It's HOMETOWN DATES y'all!
This is always always ALWAYS my favorite episode.
Well. At least it used to be.
Because Monday night's episode? It was just "eh". Shrug and tilt.
The families all seemed sweet, nice, and pretty dang normal... which just makes for an "eh" night.
ABC, take note, "normal" does not good t.v. make.
Which I know you know. Obviously.
WHERE IS THE CRAZY DAD WITH THE ROOM FULL OF TAXIDERMY AND A RIFLE?
WHERE IS THE DATE AT THE MORTUARY?
WHERE IS THE MOM WHO HIT AND KILLED A BIRD AND THEN BURIED IT IN THE BACKYARD?
WHERE IS THE PSYCHOTIC BROTHER? I'm looking at you Des.
Come on ABC, I expected more from you.
1st Hometown Date
Andi heads to Milwaukee to see Nick and his fam.
They go to a huge market, and yes...Nick is wearing a scarf.
However, in his defense, this time it seems to be cold and he actually is OUTSIDE, so I'll give him a pass. HOWEVER, even though I'm giving him a pass, I would like to just make note that there is something about the way he ties his scarves that just seems off. Yes?
They head to a brewery and listen to a polka band.
I barely even notice the fact that they are jumping around and calling it polka (because know this...they are not dancing the polka, they are jumping).....
Andi is wearing a sleeveless version of the MUST HAVE shirt (plus size version HERE), a denim jacket super similar to the MUST HAVE denim jacket, and an infinity scarf (I've linked to the scarf that Shay and Andrea have been talking about and obsessing over!).
I like your style Andi, I like your style.
They walk into his house, and there are like 74 people there....and 10 of them are siblings.
AND ALL OF THEIR PICTURES ARE ON THE WALL.
Lined up.
On the wall.
In 8x10 frames.
First Andi talks to his oldest sister, and the length of sister's dress is questionable. Showing a little too much upper thigh for my liking. I'm guessing a little too much upper thigh for her own liking too once she saw her segment. Then Andi and Nick's youngest sister (I'm talking 10 years old) had a really cute exchange. She was rockin' the polka dots, and she had the cutest little bob.
The next thing I'm about to say might shock you.
I actually liked Nick on this date.
I know.
Hard to believe.
At the end of the date, Andi names all 10 siblings on the wall.
I was impressed.
I'm also quite sure that somebody must have been whispering the names into her ear piece, because who in the world could do that.
Okay...before we head to Iowa with Farmer.....we've got a commercial break.
LET'S TALK ABOUT THE TRAIN WRECK THAT IS BACHELOR IN PARADISE.
HOLY DRAMA BATMAN.
The skin...the boobs.....the tears.....
I. CANNOT. WAIT.
2nd Hometown Date
Andi shows up in Iowa for her Farmer.
And she's now wearing what looks like a grey MUST HAVE shirt, a long cardigan (it was a little bit grandma, could have done without it), and she's still wearing the simple gold necklace that reminds me a lot of THIS necklace (which is one of my new favorites).
They head out to take a ride on his tractor.
And no, that's not code for something. They actually do take a ride on his tractor.
HOW CUTE are these two?!?!
And I agree with Andy, Farmer totally wins the award for HOTTEST FARMER EVER.
DAAAAAAANG.
I took it upon myself to make an official graphic.
I may or may not have added the straw hat myself.
I think the Polaroid is a nice touch.
They sit and have a picnic in a corn field, and their interaction is totally easy and seems very genuine.
And let me just say, Farmer Chris knows how to ROCK a flannel and a puffer.
#farmerinapufferforthewin
AND THEN.....an airplane flies overhead with a message.....CHRIS LOVES ANDI!
I MEAN! GIRLS! WERE YOU DYING? BECAUSE I WAS DYING!
They go to meet his family and seem to have a great time at dinner.
One of Chris's sisters was wearing an Anthro top and jacket,
and I immediately felt a kinship with her.
The family talks about how Farmer Chris used to only wear underwear on school days (seems fair) and how he sometimes toots. Thanks for that one sis.
3rd Hometown
Andi heads to see Nibbles and meet his family.
They spent some alone time together at the baseball field.
Andi was wearing a navy boat neck top, coral cut off shorts (please know that I use the term "shorts" loosely here), a gold necklace, & some grey converse.
She was speaking my love language.
But let's just go ahead and talk about it.
Her shorts were wayyyyyyyyyyyy too short.
Like, I was worried if she'd waxed properly too short.
But let's be honest, the length of my shorts (for my age) could probably
be called into question at times too.
Whatever.
I LOVED the outfit and immediately knew I was going to recreate it.
So, I wore it yesterday (you might have seen me tease it on instagram HERE).
I didn't have a plain navy boat neck, so I went with a stripe. And I totally dug it.
