Welcome back to a double episode, let's just call it superhero sized edition, of Last Week in TV. I apologize for not posting last week but I had a family emergency that prevented me from spending time on it. As a result, this episode is stuffed to the gills with your favorite shows. As always, thanks to our guest reviewers for helping round it out. Thanks also to everyone nominating shows. Please remember that I will only review one nominated episode of a show per season so there is no need to nominate Nashville, NCIS, The Americans, or The Vampire Diaries, which was this week's episode. I also will not review any show our guest reviewers are covering because they are already doing a great job with those shows. This week's randomly picked, nominated show will be Jane the Virgin. If you have a show you'd like reviewed, fill in the short, 2 question form below. Until then, happy TV viewing and don't forget to leave your episode awards in the comments.
Nominated Episode
The Vampire Diaries - 7.02 - Never Let Me Go
While I devoured all things L. J. Smith as a kid, I never really tried The Vampire Diaries as a TV show until I found SpoilerTV. Determined to give the show a fair shake back then, I watched the entire first season. While it was better than its detractors said (it's no washed out Twilight, that's for sure) and I loved the pacing, I'm just not into supernatural romance and I really, really hate love triangles. Thus I approached this nomination with only 1 season of information and that is definitely NOT enough. Many, many thanks to Nakia who answered all my important questions like "Who's that guy and where did he come from?" In the end though, I just rolled with my ignorance and desperately tried to figure out which crazy said which great line. And there were some fantastically snarky lines.
The gist is the long-lost Salvatore matriarch is back from the grave and way too psycho to be dressing herself much less kicking out an entire town so she can create a home for her new family at the expense of her old one. I'm guessing Thanksgiving is loads of fun for the Salvatores. Witch Bonnie isn't excited about her new neighbors so she and Damon kill his new half brother and Mama is ticked so she kidnaps Caroline and sends Elena to a watery grave…er, bed…er, never mind. That whole thing is way too confusing. As is Alaric, who has his lady love's corpse on ice. Cause nothing says love like resurrecting your autopsied fiancé with a stone from hell. Maybe literally. I'm sure this will end up being a stellar plan with absolutely no horrifyingly catastrophic consequences like all those other shows where resurrection ended up being the best plan. Um, I'm sure there's one show like that, right?
In the end though, the pacing is the star of this episode. No parts drag and while the relationships were all confusing, each character had a chance to shine. I may not have understood the motives, but it was crystal clear what everyone's end game was and where they were heading. Well except the end. I have no idea who is shooting Caroline in the end. One point I still need clarified though. This whole thing boils down to a nasty property dispute in which the prize is Mystic Falls. I'm still not sure why anyone would want Mystic Falls to be honest. It's like living on the Hellmouth with extra juicy drama. When your murder rate triples Detroit, perhaps it's better for everyone to move out. Keep the nifty vampire rings and move to Miami.
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - the pacing
Best Scene - Caroline laughs at the psycho sister's Victorian dress
Best Character - Valerie
Most Improved - Caroline
Least Improved - Damon, who seems to be pining over Elena and not near as snarky
Best Back Story - Lily's style of punishment when Damon and Stefan were kids
Best Tool - EMF…but only with rock salt and lead and holy water. Forget it. Just bring the Winchesters.
Biggest Fighter - Bonnie, who is taking back the town one heartless witch at a time
Biggest Huh? - So if I'm getting this right, there's a flash forward (confusing in its own right) and no one's living in Mystic Falls anymore because the witches took over? And Elena's dead/not dead in a Sleeping Beauty spell? And there's no love triangle? So most importantly, who are these people in the IMDb photo? I don't recognize any of them. What a difference 6 seasons have made!
Possibly Worst Plan Ever - letting a witch kill you so your ex can be rescued from witch vampires
The "Nope, Sorry. I Was Wrong" Award - keeping the frozen corpse of your fiancé is the worst plan ever and the worst literal interpretation of fridging someone
Most Annoying - the heretics
Most Petty? - Unless there is something special about Mystic Falls (and in 6 years there may certainly be), it seems awfully petty of Lily to move her new family into her old family's place to rub their nose in it. That's completely childish when there's a perfectly good Hellmouth in need of some crazy further west. Still someone who steals children's toys to get what they want seems a bit too unhinged to be mom to one family, much less two. Time for you to die…for real this time.
Most Awesome - Caroline has become a fighter, takes down Enzo, and frees herself - well temporarily
Least Likely to be a Deterrent - Alaric tells his students there's nothing to see in Mystic Falls but they have to know 10 people died there recently. Social media ensures it. Let the dumb ones flock, call it Darwinism, and be done.
Least Surprising - Alaric doesn't destroy the magic rock. Bonnie, unless you see it dissolve yourself, it's not happening.
Biggest Surprise - Caroline staked at the end
The "Stop Talking and Get Fleeing" Award - I have no idea why characters feel the need to talk when they first see their incarcerated love one. Get them out. Then chat.
The "That's Just Cold" Award - Lily desecrating a grave
Best Quotes -
1. Bonnie: "He wants to bring Jo back to life with a stone that's filled with evil incarnate." Damon: "Yep, sounds about right. So about how long do we have before this evil engulfs the world? Just trying to plan my week."
2. Matt: "So Damon screws up, Caroline gets grabbed, and I end up dead. Doesn't it ever feel like we're fighting the wrong enemy?"
3. Stefan: "Can I help you? It's okay. I speak mute. Just communicate what you want with a series of grunts."
4. Enzo: "So I should condone someone I care about being tortured?" Valerie: "No, you should just stop caring about her."
5. Mary Louise: "Why the hell are you in here?" Valerie: "Just looking for this. See I heard of this new fashion trend called Hooker Chic. I figured you'd have something. Thanks."
