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By Phil Hecken, with Daniel Secord
After a one week delay, today we announce the winner of the “Design An Ambulance” contest. There were, unfortunately, not as many entrants as past contests — perhaps due to the esoteric nature of the design — but I want to thank all those who did participate, and today we’ll reveal all the entries/winner. I’ll show all the entrants below, with a writeup (if any) and then Dan will announce the winner and have a few words.
OK, here we go (you can click on any image below to enlarge):
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Kinda’ rough…. but you get the idea!
I must insist that the Lion-Bulance would have turf and mini uprights oh the roof!!! Enjoy.
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I would like to present the Officially Licensed National Football League Breast Cancer Awareness Military Appreciation 50th Anniversary Tailgate Ambulance™ for the Detroit Lions, brought to you by Ford Motor Company and Papa John’s (Better Ingredients, Better Pizza™).
This is the essential tailgate ambulance, complete with official Bridgestone tailgate tires that meet the National Football League’s cleat regulations and provide a smoother, safer ride for the cache of Pepsi and Frito-Lay products stored inside the spacious Munchy Suites™ (Presented by Marriot). It also provides free wifi, brought to you by Verizon Wireless, so you can stay in touch with social media on your Microsoft Surface™ and challenge other Lions fans on Madden 16™ (Presented by XBOX and DraftKings) all from the comfort of Ford Field’s parking lot.
You will also notice the custom Nike bumper, delivered by FedEx, which is aerodynamic and allows you that edge every tailgater needs to drive longer and faster while being lighter and more fuel efficient. The custom horn blasts “Tailgate Food Tastes So Good” to the tune of Nationwide’s delightful theme while you wash down McDonalds with an ice cold Anheuser-Busch or Gatorade product, brought to you by Visa.
A percentage* of profits from each Tailgate Ambulance™ sold goes to the NFL Player Care Foundation after administration fees are taken into account.
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Suggested nickname: Literal Hell on Wheels
I lived in Michigan (River Rouge – just outside of Detroit) for 14 years so I know of what I write below.
Upgrade #1 – Couch to sit on top of the ambulance during tailgates and soak in the party. Also will be fun to set on fire after the game when the Lions get their asses beat
Upgrade # 2 – On the driver door is a replica of the memorial patch for William Clay Ford. Since the Lions are ignoring the one year rule for RIP patches, why should we?
Upgrade #3 – The giant 0-16 reminder of the dumpster fire which was the 2008 season. Done in SuperBowl Roman numerals to keep it classy
Upgrade # 4 – a bunch of Lion logos from the past and present
Upgrade # 5 – Dig the ultra cool Lions hubcaps with vintage logos! Use blue rubber for the tires to keep the somber spirit alive with how the ineptitude of the franchise keeps Detroit fans somber and blue.
Upgrade # 6 – Have motor city legend and self-proclaimed white trash extraordinaire Kid Rock pilot this rig around town!
Stay classy, Motown!
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Hey Phil, here is my entry for the Ambulance Design Contest. I only designed the front of the ambulance. It is based on the 1960’s Detroit Lions logo, with the stripes extending to the top of the ambulance. Also, some red lights have been swapped out for blue lights instead. This would probably fall into the decal portion (part I) of the contest I guess. My name for the ambulance is “Blue
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I’ve taken the ambulance and adorned it with the Super Bowl trophies won by the team.
I’ve attached the resulting images.
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Well, I don’t think Dan will like the graphics I have picked out, but bear with me. The Lions are loved in London because of the Lion logo and the “Three Lions” of the English Futbol Crest. So I have to at least suggest somewhere on the ambulance a tribute to the Brits in the form of one of the attached image files.
I have another plan that involves the Lions and London, but I doubt Dan will like that much either; we sell the Lions to London, everybody knows the NFL wants a team there and then some guy who makes pizza buys the Raiders and moves them to Grand Rapids. Detroit has had 50 years to prove to us they can’t even get close to a Super Bowl. It worked for Clevleand/Baltimore…it might be worth a shot. They’re killing us here! As much as I admire the diehard fans like Dan, something has to give. Maybe it will be our new offensive coordinator which brings me to the point…the name for the ambulance; I am suggesting (and this could be in very small print so it’s easy to cover up when the new coordinator gets fired) that the ambulance be named “The Cooter Skooter” in honor of the new offensive coordinator Jim Bob Cooter aka James Robert Vagina!
