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Revision as of 23:24, 28 December 2013
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{{q| Who the fuck uses GIMP? Doesn't everyone just [[BitTorrent]] the superior Photoshop?|A [[Windows|
Window$
]] luser}}
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{{q| Who the fuck uses GIMP? Doesn't everyone just [[BitTorrent]] the superior Photoshop?|A [[Windows|
Windows
]] luser}}
[[Image:gimp-0.0.1-xterm.png|The first version of GIMP, compatible with [[Uncyclux]].|thumb|450px]]
[[Image:gimp-0.0.1-xterm.png|The first version of GIMP, compatible with [[Uncyclux]].|thumb|450px]]
'''GIMP''' ('''GNU Image Manipulation Program''', not to be confused for The Gimp from [[Pulp Fiction]] or that famous gimp, Ian Whiley) is the preferred image manipulator for [[Linux]] geeks, using the XCF file format. Probably the only open-source image manipulator available so far, 50 million people have downloaded it.
'''GIMP''' ('''GNU Image Manipulation Program''', not to be confused for The Gimp from [[Pulp Fiction]] or that famous gimp, Ian Whiley) is the preferred image manipulator for [[Linux]] geeks, using the XCF file format. Probably the only open-source image manipulator available so far, 50 million people have downloaded it.
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[[Image:Frazgimp.jpg|The common clothing of the modern GIMP user.|thumb|140px]]
[[Image:Frazgimp.jpg|The common clothing of the modern GIMP user.|thumb|140px]]
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==Features==
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== Features ==
Created for the world's best operating system, [[Linux]], the program does complex tasks like opening and closing images with ease. Some tasks, such as editing the image, however, take a lot of time and fuckin' [[l33t]] skillz. It is available from anywhere you can find free software.
Created for the world's best operating system, [[Linux]], the program does complex tasks like opening and closing images with ease. Some tasks, such as editing the image, however, take a lot of time and fuckin' [[l33t]] skillz. It is available from anywhere you can find free software.
While standard editing features are implemented, GIMP comes with a [[Python]] [[Command Line|console]] to perform advanced photo manipulation and snake charming.
While standard editing features are implemented, GIMP comes with a [[Python]] [[Command Line|console]] to perform advanced photo manipulation and snake charming.
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While GIMP does have its hiccups it's way better than Photoshop or Paint.
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While GIMP does have its hiccups
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it's way better than Photoshop or Paint
{{cn}}.
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== Innovations ==
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GIMP is credited with many innovations in the fields of ugliness, crashing-without-warning, and causing pain. Since the release of version 2.6, GIMP has improved its ability to randomly crash while taking all of your unsaved changes with it to once in ever other usage; versions previous to 2.6 were only able to achieve crashes in one out of every three usages, on average. Version 2.8 also brings the ability to ''crash while crashing'' (a modern equivalent of the fork-bomb), a highly-desired feature which can flip the user's computer inside out and suck it into an alternate Hell-dimension made of pure distilled pain.
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As GIMP was originally intended for BDSM enthusiasts dissatisfied with Photoshop's ability to cause sweet, delicious agony, GIMP also includes many features which insult, punish, or inflict physical harm on the user. Many of GIMP's default plugins include preview screens which are smaller than a postage stamp; a single-window mode introduced in version 2.8 allows the user to further reduce the size of their workspace by crushing all of their [[penis|tools]] onto a single display monitor. Lastly, every menu is laid out with the intent of forcing the maximum number of clicks, and the default keyboard shortcuts are carefully obfuscated to cause the maximum amount of frustration.
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Planned features for version 2.10 include filters which berate the user in multiple languages, a plugin which instantly and irrecoverably scrambles all image files on the user's hard drives (including removable and networked storage devices), and a button which covers the entire interface and forces the user to walk on all fours with a ball-gag in their mouth when it is clicked (this has been a requested feature since GIMP's beta stages)
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== See Also ==
== See Also ==