Episode of the Week
The Blacklist - 3.06 - Sir Crispin Crandall
I feel like I keep repeating myself but I can't believe how much better this season of The Blacklist is compared to the first two. I liked this show before but it's must-watch TV now. This was another superb episode with good pacing, interesting philosophy, and more kick butt if sociopathic Tom Keene than one episode should be able to hold. I love when Reddington goes toe-to-toe with the Director and I find a perverse thrill at seeing the Director backed into a corner. Tonight's cat and mouse game had a great twist in that Reddington was not attacking the cabal as a whole but instead specifically targeted the Director, taking away his nest egg and holding proof that he's betraying the cabal by skimming the till. When you add the Leverage-ish shenanigans to get to the safety deposit box first, this is a topnotch episode. Another reason it resonates is because we have spent so much time delving into Liz's feelings about her precarious situation, but this episode instead focuses on Reddington. That made it more action-oriented and gave James Spader another mesmerizing speech to deliver. I like how he stuck it to the cryogenic crazy but then turned around and shot him to expedite the story. Plus, I find Tom Keene endlessly fascinating so the more of him the better in my opinion. It feels like everything is coming to a head and for once Red and Liz are on top. I can't wait to see them crush the cabal.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch - the pacing
Best Scene / Best Speech - Red tells off Mr. CrazyBillionairePants
Best Gotcha - Red to the Director
Best Action - everything with Tom
Best Plan - Red controlled the entire board here, but his best move was to buy the woman a restaurant and force the inspector to work his plan
Most Confident - Tom Keene
Most Needing to Die - the Director
Most Over His Head - You'd think this would be the Director but actually it's Harold, who apparently expected Tom to play by FBI rules when he involved him in clearing Liz's name. How's that working out for you, Harold?
Most Barbaric - fight to the death sporting
The "Well He Warned You" Award - Generic Russian Bad Guy, Tom did tell you exactly how he was going to take down your crew. You really should have been able to defend yourself better.
The "Sometimes It Pays to be Dumb" Award - nothing like being kidnapped and offed for cold storage because you are the top of your field
Best Music - Radar Love by Golden Earring, which I love by the way
Best Quotes -
1. Red: "It's a novel theory, Donald, but like all novels, it's fiction."
2. Red: "No matter how many poor souls you turn into popsicles, the fix is in. The world in which you awaken will be one incapable of sustaining human life and why? Because at the critical tipping point, one tragically quixotic megalomaniac cannibalized humanity of the very minds that might have been its salvation. You see if you were a betting man, you would understand that now trumps later every time. The future is a sucker's bet, a maybe, a contingency, a what if. The only thing that is real is the present and you've plundered it, robbed it of the very geniuses that might have averted the dystopia that you so fear. Indeed perhaps even the very one who might have devised a means to revive your sad, tired, frozen a**. Congratulations Crispin, you've doubled down on extinction."
3. Red: "I'm gonna bring this whole damn thing down on you, Peter, and when I do, your own people will beg me to kill you to stop the bleeding."
4. Kerikar: "Who the hell are you?" Tom: "I'm the guy who's taking you back to DC to admit that you framed my wife for murder."
5. Red: "Dead? Pish posh, what's death? It's just a process, right?"
Quantico - 1.07 - Go
This was the best episode of Quantico yet. I like how both stories were on a timer and it increased my interest in both of them because of it. I also like how the team is becoming more congealed in the fast forward as well. It's bound to be a mistake because someone is going to betray their trust but I think one of the reasons why I tend to like the training parts better is because there is more character interaction in them. Now both parts give me that and it's improved the narrative. I especially like how blindsided I was that Natalie is basically Team Alex now too. Talk about a twist. That's bigger than finding out there's another bomb out there. I figured that was a given. Does no one watch 24? I also like how Shaw let everyone in on the secret of the twins. The reactions were great and Raina made a good point about having to trust each other and that meant they couldn't have these big secrets. Now I'm sure there are still big secrets to go for all of these characters and we still don't know why Simon supposedly got kicked out, but it made for the most honest speech in the show.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch - the great teamwork, both in training and in the flash forward
Best Scene - disarming the bomb
Best Reaction - the class to learning about the twins
Best Shock - Natalie allows Alex and Booth to leave
Biggest Shock - Booth turns down a reinstatement and Caleb gets back into the field agent program
Biggest Girl Scout - Alex trades info to try to get Booth's job back
Biggest Boy Scout - Booth (along with Shelby and Simon) puts his job on the line to help prove Alex was framed
Biggest What the Heck? - Why are TV terrorists always watching cartoons?
Biggest Face Palm - Do none of these specially trained people ever gauge their surroundings and the situation before sticking their foot in their own mouth. First it was O'Connor. Now it's Shelby.
Biggest Douche - guess Caleb comes by it honestly because his dad's an even bigger douche than he is
Biggest Adios - Goodbye, Elias. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. Oh, and I don't need to see your creepy stalker ways anymore.
Least Surprising - there's another target
Best Quotes -
1. Elias: "This is feeling less like an exam and more like the last 10 minutes of Saw."
2. Raina: "Interesting how someone who's wrongly accused finds it so easy to point the finger. She's innocent."
3. Natalie: "Go. Go now. Go."
4. Shelby: "I really want to pray right now but the only thing I can think of are Joan Osborne lyrics." Simon: "I know about 4 songs from Pippin. Maybe it's the Fantasticks." Caleb: "You know I think we're more okay with dying than hearing you sing."
