2014-04-06

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

What have been the biggest changes in your life in the last year? How have they affected you?

-Michigander

A:

Dear Ann Arbor:

I graduated. That had a large effect on my location, income, and life trajectory.

Also, my dad got remarried and my brother came home from his mission early. Effects TBD.

I'd actually be surprised if I were married by the next Board reunion, but the one after? Maybe. 

---Portia

A:

Dear Everyone:

In fact, I feel so confident that I won't even be engaged by next reunion, I hereby publicly declare that I will donate $500 to the charity of my choice if I am.

---Portia

A:

Dear Michigan,

1. I started managing an apartment complex in a really nice, very expensive city that's close to my husband's work. This makes things awesome. Except that it is a tiny apartment, less than half the size of what we're used to, so fitting into that is interesting. But free rent in this very nice, expensive city is nothing to complain about.

2. I am going to have a baby in a few months. Great timing on the new tiny apartment, right? The free rent, however, is actual great timing and not the sarcastic kind.

Overall both awesome changes and perfect for us right now. They have affected me by making it so I have free rent and can save up more quickly for a house, and also that now I have a pool where I live, and also by making it so that I know what a moving baby inside feels like. (Bizarre, is what it feels like.)

-Olympus

A:

Dear person,

I moved twice, became a freelance writer, my husband graduated and got a new job, I finally figured out what depression medication works for me, I started therapy, and my lil' brudder came home from his mission. All these things have made my life either healthier or happier. Or both! (Although moving twice was a bit stressful.)

Marzipan

A:

Dear Michigander ~

Yellow started working from home. It. Is. Awesome. I can run errands during nap time. I don't have to wait for him to commute home. He eats lunch with us. On bad days when I just need a hug, I can get one. I am never letting him work in an office again.  Ever.  (Sorry, Yellow.)

I was called as the Stake Primary president.  It is a busy calling. I still think I'm far too young for a stake calling. I love baptisms every month. I do not have a testimony of Scouting, but I'm trying to at least support it and do a good job with what I'm supposed to do. (After I managed to convince them to lessen the number of things I was supposed to do there.)

I am pregnant with Baby 3.0.  (Nym will change upon birth.) He's a boy. This is insanity to me. I'm not sure how to deal with boys. It comes with lots of changes, which at first terrified me, but I'm coming to accept more and more.  Good thing pregnancies are long so I have time to come to terms with it.

Dragon Baby switched preschools and can now read at a 1st grade level.  It's quite possible she'll finish up this group of books and be reading at a 2nd, or even 3rd grade level by the time she enters kindergarten next year.  She loves to read.  She's also fascinated with math and asks us to give her story problems. She's on the wait list for two charter schools, so will likely go to the local public school this year, though we'll try again next year.  Though we'll put a few other public schools on our list next year as well, because there are two nearby that offer immersion.

Niffler Baby is talking like a storm and has become a diva tomboy.  She loves hats (or anything that resembles them, including wet washcloths), necklaces, bracelets, etc.  And has to wear dresses or "skirt dresses" every day. But she's also far more adventurous and brave than Dragon Baby. She likes to be spun around and go upside down. She throws balls and is obsessed with trucks.  We often have a stool in front of our front window so she can watch trucks outside.  (They recently finished building two houses across the street from us.)

I have started doing family history and straightening out the absolute mess that is my Norwegian line.  Because of it I've got a large stack of temple names and it's given me the motivation to go to the temple more often, which is really nice, as my attendance was... spotty.

I also joined a Joy School group which Dragon Baby attends on her non-preschool days.  So every 4-5 weeks I get to teach 5 little girls and it's adorable and fun.  I love the Joy School curriculum.  A lot.

I instigated a Freezer Meal dinner group that is now up to 10 participants, which makes for one crazy cooking day/month, but then 10 yummy dinners to enjoy with little to no prep afterwards.  I also instigated a Craft Night group which meets monthly, homemaking style.  One person provides the supplies and we all meet together, sans kids, for a crafty girls' night.

Pretty much, I'm super busy and mostly my own fault.  But I'm also loving life and it's been a great year.

~ Dragon Lady

A:

Dear Michigander,

I've spent the past year and some dating my boyfriend. It has been an interesting relationship, for many reasons, including that I've never, ever been in a romantic relationship where I've wanted to spend this much time with someone. I typically like space, and it has been nice to need less of it. I've also learned a lot about myself from him. And I get teased about my upbringing every time I attempt to cook for two people.

I decided to go back to school. That meant changing jobs so I could work part-time (32 hours a week), taking on a full-time courseload, and doing an internship for 15 hours a week. Perhaps unsurprisingly, my depression and anxiety made their first very significant appearance in years and I had lot of trouble kicking it. As a result, halfway through my second semester, I decided to take a leave of absence from school, which meant changing jobs again and completely restructuring my life. The whole thing has been a little emotional whiplash-y, but I'm proud that I am taking care of myself.

In that vein, this year was the first time I was compliant with a psychotropic medication recommendation. Fluoxetine and buspirone forever!

This year was also the first time I engaged in therapy as the therapist. At first it was petrifying. I can't wait to get better at it once I return to school.

It's been a nutty year but I'm happy with where I am right now and where I'm going.

- The Black Sheep

A:

Dear Michigander,

I discovered Oreo Fudge Cremes, which was really very bad.

