We’re back from the Thanksgiving break and tonight’s Raw has two title matches already confirmed. Sasha vs. Charlotte seems like a “red herring” since Sasha only wins the title on Raw and Charlotte never loses on PPV. Likewise, I don’t really see Gallows and Anderson beating the New Day here. I expect some sort of “cheat to win” hijinks from New Day to get some form of a stipulation match at Roadblock. Of course, doing so would cement that New Day overtake Demolition’s tag team reign record. Other than that, I imagine we’ll have the usual JeriKO stuff and maybe a little hype for the Cruiserweights since 205 Live kicks off tomorrow night. Let’s get to the recap.
WWE Raw 11/28/16 Recap
WWE. Then. Now. Forever. We open with a video package showing the Owens / Rollins match from last week ending with Jericho violating the “banned from ring side” stipulation when he showed up wearing a Sin Cara mask. No video credits, no pyro, and we’re live from Charlotte, NC.
Jericho is already in the ring meaning the Highlight Reel will kick things off. Jericho introduces KO (his best friend) as his guest tonight and makes sure to again call him the “longest reigning Universal Champion”. KO hits the ring and says they’re “best friends makin’ history”. KO then points out that no one in the crowd has ever made history. Owens then buries the crowd for participating in “American Thanksgiving” and for participating in Black Friday. Jericho chimes in calling Americans “cheapskates”. KO says that he and Jericho are a superior type of human… they’re Canadian. A “USA” chant breaks out and KO continue by saying what he’s thankful for. First up, he’s thankful for being “your WWE Universal Champion”. He’s also thankful for “being the face of the premier show of the WWE”. Last, but not least, he’s thankful for his friend, Chris Jericho. JeriKO embrace. Jericho is thankful that KO is his best friend, for his scarf, and that Seth Rollins proved to him what happens when you let “your ego and pride take over your life”. He says Seth is the epitome of a “stupid idiot”. Seth failed to take advantage of his opportunity last night and KO adds that Seth “Rollined himself”. Jericho claims that it wasn’t Chris Jericho wearing a Sin Cara mask… it was Sin Cara wearing a Chris Jericho mask – the Mask of Jericho. KO adds that Seth isn’t cleared to work tonight after the apron bomb. This brings out Roman Reigns to a bunch of boos.
Roman hits the ring and says that JeriKO are just out there doing their schtick and he can see why they’re best friends. Jericho mocks Roman for thinking they’re funny because this is not some kind of joke. Roman says that he thinks KO as Universal Champ is a huge joke. KO flubs his lines, but finally says that Roman calling himself “THE guy” is hilarious. Roman goes back to the “you’re just A guy” catchphrase (groan) and adds that KO needs help with everything. KO says he doesn’t need Chris Jericho, which gets a suspicious look from Jericho. Roman disagrees and says if KO didn’t have Jericho with him he’d have lost the title last week, and the week before that… and the week before that. Jericho chimes in and starts to threaten to put Roman on the List… when Owens screams “SHUT UP!” at him. KO tells Roman he can’t talk to the Universal Champ that way and Roman wants to know “or what”. KO threatens to apron bomb Reigns which makes Roman smile and say “there’s the guy I want to talk to”. He doesn’t want to talk to “Joke Owens Jokes” he wants to talk to “Fight Owens Fight”. Roman suggests a match tonight and if he wins, he gets another title shot at Roadblock: End of the Line. Owens agrees to the match and says that Roman just booked himself on “the Kevin Owens Show”. Roman says he loves that show, but (spoiler alert), by the end of the episode he’ll be kicking KO’s ass.
Later tonight, the aforementioned Women’s Title Match… and a sit down with Paul Heyman to discuss the Survivor Series squash.
Back from break, JeriKO are backstage and KO is hot over Roman’s comments. Jericho wants to know why he was told to shut up and why KO said he didn’t need him. KO claims that Jericho isn’t helping him and really all he’s doing is making people think that KO can’t defend it on his own. Jericho says he doesn’t need KO either… even as a best friend. Foley appears and confirms KO’s match with Roman and before he can start in on Jericho, Chris says he’s “out of here”. So, is this “real” or yet another false “break up” between the two?
Meanwhile, The Golden Truth are already in the ring. R Truth gets to be Braun Strowman’s squash victim this week. Lucky him.
