As the weeks go on, it looks more and more like “Panda” by Desiigner is going to be the song of the summer. However, nobody really knows what it’s about (be quiet, cultured people). We’re here to solve that problem. So without further ado, here is a line-by-line analysis of “Panda” by Desiigner.
This what they all been waitin’ for
I guess so
They been waitin’ for this shit for a long time didn’t they
I’ma give it everythin’ I got
Ayo Dougie park that X6 around the corner
Ayy I’m just feelin’ my vibe right now
I’m feelin’ myself
This is going to be a good song. You know that because the Desiigner is telling us is going to be a good song. You don’t trust Desiigner? Well he’s feeling his own vibe so he doesn’t GIVE A FUCK if you accept his artistic credibility.
Panda, Panda
Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda
YES. This song is going to be dope! It’s finally time for an homage to the thugs of the animal community: Panda Bears! Get ready motherfuckers. Just because these terrestrial beasts are endangered doesn’t mean they’re not slaying across the animal kingdom.
I got broads in Atlanta
Twistin’ dope, lean, and the Fanta
Credit cards and the scammers
You thought panda bears were just sitting in trees eating bamboo shoots, huh? Well you were dead wrong, sucka. Panda bears are out there on their hustle every day, robotripping and slinging roch like it’s nothing. You better recognize these furry hustlers.
Hittin’ off licks in the bando
Bando is jungle slang for bamboo. This is a panda’s world, we’re all just living in it.
Black X6, Phantom
White X6 looks like a panda
Wait…How does it “look like” a panda? It is a panda. Panda’s don’t look like pandas – they are pandas. Maybe this was a mix-up.
Goin’ out like I’m Montana
Hundred killers, hundred hammers
Black X6, Phantom
White X6, panda
There we go. This straight-up killer doesn’t “look like” a panda. It is a motherfucking panda. And this panda doesn’t play games. Nah, he’s running through the jungle hyped on blow, crushing weaker beasts with his furry hammer fists. If you see a pack of 100 pandas, you better run or prepare to die.
Pockets swole, Danny
Sellin’ bar, candy
Man I’m the macho like Randy
You guys ever meet Danny the Panda? He’s a heartless thug. The Walter White of the Bear community.
The choppa go Oscar for Grammy
Bitch nigga pull up ya panty
Hope you killas understand me
Panty? Pandas don’t wear underwear. I’m beginning to worry this may not be about pandas. This better be about pandas or I swear to God I’m letting Bao Bao out of the National Zoo. Then we’ll give you something to rap about.
I got broads in Atlanta
Twistin’ dope, lean, and the Fanta
Credit cards and the scammers
Hittin’ off licks in the bando
Black X6, Phantom
White X6 looks like a panda
“Looks like a panda.” Listen up, Desiigner. I’m getting real tired of your shit. Would you say that your girlfriend “looks like” a woman? No. You’d say she’s a woman. So don’t play this “looks like” shit with our panda brethren. Properly acknowledging these beautiful beasts or face their wrath.
Goin’ out like I’m Montana
Hundred killers, hundred hammers
Black X6, Phantom
White X6, panda
Pockets swole, Danny
Sellin’ bar, candy
Man I’m the macho like Randy
The choppa go Oscar for Grammy
Bitch nigga pull up ya panty
Hope you killas understand me
If this song isn’t about panda bears, what the fuck could it be about? Somebody tell me I’m not crazy. Anybody, just let me know this song is about panda bears and everything will be okay.
Hey
Panda, Panda
Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda
Phew. Okay, we’re good. That was exactly what I needed. Let’s hear it for the pandas! Tian Tian, Su Lin, Lin Bing – this is for you. Your moment has finally come!
I got broads in Atlanta
Twistin’ dope, lean, and shit, sippin’ Fanta
Credit cards and the scammers
Shout out to Po, Yang Yang, Xi Lan, Mei Lan, Mei Huan, Mei Lun, and Lun Lun straight up wrecking shit at the Zoo Atlanta. They’re the real MVPs. Everybody knows these killers are cranking dollars out by the second, blazing deep and sippin’ that good syrup. There’s a reason they’re the stars of the US zoo scene.
Wake up Versace shit, life Desiigner
Whole bunch of lavish shit
They be askin’ ’round town who be clappin’ shit
I be pullin’ up stuff in the Phantom ship
I got plenty of stuff of Bugatti whip look how I drive this shit
This is a fundamental misunderstanding of panda life. Pandas don’t need fancy designer clothes when they have priceless furry coats. And they certainly can’t drive. Don’t disrespect Bao Bao like this.
Black X6, Phantom
White X6, killin’ on camera
Pop a Perc, I can’t stand up
Gorilla, they come and kill you with bananas
Hell no. Don’t you go touting the strength of a gorilla. One panda would kill ten gorillas. This is either blasphemy, or this song isn’t about pandas.
Four fillas, they finna pull up in the Phantom
Know niggas, they come and kill you on the camera
Big Rollie, it dancin’ bigger than a Pandie
“Bigger than a pandie?” How is a panda bigger than a panda??? No. Say it ain’t so. I…I don’t think this song is about panda bears. But what else could this be about if it’s not an epic about the trials and tribulations of the strongest bears the world has ever seen?
Go Oscar for Grammy, bitch pull up your panty
Fill up I’ma flip it, I got bitches pull up and they get it
I got niggas that’s countin’ for digits
Say you make you a lot of new money
Know some killers pull off and they in the Wraith
CDG, they pull off and they kill the Bape
Call up Phillip-Phillip, gon’ fill the bank
Niggas up in the bank, we gon’ drill the bank
Fuck we gon’ kill the bank, get it
I got broads, yea I get it
I get cards yea I shitted
What the fuck does this even mean? Is this song about finance as a viable career? Is that why there are so many mentions of banks and moneys? Want to know how this verse could make more sense? IF THERE WERE SOME FUCKING MENTIONS OF PANDA BEARS. WHY IS THIS NOT A DISCUSSION OF THE STRONGEST FORCE TO HIT CHINA SINCE GENGHIS KHAN? PANDAS WERE THERE BEFORE THE GREAT CONQUERORS, AND WHILE THEY ARE ENDANGERED, THEY ARE STILL FUCKING THERE. GIVE THEM THEIR DUE.
This how I live it
Did it all for a ticket
Now Flex drop bombs when he spin it
And Bobby gon’ trend it
Jeff The Don doin’ business
Zana Ray fuckin’ up shit and she doin’ her bidnezz
I be gettin’ to the chicken
Countin’ to the chicken
And all of my niggas gon’ split it
Are these your boys, Desiigner? Are these their names? As the future of Hollywood (The Rock) would say, IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT THEIR NAMES ARE. These are people and not pandas, so who really gives a shit?
Panda, Panda
Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda
It’s too late to save face now. It’s too late.
(x2) I got broads in Atlanta
Twistin’ dope, lean, and the Fanta
Credit cards and the scammers
Hittin’ off licks in the bando
Black X6, Phantom
White X6 looks like a panda
Goin’ out like I’m Montana
Hundred killers, hundred hammers
Black X6, Phantom
White X6, panda
Pockets swole, Danny
Sellin’ bar, candy
Man I’m the macho like Randy
The choppa go Oscar for Grammy
Bitch nigga pull up ya panty
Hope you killas understand me
Panda, Panda
Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda, Panda
What a goddamn shame. This song could’ve been a great tribute to pandas, but I guess it’s just an ode to cars? Drugs? Who knows. Who cares. I never want to hear this again.