5. Natalie: "Fletcher's not crazy, okay? If he was, I'd be having way more fun."
Guest Reviews
Chicago Fire - 4.05 - Regarding This Wedding
BY Toni
I was happy that they didn't just sweep Dawson's miscarriage away as if it didn't happen. I liked it opening up with her talking to the chaplain. It was sad but it was a great scene. Riddle is such a douchebag. There is no way he made it this far without someone punching him in the face several times. I don't know how he can "personally verify" someone as fit for duty when he's barely verified as a human being. I don't know how many times I called him a !*?! in this episode. He and Patterson can go kick rocks together, but I love Boden. I love Boden when he's angry and when he's protecting his firehouse. He is really the "father" of that family. I am sick of Severide being kicked around every time he turns around. The so-called authority figures always have a problem with him and at this point, I'm a little tired of it being used as a plot point. Get new material. He's dedicated, hard working and respected by his peers and subordinates. It doesn't look good to keep harassing him over silly cr**. I need him to be bada** Severide and shut these idiots down. He needs to start fighting back, harder. I also want to see more of Casey and Severide working together to save a victim. They're at their best. I really want to like Chili but I just don't. I don't know if it's the actress or the character but I didn't like her character on Friday Night Lights either. I'm hoping she'll grow on me because they seem to be pushing her towards Jimmy. I really liked this episode and where the season is headed. I think they're balancing the cast out better and it shows. Molly's may be my favorite bar since Cheers. I love the look of it and the feel it gives off. If I ever quit my day job to own a bar, I'll totally steal ideas from Molly.
Grade: B
Most Surprising - How much I am enjoying Jimmy. I really like this kid. He has a lot of heart, work ethic and he knows how to have fun.
2nd Most Surprising - Patterson helped Sylvie with the wedding song (I still don't like him)
Best Head to Head - Boden and Riddle. I think Riddle is underestimating Chief and he looks unhinged.
Best Scene- The firehouse wedding
Best Performance-Sylvie's wedding song.
Worst Scene-It's just a pet peeve but the fiancé was literally JUST brought into the ER and the first question the bride asks the doctor is when he'll be discharged. He hasn't even examined the patient yet.
Biggest WTH - The BDSM scene. It's so overdone at this point. Is anyone surprised when they see a man and woman with collars, whips, chains and generic Viagra? Nope. Not even surprised when they're married to other people either.
So Adorable - Steve McQueen's smile. I did not like him on The Vampire Diaries but as Jimmy, he is really caring and charming. He has a smile that lights up the firehouse. I'm just surprised and I like that.
Biggest Middle Finger - Patterson taking credit for the wedding as a human interest story. He is really going to regret crossing Boden and Severide sooner or later and I can't wait to see it. It's going to be beautiful. Sucker.
Best Quotes:
1. Boden - "We are having the wedding here. I'll be damned if Chief Riddle or anyone else is going to change my way of running this house. He wants to fight, then lets fight."
2. Connie - "Oh and Chief? What you're doing here, with this wedding? Not the smartest move you ever made."
3. Boden -"Better to die on your feet than live on your knees Connie."
4. Herrmann- "Heads up. It's the Riddler."
5. Severide - "To hell with him. He was never going to give me my bugle back anyway. Shove it up his a**, Chief."
6. Severide - "There's one thing that's become crystal clear in all of this. It's either him or me. I'm not going anywhere"
Chicago PD - 3.07 - A Dead Kid, A Notebook and a lot of Maybe's
BY Toni
This episode was hard for me. I hate TV shows that touch on the subjects of school violence, bully behavior and molestation. Not because I don't think they deserve to be talked about but because I get so angry. Anyway, I thought it was one of CPD's best episodes. In the beginning, I was sure it was another school shooting story but they switched it up and if us watching didn't suspect the coach from the very beginning, we need to turn in our TV viewer cards. I say that because I didn't. I'm not sure how I feel about Alvin and Michelle. For such a strong cop, Alvin is coming off as pretty passive and weak. I don't like it. I understand she may be his daughter. Since he trashed the DNA test, it seems he's sure she is or doesn't care. He's claiming her. That's great but there really should have been more of a discussion with his other daughter. This could have been a strong family story. It still might happen. Atwater's sudden insecurity at the beginning of the episode was so out of nowhere for me, I didn't like it at all. He seemed hesitant, almost stuttering in his attempt to talk to the Captain. I was disappointed. If it was just a set up to the end, it could have been done differently. AHHH, Burgess and Ruzek. I don't like them. I never have. I like Burgess on her own and I actually love her relationship with Roman. She and Ruzek bore me so much. If she has to pull childish tricks to see where his head is at, her head is not in the right place either. Be a woman. Flat out ask him what you want to know. This episode belonged to Halstead though. He was so good with Ethan. I teared up a few times. The kid broke my heart. I hate it. I hate to see it but CPD handled it really well. Halstead was patient, understanding and he didn't push the kid. He was just there for him, giving him strength.
Grade - B+
Best Performance- Ethan. This young actor was really good for this story. I felt his pain. I wanted to find that coach myself.
Best Character - Halstead. He and Ethan played so well off of each other.
Best scene - The end scene of Ethan and Halstead. Ethan had hope again. That's all these kids need. Hope for better.
Most Fun scene - Voight going all in on Coach Sanders. I kept waiting for him to explode but he held back. I wish he hadn't.
Most Surprising - Atwater gets a strange invite that turns out to be an in to Captain Whitikar and Chief Boden's poker game. Loved it.
Biggest You Need A Reality Check - Ethan's mother. There was something so off with her, I thought she may be involved. Sadly, she was just confused. Very odd acting or writing for her.
Biggest I Hope You Make Friends in Prison - Coach Sanders
Character I Love to Watch - Mouse. He is just fun and smart. When it counts, he is on it.
Best Unusual Interaction - Erin and Atwater. I like it. There should be more character interactions than what we have. It's a great ensemble that we should see more of.
Best Quotes -
Halstead: “I’ve known some heroes. But what you did, going public…it might just be the bravest thing I’ve ever seen.”
Captain Whitikar: "Atwater, you just made 2 mistakes. Our shared skin color is irrelevant to me. Good police is good police. Secondly, I get one half hour of peace each day by myself, which is breakfast. You have disturbed that."
Kirby: "It's initiation. It happens to everybody but Ethan went nuts. He came after me with a fire extinguisher. I swear, he was trying to kill me." Atwater: "By extinguishing you?"
