2016-06-22



If the Great Pyramid of Giza was really built by aliens, Egypt needs to get them back and redo the job. An engineer and an Egyptologist analyzing the dimensions of the structure have determined that it’s length is off by over 5 inches on one side. Is this true or a ploy to attract tourists disappointed that the Leaning Tower of Pisa was stabilized?

Measuring the last-standing (and now lopsided) member of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World has been difficult ever since the original smooth white casing stones covering the outside of the pyramid were removed. A team from the Glen Dash Research Foundation and the Ancient Egypt Research Associates (AERA), which has 30 years of experience mapping and excavating the area, decided to try a new approach.



Casing stones at the base of the pyramid

Engineer Glen Dash and Egyptologist Mark Lehner used remnants of the casing stones found around the base of the pyramid to calculate what they would have added to the measurements of the structure. Using linear regression analysis based on 84 points that indicated where the original outside edges were located, they were able to plot out the pyramid’s original size.

When they saw the answer, they had to check the figures again, because they showed that this seemingly perfect structure may not have been built perfectly after all. The east side measured between 230.295 to 230.373 meters (755.561 to 755.817 feet) in length, but the west side measured 230.378 to 230.436 meters (755.833 and 756.024 feet) – a difference of 5.5 inches (14 cm).



Does it look lopsided?

Is the Great Pyramid in danger of falling over or collapsing? Should you shave an edge off of the model you sit inside to meditate? It’s not that bad, say Dash and Lehner. You can’t really see the difference with the naked eye and it’s stood for 4,500 years already. Dash thinks that’s still pretty impressive.

The data show that the Egyptians possessed quite remarkable skills for their time. We can only speculate as to how the Egyptians could have laid out these lines with such precision using only the tools they had.

That’s a good excuse if the Great Pyramid was built by humans. Even if you measure twice and cut once, you can still be a little off when quarrying massive stones. But what about the theory that the pyramids were built by – or at least built under the supervision of – aliens? Would they have put up with a 5.5 inch error? Would they have accepted the explanation from the pharaoh’s engineer that “everything will even out when it settles”?

Maybe they should check for a secret room that might contain the original receipt.

“Stupid earthlings will never notice it.”

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