Funmi Akingbade
One truth has been on for a long time now and I think it is a truth that will be with us for life. That truth is, if you don’t stop learning, you will not stop accumulating knowledge and knowledge, they say, is power and strength. So today, as our custom is on this platform, we are going to be digesting some truth that will add value to the marriages of our readers out there and will enhance their sexual strength. So, read on.
Research has shown that sex for men is usually get set, ready, go; they are always on the move and that makes it so interesting for them. But the case of the wives is a bit complicated. Lots of strings are attached to their sexuality and sexual enjoyment. One topmost challenge is that many wives just don’t know what to do to keep their sex life as interesting as that of their husbands’. So, let’s digest these 20 nuggets for best sex ever.
1… Wife, your husband wants more foreplay, woo you. I am sure you will think it is only women that cherish foreplay alone, Well, the clear majority of husbands said they would love and they expect foreplay to last at least for 15 minutes or longer, this does not only help them calm down; it takes them back to their venerability stage that makes them want to abandon themselves totally to their soul mate one more time. So, wives, slow-burning sex isn’t better only for you. Longer foreplay helps husbands harmonise with their wives, giving them confidence and, as a result, better control over ejaculation. Many husbands know that it takes their wives longer to become aroused. So, relax and take your time and give your husband a good foreplay. He’ll love watching you. This will definitely spur him on, and when he stimulates you with his hand, guide him to show him how you like to be touched. Your magic phrase? “Like this.” That’s all—he’ll get the picture. Slip one hand down his backside and pull his pelvis toward you, showing him the motion that turns you on. During sex, switch positions—you on top. Slowly kiss him along his neck and collar bone. Linger by his belt line, looking up at him as you kiss his abdomen. Then go down on him slowly, looking up at him as you take him into your mouth—which husbands find to be an incredible turn on.
2… Use such moment like this to find out what he likes and just ask. Husbands can be shy about telling their wives what really turns them on and how they like to be touched down there. So, ask. Your permission to be open will create a safe, comfortable atmosphere that can turn into some really hot sex. Ask, ask, and ask your way into his heart and secretly become familiar with his frenulum, one of the most sensitive areas of the penis, which is on the underside of the head. Playful licks and light pressure to the frenulum often coax more blood into the penis for even harder erections. When stimulating him manually, wrap your hand around his penis so that the fleshy pads of your fingers, not the fingertips, rub over the frenulum. Try using a lubricant and if none is available, your saliva will do the trick and make sure your mouth is washed and clean so that you do not develop vaginal thrush infection after sex. This will make the experience more pleasurable for both of you. Place his hand over yours so he can guide you up and down just the way he likes it.
To double his pleasure, stimulate another erogenous zone while playing with his penis— his testicles, his nipples, belly button. Lick the nerve-rich seam running down the middle of his scrotum, then gently push up against the base of his testicles with your hand. That’s a way to arouse his prostate, the sensitive gland known as the male G-spot
3… Wife, please keep the lights on if he wants it that way or keep it off if that’s what he wants. There’s nothing sexier than a wife who lets her guard down in bed. Your husband loves when he can see and feel your body, and the biggest turnoff for him is your acting embarrassed after many years of marriage with children. I would rather you create an environment where you can enjoy yourselves and do whatever you need to relax and feel beautiful. Trust me; he doesn’t see the imperfections that your mind tends to zero in on—all he knows is that he loves you in your totality and your body.
4… You just have to be more assertive. As much as many husbands like to be in control, the bedroom is one place where they would like to see their wives take more control and be the one to initiate sex. Most wives do not know that when they take charge, they are just affirming their complete and total desire for their husbands. This singular act makes the men very vulnerable and easy to display his total love and care. Even outside of the bedroom, wear strapless dresses that flash a bit of flesh. Wear his shirts around the house. Leaving something to be imagined will drive him wild as men get turned on even more by what they can’t see. Slip into the shower with him and soap him up. When you are shifting from one sex position to another, take him into your mouth and look up at him for a few seconds, then turn around and offer him rear entry. These are just some secret desires I have heard from husbands who are not bold enough to tell their wives but would rather pay a call girl for, or a co-worker at work.
5… Wives, do you know the biggest sexual turn on secret for your husband is simply your unbridled enthusiasm for sex with him in particular and not much of your performance such as the oral sex, or the dog position, nor a new sex toy, or new lubricant, or new lingerie. It’s your unbridled enthusiasm and confidence in bed. Remember that men are action-and accomplishment-oriented. So, it is exciting for him to know that he is pleasing you, that you want him and are enjoying him as much as he’s enjoying you, don’t lay down there like a log of wood and casually tell him to inform you when he is done. This among many other things, leads to erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation and loss of libido.
The more interactive sex is the better sex for him and for you. Eighty-seven per cent of husbands say “just lying there” is a dangerous and serious turn off, and 57 per cent say that silence or lip-shut all the way through the sexual act is a sexual letdown. That doesn’t mean that you need to have an orgasm to make him feel whole. Don’t put that kind of pressure on yourself or him. But you’ll satisfy him by letting him know what feels good to you and what he’s doing right. Grip the sheets. Grab the headboard. Moan into his ear and talk sexy. Plead for more. Demand intensity. Direct the game.
All great sexual encounters between married spouses deliver a sense of validation that you really have something special between you both. For instance, your over-the-top passion can help your husband feel closer to you emotionally. This is an aspect many husbands say is one of the most important elements of unforgettable sex.
6… Have you ever thought of springing up special surprises for him such as just keeping your underwear [ pant] on and seductively make your husband just move it to one side of your body and enters you on the same side of the pant? Try it tonight. A wife once told me while suggesting this to her that the way her husband pulls the fabric aside caused it to rub against her clitoris, which felt really great and made it become occasional sexual habits in their home.