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I wanted to submit my 4-side design for Dan’s Ambulance named “The Pulse of the Parking Lot” (he wanted a pun!) As you’ll see in the images, the design is heavily inspired by the Lions’ uniform striping and from there most of the elements can be “decal-ized” (like Matt Stafford and Megatron peering through the rear windows).
Hope you enjoy, it was a lot of fun!
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And there you have it — that’s all the participants. Can you pick a winner?
OK, now I’ll turn the remainder of this section over to Dan, who’ll give his thoughts and announce the best entry:
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I want to start out by thanking everyone for there submissions. Designing an ambulance I’m sure was no easy task.
Now with a Lions design it is only to be expected that you get a lot of “clever” people. My absolute favorite of these was Kenny Ocker’s design. His write up simply said “I’ve taken the ambulance and adorned it with the Super Bowl trophies won by the team” The resulting images are of the blank ambulance. The same blank ambulance images I used as a template for the design. Pretty funny stuff Kenny!
Another one of my favorite clever designs was submitted by Roger Goodell under the alias of Bert Ayers. Bert had a write up about his design that was about a mile long. It included every Buzzword the NFL has in its repertoire. Sample: “I would like to present the Officially Licensed National Football League Breast Cancer Awareness Military Appreciation 50th Anniversary Tailgate Ambulance™ for the Detroit Lions, brought to you by Ford Motor Company and Papa John’s (Better Ingredients, Better Pizza™).” and there was about 3 more paragraphs of the same! I love the snark of that idea.
The design I am picking as the winner was Laura DeLuca. She did a really good job of keeping the designs original to the NNCC. Laura added a” NNCC since 2010″ decal on the doors which makes for a nice personal touch. She also hinted at the hospital that I work at on the playing field side of the ambulance with the initials “WSMC” which I thought was a cool little Easter egg. She also came up with a good punny name for the ambulance “Pulse of the Parking Lot.” Great name, although my favorite name that was submitted by a reader (AlMaFi) who came up with the name Yam-bulance, paying homage to the fact the Lions play every thanksgiving.
All in all it was a great contest and I want to thank everyone again for there participation. I really did enjoy parts of each persons design, but a winner had to be picked.
I will send images of the finished ambulance when the time comes.
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Thanks, Dan. And thanks again to all those who participated!
adidas introduces new “Iced Out” black & white unis
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Yesterday, adidas introduced their latest gimmick, which they’re calling “Iced Out” (a play on “icy white” helmets???) for Arizona State University, Indiana University, Texas A&M, University of Kansas, University of Louisville, University of Miami, University of Nebraska, and UCLA. It’ll be the only time we use the term “Iced Out” on here (other than for snippets of their press release below). The white unis (well, those without sleeves) aren’t actually that bad. But the gimmick is… well, here’s how they’re described:
When hit with a camera flash, the Iced Out uniform’s reflective finish illuminates for a bold look that will have teams showing out when the season tips off this month.
The monochrome black and white uniforms feature a diamond pattern inspired by basketball nets along the sides of the jersey and shorts. Enlarged team logos are displayed on the shorts and the warm-ups include a new short-sleeved hoodie finished with the same reflective fabric and basketball net print.
In the splash photos, you’ll see there are six teams featured: UCLA, Kansas and Indiana in white (certainly, what you’d call more of the “traditional” schools and certainly hoops powerhouses over the years) and three in black: Arizona State, Louisville (with sleeves) and Miami. Louisville was, I believe, one of if not the first school to introduced sleeved unis. Of course, these are all BFBS.
Also receiving sleeves (and BFBS) is Texas A&M and Nebraska (white) For all images below, you can click to enlarge:
Louisville also got a sleeved white set.
