What man doesn’t long for a man cave? A masculine haven full of man things. A place to be at one with your manliness. To escape from all that is unmanly. To be truly, and entirely, a caveman.
Many have been lost to the legendary lure of the man cave. It has swallowed grown men whole. Wives and girlfriends wander the house for years, confused, unaware that their husbands and boyfriends have simply been down in the basement.
There is an art to the man cave. One does not simply… have a man cave. One cultivates a man cave, tenderly and with great care, as one might cultivate a sapling. Think what the perfect outcome might look like for you. Perhaps you’re a gamer? A movie buff? A sports fan? Whatever kind of man you are, there is a perfectly manly man cave out there for you. You just need to make it happen.
Item 1: A Surround Sound System
Do not subject your tender ears to the tyranny of rubbish sound. You’re better than that, and you know it. If you’re going to use your man cave to watch movies, listen to music or get down to some gaming, it’s all going to sound a million times better with a surround sound system. I think I’ve made my point.
Recommended Surround Sound Systems
Top-of-the-range: Onkyo SKS-HT540 7.1
Buy from Audiovisual Online
Happy medium: LG BH5540T 5.1 Ch 500W Smart 3D BD HTS
Buy it on Amazon
Budget-friendly: Logitech Z506 Surround Sound Home Theater Speaker System
Buy it on Amazon
Item 2: A Film Projector
Two words: home cinema. A home cinema is the beating heart of your man cave. Paired with your surround-sound system, a decent film projector and screen will give you the complete package. Lucky for you, Sensible Reviewer has already put together an in-depth article on the best projectors for under £1000. Give it a read, or if you are far too busy and important to read another article, take a look at this super-quick summary of three.
Recommended Film Projectors
Epson EH-TW5200
LCD and Full HD
Aimed at home entertainment and gaming users
2D and 3D compatibility
Special gaming “fast mode”
Buy it on Amazon
Optoma GT1080
Ideal PS or Xbox projector
Excellent image quality
Great short-throw capability
5,000-hour lamp life
Buy it on Amazon
InFocus IN8606HD
DLP and Full HD
Perfect for movies and gaming
High-quality picture
Long-throw projector – best in long rooms
Buy it on Amazon
Item 3: A Games Console
Not every guy is a gamer, but if you are, chances are you probably have a console already. However, I could not in all good faith rattle off a list of mandatory man cave items without including this. If you’re looking to upgrade or buy your first – a major life decision – then perhaps this will be helpful.
The Two Most Popular Games Consoles in 2016
Sony PlayStation 4
Pros:
Supports Bluetooth
Fast install times
Ability to upgrade HDD
Use of PlayStation TV
Cons:
No multitasking
No backwards compatibility
Updates can be slow
Buy it on Amazon
Xbox One
Pros:
Better for multitasking
Enables cross-play with PC
Use of Xbox SmartGlass
More customization options
Cons:
No Bluetooth
Missing a lot of indie games
Hard to take screenshots and videos
Buy it on Amazon
Item 4: A Painfully Cool Bar Cabinet
Pretend you’re James Bond. It won’t be hard, you’ve done it before. You’re James Bond and you’re having a nice sit down in your man cave (there’s not much spy work on at the moment). You decide yes – it’s time for a vodka martini. We all know how you like it. So you walk over to where you keep your stash of expensive and exotic spirits, and you say something cool. A naked woman appears as if by magic – but you ask her to leave, because girls are not allowed in the man cave.
Now tell me (you’re back to being you now), where are you planning on keeping your stash of possibly expensive and possibly exotic spirits? I suggest somewhere painfully, excruciatingly cool.
Bond-Standard Bar Cabinets
Ancient world globe
‘Oh wow, you have a drinks globe! That’s so cool!’ is what you’d better get used to hearing if you have one of these. You can also get them with a serving area attachment.
Buy it on Amazon
Recycled oak whisky barrel
If whisky’s more your thing and you prefer a rustic kind of aesthetic, this recycled whisky barrel cabinet is just the thing. The very thing.
Buy it on Amazon
Three-tier illuminated bottle display Spirits look better when they are illuminated – that’s just a fact. Let’s not argue about it. This display lets you arrange your bottles as you might see them displayed in a bar or club, with some oh-so-swanky lighting.
Buy it on Amazon
Item 5: A Masculine Mini Fridge
Of course, you may be more of a beer man, or at least someone who enjoys alcohol in all its miraculous forms. A staple of your man cave should be the mini fridge – a plentifully stocked chest of chilled cans, and maybe a sandwich. Man fuel.
There’s something very satisfying about the aesthetic of Smeg fridges, which is no exception with the Smeg 50’s Style Minibar Cooler Fridge. It’s slightly bigger than their previous version and has a lower noise level. Also an all-important bottle shelf for those gorgeous glass gluggables. However, it does come with a Smeg price tag.
Considerably cheaper is the sleek black Russell Hobbs Freestanding Black Table Top Larder Fridge. It manages to stay compact while still boasting a capacity of 45 litres and also includes a little freezer box, which is handy. Easily tucked away in a corner and doubles as a tiny shelf for your action figures/legos/stamp collection or whatever it is you do.
Item 6: A Pool Table
Perhaps you plan on inviting other male friends into your man cave? Yes, they are boys, so that’s allowed. This being the case, a pool table is likely to be a surefire hit. It will also give your eyes a break from screen time – the millennial epidemic.
Here are three sensible options, from pricey to petite. The bigger you go, the more you should expect to pay – no surprises there. The size of your man cave should be taken into account here. Don’t get overexcited and buy a 7ft monster if you don’t have room for it. Consider a fold-up version if space is an issue.
Recommended Pool Tables
Top of the range: Mightymast Callisto 7ft American Pool Table
Buy it on Amazon
Happy medium: Mightymast Crucible 6ft Foldup Pool Table
Buy it from Argos
Budget-friendly: Hy-Pro 5ft Pool Table
Buy it from Argos
Item 7: Chairs So Comfortable You Could Marry Them
Chances are you will spend most of your precious, well-earned man cave hours sitting down. Do not fritter away those hours on a chair that is beneath you – figuratively speaking. ‘A man’s chair is his throne, and from it he rules his kingdom’. No-one special said that, I just find things look more authoritative in quotes.
A chair fit to rule can set you back a fair amount if you’re not careful. Cool if you have the budget: if not, there are options. Let us review them.
Chairs for grand and important gentlemen
For a King:
CINEMO 9 in 1 Leather Recliner Chair
Buy it on Amazon
For a lesser nobleman, such as a Baron or Earl:
Loxley Leather Recliner Armchair
Buy it on Amazon
For 2-3 of the King’s men who may or may not want to stay over:
Popamazing Faux Leather Folding Sofa Bed
Buy it on Amazon
For for the King’s favourite greyhound:
Orange Highback Beanbag Chair
Buy it on Amazon
Remember, there is no shame in the ‘King’s favourite greyhound’ option. It is his favourite greyhound out all of 67 that he owns.
And finally
Don’t forget to kit the place out with some posters, shelves, books, lamps and so on, unless you are going for a ‘classic cave’ look – darkness and sheer rock-face only. Which is fine too. Your man cave, your rules.
Beware all ye who enter here
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