Criminal Minds – 11.06 – Pariahville
BY Emma
I’m not sure if it’s just me but it seems that the Criminal Minds production team is getting more creative with letting music instead of dialogue tell the story. A few weeks ago, my favorite scene was a closing montage set to the perfect song. This week, the cold open takes a turn and was again my favorite scene of the episode. I hope to see more of this in future episodes! After 11 seasons, procedurals tend to get a bit monotonous but with unique COTW story lines and/or locations and differing ways of telling the narrative, this season has been able to keep my interest from week to week with no problem. Also on deck this week was a bit of character development for our newest BAU member. We saw Lewis’ fist kill in the line of duty tonight. It left her shaken but determined, almost turning down a new promotion. Aisha Tyler has always been billed as recurring or guest so I was wondering how they were going to explain her absence from cases throughout the season. I’m glad the writers chose to go the promotion route and that they didn’t use her first kill to justify her going back to interviewing after the fact. I’m looking forward to seeing more of Dr Lewis – especially her interactions with the full team when JJ returns next episode.
Grade: B (docked a few points as no mention of the Dirty Dozen again)
Best Reason to Watch – murder takes place in a community entirely made up of sex offenders
Best Scene – cold open, almost entirely without dialogue and set to the perfect song
Best Character Interaction – Rossi and Lewis
Least Surprising – the teen daughter disobeys her dad and ends up in trouble
Most Surprising – Lewis was going to turn down the promotion
Best Twist – most of the town fits the profile of the Unsub
The “Welcome Back” Awards – Joel Gretsch of “V” and “The 4400” / Ruben Garfias of various TV and Film credits
Best Quotes:
1. Rossi (giving career advice to Lewis): “This job isn’t all milk and honey. Some days you lose. Some days you do things you don’t want to do. So ask yourself this, where can you do the most good and still do yourself the least harm?”
2. Danny (to sister planning to sneak out): “My silence isn’t free.”
Criminal Minds – 11.07 – Target Rich
BY Emma
Yes, yes, yes – this is the Criminal Minds I know and love! This is by far my favorite episode of the season. So much was packed into this hour yet it still seemed to fly by so if there is only one episode you catch before the holiday hiatus, make this the one. We start with Morgan interviewing Montolo about The Dirty Dozen we learned of in the premier. Unfortunately, we don’t learn much before he is killed. Cut to the BAU elevators and it is JJ’s first day back from maternity leave. Of course the team (and us) is happy to have her back and have gifts for the new baby. It’s great to see how each of the gifts is reflective of the personality of the team members giving them. The laughter is short lived as we get confirmation that Montolo was poisoned and Rossi’s daughter arrives with a case for the BAU. Throughout the rest of the episode, we get great character interactions, some character development on Rossi’s daughter, Joy (clearly, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree with this one), and the case is unusual in that it has multiple Unsubs, all of which are involved with the current case, but only one of them is the current perpetrator that brought the BAU in. All of this in one episode would be amazing but the last scene with Garcia explaining to Morgan what the Dirty Dozen is was the cherry and the sprinkles on top of an already amazing sundae. Since the premier, I’ve felt that this story line was the set up for Shemar Moore to exit the series. Interviews with MGG and others have said that we will lose a member of the team this year. With the reveal that Garcia is the Dirty Dozen, and it being common knowledge that Morgan would give his life for her, I’m almost positive that this will be the eventual end of Derek Morgan.
Grade: A+
Best Reason to Watch – the last scene with Garcia and Morgan
2nd Best Reason to Watch – JJ’s back
3rd Best Reason to Watch – advancement on the Dirty Dozen story line
4th Best Reason to Watch – Rossi’s daughter is back (and the apple certainly doesn’t fall far from the tree)
Best Scene – Garcia explains to Morgan what the Dirty Dozen is
2nd Best Scene – Rossi calls out Joy for being reckless
3rd Best Scene – JJ’s welcome back gifts from the team
4th Best Scene – Rossi finds out Joy has started using his last name (professionally)
5th Best Scene – Reid calls his mom
Best Character Interaction – Rossi and Joy / JJ and Reid
Most Surprising – Rossi’s daughter was attacked while in college
Least Surprising – Montolo is killed
The “Whoa, WTF” Award – Garcia is the Dirty Dozen
The “Welcome Back” Award (character) – JJ is back from maternity leave / Joy, Rossi’s new found daughter is back (with a case!)
The “Welcome Back” Award (actor) – Amber Steven West formerly of “Greek” and Robert Neary of daytime soap “General Hospital”
Best Quote - Rossi (voiceover) – “To a fater, nothing is dearer than a daughter. Euripides”
Heroes: Reborn - 1.08 - June 13th Part Two
BY Laura Markus
This is, by far, the best episode of the series so far. Everything in this episode fell together in just the right ways. Many questions from Part One were answered, and plot points that at first seemed confusing were added upon and explained in this part. My favorite character, Matt Parkman, returned and it was absolutely fantastic. I loved his scene with Noah immensely. Luke and Joanne, who went into a full on psychotic break, was crazy and awesome to see. Carlos and Farrah knowing each other was cool. And Nathan's bond with Hiro was painstakingly beautiful. Seeing Angela again was nice too. I feel so bad for Nathan - having to teleport away from his family and then having his memories wiped by Caspar must've sucked. And Quentin? That whole ordeal made my head spin around. Stay tuned for my review of both parts, here.
Grade: A+
Best Reason to Watch - All the time travel craziness from the first part is dwelled upon and explained.
Best Scene - Matt is forced to read Noah's mind to find out where Claire is.
Funniest Moment - Noah and Nathan finding an old Angela watching over Malina.
Saddest Scene - Luke and Joanne crying over Dennis's body.
The "I'm Not Buying It" Award - It's the same as last week, Kring. Claire's not dead. Sorry.
Most Ironic Scene - The man Luke saved tried to kill him via freezing. Irony!
The "Oh, Cr**!" Award - Joanne looking "blissfully satisfied" after her killing.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Greg Grunberg as Matt Parkman!!!!!