Or sometimes, when you come home from work, simply just ask your husband to help undress you, which can become a code for ‘you want sex and you don’t want any other person in the room knows what is going on’. It’s really going to be wonderful for your husband to know sex is on the agenda as soon as you walk into the door.
7… Don’t sit too much afar from one another while watching TV together in the room or living room, give room for body contact. You can put his hand inside your blouse or your shirt or top wear, in a very secretive manner and have him caress, romance and touch your nipples. An hour of breast play gets any woman of any age or any number of children super ready and in the mood for great sex. Please these little little things keep the man of the house in the house and not on the street looking for what is abundantly at home on the street.
8… Be mindful of some random thing that can affect his erection and handle them wisely. When husband’s erection faces difficulties, you can suggest that both of you try spending the night some place more secluded, for his sake. It turns out that lack of privacy plays a significant factor in male sexual dysfunction. Having children in the house and figuring out to pay bills can make the erection go off and also doubles the risk of feeling a little too exposed and under pressure.
Questions!!! Answers!!!
Should I or should I not?
Can I leave my pubic hair growing and tend it the way I do the hair on my head? My husband wants it on and shady and busy and fuller but I think it is not healthy. Please, what is your take on this matter?
Oyinmubo Cecilia
The pubic hair which is also popularly called the ladies’ magic carpet, is part of the female sex organ that acts as a cover for the vagina. Although many believe it must be constantly shaved because it turns out as a breeding ground for bacteria. But the truth is that there’s no question that being hair-free in this area makes the area completely cleaner and free from germs. Some think that the pubic hair protects from genital warts and STDs that result from skin-to-skin contact. However, this is a wrong assumption because pubic hair alone is not enough to protect against STDs. In fact, it could help the virus thrive. Many also leave it on and tend it just for sex and sexuality reason or for fantasy and preference reasons. Many married couples think pubic hair leads to less friction between the sheets, making sex time a bit smoother. And in reality, pubic hair does help cushion and protect the area. While others prefer the more intense feeling that happens when they are hair-free and shaven. In theory, you can get more direct stimulation without the pubic hair acting as obstruction. It depends on what you and your husband prefer and how much stimulation or pressure you both require to achieve orgasm. However, in your case, I would rather you do what your husband says since he is the one that visits the site often and regularly. It’s just simple wisdom to do what will please him because that may be one of his triggers, fantasy, or preferences. Because there are some evidence that pubic hair could be a turn-on for most men.
I have yeast infection in excess
I recently changed my underwear to the string type and since then, I seem to be getting more yeast infections.
Ibbilokoe Kate
Hi Kate, although wearing that thin strip of fabric may save you from the dreaded visible panty lines, which is the reason many ladies go for the string panties, but it also serves as a super highway for microbes. When the underwear hits your perineum (the patch of skin between the vagina and the anus), bacteria hitch a ride straight to your vagina. The string pant is actually a connector. I need you to know that your movement helps this infection because as you move, the fabric in-between you shifts and before you know what is going on, you’ve got a yeast infection. To make matters worse, strings tend to rub, causing tiny tears in the delicate skin around your vulva and clitoris, creating access for microbes. If you must wear string panties, make sure they are cotton or have a cotton crotch. The breathable fabric keeps you drier, so bacteria can’t grow as easily.
You might also consider growing out your pubic hair. Hair serves as a barrier between you and your panties, so leaving more pubic hair on provides cushioning for your vulva. And don’t wear strings when you exercise.
Should I start getting worried?
I have been married for three years now. At first, we wanted to enjoy ourselves, more so I went on pills. But now, we need babies and I have gone off pills but I haven’t had a period since I went off the pill. I am not pregnant, yet can I start getting worried?
New wife
The hormones that are used in birth control pills can interfere with those your body naturally produces to cause ovulation and menstruation. They can do this for some time after stopping the pill. The absence of a menstrual period called post-pill amenorrhea, is not uncommon, especially if your cycle was irregular to begin with.
If you still haven’t got your period within three months of tossing your last pill pack, YOU can schedule an appointment with your gynaecologist. Amenorrhea can be a symptom of other health issues. But personally, I think you should just relax and chill. Your babies will come when they are ready and when you are more relaxed and settled.
Is she okay please?
It feels like a tiny water balloon is growing in my wife’s vagina. I feel this any time we are making love. It’s so prominent that it rubs against my penis while thrusting in and out. And each time I tell her to see the doctor, she says it is not a problem but part of her female anatomy. But I have had reason to have sex with other ladies before and none of them had this type of thing in their vagina. Please, what do you think?
Mr. Jason Chimdi
If you feel this thing on both sides of her vaginal wall, it may likely be a clogged Bartholin duct. These two tiny tubes on either side of her vagina secrete lubrication in conjunction with the Bartholin’s glands (two pea-sized organs under the skin) when she becomes sexually aroused. Sometimes secreted lubrication gets trapped in the duct, causing a soft, squishy cyst that swells near the vaginal opening.
However, clogged Bartholin ducts are usually benign and don’t require treatment. She may be able to unplug the duct simply by sitting in a warm antiseptic bath water for 20 minutes two or three times a day, or a sizth bath. If it looks like a pea and goes away on its own, then it was probably temporarily clogged, and there might not be a reason to be worried about it. But if the cyst becomes painful or increases in size, then she has to see a doctor, who will most likely recommend a procedure called marsupialization. This treatment involves draining the cyst, then sewing the cyst wall to the outer skin to create a new duct. It will heal in about a month.
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