Edited to add...a form for people wishing to help with the Childhood/Teen TV edition.
Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV. The regular TV season has now officially ended, but that doesn't mean there's nothing left to discuss. Along with the summer season getting bigger than ever it seems, it is the kick off to marathoning season. Luckily, our own Jessica VanWinkle is starting us off with ER. If you have a show you're marathoning and you'd like to guest review it, please let me know in the short form below. You'll find it underneath the nomination form, where you can suggest a show for me to review in 2 simple questions. In other upcoming news, one week we're going to focus on childhood shows. The goal is to find a show people liked as a child/teen and see if it still holds up now. To do this, I need help. I'm looking for about 15 people to watch a few episodes of a show they used to love years ago. Then they would write a few sentences of what worked and what didn't and choose 3-8 awards for those episodes. It doesn't have to be long. This is more to get people thinking about their favorite shows from the past and maybe revisit some themselves. Let me know if you are interested. The more shows we cover, the more fun that special edition will be. Hopefully this Childhood TV version will be posted the last full week of June so you have plenty of time. Until then, sound off on the TV you watched last week in the comments or what shows you're looking forward to this summer, and as always, happy TV viewing.
Episode of the Week
The Musketeers - 3.01 - Spoils of War
Now that's how you kick off a season, especially a final season. It's also how you do a proper time jump. Even though 4 years have passed, the characters are still recognizable. Sure they are more world-weary or on a different career path, but they haven't suddenly become different people. (Looking at you, The 100.) Athos is still the wise leader, who isn't above questioning a commander's faulty judgment. D'Artagnan is still rash, always jumping in before thinking things through. Porthos is still the snarky soldier who gets things done and Aramis is still the nurturer, taking care of those around him while able to hold his own in a fight. When fate and missing war supplies bring the Musketeers and Aramis back together, things are not all rosy, especially between Porthos and Aramis, but bromance reigns large by the end of the episode. While I tend to avoid emoangst at all costs, it was smart to show how hurt Porthos was by Aramis' decision to leave the Musketeers. I especially liked his speech about not having someone watching his back because Aramis ditched them. It was honest and a good reminder of how close these two once were. I liked even better though, them working together to take out the powder before it could get in the hands of the Spanish. Actually, I just like them working together period. Another plus is the new villain. Purportedly it is Feron, who is as unlike Rochefort as it gets. Rochefort was crazy for crazy's sake, which gets old fast. Feron is actually a tiny bit sympathetic. He's going to make life hell for our heroes but it's nothing personal. He is only trying to lessen his pain and by doing so, puts himself under the thumb of a vicious mercenary, a merchant of death. Truly Feron got screwed over by being the half-brother of King Louie. Not that Louie is mean to him. Louie's too stupid and self-absorbed to care about that at all. Instead Feron has a tenuous standing in society for all that he is Governor of Paris and he inherited a particularly painful medical condition from his father. That makes him ripe picking for Lucien, who is the real bad guy of the season. All in all, the time jump has allowed us not to have to rebuild from Rochefort and reunited our heroes in the middle of a war with Spain. Not a bad setting for a final season.
Grade: B+
Status - this will be the last season
Best Reason to Watch - Sword fighting. It is always sword fighting. But the explosions were nice too.
Best Scene - Aramis and Porthos work together to blow stuff up
Best Awww Scene - Porthos makes a new friend, who is about 4 years old
Best Character Interaction - Treville vs. Feron / Aramis and Porthos
Best Opening - Starting mid-battle against overwhelming odds? Yep, I wouldn't expect less from this show.
Best Action - Aramis takes out everyone to protect the kids
Worst Prank - Louis pretends to have fainted
Most Dangerously Juvenile Prank - Constance, Treville, and the intern get back at the Red Guard by starting a fire…in Paris…back when whole cities went up in flames with less
Most Likely to Hold a Grudge - Porthos over Aramis leaving the Musketeers
Most Sympathetic Bad Guy - Feron, whose pain consumes him and so he makes bad choices to relieve it
Biggest Moron - Luc, who jeopardizes everyone because of his own curiosity over and over again
Biggest Douche - the general
Biggest Waste of Space - still King Louis
Biggest What the Heck - The mercenary just drives a knife into Luc, knowing that Aramis is holding a gun on him? What kind of strategy is that? You just took away your human shield. You're too dumb to live.
Smartest Plan - bomb the gunpowder
The "Yeah, Don't Think He Cares" Award - If Lucien didn't care about murdering people, I really don't think he cares about the monastery rules. So long, Abbot.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Rupert Everett from 90's movies
Best Quotes -
1. Treville: "The list of things you're not doing, Feron, grows longer by the day." Feron: "It is a little early to be challenged to a duel, Treville, even of words."
2. Porthos: "Next time I'm using the front door."
3. Luc: "Your name's Porthos? After the hero in the stories?" Porthos: "Stories? I was named after my mother's father." Luc: "You are THE Porthos." Aramis: "THE Porthos. This is THE Athos and THE…" D'Artagnan: "D'Artagnan." Luc: "The stories were true." Athos: "Our reputation precedes us."
4. Athos: "You are many things, Aramis, but a monk is not one of them." Aramis: "You can't argue with God."
5. Treville: "You cannot distract the King forever, Feron. Sooner or later, I will have my say." Feron: "That is your problem, Treville. You never stop having your say. Is anyone really listening, hmm?"
Nominated Episode
Grandfathered - 1.20 - Jimmy's 50th, Again
Originally I was going to marathon the last 12 episodes of Grandfathered, but I learned 3 episodes in that this is not a show I can marathon. Gerald is too much for me to take in big doses. In the end I stopped watching after 1.13 and jumped straight to this episode. Of what I watched recently, I like this episode the best. The flashback was a great idea since it gave a lot of back story, but it also showed how all the characters grew just by meeting or rediscovering each other. This comedy often tries to portray Jimmy as the wrong one but I like how both Gerald and Sarah's lives have been enhanced by having Jimmy in it as well. Don't get me wrong. That doesn't mean I sanction this annoying love triangle or even want Sarah and Jimmy together in the end. Catherine seems really awesome for a TV trope. I just like the family dynamic shown here. I do wish this show had more laughs though. I rarely laugh out loud in it, more like minor chuckling. It does have an abundance of heart nonetheless.