Nashville - 4.07- Can’t Get Used to Losing You
BY Jessica VanWinkle
I think it may have been the best episode of the season. We started the episode right where last week left off: with Jeff Fordham’s death. Everyone took turns finding out, and Juliette doesn’t remember anything. She truly believed that Jeff committed suicide, but Cole tells his father the truth. Jeff tried to save Juliette from falling off the roof. Juliette denies everything until she sees a big sign of herself that triggers her memories. Remembering that Jeff saved her life makes her realize she needs help, and she checks herself into therapy. Juliette will be gone for the next few episodes since Hayden is also in therapy. I wonder what will happen when she comes back. Will she and Avery reconcile? Will she want her child back? I also wonder where this storyline with Deacon is going. While I think it’s nice that he named the bar after his sister, I do share Rayna’s concerns. Is it really the best idea for an alcoholic to own a bar? He did have a good point though: his sister died giving his liver to him. Hopefully this is just Rayna being overprotective. I need Deacon and Rayna to be healthy and happy. Elsewhere, Scarlett decides she wants to go on tour with Gunnar. I usually like Scarlett, but she wasn’t my favorite this week. I thought she was rude to almost everyone and I don’t really understand why. I should mention that I loved Clare Bowen’s decision to cut her hair. She posted on her facebook page about her personal struggles with nephroblastoma as a child. She wants everyone to feel beautiful and confident regardless of how they look. It’s just hair. I encourage everyone to read her post; it’s very moving. Nashville has started moving in a good direction, and I’m excited to see what happens as we get closer to the winter finale.
Grade: A
Best Reason to Watch - the fallout from Jeff Fordham’s death.
Best Scene - Juliette remembers Jeff trying to save her life.
Best Actress - Hayden Panettiere
Best Voice - Layla Grant. Her tribute to Jeff was absolutely beautiful. I would love to hear more of her voice in the future.
Best Absence - Maddie Conrad. It was so nice not having her whining and complaining this week.
Biggest Reason to Worry - Deacon owning a bar.
Best Quotes -
1. Scarlett: “Feel free to call Locks of Love and tell them you need my hair more than a sick child does.”
2. Gunnar: “So Scarlett cut her hair and turned into a crazy person.”
3. Will: “Erin, your one night stand who you’ve just spent the last three nights with, Erin?” Gunnar: “Yeah. It’s casual.” Will: “I think we’ve established that you don’t do casual.”
4. Juliette: “I tried to kill myself. Jeff died saving me.”
5. Rayna: “I’ve never let a little fear get in my way. And nothing’s ever gonna keep me away from you.”
SHIELD - 3.06 - Among us hide...
BY Swanpride
Well, it looks like I was right. In a way, this is a pity. I think it would have been great to experience the Lash-reveal (and wasn't the transformation well done?) totally unaware. But even without this pleasure, this episode was a delight to watch. After focusing the whole last episode on Jemma, this week her story is on the backburner while the other two big arcs, Hydra and the Inhumans, come back to the forefront and touch lightly for the first time. And to make the whole thing more interesting, the show is mixing up the pairing a little bit. May teaming up with Bobby is even more fun than her teaming with Hunter and Hunter turns out to be a great addition to Mack's and Daisy's team. Meanwhile Coulson and Rosalind are dancing around each other a little bit more. All in all, the show deserves a lot of praise for balancing the various story-lines that well while giving each character a moment to shine. With such a large cast, this is quite a feat. If I have one point of criticism, it's that Strucker Jr. ended up kind of a throwaway character. The built-up to him was better than what was offered in the end. Though I guess there is a small chance that he is still alive? But the memento is still strong. The show continues the trend of leaving off with more questions than before. What happened to Andrew? How much in control is he? Does Rosalind know about the Obelisk? She was part of NASA at one point after all. And does she really work on a cure? And when will Daisy finally get her group of Inhumans to lead? I can't wait for the answer.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch - THAT's what I call girl power. Woman power, to be precise.
Best Scene - The Reveal
Best Character - I give it to Hunter for butting in more or less everywhere this week.
Best Team-Up - It's a draw. Every single team up works perfectly...especially since both teams have Fitz to back them up.
Best Turn-Around - Jemma counseling Andrew
Best Prop - Fitz's spy drone
Best Action - May and Bobbi storming the hotel room
Best Bilingual Bonus - May and Bobbi discussing their battle strategy in Mandarin
Most Creepy - The Inhuman Storage looks very inhumane (pun intended)
Biggest Head Scratcher - So...is Gideon Malik supposed to be the council member from The Avengers or is he supposed to be a different character? With Marvel's tendency to reuse actors in minor roles for bigger roles eventually, I am not sure.
My Prediction of the Week - Andrew will end up in one of those containers eventually.
Best Quotes -
1. Coulson: "Are you back?" May: "Yeah. I am back!"
2. Hunter: "If your girlfriend's ex visits from Phoenix, you don't buy him the plane ticket." Fitz: "...that's really specific."
3. Henchman: "What makes you think you can beat me?" Bobbi: "Experience!"
SHIELD - 3.07 - Chaos Theory
BY Swanpride
So far I have holding off giving the show an A, because I always had the feeling that it can do just a little bit better. And I am so glad that I was right (about that and about Andrew's eventual fate). This episode had me on the edge of my seat from start to finish. The show runners made the good decision to let the Ward/Hydra plot lay low and concentrate on the Inhumans. It made the equally good decision to intercut the suspenseful hunt for Lash with the emotional healing of Fitz and Simmons. The result is a construct which I can only describe as cathartic. When the episode was over and everything was said and done, I felt emotionally drained but also somehow lighter. After all, two huge secrets were revealed this week to the characters. And yet I am worried. Because I have the feeling that there are still bigger secrets looming in the background. Werner is still alive, so I doubt that Ward is done with him. Nor do I doubt that Ward has something big up his sleeve. And what is the deal with the secret organization connecting to the obelisk? Is Rosalind perhaps part of it? I can't wait to find out!
