Lee Witbeck, Sports Columnist
If you and your buddies were playing a game of pickup football, who’s the NFL quarterback you’d want to join in and throw passes?
Tom Brady? No way. Even if you think he’s the best QB in the NFL (and he’s certainly in that discussion), no way. Not in a game of tackle football at the park—here are the rules, by the way: no running plays, no pads, everybody is eligible. It’s controlled chaos. The QB says “you run a post, you run a corner, and you run a drag”, everybody lines up, and then the QB runs around for a while until somebody gets open. Does that sound like Brady? No. He’s out. So is Peyton Manning.
You know who you want? Ben Roethlisberger. He isn’t a top 5 NFL QB; he’s probably not even top 10 anymore. But he is hands down the best pickup football QB. Watch these Big Ben higlights—it literally looks like he’s playing backyard football. He runs around, shrugs off huge NFL defensive linemen, throws across his body, loves to chuck it deep, and completes a lot of passes. Perfect. (Here’s your top 5 backyard football QBs: 1) Ben Roethlisberger; 2) Cam Newton; 3) Russell Wilson; 4) Aaron Rodgers; 5) Johnny Manziel. That’s right, your fifth-best NFL pickup football QB isn’t even in the NFL.)
Yesterday, my good friend Ryan Eshoff and I held the first NFL pickup football draft (check out the results here). Having only two teams drafting changes the dynamics, of course, meaning our teams are stacked with talent, but it’s still interesting. As you can tell, pickup football GMs (myself and Ryan Eshoff being the only two in the world) place an emphasis on athleticism and playmaking ability. That’s why Patrick Peterson (check out his pro highlights) was my first pick, and Reggie Bush (owner of the most famous high school highlight tape) my last; that’s why Cam Newton is Ryan’s QB and JJ Watt went first overall.
The point here is that the sport we watch on TV every Saturday and Sunday and the sport we play in backyards on Thanksgiving or as kids are not the same thing. They share the same basic rules, but the particulars of the games are entirely different. (While we’re on the topic, imagine playing against an NFL running back. They’d either run you over, cause you to pull a hammy from chasing after them, or juke you so hard that you literally break an ankle. Imagining playing against any defensive player is also legitimately terrifying. Patrick Willis would break you.)
The game of pro (and college) football is so absurdly advanced that the common fan doesn’t really understand it in the same way the pros do. You can’t, without extensive study. Even the commentators screw it up all the time, especially in this current age of read-option football (more on that in a minute). Knowing who screwed up on defense is incredibly difficult to discern without knowing the play call by the defense—who was responsible for what gap? Who misread their key? Who was supposed to take which man, and where was his help over the top? It’s all extremely complex, and even experienced football minds can’t always keep up.
In this day and age, though, learning a bit more about what’s actually happening on the field can make the viewing experience better. Understanding a little bit about what the defense is trying to do, and whether they are in man or zone coverage, can help lessen the anxiety while your team’s defense is on the field. Learning a few passing routes can help you see why your QB threw a pick when no receiver was even close. Because football is not like baseball or basketball (where, if you played as a kid, you pretty much know what’s going on). Football is a complicated beast of a chess match.
If you want to learn the nuts and bolts of football, read the pieces on Grantland by the industry’s best football scheme writer, Chris Brown.
I’ll Be Watching: Football, Football, and More Football
It will be an early start for me on Saturday, what with my No. 16 Bruins playing at No. 23 Nebraska at 9 A.M. Pacific Time. That’s one game you’ll want to watch, if you’re awake, since it will feature a lot of points from two ranked teams. It’s one of several Pac-12 vs. Big 10 matchups on the day, with Arizona State and Wisconsin playing in the evening in what should also be a high scoring affair between two stylistically disparate teams—ASU spreads it out and slings the rock, while Wisconsin is content to pound the football right at you.
The real highlight matchup of the day, though, is No. 1 Alabama and No. 6 Texas A&M. Ohhhh, college football schedulers, thank you. Thank you. A matchup this big and this good, so early in the season? What did we do to deserve this? A rematch of one of the best games of last season, it’s the nation’s best team (helmed by perhaps the scariest coach in the world, Nick Saban) against college football’s rebel superstar, Johnny Manziel.
Last year, Manziel got the better of the eventual national champions, a fact which I’m certain drove Alabama’s defensive genius head coach absolutely bonkers. How could a young punk like Johnny Football get the better of the nation’s best defense? (Alabama sure has a lot of the nation’s bests, doesn’t it?) If you want to know, read this piece on SB Nation, also by Chris Brown. It’s also a good piece to read just to see how complex the game of football can be. What’s certain is that Alabama won’t let Manziel beat them the same way he did last year. If he is going to, A&M coach Kevin Sumlin will have to come up with something new. And that’s where the fun is. Can he do it? And what will Alabama do to stop them?
It’s not only college football this weekend, though; this weekend offers the NFL matchup many people have been looking forward to: San Francisco at Seattle. Many consider these to be two of the top teams in the NFL, if not the two best teams. If you like hard hitting, well coached, intense football, this is the game to watch. Two great young QBs (Seattle’s Russell Wilson and SF’s Colin Kaepernick), two smart head coaches (Seattle’s Pete Carroll and SF’s Jim Harbaugh), and two stout defenses. It doesn’t get better.
QuickLee: The Read-Option Is (Not) A Fad
Pretty much all anyone wanted to talk about during the NFL offseason was the read-option. With good reason, too, after the 49ers torched Green Bay in the playoffs with several well designed read-option plays. Since then, analysts and defensive coaches alike have said that the read-option will go away, just like the Wildcat did. Pete Prisco of CBS said as much in this column from last season. Of course, if they had asked college coaches, they’d know—the read-option isn’t going anywhere.
Here’s the point many people have missed: the read-option isn’t a singular play. Yes, the most famous is the zone-read play, where a QB reads the defensive end, and either gives the ball to the RB or keeps it for himself. But, again, if NFL coaches and analysts had asked the college guys, they’d know—there’s a lot more coming down the pipe. If you watched Monday Night Football, you saw Chip Kelly and the Eagles give you a taste. Offensive coaches get paid, too, and they have been endlessly creative in college; the smart ones in the NFL will find more and more ways to confuse unprepared defenses. Here’s a short list of things they can do: read the defensive tackle, instead of the end; hand it off, OR throw a bubble pass; hand it off, or keep it and run, OR keep it and throw to a tight end; throw a quick pass, or hand it off on a draw. Simply put, it’s not going away because it’s good play design.
(And no, the answer is not “hit the QB every time”. Firstly, defenders won’t be close enough to do that all the time, and if they are, they’ll have given up a big play; secondly, the experience read-option QBs, like Colin Kaepernick, are smart. They’ve been doing this since college, and know how to avoid unnecessary contact. In fact, the more dangerous plays are, as they’ve always been, scrambles.)
AbysmalLee: Gee, thanks, Carolina
Carolina’s front seven played a heck of a game on defense, but Seattle throws one long bomb and takes the lead at the end of the game… And Carolina’s offense, I don’t even want to talk about it. 7 points??? I’m staying out of the pick game this week. My record is 6-11. I need time to recover.
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