Match #1: Braun Strowman vs. R Truth (w/ Goldust)
37 seconds. Braun appears to be using a running powerslam as his finisher now.
Verdict: Thumbs Down – Oh good. We’re back to this again.
Post “match”, Goldust checks on Truth and then attacks Strowman. It goes badly for Goldust until Sami Zayn appears out of nowhere. Zayn gets in a very minor amount of offense in on Strowman and then gets destroyed. Strowman sets Zayn up in the Tree of Woe again, like last week, but before he can really do anything – the ring is flooded with refs. Foley comes out and we head to break.
Back from break, Zayn and Foley are arguing in the ring. Zayn leaves, angry, and Byron Saxton appears of out thin air to interview Foley. Mick says that sometimes you have people who need to be saved from themselves. Zayn takes issue with this and says if anything he needs to be saved from a GM that seems to have “forgotten who he is and where he’s from”. Foley gets riled up and says that Stephanie doesn’t like Zayn and the match with Strowman is a match he “can’t win and will never win”. Foley claims that Strowman is a monster… fumbles his lines because his teeth fall out… and recovers by saying “HE WILL DESTROY YOU!” Zayn says he’s “looking at a guy who is in my way” and that Foley is taking opportunities away from Zayn. He calls Foley a hypocrite. Trade this guy to SmackDown Live already. Anyway, Zayn storms off to end the segment.
Meanwhile, Charlotte is backstage with headphones on. Dana Brooke enters, holding what I can only imagine is the List of Brooke, and wants to tell Charlotte about her “homecoming celebration afterparty”. Charlotte is annoyed, but will “allow it”. Charlotte cuts a promo putting herself over and says that she’s going to end the rivalry between her and Sasha for good tonight. She then dismisses Dana to go “prepare the celebration”.
Back from break, we get a 205 Live promo and Cedric Alexander’s entrance vs. someone who got no entrance. Oh wow, Tony Nese with no entrance? They’re really doing the Cruiserweights raw here on Raw.
Match #2: Cedric Alexander vs. Tony Nese (w/ Drew Gulak)
I’m not sure this is the way to promote your new show. It’s barely a four-minute match. The guy who didn’t even get an entrance goes over. And they shoe horn in this “Alicia Fox and Cedric have a thing going on” story by showing Alicia watching the match backstage. Oh, and Nese wins with a pump handle slam after Gulak hops up on the apron to create a distraction. Not really anything here that’d make me sign up for 205 Live if I wasn’t already going to watch it.
Verdict: Thumbs In The Middle – The lone positive here was that they’re clearly establishing Nese & Gulak as heels in the Cruiserweight division… which had to happen since a bunch of babyfaces shaking hands before matches and hugging after them was not going to create compelling TV. Sure, in the tournament that is fine, but not for a weekly show. You need some antagonists and so far really only Kendrick has been established firmly as a heel. So, I guess props for them making Gulak & Nese (and to a lesser degree so far, Daivari) the “bad guys” for the new show.
Next, we’re sent to an Enzo & Big Cass WWE Shop commercial.
Back from break, the announcers show us highlights of the JeriKO break down from earlier.
Meanwhile live in the arena, a scowling Chris Jericho has his suitcase and he’s… walking. Charly catches up with him and asks if this is “serious”. Jericho, offended, says “of course this is serious”. Jericho thought KO was a friend, but now he’s not too sure. Jericho then starts screaming “Get the Hell out of here” at Charly and she leaves. Jericho continues… walking… and then screams for his driver, who appears to be wearing a Sami Zayn hat. The driver opens the door to Jericho’s car and causes Jericho to drop the List of Jericho. Seth Rollins appears and asks he “just made the List”. Rollins crawls through the back of Jericho’s car, cuts him off, and they start brawling in the parking lot. Rollins beats the crap out of Jericho, grabs a barricade and throws it at Jericho. It misses Jericho but bounces off of someone’s car. Ouch. Jericho dives back into his car, but Rollins pulls him out and slams him into a SUV. Rollins tries to Pedigree Jericho, but Jericho counters it. Rollins then Pedigrees Jericho on the roof of a car to end the segment. That was pretty fun – we haven’t had a good parking lot brawl in a while.
The Women’s Championship match is up next!
Back from break, we see highlights of the parking lot brawl we just saw.