Grade: A
Best Reason to Watch - The Feels! Oh, the Feels!
Best Scene - Fitz listening to Simmons recording
Best Character - This was May's episode and she killed it! Or imprisoned it....
Most Unexpected Team-Up - Mack and Lincoln. Didn't see that one coming at all.
Best Prop - Fitz's cleaning station.
Best Action - The whole Lash sequence
Best Detail - Daisy hugging May. It was great that the writers haven't forgotten that she hasn't seen her for months at this point.
Worst Detail - Lash pushing Rosalind over the edge. It looks like he is holding a puppet, because her legs are dangling oddly (he most likely did, but it shouldn't be that obvious).
Biggest Head Scratcher - How does Shield officially not exist? Sokovia should have made it very clear that they are still around.
My Prediction of the Week - There is no way that Rosalind is Hydra. The show is trying to sell us that she wants to kill Coulson, but I am not buying.
Best Quotes -
Bobbi: "I don't need a knight in shining armor; I need you alive."
Mack: "I gotta commit to the shotgun-axe idea."
New Shows
Agent X - 1.01/1.02 - Pilot / Enemy of My Enemy
This may be my favorite pilot of the season yet. To be honest, the 2015-2016 pilots were fairly tame and forgettable but this one is so packed full of great action that it felt like the hour raced by. They didn't drag out the exposition and they let us know the characters through their actions instead of their speeches. That's my kind of storytelling. While the case of the week was fairly routine - important person's kid is taken hostage until a terrorist is released - the execution was pure adrenaline. It reminded me a lot of Scorpion's pilot last year. Structurally though, this show is designed to fill the hole in my TV life where Burn Notice once lived and so far it functions well. Olga is Agent X's version of Burn Notice's Fiona, except that she's ever more over-the-top. Usually I'm not a fan of that, but like Fiona, I absolutely loved this morally ambiguous, take charge, rescue herself, no damsel here antagonist. The Catwoman vibe between Case and Olga worked for me too. In fact, I really hope she shows up again because there are never enough kick butt women on TV. I also really like Sharon Stone in this show too. Generally I'm not the biggest fan of her roles but here she is a competent women, who is able to take charge even when thrown in the deep end. It's good to see Stone getting such a positive role. The main male characters were a lot of fun too with Case providing most of the action and Millar as wise counsel. This is not a show to win awards but it sure is a blast to watch. The second episode slowed a bit in the middle but again, the action was topnotch.
Grade: A- / B
Ranking - 5
Audience - anyone who loves action and a swift moving plot
Best Reason to Watch - ALL the action
Best Scene - Case and Olga fight on the framework
Best Character Interaction - Case and Olga
Best Action - the first 5 minutes were really impressive but really the whole show was action-packed
Best Thinking on Her Feet - Olga Petrovka, who outsmarts just about everyone
Biggest Surprise - Sharon Stone's VP makes for a great character, both competent and decisive
Least Surprising - Case has to work with his nemesis , who dies mid-battle so Case doesn't have to kill him
Most Practical - Olga leaves her high heels behind to hunt down her ex
Most "National Treasure" - the Library of Congress holds all the secrets / secret rooms and tunnels all over
Most Impressive - room protecting the real Constitution
Most Flexible - Olga
Best Guest - James Earl Jones as Chief Justice
The "Welcome Back" Award - James Earl Jones, who still reigns as the Best Voice in Hollywood / Sharon Stone from the 90's / Gerald McRaney from Major Dad / John Shea, formerly Lex Luthor / Jamey Sheridan from Arrow and The Stand
Best Quotes -
1. Case: "You know, Olga, you raise the definition of high maintenance to a whole new level."
2. Case: "In English, the president needs plausible deniability." Millar: "Some of the Founding Fathers were lawyers, ma'am."
3. Missy: "What are you doing?" Case: "Improvising." Missy: "Seriously?" Case: "Well, Plan B is dying."
4. Maccabee: "Tell me this is a wine cellar."
5. Case: "I'll celebrate after the mission when we get those missiles back." Olga: "That is stupid. After the mission, you may be dead. To be alive another day in our business, that's enough to celebrate." Case: "Wow! You must have been really fun in high school."
Flesh and Bone - 1.01 - Pilot
I'm not quite sure what to make of Flesh and Bone. The dancing is superb for all I know about those things and the acting is great for a show starring dancers. Plus the director is definitely more into showing than telling. In fact, there are multiple times when the characters talk but the audience doesn't get to hear what they are saying because the music purposely takes over. I expect that is artsy but for me it was just annoying. So was the tendency not to address secondary characters by name so I had to guess who was talking. I still don't know if the only person who stands up to Grayson is named Jessica or not but I really liked her. Claire though is taken directly from Black Swan's page book. She's a young ingénue with sex issues who is plucked out of obscurity by a vainglorious leader who prays on her awkwardness. The pilot itself was a mishmash of jealous glares, overtly sexual scenes for no purpose except to be sexual, and people full of themselves. Basically it's the cable version of a nighttime soap with fewer cheesy speeches. In other words, not for me.
Grade: D+
Ranking - 1, waaaaayyyy too much sex and nudity for me
Audience - well I'm guessing if you liked Black Swan, you'll like this one
Best Reason to Watch - they hired actual dancers to create a show about dancers
Best Scene - Claire dances after her cell phone goes off
Best Character - Daphne
Best Laugh - the piano player starts playing Claire's ringtone after her cell phone goes off in rehearsal
Most Impressive - Daphne's apartment is amazing but not near as amazing as her closet
Least Surprising - Claire's brother is a sick molester
Biggest Douche - Grayson by 3 egos
Biggest Cat Eyes - Mia when she realizes they are grooming Claire for success over all the other dancers
Biggest Mystery - Why did Claire steal the other ballerina's drugs? Does she want them for herself or is she trying to throw her competition off their game?