The standard boilerplate bullshit describes the uniforms thusly:
To give players optimum performance on the court, the uniforms feature the same lightweight, sweat-wicking technology used in the NBA. Targeted ventilation zones on the chest, back and side keep players cool even in the most intense moments of the game. A mid-hole mesh on the short maximizes comfort and breathability as the game heats up.
Teams will wear Iced Out uniforms for select games throughout the season including start of season tournaments.
So the newest innovation is the reflective crap on the uniforms designed to stand out when a camera flash hits them? (Sorta like how the logos on those aTm helmets were supposed to light up during the Hallowe’en game, only the game was played during the daytime, mitigating its effectiveness.) Are you kidding me? Now folks are designing uniforms so crap on them will “pop” in the lights of the camera? Really. It’s come to this.
You can see more of the unis by clicking here and by viewing the slideshow below:
Putting aside the “reflective” gimmickry (and BFBS, and sleeves — a tall order, yes), I actually like these unis — they’re simple and minimalist. Of course, they’re also entirely unnecessary, but hey — there’s more merch to sell now.
Classic Ballpark Scoreboards
I’m pleased to continue with a favorite weekend feature here at Uni Watch, “Classic Ballpark Scoreboards,” which are created by Gary Chanko. You probably know Gary best for his wonderful colorizations, but he has been a solid contributor for many years, and this is his new project. This segment will appear every Saturday on Uni Watch.
Here’s Gary (click on image to enlarge):
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Classic Ballpark Scoreboards – Series II
by Gary Chanko
For this edition, Classic Football Scoreboards returns to the Big Ten for a look back at one of college football’s iconic stadiums on the campus of T-h-e Ohio State University.
Football Home of: Ohio State University (1922 – present)
Opened: October 7, 1922
It is known as The Horseshoe or Shoe for short. The original horseshoe-shaped Ohio Stadium was conceived and designed by OSU alum and noted architect Howard Dwight Smith. He patterned the design after the Yale Bowl and Harvard Stadium, but with a few innovative design and construction twists.
For the complete history of Ohio Stadium planning, construction, multiple expansions and disasters, you will want to view this pictorial summary.
The planning and development of the Horseshoe, particularly the public-subscription Stadium Campaign to fund the project is covered at this link, note the interesting Ads and Promotion section.The campaign raised nearly $1 million and the reported final cost of the stadium was about $1.3 million or roughly $20 million in today’s dollars.
The first Ohio Stadium scoreboard, located at the south end, was a manually operated configuration. In this 1922 photo that scoreboard is partially visible. By 1928 temporary bleachers were added to the south end zone and the original scoreboard was gone. Scoreboards were now located on each of the south towers as shown here (and note the scoreboard operators standing on the rear platform).
In 1938, electronic scoreboards replaced the hand-operated ones. In 1956 the scoreboards were upgraded to a larger size, including a new scoreboard addition to the north end of the stadium. These remained in place for nearly 50 years, until the installation of a computerized scoreboard in 1984. Today the Shoe features the latest LED technology in a new 5,200 sf scoreboard.
The scoreboard graphic recreates the Buckeyes 20-9 victory over Michigan in a game played on November 21, 1970 as viewed from the southeast tower. The game was a matchup between two undefeated and untied teams (remember back in 1970 there was no OT in college football, that was still another 26 years in the future) with the winner earning the Big Ten championship.
If you missed the original game broadcast on ABC, you can still watch it here. There’s a brief look at the scoreboard at the 11:35 mark in the video.
A Few Things to Know
• Ohio Stadium was the first horseshoe-shaped, double-deck stadium in the United States.
• The stadium’s original capacity was 66,210, ginormous in size at the time. From inception there was significant concern by university officials the new stadium would never be fully occupied. And this was the case in the 1920s and 30s when games saw less than 30,000 fans. But that all changed after WW II and beyond. Today the Horseshoe’s current 106,944 seating capacity ranks third largest in college football and the fifth largest in the world.
• At an early time in the stadium’s history it featured another “scoreboard” of sorts that you may not know existed. You can learn about this mystery scoreboard and more in the next edition of Classic Football Scoreboards.
