomes our key to opening up our Twin Soul field. Twin Souls are not to be confused with soul-mates. Soul-Mates are mutual karmic partners to help us heal our karmic patterns. Twin Souls are the total reflection of our True Selves and provide a higher purpose for the evolution of our consciousness. A Twin Soul resonates with us on a truth level even more challenging than a True Love. Twin Soul relationships leave nothing hidden, abandoned or denied. Do you think you are ready for this kind of relationship?
TwinSoul work, the process of self-transformation and evolution of our vibratory rate also has nothing to do with becoming perfect. This journey isn’t about becoming perfect – it’s about improving, enhancing, unfolding, expanding and creating – it doesn’t end here, it begins here!
Are we ready for a True Love relationship?
If we are not willing to let go of our last ego illusions, for example the search for ‘eternal foreverness’ or the idea of a perfect relationship, a relationship and life based on truth, inner love and heart-connection isn’t for us! We will simply not be congruent enough; we will lack maturity and strength to stand in a frequency free of patterns and programs, expectations, manipulations and control; and we will continually gravitate out of our heart-field and back into disharmony and pain. This is why we all have homework to do.
If we are still struggling with letting go our mental and emotional programs, our defensive reactivity and ego/shadow-based perception, we are not ready for a True Love or TwinSoul relationship either. Instead we will continue making compromises or allowing our inner integrity to be violated; we will still pretend everything is okay when it’s not; we will spend more energy trying to maintain the way things are than allowing growth; and we will probably continue to struggle with our inner connection and balance of masculinity & femininity.
There is no judgment in these statements. It our right to choose, but we cannot feed our illusion of the perfect relationship within us if we are not able to be truly in love ourselves. Being on this journey comes with a price – TRUTH.
Looking one way and walking another can be a very painful path!
You know that we you ready, when the pain of staying where we are at is worse than the pain of changing.
You are ready, when you aren’t afraid of facing and transcending your limitations; when you found your path to your heart and Inner Divine; when you know how to become one with your heart and learned how to surrender our thoughts and emotions to GRACE/Divine/Source/your inner higher power.
You are ready for a True Love relationship when you can feel True Love inside and know what it feels like to be truly connected with yourselves.
This process never ends, but we will have learned to overcome our fears of the unknown, go by trial and error and embrace experimenting, making mistakes and making corrections until we find the way for ourselves to be True to who we really are – until we find a way to love ourselves unconditionally and we can see this in the other too.
True Love and Twin Soul Work
I am often asked what it is that we can do to specifically prepare for a True Love/Twin Soul relationship. If you are willing to do True Love and Twin Soul work, here some tips as to what matters for this kind of resonance:
In order to be prepared for a True Love Relationship or Twin Soul Re-Unification we really need to have an understanding of True, unconditional Love within us first. For this understanding we need to be able to discern relationship patterns, inner masculine & feminine energies and inner programs (including our inner child and past & karmic patterns). We need to be absolutely clear that we understand, that the role of the other is not to make us feel whole or complete but to reflect us.
We need to know that it’s our responsibility to become whole within, and to acknowledge and honor our inner Divinity. This then prepares the way for our partner to recognize Divinity within us (and vice versa) – and the great gift of mutual and synergetic growth.
We also need to be able to stand our ground, whether in low or high frequency fields (TWIN SOUL energy within itself is a very high frequency field and instantly removes energetic dissonances by showing them.) Being with our Twin Soul means to able to allow being in this field without constantly getting fried by our expectations, romanticism, thought patterns, role models and other mental/emotional programs (push-pull).
We need to have a feeling for what it feels like to be true to ourselves, congruent and connected, without bashing or making ourselves, others or our relationship special. We need to know our True Self and understand the purpose of our eternal existence as a Soul with a body, so that we feel no need for separation pains.
And lastly, we need to be willing to accept the gift of growth. TwinSoul energy is the unconditional mirror of True Love – the gift of reflection, harmony and the evenflow of energy exchange and creation.
Conclusion
This all may sound like a lot, but don’t mistake this having to be at a ‘certain level’ to do this work – it’s the dedication it takes to get there that qualifies us for a True Love/Twin Soul relationship.
True Love and Twin Soul work is not based on a romantic idea; on the contrary, it shatters it and motivates us to go into a deeper level of self-work, self-understanding, self-responsibility, which can only resonate with truth and inner congruence.
The planetary evolution of consciousness is causing our overall energy field to speed up – high vibratory fields are becoming stronger and the collective more permeable. Allow this momentum to carry you into the next vibratory level of your journey – trust in your heart and your True Self and the beauty of your soul. Sooner or later you will find yourself surrounded by humans, circumstances and a relationship with the same resonance.
Now is the time to determine the course of your relationships – with yourself and everyone else!
About the Author
Jona Bryndis is an energy coach and remote energy worker. She is founder of transCODES, a virtual platform bringing people from all over the world interested in spiritual and practical self-transformation work together in her forum. She and her growing team of transCOACHES facilitate regular remote energy transMISSIONS and monthly free Remote Prayers, as well as published a series of Energy Mediation CD/MP3 processes allowing for deeper inner work of the individual. To learn more about her work and transCODES, check out www.transcodeshop.com or follow transcodes on facebook. Please visit her excellent website, TransCodes, where this article was originally featured.
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