Biggest Death March - Claire heading for Laurent looks like she's heading to death row
Strangest Directing Choice - focusing on the director's facial expressions instead of the ballerina's performance
Creepiest Scene - Grayson whispering in Claire's ear in the mirror and saying she's his / the brother call
The "You Know Something's Wrong When…" Award - you have to put a lock on your bedroom door
The "Now That's the Way to Pack" Award - Claire packs a suitcase full of books
The "Nope, I Didn't Need to See That" Award - ripping off nails does not do anything for me
Best Music - Phenomena by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Best Quotes -
1. Jessica: "I'm not nay saying. I'm just saying and you don't like hearing it."
2. Daphne: "You really need to grow a pair." Claire: "I'm sorry. What?" Daphne: "You see this skin. Thick. You can't chew through it. Get some or go home. That's for free."
3. Mia: "Blood sugar thing? I have a cookie. I brought it fresh yesterday, but I was only planning on staring at it."
4. Grayson: "Ballet is the ultimate optical illusion. We make effort appear effortless, we make difficult divine, and we make gravity our b**. We live to dance and we dance because of you."
5. Daphne: "Welcome to the fray, new girl. Try not to fit right in unless you want to spend your whole salary on shrinks."
Spotless - 1.01 - Pilot
This is no Sunshine Cleaning. Not at all. In fact, it's more like Mob Doctor than anything else I've seen. The premise is simple. A down of his luck crime scene cleaner's life is upended when his criminal brother shows up with a dead body full of heroin. Desperate for money to pay his bills, Jean agrees to get the heroin out of the corpse so that Martin can sell it to the highest bidder. Only one problem - Martin's a complete douche idiot who makes every situation worse. Long story short, Jean now seems to be working for a drug cartel instead of the police. While Spotless definitely has its share of gratuitous nudity, close-ups of ick, and excessive language, the story itself is intriguing. Just how far will Jean go to protect the shell of a life he's living? How will covering up murder affect him? Will someone render Martin mute? Please. For now the interesting story outweighs the drawbacks so I'm in for the next 2 episodes. I like the influx of humor to break the drama and Jean is an excellent counterbalance to Martin in the pilot. They will need to tone down Martin though because he's about as cartoon as cable gets.
Grade: B
Ranking - 4
Audience - anyone interested in CSI without the good guys or procedural elements
Best Reason to Watch - the premise is fascinating as is the back story
Best Scene - Jean talks Frank into letting them clean the crime scene instead of killing them
Best Character - Frank
Best Twist - when they were kids, Jean killed a man who was beating Martin
Best Job Perk - Jean's cleaning company allows him to clean up for the drug cartel murders
Biggest Douche - Martin
Biggest TV Trope - dirty cop
Worst Mix-Up - having 2 buyers for the same heroin
Worst Surprise - Martin has a dead body in his refrigerator
Least Surprising - the "therapist" is really the mistress
Least Sympathetic - office guy is more concerned about the cleanup cost than why someone committed suicide
Most Troubling - the little kid is a messenger for the drug runners
Most Interesting Conscience - Frank is worried about his karma but he has no problem knifing a rival several times
Most Disgusting - All those close-ups of brain matter are nothing to Jean lying down shirtless on a public bathroom floor. Blech! Triple blech!
The "That Should be a Given" Award - most people don't feel the need to say they didn't screw someone's corpse
The "Well That Got Violent Fast" Award - 2 minutes in and somebody's got a hatchet in the head
The "You'd Have More Money if You Didn't Have a Mistress" Award - I have no sympathy for these guys' money troubles
Best Quotes -
1. Jean: "You brought weed across the border?" Martin: "Well I thought if they found a dead body, they would let the weed slide."
2. Frank: "I don't feel right killing people unless I absolutely have to. Well I saw a thing on National Geographic."
3. Jean: "You brought a dead body into my home. That changes everything. Be gone by the morning."
4. Frank: "I really don't think that the killing's been justified."
5. Jean: "Dead bodies are not my thing."
Weekly Shows
Ash vs. Evil Dead - 1.02 - Bait
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - still campy, still gory, still hilarious
Best Scene - mom goes zombie
Biggest Moron - Kelly's dad who walks right toward the zombie
Least Surprising - the zombie is in the backseat
Smartest Plan - Pablo snatches the book, guaranteeing that Ash will have to help Kelly
Most Disgusting - Ash pulls brain matter out of Pablo's hair and feeds it to his pet / fork through the eye
Most Evil - Mom zombie claims to commit suicide to get away from her daughter
Most in Need of a Constant Change of Clothes - anyone near Ash
The "I Don't Think That'll Cover It" Award - Ash hands Pablo a Wet Wipe to wash all the blood off his face
The "Welcome Back" Award - Mimi Rogers from NCIS
Best Quotes -
1. Ash: "Sometimes a whale needs it’s baitfish to remind him of where he is in the ocean."
2. Kelly: "Pablo, believe it or not, the rude middle aged man you brought is kind of ruining my mom time."
3. Pablo: "Is this what it's like to be you?" Ash: "Yeah, pretty much. I've never killed my boss before so that was new."
4. Pablo: "Ash, I know you said that when I got hit I'd know what to do but I just got hit and I don't know what to do."
5. Kelly: "And this is Ash, a person I never thought would be in my home." Ash: "Hi. You used to be dead, right?"
Ash vs. the Evil Dead - 1.03 - Books from Beyond
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - the group is gelling together better
Best Scene - Ash decides he needs a pack instead of being a lone wolf
Best Reaction - Pablo to realizing that he just knocked out a cop
Worst Plan - purposely summoning a demon…for any reason…at all…ever
Biggest Ugh - Why are all evil demon books made from human skin? Can they not find a printer?
Biggest Moron - Ash, by far
Most Snarky - Kelly
Most Brutal - glass shard right in the eye
Most Casually Vicious - Ruby pings on the fork sticking out of a zombie's eye
Least Surprising - the book is a gateway to hell / the circle is unbroken
The "Made Me Jump" Award - I knew a hand was popping out of that grave and I still jumped anyway. Such is the conditioning of horror movies in high school.