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If anyone is interested in purchasing a digital copy of these posters, Gary is working on an online purchase option. In the interim you can contact him directly at Classicscoreboards@gmail.com.
UW’s Friday Flashback
In case you missed yesterday, Paul had his latest piece on ESPN for the new column entitled “Friday Flashback.”
Yesterday’s piece was on the Golden State Warriors’ “The City” unis worn from the mid-1960s through 1972, and which many (including Paul) consider to be “the best uniform in basketball history.” I’d be hard-pressed to find a better one myself — just gorgeous.
So…if you haven’t already, give it a read!
Also, yesterday afternoon, Paul did an ESPN write-up on Thursday’s Color Rash game between the Jets and Bills. Check it out.
T-Shirt Club reminder: Paul here. In case you missed it a few days ago, the Uni Watch T-Shirt Club’s design for the December — the ugly sweater design — is now available. We’re offering it in three formats: a standard short-sleeve tee (American Apparel or Teespring Premium), a long-sleeve tee, or a sweatshirt. It’s a doozy of a design — dig (click to enlarge):
This shirt will be available through next Tuesday, Nov. 17. Again, you can order it here. Thanks.
Uni Watch News Ticker
Baseball News: The Bowling Green Hot Rods, a class-A midwest league team, have announced they have new uniforms and logos (h/t BG Hot Rods). As was seen in yesterday’s ticker, here’s the full set of logos/wordmarks. And here’s a bit more on that.
NFL News: The NFL is ALREADY backtracking on it’s Color Rash mistake. Key quote: “‘The Color Rush jerseys are a test for four games this season, the first of which was last night,’ the league said in a statement. ‘We did test the jerseys this summer on field and on television. The standard television test did not account for color blindness for fans at home that became apparent last night. We will enhance our testing to include a color blindness analysis to better address this issue in the future’.” … Wow — here’s a fantastic ticket stub from the New Year’s Eve 1967 NFL Western Division Championship game! For those of you that might not appreciate exactly what that game was — do the words −15 °F (with a windchill of −48 °F) narrow it down? Yep — that was the infamous “Ice Bowl” game (great, great submission from Mark Hittner, who writes, “I know you like a good ticket stub, and my Dad has a classic.”). … Here is the NY Daily News take on the “Color Rush” game Thursday night. Embedded therein is another link with the Daily News’ 50 worst uniforms ever (thanks to Patrick O’Neill). … The Browns will be wearing white tops, brown pants and brown socks against the Steelers on Sunday. … Meanwhile, the Eagles will be wearing green jerseys and white pants against the Dolphins.
College/High School Football News: The Oregon State University Beavers will be wearing white/white/orange vs. Cal. Speaking of the OSU Beavers, check out this cool overcoat (from Test Pattern) worn by coach Dee Andros. … As many of you are aware, Va Tech & Ga Tech played color-vs-color on Thursday night. The Ramblin’ Wreck, who usually wear white at home, wore blue jerseys as an homage to the 1990 national championship team. Georgia Tech celebrated the 25th anniversary and had a helmet decal as well (thanks to Eric Goldstein). … If you think lifestyle/uniform manufacturers are pervasive in the college ranks, check out this article: “How lucrative apparel deals are changing D-FW high school football” (Thanks to Rob Behrens for pointing this out). … Keeping high schoolers unis clean is a full-time job. … As many of you are no doubt aware, today marks the 45th Anniversary of the Marshall Football plane crash, and today, in remembrance, the team will wear black jerseys. … If this is the sort of thing that interests you, here is an article listing the top 25 high school unis in Oregon. … Flag desecration end zone for the Chattanooga Mocs (h/t Austin Perryman). … Here are some great photos of the Fenway tranformation for the upcoming Notre Dame game (from Warren Junium). And here’s the field. … Miami will be in “traditional” white/white/orange today. … Will the USC Gamecocks be back in black for today’s game against Florida? … Here’s a look at the all-white uniforms Mizzou will wear today. … Also wearing all white today: UNLV.