Grade: B-
Ranking: 2+
Status - cancelled
Audience - John Stamos fans and those who like their comedy with more heart than laughs
Best Reason to Watch - back story to what was going on right before Gerald showed up in Jimmy's life
Best Scene - Annelise tells Jimmy that it doesn't matter what his dad thinks of him
Best Reference - Scandal / Robert Downey, Jr.
Best Metaphor - Sarah and her apology crème brulee
Best Addition - Catherine
Worst Salesperson - Gerald, who tells people to buy their stuff somewhere else
Biggest Cliché - the love triangle takes a step forward only to take a step back
Most Depressing - Gerald's best friends are also his mom's best friends
Least Cool - Sarah, trying to drop music terms
The "Poor Baby" Award - Jimmy's dad died before they could make up
The "Welcome Back" Award - Alan Thick from Growing Pains and How I Met Your Mother / Paul Sorvino from Law and Order and gangster movies
Best Quotes -
1. Sarah: "What I'm try to say is I'm sorry. I'm sorry I kept the two of you apart for so long." Jimmy: "So these crème brulees are me?" Sarah: "They were supposed to be."
2. Jimmy: "You think my life is empty? You think my dad's right?" Annelise: "Jimmy look, it doesn't matter what your dad thinks and it doesn't matter what I think. It only matters what you think." Jimmy: "But why don't you just tell me what you think to guide me in what I should think?" Annelise: "I think you should shave that goatee. Just because you can pull it off doesn't mean you should."
3. Catherine: "It's the woman Olivia Pope is based off of. Excuse me. I have to take it." Gerald: "I'm confused." Jimmy: "Oh that's Kerry Washington's character on Scandal."
4. Annelise: "Catherine, I saw you give a TED talk to 5,000 people. This candle business is beneath you."
5. Jimmy: "Great news. I convinced my dad to fly out for my big birthday party." CJ: "You have a dad?" Victor: "I always just imagined he hatched from a leather egg."
Guest Reviews
12 Monkeys - 2.06 - Immortal
BY BlueStar
This was an interesting episode, and my favorite of the season so far. Cole and Ramse go on a mission together to prevent two messengers from paradoxing a man named Kyle Slade, who is a serial killer in 1975 (who we later learn is also from the future and is killing people so the messengers can’t paradox them). They manage to convince two police officers to let them ride along to find Slade, who Cole saved a waitress from the night before. The police capture him, but Cole frees him from their protection after Slade tells him he knows where the Witness is – that he captured him. Cole later discovers Slade had only caught a messenger, not the real Witness. Moments later Ramse, after killing the second messenger at the Emerson Hotel, finds them. So do the police, and Slade sets off a bomb. Cole shoots him, preventing any messenger from being able to paradox him. Finally a win for the team! Meanwhile, the real Witness tries to get to Cassie by masquerading as Aaron and saying The Red Forest would mean no more death. Jennifer tells her that The Red Forest will be hell, not a perfect world. The episode ends with Cassie seeing the Witness in his cloaked figure form and her eyes turning mysteriously black.
Grade: A
Best Reason To Watch – Cole and Ramse working together to find Slade and the ending scenes of the episode
Best Scene – Tie between Jennifer talking to Cassie after the Witness visits her and the scene leading to the bomb explosion
Best Music – Slow Ride by Foghat (Great way to start the 1975 part of the episode, especially since that’s when the album with the song was released)
Best News – Killing Slade not only prevented a paradox but also healed time!
Most Adorable Scene – Cole and Ramse playing a game with Sam
Most Exciting – Another two messengers down, only two to go. Wow, the other ten sure died quick!
Most Selfless - Sam, who tells Ramse it is not just about his future, but everyone else’s too.
Most Insightful – Sane Jennifer is really an awesome character. She still has the quirks that make her her, but now also has a sense of wisdom about her. I can see now why some would want to follow her in the future.
Best Quotes:
1. Cassie: “He – um, told me he wants to destroy time…so there’d be no more death. He made it sound almost beautiful.” Jennifer: “Well, it’s not. Death is like…everything. It’s a time clock that makes us better. Makes us love harder. I don’t know – I think it’s like, maybe…what makes us human.”
2. Ramse (to Cole): “I used to think you were insane. I realized it’s something else, right? Something in here. (Puts his fist over his heart) Never gonna change, and it shouldn’t. I think one of these days it’s gonna help us out of this mess. Until then, somebody’s got your back.”
3. Cole: “Listen, man, you know I love you.” Ramse: “Oh, what are you doing?” Cole: “What?” Ramse: “You don’t say that.” Cole: “Say what?” Ramse: “You never say that.” Cole: “No, I was gonna say I love whiskey, and we should go find some and drink it.” Ramse: “No, you weren’t. You were gonna declare your undying love for me, brother.” Cole: “Don’t flatter yourself, okay?” Ramse: “I heard you.” Cole: “You’re being emotional right now. I heard that happens to new parents.” Ramse: “Listen, I’m not being emotional. You’re being an a**hole, okay?” (They walk away together) Ramse: “Me too.”
ER - 1.01 - Pilot
BY Jessica Van Winkle
In the very first scene of ER, viewers are introduced to Dr. Mark Greene. He’s sleeping in the on call room, but is woken up by a nurse. Dr. Greene is needed to help another doctor. Dr. Doug Ross, a pediatrician, is drunk and needs fluids. Apparently he drinks on his nights off and always comes into the ER to sober up. Besides Greene and Ross, we meet Dr. Susan Lewis, a fellow ER resident who is close with Mark; Dr. Peter Benton, a surgical resident; Carol Hathaway, the head ER nurse; and John Carter, a medical student. The two hour pilot gives us some insight into the characters. Peter is very talented and thinks very highly of himself. I’ve read that Eriq LaSalle was meant to be the star, and I can definitely tell that from how much time this episode spent on his character. He was my favorite in this episode; I love how snarky he was! We also learn that Mark is married and has a young daughter, and Carol and Doug have a romantic history. Besides learning about the ER staff, the episode does have some medical action. Dr. Benton performs his first solo surgery even though he wasn’t supposed to, and med student Carter tries to adjust to being in the ER. The episode ends with Carol attempting suicide. The staff is shocked as Mark steps up and tries to save her. Doug is especially distraught. We’re left to wonder if she survives. I liked this pilot; I thought it did a good job of balancing medicine with the characters' personal lives.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - The medicine. The ER staff try to save lives and work together in a busy Chicago hospital.