No Dice

A:

Dear Michiganian,

Aside from graduating and getting a job and moving to a new city and dating and all that boring junk, the biggest change from last year around this time was getting blind-sided by a high-end audio hobby several months ago that now takes all of my spendable dollars and many of my waking hours away from me. If anyone out there is into flagship-level headphones, shoot me an email and I will talk to you about it endlessly.

--Gimgimno

A:

Dear friend--

The biggest change for me was that my brother died, a few months ago. I had devoted the majority of my time to his care for several years, so his passing left a large void (what do you do with yourself when you don't spend all day every day caring for someone?). And then about a month after that I had another baby. As all that was happening, I found myself undergoing a gigantic spiritual transformation that radically altered pretty much every aspect of my paradigm. I view the world much differently now compared to how I used to, and getting where I am today from where I was this time last year was, no lie, spiritually excruciating. From about July to January, I told my amazing husband, it felt like God was ripping out all my innards and replacing them. Ugh. Ouch. Ouch is an understatement. But happily, that ugly transitional moment is over (for now!) and I am now peacefully enjoying my new outlook. So, lots of changes. But good ones. Still adjusting to the new normal. But I like it.

- Lexi Khan

A:

Dear Friend From The State Up North,

I have to imagine that you are asking this to get some support for the horrific situation in which you find yourself. I know that living in Michigan must be tough. Don't fret! Ohio is only a short drive away. 

The biggest change I had this year was at work. Our building has five floors.  My desk was formerly on the 2nd floor, but recently my group was moved to the 5th floor.  It has mostly affected the amount of time I spend in our building's elevator.  I was willing to walk up one floor to my desk.  I'm not willing to walk up four floors.

Again, good luck dealing with your unfortunate living situation. If you can't outright move to the greatest place on earth (Ohio, obviously), perhaps you can at least go on some day trips. 

I sure hope this helps. Please don't hate me. 

- Brutus 

A:

Dear Michiganary,

Over the past year I've gone through a series of minor heartbreaks and their aftermaths. I've had a lot of growing up to do. And it's all pretty personal, but I'm a better woman for it, I think.

In other news, both of our children started preschool (same school, different classes) last fall, just as Sauron began his second year of his PhD program. This opened up a few hours a day for me to work. I worked from home before, but it was pretty touch-and-go as I also watched my kids all day. So I began working for a friend of mine, picking up her extra freelance design work when she was overwhelmed. Then in the winter I impulsively applied for a gig involving drawing for hours on a store-front window. Amazingly I got the job, and while working there a woman walked by and asked if I "do Bat Mitzvahs." I wasn't sure how to respond to that, but I gave it a go. This opened up a series of Bar/Bat Mitzvah jobs; I attend the parties as a service vendor, and I've done face painting, henna tattoos, and decorative name-writing on mirrors and vases. I'm now connected with a party planner who gets me a couple of gigs a month. It's a blast and pays good money. I still do design and illustration work here and there. Really, I take whatever little jobs I can find.

The result of all this is that now we feel like we have a little spending money. That's an entirely new feeling in our marriage. Forget the debt from the master's degree...(no, we didn't forget it, and we have started paying it off)...

So we've used my new mad stacks to have adventures as a family. We've taken a few trips, including a 12-day road trip up the coast of California to Seattle and back. The redwoods are magnificent, by the way, if you've never been.

I feel like I'm a very different person than I was a year ago, or even six months ago. More confident, more grateful, happier with myself. Living with a little more courage and abandon rather than the anxiety and hesitance that I acquired in my postpartum days. This makes me a much better mother and wife. And friend. LA tends to attract young creative people and then drive them away due to the cost of living and lack of ideal jobs, so I lose local friends just as soon as I gain them. But I've connected pretty deeply to a few long-distance friends, and it's been a magical experience.

It's also pretty magical to watch these two kids grow up. To see the gradual changes and the sudden ones. My three-year-old is writing words now, and my five-year-old is reading. They're making jokes that are actually funny sometimes, and they're learning empathy and some complex social nuance. They're manipulative as heck. They have big hearts and big brains.

So that's where I'm at. Thanks for asking.

With love,

Waldorf (and Sauron)

A:

Dear Gander,

I got laid off from a job that I used to LOVE, but I was totally ready to go.  So, they basically PAID me to leave.  That was both convenient and scary, because I didn't really have an immediate option or plan.  But, I had enough savings to not be in a hurry and learn for 6 months or so.  And, now, things are falling into place quite nicely for the next steps of my life.

So, that was pretty significant.  Luckily, Mrs. Horatio and Baby Horatio were both very supportive in the process (mostly because we were financially stable, and the cost of failure was relatively low).

The biggest thing I learned from that process is to understand my family's risk profile and safety nets.  My wife is very risk-averse, I'm pretty gung-ho crazy about random new adventures.  We talked a lot about the options, spent some time in the temple (yes... Horatio is temple worthy), and figured out what we were willing to do.  We also put ourselves in a position where the cost of failure was low.  We have a house that we could sell easily, some money in the bank, and parents in Utah with basements if necessary.  So, it put us in a position to take some more risk, because we knew how far we would fall.

Raise glasses of red punch to NEW ADVENTURES.

 

That is all.

Horatio.

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