(Yup, did that just for the sake of rhyming.)
So last Saturday was 8.18.18 which means ten years ago, I made leap of faith and decided to be this man’s girlfriend.
I remember how difficult it was to make a decision.
Firstly, this guy has broken my heart before. LOL. Yes, way before. 7 years earlier from 2008. I’m sure I’ve written about it in this blog somewhere.
Second, I was very careful. I have my “standards” and Rye is nowhere near them.
Have you heard those clichés “I knew you were the one”? Well that didn’t happen for me, because I wasn’t really sure. What I knew that time is Rye would not take No for an answer.
What convinced me is when a friend made me realize how corny it is to keep denying that we’re not in a relationship when we spend a lot of time together. And, that it is not a good testimony for me as a Christian. So then, I said yes. I was clear at that time that saying Yes just meant “courtship”, as in “let’s see if this will work out, if not then we’re friends anyway.”
It may not always be the case but in this instance, I prayed for God to give me wisdom. I sought advices from my trusted friends and leaders. I weighed pros and cons! And then trusted that whatever decision I make, God will be able to see me through.
Looking back, I was just afraid of making a mistake. I was afraid to stray away from “God’s will”. If the decision I made was indeed a mistake, I have God to pull me out of it. At least in my heart, I know that I didn’t make a decision out of impulse or out of selfish need. I knew my heart was in a right place.
Well, I’m happy it turned out for good. I realized that Love is really a choice and a decision.