It is the seventh of December! Do you know what that means? Well, last year it meant Ratmas. This year, I, uh, I dunno. I think it’s still Ratmas? It can be, if you want it to be. The Ratmas was inside you all along. Here’s the thread from last Ratmas, for posterity. Look how different everything is! It’s like a time capsule, but with rats. Time raptsule.
Anyway! Many things have changed since last Ratmas; chief of all, of course, is that Accepting No Further Rats is a thing. That means you can’t send rats to Alexis, which was, like, the entire point. I recommend just spreading a feeling of general ratness and magnanimity throughout your day. Some others have suggested that maybe you may want to send rats to Flyte, who is a cool + good dude who does hard work being cool + good. Maybe just send rats to yourself, as a little treat. The possibilities are endless!
If you have a Rat of Glory, maybe drag it out of its cupboard and pass it around. It’s like playing pass the parcel with a landmine!
Rat Sending Simulator 2k14 still exists, it’s real, I don’t know how it got here but it refuses to leave and it keeps bleeding on the carpets and scaring small children and you can play it if you really want to! If you only played it when it was Rat Sending Simulator 2k13, then I added some new and cool stuff for you to slam your face into. I never actually finished all of it, but there’s still stuff to do.
New things! A few months ago I had an Idea for A Game. Not something I could do in Storynexus, because it’s a big self-indulgent Fallen London fangame. It’s about postmen, rats, snow, Ratmas, travelling to far-flung places, rats, the despair caused by receiving no Christmas Cards. There might be some rats in it. Maybe? I called it Postman Apocalypse, because I am drawn to bad puns like haematite to a magnet.
You can play it here!
The above cover image was made by Otaara, because I am absolutely hamhanded at anything approaching graphical design.
I mean, I made this by writing some words on a picture, that’s about as good as I can do.
Alright, that’s my piece. Feel free to recommend places other people should send rats. No cats!!!!!!! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to pass out heavily because I spent far, far too long putting the finishing touches on Postmangame. send bug reports to thedeskofratco@gmail.com and keep on keepin’ on