Best Scene - Dr. Benton’s surgery goes well and he does his celebratory dance move that became iconic. Seriously, I loved seeing it in the credits every week.
Best Snark - Peter Benton
Biggest Flirt - Doug Ross
Best Actor - Eriq LaSalle
Best Quotes -
1. Carol: “Something wrong?” Peter: “Oh you bet there is. We’re out of coffee again because the nurses have been taking it. That’s what’s wrong.” Carol: “Make some more.” Peter: “Make some more? We work 36 hours on, 18 off which makes 90 hours a week, 52 weeks a year and for that we are paid $23,739 before taxes and we also have to make our own coffee?” Carol: “My heart is breaking.”
2. Peter: “How do you take your coffee?” Susan: “Same as yesterday and the day before that.” Peter: “And they call me a smartass.”
3. Peter: "Do we have anyone to sew up?” Haleh: “How would I know?” Peter: “I love this great spirit of camaraderie. Everyone wants to help.”
4. Peter: “So you think you can save the hand?” Older surgeon: “Looks pretty good. I think so.” Peter: “Good. I told him you could so he’s counting on you.”
5. Dr. Morganstern: “The unit is looking to you, Mark. You set the tone.”
ER (1.2- 1.11)
BY Jessica VanWinkle
The first part of season one spends time developing the characters and we learn about their personal lives. Carol Hathaway survives her suicide attempt and reunites with her boyfriend, Tag, another doctor at County General. Doug is still interested in her, but she shuts him down. Mark’s wife, Jen, passes the bar in episode “Day One”, but takes a job in Milwaukee. The long distance takes a toll on their relationship and they hardly ever see each other. In “9 ½ Hours”, Mark calls in sick to spend the day with Jen. Doug has to take over Mark’s lead ER resident duties, and he definitely can’t keep up. He fails. Miserably. He ends up calling and begging Mark to come in and save him, but Mark won’t even answer his phone. Susan probably has the craziest personal life as her sister is a drug addict and steals from her. Her boyfriend, Div, is a psychiatrist at the hospital, but spirals out of control because of his depression. Peter doesn’t seem to have much of a life outside the hospital as he works as many surgeries as he can get. We do learn that his mother is sick and his brother-in-law resents Peter for not spending more time with her.
For the first few episodes nothing super exciting happens medicine wise, but there are some interesting patients. Dr. Benton treats Ivan, a Russian store worker who keeps getting shot. I think he is in three or four times with gunshot wounds. Doug has to take a boy away from his mother because she keeps having conversations with dead people and Princess Diana. Rosemary Clooney even shows up as an elderly woman with dementia. Carter has to learn how to do pretty much everything. I love watching Carter become more comfortable at procedures all while wanting to make his superiors proud. It is also heartbreaking watching him lose patients and have to deliver bad news to family members for the first time. In “ER Confidential” he treats a transgender woman, and he’s clearly uncomfortable with it. This was during 1994, and I had to remind myself that times were just different even in a big city like Chicago. The ER gets really exciting in “Blizzard.” The episode starts with the ER completely dead because of the huge snowstorm. The doctors have fun racing each other in wheelchairs and Nurse Malik raps over the P.A. System. The ER then gets slammed because of a multi-vehicle pileup. The ER is crazy as the doctors move frantically trying to treat patients and save lives. I love it!
My favorite episode of this bunch is “The Gift”. It is the Christmas episode, and I love those. Mark tries to buy a nice gift for his wife because he has to make up for the dust buster he purchased last year. He tries to leave the ER, but keeps getting called to see patients so Doug’s girlfriend volunteers to buy a present for her. She buys sexy lingerie so I’d say his wife is very happy at Christmas. Susan’s boyfriend resigns from the hospital and moves out without telling her. At first she’s upset, but Carter drives her back to her place and makes sure she’s okay. He is also her secret Santa, and his gift to her is a music box. So cute! I like the friendship that is slowly developing between Susan and Carter, and Noah Wyle is just adorable in these early episodes. At the end of the episode, Doug interrupts Carol’s Christmas party by telling her she belongs with him. This does not go well, and he ends up getting punched by Tag. Merry Christmas!
Grade: I’d give this group of episodes a B-. Some episodes were better than others. I’d give “The Gift” a B+.
Best Reason to Watch - The viewers learn more about the doctors’ lives.
Best Scene - The doctors eat pizza together, sing Christmas carols and unwind after a busy day in “Blizzard.”
Best Guest Star - Rosemary Clooney
Favorite Relationship - Carter and Susan
Most Relatable - Susan
Best Quotes -
1. Doug: “Where’s Benton?” Haleh: “Do I look like his travel agent?”
2. Peter: “Who died and left you Chief Resident?” Doug: “Mark’s got the flu. I’m covering.” Peter: “St. Mark’s out? Must be pneumonia.”
3. Peter: “Ivan’s back? Is he wearing a sign that says shoot me?”
4. Susan: “You know Carter, you can call us by our first names.” Carter: “You call me Carter.” Susan: “Yeah, well, that’s different. Somehow.”