The "I'm with You" Award - neither Kelly or I want to hear about Ash's role-playing sex life
Best Quotes -
1. Kelly: "Oh sure. I'll just sit here with the police officer we tied up and rethink my recent life choices."
2. Ash: "Okay first off, you don't look anything like your photo so you might want to update that."
3. Ash: "Sounds like a lot of yappin'-ing and not a lot of happening."
4. Ash: "If I get this done quick enough we might have time to stop for churros and look, that's not a racist thing Pablo. That's just a great dessert." Pablo: "Okay. You know I'm not Mexican, right?"
5. Lionel: "It says he preys on the spiritually and emotionally weak." Ash: "Well he can do that on his own time."
TBBT - 9.07 - The Spock Resonance
This was a much better episode of TBBT simply because both subplots delved into the characters instead of stereotyping them or making them the object of stupid jokes. I enjoyed being able to see Sheldon react to Amy's break up, not because I find wallowing entertaining, but because Sheldon gets so little time to simply be human. Leonard's joke was dead on. Sheldon needs character growth and part of that depends on the audience getting to see how he embraces and rejects those messy emotions. Howard and Bernadette both got a good character moment too. I really like how it wasn't one sided but that they both had issues they needed to take care of.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - delving into the actual characters
Best Scene - Howard and Bernadette talk about kids
Best Reaction - Penny to hearing that Sheldon planned to propose to Amy
Biggest Woo Hoo - Wil Wheaton is back
Worst Plan - Sheldon decides to propose to Amy, whom he's not even dating
Most Interesting Guest - Adam Nimoy
The "Say What?" Award - I thought we established in previous seasons that it was Bernadette who primarily raised her siblings, not her mom or her dad
The "Don't Quite Your Day Job" Award - Raj, whose diagnosis may have hit a little too on the head
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bernadette's dad
Best Quotes -
1. Sheldon: "There goes television lying to us again. We let you raise our children and this is the thanks we get."
2. Bernadette: "Alright, let's start over. I'm redecorating - the furniture, the carpeting, the walls. I'm changing everything that depresses me when I look at it. Try not to be one of those things."
3. Sheldon: "It's just my valuables. My passport, my Wil…" Leonard: "You have a will?" Sheldon: "Yeah, my 1/18th scale Wil Wheaton action figure. Yeah, I also have the other kind of will and in it I will my Wil back to Wil." Leonard: "Will Wil want it?" Wil: "Wil won't."
4. Mike: "You gonna be okay down here?" Howard: "Yeah, yeah, I feel like an archaeologist. Indiana Jones and the Single Family Dwelling."
5. Sheldon: "As a child, when faced with a dilemma my mother encouraged me to ask, 'What would Jesus do?' The answer to that was always love thy neighbor, but my neighbor had a dead tooth so that wasn't going to happen."
Blindspot - 1.07 - Sent on Tour
For the first time, Jane is getting on my nerves. She's just plain too good to be true. She's like Trinity, except there's no nifty Matrix download to explain why she is always competent at everything. I expect next time she'll be cooking a 5-star meal while juggling apricots and composing a concerto. They need to start making her more real because right now she's just another superhero except with amnesia. The saving grace to this episode was Patterson and David, whose love of puzzles was contagious. I enjoyed how they worked it out and I hope the FBI is sensible enough to get surveillance on that place so we can get some forward movement on the mytharc. I did love that Mayfair is sharing her big secret with Weller but I really hope that we get to hear it too. Right now I'm not sure exactly how much Guerrero has to do with the overarching mystery. He could be another case of the week designed to bring down Mayfair and Carter. What that has to do with everything is still anyone's guess.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - Lou Diamond Phillips makes one heck of a bad guy
Best Scene - hmm, hard to chose between the action scenes
Best Snark - Guerrero
Best Dynamic Duo - Patterson and David, who are far more interesting than Jane and Weller right now
Best Surprise - Mayfair seems to be reading Weller into Operation Daylight
Biggest Surprise - Patterson ends up breaking up with David
Least Surprising - the sheriff is being paid by Guerrero
Most Busted - Patterson, for sharing classified FBI files with her BF
Most Annoying Trope - trained militia bad guys can't shoot
Most Likely to Die - David, whose curiosity won't just kill the cat sadly OR he's a mole for the CIA and he dies because of it
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - Jane might as well be named Mary Sue right now. She's good at everything even when she doesn't remember that she is. Plausibility = zero!
The "Forget Fired" Award - Patterson, honey, you ought to be more concerned about going to prison.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Lou Diamond Phillips from my teens, Numb3rs, and Longmire
Best Quotes -
1. Reade: "They do know you're in here, right?" Guerrero: "They're very enthusiastic."
2. Weller: "Just to be clear. You have the right to remain silent."
3. Guerrero: "So which is it? Hands up, down on the ground, or don't move?"
4. Weller: "You got something to say, just say it." Zapata: "You're protecting her. She's more than just an FBI asset to you. It's one thing if you won't admit it. It is something else if you don't even know it."
5. Guerrero: "What is this? A scavenger hunt?"
6. Guerrero: "The anticipation is killing me." Reade: "You know what? Your little play-by-play isn't helping."
Code Black - 1.06 - In Extremis
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - Rorish opens up about the night her family died
Best Scene - Christa gets shocked trying to save her patient
Best Back Story - Rorish and Tom
Best Character - the kid who got shot in his pacemaker
Most Brilliant - Taylor, who tells the hypochondriac what he wants to hear and gets him to leave on his own
Most Funny - every time Rorish walks up to Jesse the system goes code black but when she walks away, it returns to code red
Pushiest Person - Malaya
The "Welcome Back" Award - Benito Martinez from Supernatural and American Crime / Cress Williams from Hart of Dixie
The "Welcome Back?" Award - Shiri Appleby of Roswell and UnREAL fame
Best