Hockey News: Holy Shit! Check out this goalie jersey from the KHL All-Star Game in Russia (thanks, I think, to DB Cooper). … “First time I’ve ever seen such extensive personal motivational messages on hockey equipment,” writes Mike Engle. “Puts under-cap brim stuff in baseball to shame. It says: Don’t fear failure. Compete 100%. Play for others. Enjoy the process.” … The Seattle Thunderbirds will be celebrating 100 years of Seattle hockey and wearing some sweet unis to commemorate it (h/t Coach Lyle). … Looks like the Milwaukee Admirals will be doing the Star Wars jersey thing (from Adam Billman). … The Alaska Aces goalie was rocking a Notre Dame mask during last evening’s game (good spot by DirtyAlaskan).
NBA News: Contained within this article complaining about the woeful Philly 76ers starting five are some neat old photos of Philadelphia basketball players. … Check out this awesome photo of Dr. Jack Ramsay coaching the Buffalo Braves (h/t The Sports Paper). … The Memphis Grizzlies will be debuting their throwback Memphis Sounds unis on Monday, November 16th, versus the Thunder. Here are some more photos, and some video. … Raptors coach Dwane Casey thinks F DeMarre Carroll may have plantar fasciitis because he switched shoes this summer (thanks to Mike Chamernik). … “On Dish Network’s Anywhere subscription, apparently they haven’t been told it’s the 2nd season of the Charlotte Hornets,” writes Josh Edney. … Oh, on the heels of Paul’s ESPN piece on “The City” unis, check out this photo of Bruce Springsteen and original E St. Band keyboardist David Sancious from 1974, with the Boss rocking the “City” tee (from Dave Holland). … “I don’t think anyone’s brought this up yet,” writes José Niebla. “For the last two games Kobe’s played in, he has worn a long sleeve shirt under his jersey. According to the league’s poster, undergarments ‘must not be visible under game jersey/shorts.’ Do you know why this is being allowed or is Kobe going to be fined?” … French NBA player Ajinca wore #Pray4Paris on his sneakers last night in Toronto (h/t Aliya-Jasmine).
College Hoops News: Here’s a much better look at the new TCU basketball court which will be used once the stadium opens in December (via Ivor van Esch). … Here’s a look at the new Siena road uniform (from John Dougherty). … New uniforms for Georgia Southern (from Alexander Meltzer). Here’s what they look like in action. Here’s what their previous home and road unis looked like. … Reader Gregory Koch was at a George Washington basketball game and “their mascot is, appropriately, George Washington. On the back of his cape thing, it says ‘George Washington’. I can’t figure out if that is supposed to be school name on back or his name.” … Check out these tremendous old school warm-up pants for Southeastern LA (from Matthew Cunningham). … “Some Jackson State players have blank navy blue nameplates on back, others don’t,” notes Andrew Greenblatt. … Here’s a look at WVU’s new white unis (from Brian Young).
Soccer News: Here’s a good look at the number and letter fonts for the 2016 adidas football home kit, as brought to us by Conrad Burry. … Also from Conrad, the numbers of the away kit font feature a “spraypaint stencil” effect. … Here’s a look at Notre Dame women’s soccer uniforms for the upcoming tournament season (h/t Warren Junium). … The international friendly between Spain and England was not only the debut of Spain’s Euro 2016 uniform, it was the reintroduction of their traditional dark red/royal blue/black color scheme (thanks to Saurel Jean, Jr.).
Grab Bag: When protests don’t quite go the way protests are supposed to go: Georgetown Athletes Are Covering Up The Swooshes On Their Nikes To Protest The Brand–WHILE STILL WEARING THE FREE NIKES. SMH. … Someone in Sujainių, Lithuania, really…REALLY…likes the three stripes (here’s a bit more on that). … A new logo for St. Louis University was revealed yesterday afternoon, as well as a new Billikens logo (h/t Mark Singer). Here’s how it looks on the basketball court (via Austin Kratz).
That’s all for today. Thanks to everyone who participated in the Ambulance Design contest, Dan for suggesting it, Gary for the OSU scoreboard and anyone who tweeted or sent in for the ticker. Lets hope today is a better day than yesterday.
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“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
— Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.