5. Carter: “I met you on my first day.” Carol: “My last. Or so I thought.”
Nashville - 4.21 - Maybe You’ll Appreciate Me Someday
BY Jessica VanWinkle
I thought this finale was very well done (except for the huge cliffhanger, but I’ll get to that later). My favorite part of this episode was Rayna and Deacon. Those two, especially Rayna, fought for their daughter and finally convinced Maddie to come home. It took Maddie about five episodes too long to realize that her parents, not Cash, love her and want what’s best for her, but I’ll take what I can get. I loved the scene where Rayna, Deacon, Maddie, and Daphne went home together as a family. They were all happy for the first time in a long time. My other favorite part of this episode was Gunnar and Scarlett. I really thought that the cliffhanger would involve them, but luckily I was wrong. I could have done without Autumn Chase in this episode (she makes me cringe), but at least Gunnar realized he wanted to be with Scarlett. When he kissed her during their song, I was smiling from ear to ear. Will’s story was also wrapped up with him confronting the terrible Cynthia Davis on her show and reuniting with Kevin. Juliette told everyone the truth about Jeff’s death. I’m glad she went public and owned her mistakes; it shows how much she’s grown in these four seasons. I wish Layla had owned her mistakes, too, instead of lying to everyone, but at least her album is going to be successful. This episode was great, and then the writers had to ruin it with a stupid cliffhanger. Juliette’s plane probably crashed? Are you kidding me? Whatever. I’m just going to pretend that they found her plane, she was fine, and she had a happy reunion with Avery and her daughter.
Grade: B+
Status - cancelled
Best Reason to Watch - To see how all the stories end.
Best Scene - Rayna, Deacon, Maddie, and Daphne reunite and go home together.
Runner Up Best Scene - Gunnar kisses Scarlett as Autumn watches. The fact that she looked so bitter was just icing on the cake.
What I’ll Miss The Most - The music. All of these actors are so talented, and I will miss listening to their music every week.
Scene I Wish Hadn’t Happened - That cliffhanger. There’s an alternative ending, and I wish the writers had used that one. Hopefully they’ll release it at some point so the viewers can at least see it.
New Shows
Preacher - 1.01 - Pilot
I am often left with questions when I watch a pilot because I don't do a lot of spoilers, but this show left me wondering what it is even about. I know it's based on a graphic novel but I have zero idea what in the world just happened in this extra long opener. The beginning starts off with some seriously 60's-era CGI about outer space shenanigans before moving into the snail-slow pace of most AMC series with some random gore thrown in. Then it global hops for awhile with more blood. A crazy chick takes down a helicopter with soup cans and miscellaneous hardware supplies while snarking with kids. A demon (maybe) takes out an entire plane and then jumps. Some preacher drinks a lot, gets in a pretty awesome fight, and then is possessed by Predator. The sum of it all was…you got me. This TV show won't though unless I can make heads or tails out of it in the next episode.
Grade: C-
Ranking: 2
Audience - people who have read the graphic novel and therefore know what's going on
Best Reason to Watch - because you're missing your favorites from other comic-based shows (Agent Carter / SHIELD)
Best Scene - Tulip and the kids
Best Action - Preacher fights the Civil War singlehandedly
Best Pep Talk - the non-sermon
Worst Person to Give Advice - Tulip
Worst Rendition - that "Amazing Grace" choice is terrible
Biggest Huh - Someone married a pillow? Did I hear that right?
Biggest Ewww - I thought the demon with his intestines/tentacles (not sure which) hanging out all over the place was going to barely beat out the broken bone through the arm. But nope, it was definitely the open heart gift
Biggest Douche - Donnie
Least to Blame - that poor iPad that Emily destroyed in her frustration with Preacher
Least Likely to Clean Up After Herself - Tulip, who leaves a flaming helicopter and 2 dead guys on the lawn
Strangest Reference - they not only mention Tom Cruise but say he's been exploded at a Scientology meeting
Strangest Place for Confession - in the middle of an office with other people around
The "Welcome Back" Award - Dominic Cooper from Agent Carter and Captain America / Ruth Negga from SHIELD / Lucy Griffiths from Robin Hood
Best Quotes -
1. Preacher: "I heard Donnie there might be laying hands on his wife. I figured you might want to talk to her." Sheriff: "Well I'll listen to a formal complaint should the victim come forward." Preacher: "Well that's unlikely ain't it? These kind of situations, she's probably scared to." Sheriff: "I will listen to a formal complaint." Preacher: "Of course. You don't want to lose the wife-beatin', squirrel-murderin' redneck vote. I imagine that's a key demographic for you."
2. Preacher: "I don't hate you, Tulip. I wouldn't know how." Tulip: "Don't make me teach you then."
3. Preacher: "Drinkin', fightin', swearin'. I can't even afford to fix the damn air conditioning." Cassidy: "Sounds like the first verse of the worst country song ever written, man."
4. Preacher: "Promises matter. It's the currency of faith."
5. Eugene: "Do you ever think that there are some things so bad even God won't forgive?" Preacher: "No. No matter what you done, if you need him he has to be there for you. That's the whole point. God doesn't hold grudges."
Weekly Shows
The Big Bang Theory (9.22-9.24)
~I watched this in between marathoning Grandfathered and I found that I liked it better than normal. Sure the characters kept putting each other down for chuckles, but there was also real warmth and tension. Plus there was a return of some great characters. I always love when Mary is on the show. I'm not sure what to make of her hooking up with Leonard's dad though. It would be quite interesting if Leonard and Sheldon ended up being half-brothers. It was also nice to see Zach back. I kind of forgot about him until now but I like that he managed to insert some of his own barbs. It was a nice turnabout.
Grade: B+ / B / B
Status - renewed by CBS for season 10 on Thursdays (and Mondays, briefly)
Best Reason to Watch - the return of several guest characters
Best Scene - Leonard's toast to Penny
Best Subplot - Leonard following Howard, who thinks it's the military
Best Alliteration - fetus friendly festival of fun
Best Reference - Bon Jovi
Best Plan - milking Penny and Leonard's wedding for 2 episodes (3 if you count last season)
Best Use of Time - Penny and Sheldon making each other smarter at breakfast via flashcards
Best Product Placement - vitamin water
Best / Worst Job - being paid to stand in line for others
Biggest Appetite - apparently Raj is having a burger and chicken nuggets for dinner
Biggest Huh? - St. Louis has a 5 on Your Side section of the local news. Is this a thing across America?
Most Interesting - scratch and sniff wine book
Most Boring - Sheldon's night of fun
Most Surprising - The season finale just sort of ended. No rhyme, no reason, no sense of finishing. It was like time ran out so they packed everything up and went home.
Strangest Hook Up (maybe?) - Sheldon's mother with Leonard's dad
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Zack / Mary / Beverly
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Judd Hirsch from Forever and Numb3rs
Best Quotes -
1. Howard: "I can't believe I was so naïve. The military, it's just gonna take over the whole project and you know what happens if we object. We disappear like off the map…like every American Idol winner since season 4."
