On the British daytime television show This Morning, hosts Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby invited Jemima Packington to talk about her amazing gift. Believed to be the world’s only “asparamancer,” Packington uses her divine gifts and bundles of asparagus to give rock solid predictions about the future, like who will win the Oscar for best motion picture. Casting a loose bundle over a nearby coffee table, Packington tossed the veggies and then realized that a noticeable “M” had appeared. So, a hearty congratulations to George Miller, Charlize Theron, and Tom Hardy of Mad Max: Fury Road and/or Ridley Scott, Matt Damon, and Jessica Chastain of The Martian for your upcoming victory.
Schofield and Willoughby themselves were up for an award for best live magazine show at the UK’s National Television Awards. They asked Jemima to reveal their destiny. “Now, that’s straightforward,” Packington said after throwing the asparagus down. “Absolutely straight as a die leading from This Morning to the NTA’s.” Amazingly, This Morning did win.
Now, if you think this asparagus thing smells, don’t worry. Packington was grilled and came out looking legit. “Does it work with celery?” Schofield inquired. ”No,” our favorite soothsayer said. ”There’s something about this weird, earthy vegetable that just picks up all the good vibrations from everybody.”
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