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[[Image:Yeni_mosque%2C_istanbul%2C_turkey.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Yeni Camii, İstanbul, Turkey.]]
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[[Image:Yeni_mosque%2C_istanbul%2C_turkey.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Yeni Camii, İstanbul, Turkey.]] REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE KEBAB REMOVE 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'''Some random things to prepare you for travel in Turkey'''
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*If you are a sexually frustrated woman, you may want to stay away from Cappadocia. The whole countryside is filled with thousands of giant phallic formations - after which, when you try to escape, the neighboring towns are all famous for pottery and every shop has a guy molding clay into long skinny vase shapes on a pottery wheel.
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*Who needs 24 Hour Fitness when you have 24 Hour Mosque? As I sat peacefully in the mosque contemplating such important life questions such as "How will the Israeli and Palestinian conflict resolve itself", "Why can't the Democrats get more media savvy", and "How do these Turkish men have such good abs when there are no gyms".....it came to me....all that prostrating was alot of work - who needs the ab ball or pilates machine when you have Allah!
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*Just remember there's no such thing as a free lunch....When you are offered a "free driver" with your $80 speedboat rental in Olundeniz, you might want to reconsider. Our driver sought out every possible wave on the Mediterranean, told us in detail about the 200 women he slept with over the last year (including how the different nationalities compared with one another - smart American women apparently aren't very good in bed) and invited his friend the speedboat ice-cream man (just like the ice cream man in the truck except he cruises around the open sea with his cooler) to join us. Which wasn't so bad until he grabbed Eva's chest as we were taking a photo.
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*I only have one thing to say about getting a Turkish bath: "Don't!" Be sure to pay the extra $10 for your own loofah. Being the cynic I am looking out for a scam, I refused to pay extra for a loofah. But when we were in the bath and a 300 lb Turkish woman was scrubbing me down with her nasty, crusty, loofah that looked like it had scrubbed 1000 women before me, the $10 loofah seemed like a pretty good deal.
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*Making the OK signal with your hand is not a good idea. It means something very bad in Turkey...
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*Safety, preparation, liability -- all overrated when paragliding in Turkey. After a 45 minute ride up to 6000 feet with absolutely no instruction on how to paraglide or what to expect, in less than 3 minutes I was whisked off the truck, told the "wind was dying...hurry", put in jumpsuit and clipped in, and told to run downhill until the instructor said stop. And then I was flying and it as amazingly perfect! If you ever get the chance to paraglide, do it!
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{| class='thinbox' style='margin:1em auto;' cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"
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| style="white-space:nowrap;" |
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'''Tips for:''' [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for backpackers|backpackers]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for business travellers|business travelers]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for luxury seekers|luxury/exotic travel]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for hitchhikers|hitchhikers]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for families|families]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for seniors|seniors]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for LBG travelers|LBG travelers]] • [[{{PAGENAME}}/Tips for pet owners|pet owners]]
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DonT GO THEYLL KILL U JUST LIKE MY ANSESTERS!!!!!!<br />
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*I AM NOT GONNA CORRECT THIS (above) ABSURD COMMENT BECAUSE I WANT TO CALL THE AUTHORITIES TO MAKE A REPORT SYSTEM / BUTTON IN EVERY WIKI
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==Attractions==
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==Shopping==
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Memo to all merchants at the Grand Bazaar: If you want to get Americans like me to buy stuff in your store....just have the store keeper smoke some pot. I really really wanted to spend some $$ at the Grand Bazaar but the merchants were so pushy that I didn't even want to stick my head in most of the doors. The one place I did end up spending a bit was the shop with the 20 year old stoned shopkeeper. I went up to him and said "how much for these lambskin baby booties" to which he said "40 Lira" to which I said "how about 5 Lira" to which he said "okay...do want a bite of my sandwich". Then I went on to buy quite a few more other things because he left me alone -- and because his sandwich tasted really good.
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==Maps and transportation==
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===Getting to {{PAGENAME}}===
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===Exploring {{PAGENAME}}===
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Places to explore in Turkey by [http://www.realitytravelguide.com/europe/turkey/ Turkey Travel Guide]
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==Practical information and resources==
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[http://www.antalyaairport.co.uk Antalya Airport Turkey]
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[[Category:Places]]
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==Restaurants==
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===Text with links to user-reviews on other pages===
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==Nightlife==
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==Photo gallery==
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{{photo-instructions}}
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<Gallery>
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Image:IMG_1304.JPG
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Image:IMG_0193.JPG
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Image:IMG_0066.JPG
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</Gallery>
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==Everything else==
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{{else-instructions}}
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==External resources==
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Add links to other sites here
[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Places]]