2013-09-23

NORTH GOA: It is a good time to own a shack on the pristine beaches of Goa, especially if you serve kathi rolls in place of shawarma and daal makhni in place of vindaloo curry. Also have a liquor license handy, or at least hoard booze in pirate casks: alcohol prices will soar from the current throwaway rates.



Dilli Kinare.

In a landmark decision, the Goa government in its effort to woo more cash-rich domestic tourists from the metros has renamed the historical Calangute beach which is popular with crowds from North India as ‘Dilli kinaare’.  The famous Baga beach will similarly be renamed ‘Bibi ka sunbed’.

If all goes well, the decision will be finalized in spite of opposition by cultural bodies and local agencies who say it will go against the cosmopolitan and free-wheeling character of the tropical destination.

“Bombay became Mumbai, Calcutta became Kolkata, why not our beaches?” Is the common refrain of the legislators.

Tourism experts see the developments converting the tropical paradise into an year round holiday destination such as Thailand, and doing away with dependence on foreign tourists and global economic conditions. The proposals to convert the beaches include an “Appu Ghar” derivative theme-park and sea-facing DDA societies, together with a fleet of CNG autos to replace self-driven Activas. To accommodate increasing traffic open areas around beaches will be converted into parking lots.

“We will demolish the flea markets and hippy huts for renovation of beach facilities to suit our customers. We have signed an MoU with a Dubai based real estate company to build the Great Mall of Goa, spanning 2 lakh square feet” said Mr Suneel Kelkar of the tourism department.

“The mall would include indoor water parks with an air-conditioned beer island. The beach will have a go-carting circuit, bhutta and gol-gappa counters with camel and elephant rides.” Mr Kelkar added ”We are also exploring similar Mumbai and Bangalore based themes for different beaches, as a new age customized offerings to increase footfalls.”

When asked for comment on whether the beach will have proper garbage and sewage disposal Mr Kelkar declined to go into the details saying all environmental clearances will be obtained.

The opposition however warns the move will create a major law and order problem in Goa.

“We may need to install streetlights everywhere” said the spokeswoman of the Goan solidarity forum. “And dustbins too”

“Some people love to criticize and misinform.” the Tourism minister said when reached for comment on the effect on law and order in the state, already in grip of mafia “As our guests are big drinkers, the move will reduce the illegal drug trade and bring revenues in the form of VAT and excise tax for the benefit of local Goans. We also plan Vaishno Dhabas to line the route from Panjim to the beaches, as we have received complaints from non-vegetarians who have few options here.”

In what say is a related development property prices around Calangute have soared as speculators with political contacts have said to bought land in anticipation of rising prices. A famous Gurgaon based realtor has announced condominiums facing an artificial nude beach, set with sunbathing mannequins in place of real women so as to avoid controversy. The hoardings of the project which has already been launched in NCR read “Seawoods Grandeur: Now See more than just the Sea”

Meanwhile Honey Singh has been roped in to highlight at the Sunburn festival which has been re-scheduled from New Years’ Eve to coincide with the summer vacations.

“Mudgaon ya Gurgaon, naam mein kya rakha hai?” commented Rahil Sharma, a 23 old student at Calangute when asked for his opinion “Aur yeh Vasco Da Gama angrez thha ya Pakistani? Hindi naam rakhne mein kya chul hai logon ko?” He contradicted himself.

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