2016-04-08

The Tigers are playing baseball. The Pistons look like they’ll be playing the LeBrons in the first round. Media members will be coming to Detroit.

Often, Detroit gets lumped in with Cleveland and Indianapolis as some sort of weird, Rust Belt purgatory. We’re not even cool enough for MLS to come within a four-hour drive.

However, Detroit has hipsters (you may have read a New York Times article or seven about it). Detroit also has a diverse population and a number of historic ethnic enclaves. While I won’t try to sell you on the weather, there is some great food.

I like to eat well and, occasionally, in large volume. I would not describe myself as a foodie. I’m content with well cooked wings. There is a long list of places I have not tried yet. I do other things. These are my food recommendations. Do with them what you will.

If You Have One Night…



Katoi [Corktown] Katoi was a food truck. They had a brief residency in Ann Arbor. They just opened a brick and mortar place in Corktown. Every review describes it as “Thai-inspired” so I’ll go with that. We did not order the ribs or fried chicken the first visit (a mistake that will be rectified). Particularly liked the sweet potatoes and other veggie dishes. They have “elevated cocktails” or, if you don’t swing that way, $3 bottles of Chang to cut the heat.

Public House [Ferndale] Public House is our default restaurant. It started as sliders. Now, it’s some sliders and small/medium sized plates of deliciousness. They have rotating craft beer taps that would satisfy even the fanciest beer snob. They do the occasional menu takeover. Would recommend the Chinese sticky ribs and the Smoked Brisket and Egg sandwich. Pro-Tip: parking in Ferndale can suck. Turn right down the street just south of Nine Mile and park in the lot behind it.

Al-Ameer [Dearborn] One impact of having the largest Arab-American population in the United States: really great schwarma and kafta. Al Ameer is modest, finely done Lebanese food. They are fresh off a James Beard award. Get fattoush, moujadra, kibbeh, hommus, and as much meat as they will bring you.



Gold Cash Gold [Corktown] Gold Cash Gold is an old pawn shop refashioned as a charming, locally sourced farm to table restaurant. Basically pure “New Detroit.” The chef is Southern. I keep meaning to try everything else and end up ordering the pickle-brined fried chicken. It’s hard to beat pickle-brined fried chicken.

Green Dot Stables [Corktown] Green Dot has 21 different types of sliders, five different types of fries and some other stuff. The fried chicken, the catfish, and the Korean are my favorites. If you stick to beer and wine, everything on the menu is $3 or less. They have an outdoor bar with picnic benches while you wait for the table. Don’t plan to park there for the evening. They turn over tables quickly.

Deeper Cuts



168 Asian Mart [Madison Heights] It’s an Asian grocery store. Proceed to the counter in the back right corner. Put what you want in a bowl. They will make Szechuan hot pot (No. 2, I think). They also have dim sum and barbecue. It’s a slow-burning peppery heat, not an outright hot heat. Don’t be the jerk who orders the hottest level because you like spicy food. I go through two bottles of water and a can of sweet tea with the medium.

The Royal Eagle [Harper Woods] The Royal Eagle is a Russian Orthodox monastery. They serve traditional and surprisingly light and delicate Russian food. Well worth the trip. First caveat: they are only open on Thursday evening. You need to plan this about six weeks in advance. Second caveat: the monks are serious about the dress code. Wear sleeves. If your skirt isn’t below your knee you will be selecting from their bin of giant wrap skirts to cover yourself.

Mercury Burger & Bar [Corktown] Mercury has solid burgers if you like toppings. I go for the “NY, NY” or the “Torpor” Burger. As importantly, they have tater tots. They will cover them in chili and cheese or poutine. They will make nachos with them. They will cook them in hot sauce to eat with blue cheese. If you want more of a standard cheeseburger, hit Miller’s Bar in Dearborn.

Johnny Noodle King [Corktown] Johnny Noodle King has the same owners as Green Dot Stables. Same principle but with Ramen. I normally order Shoyu with both pork belly and shredded pork and extra noodles. The small appetizers are often quite good. As with Green Dot, have a second place to go. They will get your ass out of there in 45 minutes.

Yemen Cafe [Hamtramck] Doesn’t look like much from the outside, but the food is magnificent. Described broadly, it’s Middle Eastern with influence from Africa and India. Would go for fahsah and lamb haneeth. Also the bread is incredible.

Steve’s Deli [Bloomfield Hills] In New York you get pastrami. In Detroit you get corned beef and much better rye bread. Drive to Zingerman’s in Ann Arbor if you must. I’m fine with a gigantic Reuben (or two to have one to eat later) from Steve’s Deli.

Advice

Coney Dogs… This always come up, as though Detroit’s some godforsaken outpost like Cincinnati where the apex of cultural achievement is dumping chili on stuff. A “Coney Dog” is a hot dog topped with Greek chili. It may include cheese and onions. Wikipedia refers to this as “a Michigan.” No one here will know what you are talking about if you say that.

A “Coney Island” is a diner that will sell you this and probably put the aforementioned chili on fries or an omelette. Lafayette street for the American vs. Lafayette Coney Island is the customary pilgrimage. I would skip American and double down on the more old-school Lafayette. Though, to be honest, not sure it is that much better than the myriad of other Coney Islands.

Detroit-Style Pizza… Yes, Detroit is home to Little Caesars and Dominos. We apologize. “Detroit-style” is square, originally cooked in old industrial pans. The crust is thick like Chicago deep dish. But, it is topped more traditionally. The cheese spreads to the edges of the crust and burns just the right amount. Be willing to throw elbows for corner slices. Buddy’s Pizza will set you straight.

If you’re a fetishist from the East Coast with rigid definitions of what constitutes “pizza,” go to Supino in Eastern Market. I’d recommend eating it there. It doesn’t travel as well.

Craft Beer… Michigan is one of the craft beer meccas. Bell’s. Founder’s. Etc. Etc. Etc. Hop Cat in Midtown will have everything under the sun on tap. If you must go to breweries, Atwater has establishments in Grosse Pointe and Detroit. I’ve heard good things about Jolly Pumpkin, though I’m not a huge sour beer fan. Griffin Claw in Birmingham has a nice outdoor patio if the weather cooperates.

Cocktails… Do you want to pay $10-plus for a drink made by a certified Detroit hipster? I’d go to Detroit City Distillery in Eastern Market or Two James Spirits in Corktown. I would also throw Wright & Company out there, for drinks. It’s a beautiful space in an old building. The food is not terrible, but you can eat better, cheaper, and in a timelier fashion elsewhere.

Downtown Birmingham… It’s a fine residential neighborhood. It’s a cute place to walk around. The bar scene is okay, if you’re into affluent and douchey places. Don’t eat there. Prices are high. Food tops out at mediocre. You will leave both disappointed and poorer.

Don’t Say It’s Like Brooklyn… The first thing people will say about revitalizing Detroit is it’s not Brooklyn. Having lived in Brooklyn…it’s quite similar to Brooklyn, or, at least, the Platonic ideal of Brooklyn. The white, artistic types are the same, as are the reclaimed industrial spaces. Differences? it’s less self-satisfied. It’s far easier to park. Mom and Dad aren’t footing the rent. They may be providing an official residence for car insurance purposes. Note the similarity to Brooklyn, just don’t note it to others.

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