Next, Sasha’s music hits to a pop. Charlotte and Dana are out next.
Match #3: Charlotte (c) (w/ Dana Brooke) vs. Sasha Banks (WWE Raw Women’s Championship Match)
Wow. What a let down. I seriously think there was a directive handed down where no matches can go longer than five minutes tonight. Sasha goes for the Banks Statement almost immediately, but Dana Brooke helps Charlotte get to the ropes. Sasha kicks Dana Brooke off the apron, the action spills outside, and this ends in a double count out. Seriously. The “10 count” takes about 2 1/2 minutes too.
Verdict: Thumbs Down – Hot garbage.
Post-match, Foley is out while Charlotte celebrates. Foley claims this is “no way for this rivalry to end” so he says the match will continue “later” and become a “no count out, no DQ, falls count anywhere” match. Whew, for a second there I thought he was going to force them to become a tag team and tell them they’re facing the New Day next week.
Back from break, Lana is in the ring to introduce Rusev, who then comes out. Enzo and Big Cass are out next. Enzo cuts his usual spiel and then says that last week Rusev beat him because it was the luckiest day of Rusev’s life. He goes on to call that the “luckiest day of your wife’s life” since she got to see Enzo in his “real form”. Cass then starts listing off Thanksgiving food items. Enzo then says that all Thanksgiving long, Lana was thinking about a “Certified G stuffing her turkey”. This causes Rusev to freak out. Somehow all of this proves that Rusev is “sawft”.
Match #4: Enzo Amore (w/ Big Cass) vs. Rusev (w/ Lana)
Rusev attacks Enzo immediately and then kicks him in the balls for the DQ. Match over.
Verdict: Thumbs Down – Seriously?
Meanwhile backstage, Rich Swann is… dance walking.
Back from break, Charly is asking Mark Henry what it was like working with Aaron Eckhart. Hey, a Mark Henry sighting! Henry puts over Eckhart and then Titus O’Neil enters and accuses Henry of stealing what was supposed to be his “Space Jam” role. Henry goes to leave, Titus grabs him, and Henry shoves Titus to the ground.
Meanwhile, Kendrick is out for guest commentary for the Cruiserweight match.
Swann enters first, Dar enters second.
Match #5: Rich Swann vs. Noam Dar
The longest match on this show so far. Dar gets in a ton of offense, but Swann hits a sharp kick out of nowhere and gets the win. The best part of this match was Kendrick losing it on Saxton on commentary.
Verdict: Thumbs In The Middle – Raw is still doing the Cruiserweight Division no favors…
Post-match, Graves interviews Rich Swann. Rich dismisses Graves and cuts a promo on Kendrick. He mentions that Kendrick is likely doubting himself since Swann has beaten him twice. Swann vows to beat Kendrick a third time and become the Cruiserweight champion on 205 Live. Swann dances in the ring to end the segment.
Back from break, we learn Snickers is still on board with WrestleMania as a promotional partner.
The announcers remind us that New Day may be beating Demolition’s tag record soon, but, right now we’re focusing on Sheamus and Cesaro. You see, they’re hanging out at a bar where the bartender is asking who people think will win the tag title match tonight… just like in every bar in the United States. They start commiserating about Foley’s bad decision to team them together… and then start… arguing. But, Cesaro says “we’ll always have Survivor Series” and then they start agreeing again. Some random guy appears and starts making fun of Sheamus. Some other guy who looks like a Wyatt Family reject makes a Village People joke and then we cut away to random people laughing. This is really happening. Minutes were cut of out of matches tonight for this. The Wyatt reject then belches in Cesaro’s face and I just can’t even fathom why this is on my TV right now. The predictable bar room brawl ensues and this was nothing more than a team building exercise for Shesaro. Sigh.
After the break… Reigns vs. Owens.
Back from break, Roman is out to a mixed reaction. Owens is out next. KO rushes Reigns in the corner before the match can even start.
Match #6: Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns (If Reigns Wins He Gets a Title Match at Roadblock)
This has been the best match on this show but that doesn’t even mean anything. Owens holds a chinlock for longer than any of the previous matches, Reigns fights back eventually, and hits a Spear out of nowhere to get the win. I mean, someone has to face KO at Roadblock and it seems like Rollins vs. Jericho is a thing… so I guess… whatever, right?