2. Alfred: "Oh, I didn't mean to disparage your faith. Actually I admire it." Mary: "Really?" Alfred: "Yes, I'm an agnostic myself but I have prayed many times to God to turn my wife into a pillar of salt." Mary: "Well he came close. Turned her into a giant block of ice."
3. Sheldon: "I like my grapes the old-fashioned way…in a juice box."
4. Howard: "You can put it in a satellite or rocket and it will run forever." Zach: "Could it be used for missiles and war stuff?" Howard: "Yeah but we didn't create it for weapons." Leonard: "And I doubt the military would be interested in our little guidance system." Zack: "Is it better than the one they use now?" Howard: "A lot." Leonard: "Oh way better." Zack: "Huh, you sure you guys are smart?"
5. Raj: "I do enjoy the complexity of an aged pinot noir." Leonard: "I'm sure that would pair nicely with your five nuggets of chicken."
6. Howard: "That's not how it works. You saw ET, Avatar, Jurassic World. The military just shows up and takes over." Bernadette: "You do realize those weren't documentaries, right?"
The Blacklist - 3.23 - Alexander Kirk (Conclusion)
The Blacklist had an amazing season. It gets my vote for one of the most improved shows of the year. Putting Liz on the run as a fugitive did wonders for the show. Writing in the actress' pregnancy was another stroke of genius. To be honest, I wasn't sure about either move but the writers ended up doing so much more with both. Who could forget the moment when the very pregnant Liz walks through a gun battle to get extra supplies? Best of all, Liz finally stopped playing the martyr and became a flesh and blood character, who realized her own flaws and faults in the situation. This was Elizabeth Keen at her best and I'm glad we got to see that. Still in the finale, Kaplan is definitely the star of the show. Her concern for all parties is real and so is her resolve even though she knows Reddington will probably kill her for orchestrating the biggest con in his life. I adore how she faked Liz's death and how she stood up to Red with her own version of what was best. Here's hoping you live to appear in more episodes, Kaplan, because you rock! So do you, writers, for giving us one heck of a season.
Grade: A-
Status - renewed by NBC for season 4 on Thursdays
Best Reason to Watch - Kaplan
Best Scene - Reddington tells Harold goodbye
Best Awww Moment - Tom, Agnes, and Elizabeth reunite
Best Action - Tom vs. the kidnapper
Best Character Interaction - Reddington and Kaplan
Best Reaction (normal people) - the cashier to Reddington taking so long to order
Best Reaction (psycho) - Reddington when he realizes Kaplan arranged to get Tom and Agnes out
Best Reveal - Mr. Kaplan's first name is Kate
Best Confirmation - I totally knew Mr. Kaplan arranged for Elizabeth to get out of the country. I knew she faked Liz's death. So glad that the family is reunited even if it's only for a little while.
Best Twist - Kirk is Elizabeth's father
Best Music - Dodged a Bullet by Greg Laswell
Biggest Crisis of Faith - Ressler over letting Red shoot Kirk or not
Least Professional - This team is seriously okay with letting Reddington murder someone with their full pre-knowledge of it. What the heck? They have been making terrible decisions this whole season.
Most Like Leverage - the crude oil truck exchange heist
Most Missed - Seeing Reddington's reaction to hearing that Liz is alive. How did they NOT show us this?
The "Say What?" Award - Red stopped midflight to catch Ressler up on the Liz news? Why?
Best Quotes -
1. Red: "It will have to suffice to say I would name every human being on the planet before you if asked who might betray me…" Kaplan: "Raymond." Red: "I know what you've done. I know you helped Tom and Agnes leave the country without my knowledge." Kaplan: "Yes." Red: "Yes." Kaplan: "What do you want to know, Raymond? If I'm sorry? Yes, I'm sorry you weren't more honest with Elizabeth from the beginning. I'm sorry you wanted to know her so desperately that you convinced yourself we could keep her safe. I couldn't sit back and watch you make the same mistake with Agnes. I didn't betray you. I did what I've always done, protected you. This time from yourself." Red: "You're wrong." Kaplan: "I won't tell you where they are." Red: "You don't understand, Kate. I know where they are and so does Alexander Kirk." Kaplan: "Kirk?" Red: "He was tracking Tom. He knows they're in Cuba. He's flying there as we speak." Kaplan: "No." Red: "I need an address. I know you had her best interest at heart, that you were trying to protect her, but now because of you, Agnes is in grave danger." Kaplan: "Not just Agnes."
2. Reddington: "You want justice for Elizabeth." Ressler: "Justice, not vengeance." Reddington: "In my experience, they're the same."
3. Navabi: "Are you alright?" Harold: "A man got off that plane and he has no idea that he'll be dead within the hour. I spent my entire life in the service of stopping people who do what we're about to let happen. Not so long ago this taskforce felt compelled to hunt down Elizabeth Keen for intentionally killing a man. Now she's gone and we're about to do the very same thing." Navabi: "If you're asking whether you'll regret it someday…no, I don't think you will. To be honest, I crossed that line a long time ago - killing in the name of justice, revenge. After awhile you don't just get over it. You get used to it." Harold: "That's what I'm afraid of."
4. Reddington: "I know how difficult this must be for you, Donald." Ressler: "I will do this." Reddington: "You have faith. I envy that. Justice, integrity, faith in humanity - nobody embodies those principles more than you, and I know it must be hard for you to believe that you'll continue to embody those principles even after you watch me do this."
5. Red: "Had it really come to that." Kaplan: "She loved her daughter that much. Yes, Raymond. It had come to that."
The Catch (1.06 -1.10)
~While I am glad that this series has been renewed despite disappointing ratings (all hail the power of Shonda), this would have been a good point in which to end it. I mean it really does have to end with Ben either in jail or dead. Otherwise it's a cop-out. I am glad that Margot is making it to another day, although I may actually miss Gangsta Mum - well if she stays jailed, but I'm still up in the air about Rhys. He's too stupid for my tastes and they seem to be trying to at least partly redeem psycho, which is all the rage these days. Let's just say that is rising on my TV Pet Peeves list. Overall I thought this season was decent. I liked the characters, except when I didn't. The new additions like Leah were a plus. Mostly though the cat and mouse game was what made this so much fun. Here's hoping that isn't lost in season 2.
