Dear friends,
Many men ask me why Ukrainian and Russian women are looking for men abroad so actively. I have written a few articles on this issue but it is still not clear to many Western men why so beautiful and family-oriented women as Ukrainians are forced to start a (
dangerous
) exciting online dating adventure. As I have already said, the main reason is the lack of (normal) men in Ukraine that makes women look for love abroad.
Find my articles on why Ukrainian and Russian women are looking for men abroad here:
A question about Ukrainian brides: why cannot they find a partner at home?
Why do Single Ukrainian Women Seek Relationships Abroad?
Why Do Ukrainian and Russian Girls Like Western Men?
Why Do Ukraine Ladies In Their 30′s & 40′s Look For A Soulmate Abroad?
From my experience, I would mention that many Western men frequently guess that the multitude of Ukrainian and Russian women seeking Western/American men had something to do with marrying their way out of poverty. However, you will be surprised to learn that there is a much deeper and sadder reason for Ukrainian and Russian women to seek foreign men for marriage; there are far more Ukrainian and Russian women than there are men.
The male/female ratio in Ukraine
Focusing on the Ukraine area, the human sex ratio is 0.852 male/female ratio as of the end of 2012. The sex ratio at birth was 1.065 male/female ratios. Within the popular demographic of 15 to 64 year old the sex ratio is 0.917 male/female.
As I know, the official tally of female to males is 10 to 9 in Ukraine. In some small towns in Ukraine, there may be most likely 9 females to 6 guys who are actually suitable boyfriend/husband material. And this is a really noticeable difference, in my opinion. That makes the Ukrainian men able to be a little picky when choosing their significant other.
The male/female ratio in Russia
How big of a disparity is there? There is very little difference in the male/female ratio under the age of 35. As of February 2013, 45.8 percent of the population falls in the 25-54 age bracket, where the male population is 31,894,116, and the female population is 33,432,996. The gap widens in the 55-64 age bracket where approximately 13 percent of the population falls, and there are 7,926,184 males to 10,711,347 females, according to indexmundi.com.
That big of a disparity has Russian women in a terribly unfair and frightening position. Because men are so scarce, women are at a disadvantage and are subjected to violence, infidelity, and mental and verbal abuse. The women they are so financially dependent that they will settle for whatever a man dishes out because their options are so limited.
You find more information on the the male/female ratio in Ukraine and Russia in my article:
The male/female sex ratio in Ukraine and Russia
Russia isn’t the only country with a lopsided gender problem. It is a well-known fact that China has more men than women because males are preferred over females. There is also a heavily enforced 30-year old one-child rule that carries a on top of that. Defying that rule carries a 40,000 yuan ($6509.24) birth-planning fee and the inability to pay it typically means the baby is killed, even in late stage pregnancies. Females are routinely abandoned, aborted, or killed in infancy.
The reasons for the lack of men in Russia and Ukraine
So what is behind the dwindling pool of Russian and Ukrainian men? Initially, it was because World War II wiped out 29,000,000 people, the majority were men. But it isn’t the usual suspects like population control or war that is behind the absence of men but short life expectancy due to lifestyle choices that lead to poor health. The life span expectancy of Russian and Ukrainian men is a dismal 59-years, writes Pamela Drukerman in her book Lust in Translation: Which Country Has the Highest Rates of Infidelity? That fact leaves 46 men for every 100 women by the age of 65.
This social dynamic breeds insecurity and anxiety amongst the women in Russia and Ukraine, and inflated sense of self in the men. The men know they can do whatever they want without fear of consequences because the women know there are women waiting in line. Most know and have to accept the fact that they are sharing their man so they are in a constant state of competition.
In a situation where women typically support each other through relationship crisis, other women are seen as the ‘enemy’ and women are constantly on the defense with each other, and are deprived of female support and camaraderie.
Moscow Daily Telegraph editor Elena Krivovyaz agrees. “When something or somebody is rare, then it’s of higher value,” and adds, “This circumstance provides men in our society much freedom and power to dictate the rules, which are more convenient for them. I’ve noticed that being a man in our society is way more prestigious and even safe.”
Domestic violence is common and accepted in Russia and Ukraine, and Russian and Ukrainian women are murdered three times more than women from other European countries, according to Frederica Behr of Amnesty International In Moscow. For instance, one Russian woman dies every hour compared to one British woman per week. That is astronomically high and creeping higher, especially with no legal repercussions for domestic violence. It’s a if it is a given that violence is a part of male-female relationships and that the men will be forgiven.
Indeed the attitude about infidelity is much different than it is in the U.S. President Bill Clinton almost lost the election because of his dalliance with Monica Lewinsky, while Russian President Vladimir Putin’s longtime affair with former Olympic gymnast Alina Kabaeva is merely thought of as gossip material, even the fact that they have a four-year old child together is a non-issue. This situation would be a heavily publicized scandal in the U.S.
krystyna
Questions? Feel free to ask Krystyna, your Ukrainian dating expert (s. here: Contact Krystyna)
Love,
Krystyna
Ukrainian Dating Blog