As of Tuesday afternoon, the Miami Marlins’ minor-league baseball team was called the New Orleans Zephyrs. That was a pretty sweet name. It started with a cool letter, and you had to Google it to find out what it meant.
But on Tuesday the Zephyrs became the latest minor-league team to outlandishly rebrand, becoming the—ugh—New Orleans Baby Cakes.
We're proud to introduce our new identity – the New Orleans Baby Cakes! pic.twitter.com/6kWLXkRmCf
— NOLA Baby Cakes (@cakesbaseball) November 15, 2016
Here's your first look at our new uniforms! Alongside our home and road jerseys, we have 2 alternates and two sets of Pelicans throwbacks. pic.twitter.com/dRH6vM08bw
— NOLA Baby Cakes (@cakesbaseball) November 15, 2016
Sorry, but this is overkill. It was kind of fun when the Hartford Yard Goats announced their absurd name. It started to get ridiculous when the Binghamton Mets became the Binghamton Rumble Ponies, and now it is officially out of control.
Let’s try to figure out the reasoning behind the Baby Cakes name change.
Was it to be fun an unique? Nope, Zephyrs was already both of those things.
Was it to convey fierce competitiveness? Nope, babies are weak and unimposing, and cakes are for eating.
Was it to be more kid friendly? Nope, kids hate babies, and babies don’t even know what babies are.
Was it a nod to a local tradition? Sort of, but “King Cakes” would have worked better in terms of both honoring New Orleans and not sounding ridiculous.
Was it for attention? Yes, yes it was.
they used to be the Zephyrs. They had a nutria mascot.
THAT WAS QUIRKY ENOUGH.
NOT EVERY MINOR LEAGUE TEAM HAS TO DO THIS. https://t.co/TE16HMZe5h
— Rodger Sherman (@rodger_sherman) November 16, 2016
Let’s hope that the backlash the
Zephyrs
Team That Must Not Be Named is getting discourages future franchises from selling their souls for attention. Half an hour of people tweeting about you is not worth a full season of fans chanting, “Let’s go Baby Cakes,” then grimacing and looking down sadly.
Anyway, here is a deeply disturbing video of a baby cake that you will not be able to make it all the way through unless you’re a sociopath. Enjoy!
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