Grade: B overall / C+ for finale
Status: renewed by ABC for season 2 at midseason
Best Reason to Watch - the cat and mouse game
Best Character Interaction - Alice and Margot
Best Addition - Leah
Best Blackmail - Valerie and Alice force the client to relinquish rights to his son in order to keep out of jail and not spend multimillions on legal fees
Best Revenge - Margot tips off the FBI about the stolen painting in Alice's house
Best Take Off of a Modern Story - Kelsey's basic slavery to her scumbag producer sounds a bit like Kesha
Best Party Organizer - Margot, who leaves no detail undone except for her brother
Best Negotiator - Leah Wells
Best Save - Valerie keeps Margot from shooting Alice
Best Move - Alice takes down Nathan
Best Plot Twist - Ben turns state's evidence to take down Rhys after Rhys threatens Alice
Worst Trade - the Benefactor (Rhys) is staying in town while Felicity is dead
Least Surprising - her brother is the one sending threats to Captain Nia / Margot is Alice's new therapist / Ben trades himself for Alice
Most Fascinating Character - Margot, who is both smart and vicious
Most Likely to be Shafted - Reggie, who is 100% right in not wanting to work for Rhys again and doubly correct in thinking that going after Rhys is a bad idea
Most in Need of Jail Time - Rhys
Most Sleazy - Nathan Ashmore
Most Extreme Reaction - Alice dumps her phone in a vase instead of just turning it off
Most in Need of Chapstick - Alice
Most Talented - Sophie, who has a great voice to go with her impressive computer skills
Biggest Idiot - Alice for not taking the threat of other thieves seriously / Rhys for not checking Alice's purse
Biggest Baby - Rhys, who calls his mom on his sister
The "We So Don't Have Time for This" Award - Why have we stopped for 20 minutes to wrap up every single romantic plotline on this show and some that weren't even a romantic plotline until this episode? There are killers on the loose and a heist taking place. Priorities people!
The "Give Me a Break" Award - There is zero way Mum would hand off a job to Ben, no matter how small, and NOT have him tailed to make sure he was doing it. Seriously, she runs a criminal empire. She didn't get there by being stupid.
The "Learn Something New" Award - A woman on Facebook launched a campaign for people to put a black dot on their palm to signal that they are in trouble but it’s too dangerous for them to ask for help. Current specialists don't suggest this idea because an abuser might know what it means too.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Adina Porter from The 100 / Vik Sahay from Chuck / Kevin Alejandro from Arrow and The Returned / Nia Vardalos from My Big Fat Greek Wedding / Mimi Kennedy from Homefront and Mom
Best Quotes -
1. Margot's Mum: "Do you know what your problem is?" Margot: "Bad parenting."
2. Mum: "Turns out it costs an actual fortune to make a fake one."
3. Sophie: "Did you ever run away from home?" Danny: "Well if you ask my mom, she'd say that's what I'm doing right now."
4. Mum: "Do you want to know the secret to a good relationship?" Margot: "Oh this will be good, coming from the woman whose husband killed himself." Mom: "Your father didn't kill himself. He was murdered." Margot: "I assume you know that because you murdered him."
5. Rhys: "This is going to be the end of me." Ben: "Don't get my hopes up."
6. Rhys: "You are the absolute worst. You know that. Most people have sisters who love them, support them." Margot: "Most people don't have you for a brother."
7. Rhys: "Paul McCartney? I could probably get Ringo in a push. He owes me a favor, but I can't get Paul McCartney. I can't even get decent tickets for Paul McCartney." Ben: "She's not talking about THE Paul McCartney. She's talking about her dog." Reggie: "She named her dog Paul McCartney?" Ben: "She did." Rhys: "She is mental." Ben: "I got that feeling."
8. Reggie: "Clearly professionalism, that is a recessive gene in your family."
Crowded - 1.13 - Come Back
I probably would have liked this one better if I hadn't just watched the Goldbergs give into their kids over and over again. It is canon that these girls lived on their own in college so I'm not buying that they can't even make themselves coffee. Right now they are the worst kind of leeches and they ruined the episode for me. If it had just been the adults, I would have really enjoyed this one. Alice defending her territory was hilarious, while the scene between Bob and Mike was touching and very much needed. I like how Bob is man enough to admit that not everything was Linda's fault too. This show is now cancelled and I'm okay with that, but I think it would have been stronger without the girls at all. They could have stayed at college and the whole show wouldn't have been such an eye roller at times.
Grade: C+
Status - cancelled
Best Reason to Watch - Bob and Mike
Best Scene - Bob talks to Mike about his mom and tells Mike that he loves him
Best Example of Why Punctuation Matters - Alice: "Shoot, my sister Rhonda." Bob: "Shoot your sister, Rhonda. I'll do it."
Biggest Hmmm - Correct me if I'm wrong, but both of these girls lived away from their parents in college. How is it possible that they don't know how to fend for themselves for 15 minutes? Urgh, this makes no sense.
Worst Parent - Mike's mom, who compounds it by saying she's dying when she really isn't
Worst Moral - Loving your children means giving into them in everything. What is this, The Goldbergs?
Most Ridiculous Fight - Are they seriously fighting over what a shower sounds like?
Most Embarrassing - listening to your mom talk about your dad's penis
Most Likely to Throw Down - Alice
Most Pathetic - even with Mike's mom back in the episode, it's still the girls
The "I'm with You" Award - Bob, I feel your spider hate and I agree with it all. They are Satan's creatures.
Best Quotes -
1. Bob: "Look, don't tell anyone I said this but I love you.." Mike: "I will keep it a secret that my father loves me." Bob: "Well, you got something to say back?" Mike: "I love you too, dad." Bob: "We don't have to hug now, do we?" Mike: "Well if we didn't do it when the Seahawks won the Super Bowl, why would we do it now?"
2. Bob: "I hate those creepy, crawly little b**. Ulghhh. Four legs I'll give you. Six, alright you're a bug. Eight legs, ylgh, that's a devil creature."