Coral+Navy+Converse+Simple Gold Jewelry
I liked it so much, I'm thinking it's in one of my top 10 favorite outfits since I started the blog!
striped french connection shirt HERE (only x-small left)/ similar coral cut-offs HERE
grey converse HERE / similar silver Michael Kors watch HERE
Kendra Scott necklace HERE/ pave bar necklace HERE / earrings HERE
When the little man and I left to do errands, I picked up my coral tote (my GO TO bag this summer) and snapped some more pics on the front porch.
Coral Tote c/o Gigi New York HERE ($50 OFF TODAY!)
Colorful tassel HERE
Kendra Scott necklace HERE c/o / pave bar necklace HERE c/o
And if you think you've been seeing me wear the pave bar necklace a lot lately, well you'd be right.
I went ahead and threw together a little Get The Look collage too!
Link found below collage.
navy boat neck from Ann Taylor HERE / similar coral cut-offs HERE
grey converse HERE / similar silver Michael Kors watch HERE
Kendra Scott necklace HERE/ pave bar necklace HERE / earrings HERE
Coral Tote c/o Gigi New York HERE ($50 OFF TODAY!)
Colorful tassel HERE
Okay...enough clothes...for now.....
They go to Nibble's family home
First of all, Andi looks like she just belongs there.
Like it looks like the mom birthed Andi from her own loins.
Like you could put her in a family pic and NOBODY would be able to pick her out as somebody that didn't share the same genetics as the rest of the people in the family. In fact, Andi looked more like a sister than the actual sister.
Nibbles sat down and talked to his mama, and my goodness it was sweet to see their interaction.
Nibbles is DEFINITELY a front runner.
Now listen, there was a lot of talk about Nibbles' brother entering the NFL draft and how Andi knew that was a big deal but that she felt like Josh needed some attention too. But by the end of her visit Andi and the actual sister had a come to Jesus meeting about the fact that Josh would have his own family too and that his family would be his priority (high five real sister), and football brother even said he was all grown up and didn't need Josh all the time anymore (high five brother).
All was right in Andi's and Nibbles' world by the end of the evening.
4th Hometown Date
Time to go to Dallas for Marcus's hometown date! SHOUT OUT Dallas!
How did I miss the fact that Marcus was from Dallas?
Here they are strolling through Highland Park Village.
Isn't she cute in her little black shift dress, high pony, and layered necklaces?
Want to get the look for yourself? I'm your girl!
black shift HERE from Ann Taylor Loft
multi-strand necklace HERE
LOVE LOVE LOVE this layered necklace! So easy and affordable!
gold stackable ring set HERE
peacock hinge bangle HERE
heeled sandal HERE
LOVE. THIS. LOOK.
And really. CHECK OUT THE LAYERED NECKLACE! That is 1 necklace!
Don't they look like a perfectly normal couple here?
Well, don't let Marcus's nicey nice guy facade fool you.
Because he's clearly a stripper just posing as a Sports Medicine Manager.
Whatever that is. Sounds like a made up job to me.
First I hid behind my hands...and then a pillow...and then behind the couch, and then finally under the kitchen table.
And then I found myself wishing that the floor would just open up and swallow me whole.
Because this happened.
Marcus could not hold back his stripper alter ego anymore. It had to break free.
And he took off his pants.
OH THE HUMANITY.
Although I must say, it seems as if Andi is a fan of the poorly timed strip tease.
Different strokes for different folks. No judgement here.
Wait. That's a lie. There's a little judgement.
Andi meets Marcus's family, and it goes well.
And by "well", I mean that it was incredibly awkward. It was obvious that Marcus did in fact grow up in a family that isn't the "typical" family. This makes me sad for Marcus because he seems like a really great guy.
If I were Andi, Nick would have been on the rejection limo.
However, Andi sent home Marcus.
And to be honest, I don't care. I really and truly don't. Does anybody?
I tell you what WHO I do care about.
FARMER.
I'm thinking of starting an online petition for THE HOTTEST FARMER EVER to be the next Bachelor. Whose with me?
He's just the sweetest, cutest, most well-mannered farmer ever.
That's it for the Bachelorette Recap.
Click HERE if you want to read my recaps from prior episodes.
Now.
Please listen to me and my next directive.
It's time to eat plenty of carbs and protein, rest up, and start mentally preparing
BECAUSE THE NORDSTROM ANNIVERSARY SALE GOES LIVE FOR CARDHOLDERS TOMORROW MORNING.
And remember, I'll be here giving you the inside scoop!
Check back tomorrow morning for the things that I'm most interested in trying on tomorrow, and then start checking back at about 8:00 tomorrow night (maybe earlier) to start seeing me post some pictures from my shopping adventure!
My friend Andrea even created a special graphic that I'm super excited about...
I will be reserving the above graphic for the BEST OF THE BEST that I believe the sale has to offer!
So.....see you back here tomorrow morning!
xoxo,
Sheaffer :)
Linking up today with:
The Pleated Poppy
Get Your Pretty On
Because Shanna Said So