I have a very personal story of redemption that I would love to share with you today.
I know we have not all walked the same path, nor will we.
Some of us have a savior some of us don’t.
No matter where you are in life, who you live life with, and how you live life we all have a story.
And my story was written by God and it’s a story that shows redemption over and over.
This part of my story starts when I was just 13 years old.
I was in middle school, thinking I was the coolest thing to ever walk this planet.
I knew everything and no one would change my mind.
Not to mention I was always right.
What the sky is blue you say… Um nope, wrong it’s indigo. Bam
I digress
I had already discovered boys at a very young age.
I had many “boyfriends” in elementary school.
You know when you have a friend ask them out for you with a note in which they had to circle yes or no; and then by the next recess it was over because they did not smile right or smiled too much.
Geesh things were complicated.
I guess you could say I “fell in love” for the first time when I was 13.
It was a neighbor boy.
We had nothing in common, we never talked on the phone, we rarely hung out but I was in love.
You know that kind of love that a 13 yr girl has…exactly!
moving on.
My boyfriend and I took things to the next level.
And at the young age of 14… I was no longer pure.
I was tainted and a piece of him would forever be attached to me.
No matter how much I tried to wash it away. (metaphor not an an actual something)
Of course we broke up right after that.
It just wasn’t meant to be.
How could it, two young kids, drinking, drugs, sex, lies, betrayal, and not to mention no room for God.
I learned that I could get more boys attention easily based on what I wore and how I acted.
I knew that if you seemed helpless they would help, if you were cold, due to the lack of clothing, they would warm you up, if you were scared they would offer a hand to hold.
And so life went accordingly.
I dressed to impress, I acted like a movie star and life was grand.
Or so I thought.
Not until years later did I realize the reputation I built for my self.
Although I was too prideful to admit that I knew it was my fault.
I soon dabbled in drugs and alcohol which only made me more “cool” more vulnerable, and more trashy.
Fast forward 10 years. I am about to get married to my babies daddy.
We already have a dog and own a house.
I have just found Jesus and knew it was the next step to clean up my life.
I wish I could say getting married fixed it all but that’s a post for another time.
(spoiler: we are happily married with 3 kids and love each other the most we ever have)
Fast forward another 5 years.
Jesus is Lord of my life and I want to live each day for him.
He has opened my eyes to the hurt, pain, and the ever lasting affects my past has caused.
Not just for me but for those closest to my life.
I know that the Lord has forgiven me.
He was erased the pain, shame and guilt from the life I once lived.
He has made me new and I am thankful for that everyday.
Today I am a mom of 3, two of which are girls.
A mom who dresses modestly and strives to live that example for my girls.
I do not seek attention from other men, nor do I want it when it’s given.
I am an advocate for young girls who have believed the lies I once did.
That they don’t need to make others notice them with their appearances.
I want all girls to know that the love of Jesus can fill any void they have in their lives.
That they have a heavenly father that wants to hug them, love them, and speaks gentle words of affirmation in their ear.
God is our protector and defender.
He will never leave us nor forsake us.
I am here today because I chose to follow Jesus.
To surrender my life to him.
To give up my old ways and depend on him, and him only.
Is this easy for me? No, am I good at it, no.
Thankfully God is full of grace and loves me not matter how many times I fall short.
So friends I am here to tell you that God has redeemed my sinful, lustful life and made it new.
He has forgiven me for the awful sins I have committed.
He is faithful in being present in every situation and I am grateful for him.
I would love to talk more with you about how God brought me along this path of redemption.
Leave any questions in the comments and I’ll respond to them.
You can follow along with the rest of my 31 day series here:
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