"I can't believe how much energy this took!"
For a lot of people, the holiday season is all about faith, joy, love, family, good meals and presents. I love the core of the holidays: family, faith, and love, but all the added social situations leave me tired and ready to retreat. For me, the holidays are a time of high anxiety because I am an introvert. Introverts are people who thrive best when they are alone. We are often called shy, thoughtful, quiet or even reserved. Unlike extroverts, who come alive when surrounded by tons of people, introverts love their solitude. And this is precisely why the hustle and bustle of the holiday season was too much of a hassle for me, for years.... I love the family life but with it came the stress of climbing ladders and putting up lights trimming a Christmas tree and all that shopping.
From Thanksgiving until New Year’s Day, the streets, malls and coffee shops are filled to the brim with more people than any time during the rest of the year. No place is safe from the throngs of eager shoppers or people on their way to holiday parties and dinners. Anarchy much? So why would I miss all that?
"I need to avoid getting drunk because I have to drive home!"
And the holiday social gatherings can be a bit of a nightmare for us introverts. I shuddered at the thought of being forced to attend the mandatory holiday office parties where you are forced into cramped environments with drunken co-workers and bosses. Everything is loud and close and emotionally chaotic. Most people can get through the office holiday party because there’s usually an open bar and free food, but for me, nothing free is worth the amount of time it will take to recuperate from the frenetic atmosphere.
"you look like you are not enjoying this gathering!"
After a major Saturday night holiday function, I have to be sure to free up my Sunday so that I can sleep and regain my energy, the problem is I can't sleep during the day, I need complete darkness to be able to sleep well and feel rested. The morning after a big soiree or extreme social outing, I always experience an emotional hangover. It’s important that I have time to get myself right before delving into more social situations, if I can help it. My favorite sound during the holiday season is that of my front door lock clicking into place and the exhale I take after plopping down on the couch to watch MSNBC or ESPN and chill–by myself. (An ideal activity for both introversion and flirty nights.) this was something I could not do while I was married with two sons and all my in-laws visiting from up north trying to get away from the snow and cold weather.
As an adult, I have taken it upon myself , in the past to organize situations where small groups
I Loved having the family together but I really was not crazy
about the amount of people
(married years) of family (in-laws) and friends can hang out at my house to celebrate. The normal inclination for a guy like me is to avoid having a night out on the town, I choose not to put myself in any annoying/anxious situations by bringing it home to with in my control. I sometimes wonder what it’s like to be an extrovert or to just be able to enjoy fully a big social encounter and go on about your day, but I recognize that I’m just not one of those people. And I’ve tried. Believe me, I have.
I so get this ladies point!
In the last three weeks, I’ve had to attend a few social events and there’s still two more to go (I'm planning to skip these) until Christmas Day. Thankfully, I have a small family now, so I don’t have to deal with the insanity of Christmas Day gatherings. But I have to remind myself that I’m almost at the finish line to retain my composure. It’s important for me to keep the finish line in sight and it’s an extremely helpful exercise for me to count down the days until my major social obligations are over. For me, Christmas is just about getting out on the other side so that I can fall back into my quiet routine. So know that as you’re dabbing your way through your Christmas party this weekend, I’ll be at an Ugly Christmas party dreaming about the sports channels bowl games and chilling on January 2, 2016. But at the end of the day, I am just a run of the mill guy,who has mixed feeling about Christmas.Maybe you can also relate to this old school song.
O'Jays - Christmas Just Ain't Christmas Without The One You Love