3. Shea: "Wait, it sounds like it's coming from the basement. Shouldn't we just go check it out?" Stella: "What do we always yell at the people in horror movies right before they get murdered? 'Don't go see what the scary noise is. The killer's in there. Get out of the house.' Sure you're the nerdy virgin who lives in the end, but I'm the sexy, popular girl who gets an axe in the forehead."
4. Martina: "I don't think we coddled them." Mike: "Look at us right now. We're whispering so as not to wake up our daughter who's passed out on a counter reeking of gin." Martina: "I think it might be rum." Mike: "Yeah, let's argue about that."
5. Linda: "And maybe in time I could even be friends with Bob and Alice." Alice: "Nope."
The Flash - 2.23 - The Race of His Life
~I've come to the conclusion that I like The Flash best in its normal episodes. The big event episodes always fall flat for me, this one included. The time jumps, the parallel earths, urgh - can't they just tell their story without trying to go so big that it doesn't make sense? Time to scale it back - except they just pulled a Fringe. My favorite thing about that series was the Walter-Peter relationship. It was very difficult for me to watch the show when Peter was erased from the universe and Walter no longer knew him. On The Flash, my favorite part is the Joe-Barry relationship and then the team vibe. Without Barry going to live with Joe as a child, all that is screwed to Hades. Would he be a forensic scientist without his mom's death? Would he even stay in Central City to get zapped by the particle accelerator? Plus the whole thing causes such a big time paradox that it literally causes my brain to ache. Ugh. Just give me a one-off metahuman bad guy, some great teamwork, and some Cisco banter. That's all I need to be happy.
Grade: C
Status - renewed by The CW for season 3 on Tuesdays
Best Reason to Watch - the ending is sure going to shake things up until the speed force (or something else) makes Barry change it back / Zoom is hopefully gone for good
Best Speech - Joe's eulogy for Henry
Best Shock - the real Jay Garrick is Henry's doppelganger
Best Reason to Lock Up Those with Superpowers - even the good guys screw everything up
Best Meta - John Wesley Shipp, back in the suit
Best Plan (for me) - Jesse going back to Earth 2
Best Plan (logically until it wasn't) - locking up Barry until they have an actual working plan
Worst Plan - messing up the timeline
Worst Plan (for me) - Wells leaving for Earth 2
Biggest Diss - Cisco on the Transformers movies and their actors
Least Surprising - the will they-won't they continues, or at least it will when Barry is forced to put the timeline back to normal
Most Moronic End Game - this is all about a speed race to save the earth
Cheesiest Acting - Teddy Sears, who granted has the cheesiest dialogue on the planet to say, but he's still not selling it at all
The "Don't Even Ask" Award - Give it up, Wally. I am firmly convinced that nothing about this time stuff makes a lick of sense. Trying to use logic on it is a waste of time.
The "Say What" Award - Why is Barry racing Zoom? He's giving Zoom exactly what he wants and what makes Barry think Zoom is going to keep his word? This is stupid.
The "Give Me a Break" Award - Now there are 2 Zooms? A Zoom and his evil remnant? A partridge in a pear tree? This parallel world thing is annoying. Please close all breaches. We have enough trouble on this planet alone.
The "Wow, This is Exciting" Award - watching Barry and Zoom run around the carnival ride is a lot like watching NASCAR
Best Quotes -
1. Cisco: "We also have to figure out why I keep vibe-ing Earth 2 being ripped to shreds." Joe: "Seriously." Cisco: "It's like I'm watching Transformers in 4-D but like 10 times more realistic and with much better acting."
2. Zoom: "But if at any point you decide you don't want to race anymore, dear old dad #2 is a dead man as well as your little fan club." Barry: "They're not my fan club. They're the reason that I'm running, why I'm going to beat you."
3. Wells: "Have you ever worked with a tool before?" Cisco: "I'm working with one now."
4. Barry: "Right after he killed his time remnant, he told me I was almost ready." Iris: "Almost ready for what?" Barry: "I don't know." Cisco: "Yep, classic psychopath. Why can't they ever just say what they want to do?"
5. Wells (to Barry): "I'm a better man than I was when I got here. That's because of you." Barry: "I'm not the same either."
Fresh Off the Boat - 2.24 - Bring the Pain
~I didn't find this episode very funny but it might be because I don't find Kim Jeong very funny. It did have lots of heart though and good back story.
Grade: B-
Status - renewed by ABC for season 3 on Tuesdays
Best Reason to Watch - back story
Best Speech - Eddie to his brothers, even though it was to get his way
Worst Plan - burning your jacket
Least Missed - VHS tapes
Most Missed - We don't get to see the Huang's in Taiwan. Bummer.
Most Excited - Jessica when she hears that Gene took Grandma back to Taiwan…right until she hears that it's only until the wedding's over
Biggest Perv - Honey's brother-in-law
The "You Learn Something New" Award - I've never heard of a polite fight but I've seen them in my own family for years, especially when it comes to paying at meals
The "Welcome Back" Award - Kim Jeong from Community and Dr. Ken
Best Quotes -
1. Jessica: "If you hadn't come here, we never would have met. I don't regret the decision you made. You have nothing to apologize for." Louis: "Thank you." Jessica: "Unless you want to set a good example for the boys." Louis: "Ugh. I hate being an adult."
2. Jessica: "In Chinese families, no one likes to owe anyone anything. It's like how you must have felt when you kept my Tupperware for too long." Honey: "That's actually my Tupperware and you still have them." Jessica: "And if you were Chinese, I would feel bad about that."
3. Louis: "What's that on your face?" Jessica: "What?" Louis: "You're smiling." Jessica: "I am. I'm happy. I can't just be happy for no reason?" Louis: "We both know you can't."
4. Eddie: "Dad, I thought you didn't want Uncle Gene to come visit." Louis: "I don't, son, but I'm setting an example for you boys. It's called being an adult. You have to do stuff you don't want to do, all the time."