Verdict: Thumbs Up – If only because the matches so far on this show have been terrible and at least Roman won clean with his finisher.
Next, the announce teams sells us on the Network. Hey, later tonight we have a tag title match (sponsored by Novartis… yeah, that’s random) and then the Sasha / Charlotte match… continues? Starts over? But next, we see Heyman’s interview about Survivor Series.
Back from break, Owens is backstage and Charly enters. KO gets on case her for trying to interview him and says that his “best friend” got attacked after she interviewed Jericho. KO calls her a “heartless robot” and reiterates that Jericho is his best friend. You see, Jericho’s injury distracted KO during his match and Foley should have canceled the match.
Next, we see video highlights of the Survivor Series squash match. Cole wants to know what happened and Heyman says “we screwed up” and they took Goldberg lightly. Heyman claims the first Spear broke Brock’s ribs and it was all over after that. Heyman says the broken ribs are accepted by Lesnar as part of the game, but the embarrassment goes into the history books for the next hundred years. Heyman says the loss has put Brock in the mindset that he has something to prove. That scares Heyman because that moment can define you, destroy you, or drive you to greater heights. Cole asks what is next for Lesnar and Heyman says that Lesnar will be entering the Royal Rumble match.
Back live, The New Day are out and Big E pours Booty-Os all over the announcers.
Back from break, Emma(lina) is still coming soon.
New Day are still in the ring and Woods reminds us that they’re 17 days away from beating Demolition’s record. Kofi says they beat Sheamus and Cesaro last week by doing what they do best… be the New Day. Gallows and Anderson then enter, cutting off the New Day’s in ring promo.
Match #7: The New Day (c) vs. Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson (WWE Raw Tag Team Championship Match)
Not bad. Woods starts out and gets manhandled for a while. Big E eventually gets the hot tag, but Gallows & Anderson get back in control. Big E thwarts a “Magic Killer” attempt and Woods keeps hanging in there. Anderson goes for a “tights pull” roll up, but Woods is able to reverse it with a “tights pull” of his own.
Verdict: Thumbs Up – I don’t think anyone thought the New Day would lose the titles before the Demolition records is broken. That said, at least they had a compelling match this week and didn’t rely on outside interference to get the win. Not great, but on a show like tonight’s, I’ll take it.
Meanwhile, Sasha Banks is in the locker room getting ready for the continuation of her match. Bayley enters and tells Sasha she knows that Sasha can beat Charlotte tonight. Sasha cuts her off and says it’s not about Bayley, or Sasha… it’s about the championship. Sasha brings up Charlotte disrespecting her own father, so Sasha is dedicating her victory tonight to Ric Flair. So, Ric Flair is returning to screw her out of the title then?
Back from break, Sasha enters. Charlotte is out, sans Dana Brooke.
Match #8: Charlotte (c) vs. Sasha Banks (Falls Count Anywhere, No Countout, No DQ match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship)
Well, this match is insane. Charlotte hits a stairs assisted Natural Selection, Sasha hits Charlotte multiple times with a kendo stick (including breaking up the Figure Eight with a kendo stick shot), Charlotte hits Sasha with a moonsault from the announce table, Sasha hits the double knees off the barricade, and Sasha makes Charlotte tap out to a Banks Statement using the railing in the crowd to add insult to injury. Wow. I mean, I’m sick to death of Flair v. Banks, but this match was great. Now, let’s move on and let some other women do something on Raw, okay guys?
Verdict: Thumbs Up – A totally insane match that ended with an incredibly unexpected finish. This almost makes up for how terrible the rest of Raw was tonight. Almost.
Post-match, Sasha celebrates in the ring and Ric Flair’s music hits. Flair hits the ring and raises Sasha’s hand in victory. We go off the air with Sasha posing in the ring with the belt and Charlotte crying in the crowd.
Well, that was an incredibly uneven show. They at least tried to do something different by “leaving the arena” with the parking lot brawl (which worked) and the stupid bar fight (which did not work). This show felt like it could have been edited down to a really strong one hour program. But, alas it was three hours. Now we have to ask why Sasha Banks is only allowed title wins on Raw and why the Raw Women’s title has to be passed between Charlotte and Sasha like a hot potato. Oh well, SmackDown Live is tomorrow so the worst of this week is likely over.
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