5. Eddie: "It's a Chinese polite fight. You're never supposed to give in. These things can get hella intense."
The Goldbergs (3.22 -3.24)
I love The Goldbergs. It's my favorite comedy and has been for 3 years. I may get tired of the sudden preaching of bratty kids getting their way, which seems to have become the theme in the last 2 seasons, but there's no one that gets the combination of heart and laughs mixed just right like Adam Goldberg. Every episode I laugh. Every episode I "awww." I am so happy that this show has found the audience it deserves after being overshadowed in the first season. Murray remains my favorite character. In this set, I especially loved his interactions with Beverly. He knows her so well and even if he doesn't always show it, he gets why seeing their kids grow up is so traumatic to her. I love that Murray is her support even in the craziest of times. The siblings, when it is about their relationship with each other, had some great moments in here too. That slip and slide / sprinkler prank was epic and I kind of wish someone had thought of that when I was in school. Of course, we celebrated the end of 8th grade with a dance and not a graduation ceremony. That's more of a 00's thing. I am, though, scared for the Goldberg siblings now that Beverly wants to be a teacher. Actually, I feel sorry for that whole high school.
~Condolences out to Patton Oswalt, whose wife died last month. Also to their daughter. How very sad to lose someone so suddenly.
Grade: C / B / A-
Status - renewed by ABC for season 4 on Wednesdays
Best Reason to Watch - the relationships
Best Scene - Murray and Pops try to pry a baby blanket out of Beverly's hands / slip-n-slide
Best Moment - the principal calls Beverly into his office and suspends her from parenting
Best Revenge - Beverly takes away all of Barry and Erica's stuff until they are more appreciative of her
Best Relationship - Murray and the dog
Best Music - Heat of the Moment
Best Reference - Scooby-Doo / Pretty in Pink
Worst Reference - high school bullying
Worst Twist - the sudden love triangle at the end
Worst Message - Giving your kids everything they want, especially after they brat about it, does not equal being a good parent. If Adam wanted this so badly, a better parenting plan would have been to make him earn the money himself. I am really hating the way this season seems to be all about giving the kids whatever they want, when they want, even after they've been spoiled brats about it. We have enough of that in this world already. We don't need for comedies to imply that parents are wrong when they don't give into their kids all the time.
Worst Kids - Erica and Barry for forgetting Mothers' Day
Biggest Huh - How does Adam take down Barry? That just doesn't seem possible.
Biggest Meltdown - Barry over his shirt
Biggest Brats - all the kids, who keep getting more obnoxious each season
Biggest Idiot - Barry, who believes Adam's summer solstice strength tale
Biggest Surprise - Murray is a decent ventriloquist
Biggest Say What? - A shirt funeral? Huh?
Biggest Laugh - playing Whitney Houston's "I Believe the Children are Our Future" while Barry and Erica literally play out the home disaster scene from Freaky Friday
Least Surprising - they plan to make another tree house
Most Fun - the sprinkler and slip-n-slide at graduation practice
Most Sucky - When your little brother is big enough to fight back. I feel for you, Barry. I experienced this time too in my life.
Strangest Show of Love - Barry chose to haze Adam to keep him from being pegged as a dork in high school because no one cared enough to torture him
Truest Statement - Voiceover: "There were only 2 days left until summer and that meant 1 thing - nobody cared." That is every last week of school I've ever been in, as a student or teacher
Weirdest Saying - face mouth
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Pop-Pop
Best Quotes (Funny) -
1. Beverly: "You're not athletic enough to get athlete's foot."
2. Erica: "What about your experience with me makes you think I'm going to care about this conversation at all?"
3. Adam: "Come on. Put yourself in my shoes. Think back to when you were a kid. You know, pushing a hoop with a stick on the way to the old fishing hole." Murray: "How old do you think I am?"
4. Murray: "Wow, of all the moron things my moron kids have ever asked for this takes the cake." Adam: "Dad, this is my dream." Murray: "You're literally asking me for a spaceship."
5. Pops: "Wait, that's what this is -a shirt funeral? Damn it, I missed a real funeral for this."
6. Adam: "Wasn't that the most amazing movie you've ever seen?" Dave Kim: "Uh, a bunch of kids getting accidentally launched into space. That's asking a lot of the audience."
Best Quotes (serious) -
1. Adam: "Do you even hear yourself? You're just as bad as Pop-Pop. He crushed all your dreams and now you're crushing mine." Murray: "I am nothing like him. Have I ever left you hungry? Did you ever have to walk home 5 miles in the rain from school? Have you ever cried yourself to sleep because you didn't know if I was coming home or not?" Adam: "Dad, I didn't know that." Murray: "Well there's a lot you don't know."
2. Murray: "Look, I know how hard this is for you. I do." Beverly: "They're more than my world, Murray. They're my life. If I'm not Mama, what am I?" Murray: "Well that's up to you."
3. Pops: "What did you do to the boy? He's trying to murder that garbage can." Adam: "This isn't my fault. Did Barry seriously think I'd be a nerdy little brother forever?" Pops: "Actually, yes." Adam: "Look at me. I'm getting older and bigger. Things change." Pops: "Well no matter how big you get, you're always going to be Barry's little brother and that means a lot to him." Adam: "He sure doesn't act like it." Pops: "Trust me, he loves being your big brother. It's a huge part of who he is and without that, he's just not the same."
4. Beverly: "Unbelievable. I give you my everything 364 days of the year. Is it too much to ask to have one day when you do something for me?"
5. Laney: "I don't get it. Your mom's amazing. Her pancakes have these crispy edges." Erica: "It gets old real quick. You're not here. You don't know." Laney: "I'm actually around a lot. I'm literally here right now. Look, I know she can be intense but if you guys want your stuff back, you've got to step up in a big way."
Heartbeat (1.06-1.08)
~Jesse and Alex hooking up is a deal breaker for me so instead of watching until the end, I'm quitting at episode 1.08 and wishing I had never seen this episode. I do not know why cheating partners and endless love triangles are Hollywood's version of good TV. It's old, it's boring, and it just ruined this show.
Grade: B- / B / F
Status - cancelled and I am good with that
Best Reason to Fast Forward - Shane's declaration - again - of his feelings
Best Scene - Millicent tells Alex to drug the patient and do the surgery without his consent
Best Speech - Gloria to her father
Best Ride - Alex rents a Delorean
Best Twist - Pierce got th