Monday, Aug 13, 2012, at 08:05 AM
I, Nephi, Having Been Born Of Bulgarian Parents: Desperate Mopologists Claim Ancient Bulgarian Gold-Plate Find Proves Truth Of 19th-Century Book Of Mormon Fairy Tale
Original Author(s):
Steve Benson
Filed Under:
STEVE BENSON - SECTION 14
Below is some predictable silly putty propaganda from an LDS outfit--calling itself the "Genesis Group" and marching under the heavenly banner of "Ancient America Foundation"--regarding a "gold plate book" found in (drum roll, please) Bulgaria--the famous landing spot, of course, for Lehi, Nephi and the rest of the original Mormon pioneer clan. (Actually, what they claim is that Bulgarian gold plates prove Book of Mormon gold plates, which is even sillier, since the Bulgarian gold ones are real and the Book of Mormon ones never existed. Details, details).
Geezus, here we go:
"Golden Plates on Display in Bulgaria
"The world's oldest multiple-page book in the lost Etruscan language has gone on display in Bulgaria's National History Museum in Sofia.
"And something about that book has particular interest for Latter-day Saints.
"As is evident from the photograph, this book was created on metal plates that are bound together with metal rings, similar to the original source documents that became the Book of Mormon.
"The book dates back to 600 B.C., which is roughly the time that Lehi and his family left Jerusalem. The small manuscript, which is more than two and a half millennia old, was discovered 60 years ago in a tomb uncovered during digging for a canal along the Strouma River in southwestern Bulgaria. It has now been donated to the museum by its finder, on condition of anonymity.
"Reports say the unidentified donor is now 87 years old and lives in Macedonia. The authenticity of the book has been confirmed by two experts in Sofia and London, museum director Bojidar Dimitrov said quoted by AFP. The six sheets are believed to be the oldest comprehensive work involving multiple pages, said Elka Penkova, who heads the museum's archaeological department.
"There are around 30 similar pages known in the world, Ms. Penkova said, "but they are not linked together in a book."
"The Etruscans one of Europe's most mysterious ancient peoples are believed to have migrated from Lydia, in modern western Turkey, settling in northern and central Italy nearly 3,000 years ago. They were wiped out by the conquering Romans in the fourth century BC, leaving few written records.
"The Ancient America Foundation (AAF) is pleased to present AAF Notes, a series of research articles by scholars of Book of Mormon culture and history and reviewed by AAF editors. For more, Visit the AAF web site at http://www.ancientamerica.org.
"AAF Note: We wish to thank Jeff Brooks for bringing this very interesting discovery article to our attention, demonstrating that bound metal records existed in the Middle East 2500 years ago as claimed by the Book of Mormon."
("Golden Plates on Display in Bulgaria," by the LDS "Genesis Group," sponsored by "Ancient America Foundation, 1999-2002," at: http://www.ldsgenesisgroup.org/golden...)
Now for some actual history, unencumbered by the above unholy-hyped hooey:
First off, these Bulgarian "golden plates" aren't actual plates at all; rather, they're tiny, lightweight sheets composed of 23.82 karat gold. Even mega-Morg apologist John A. Tvedtnes admits this inconvenient tidbit (probably because he can't go to Bulgaria and steal them, then tuck them away from view). Tvedtnes acknowledges that, in fact, they measure a mere "5 centimeters in length and 4.5 centimeters in width."
(John A. Tvedtnes, "Gold Book from 600 B.C. Discovered," published in "Insights," Volume 23, Issue 5, Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship, Provo, Utah, at: http://maxwellinstitute.byu.edu/publi...)
As to measurements, one inch equals 2.54 centimeters; translated: these Bulgarian gold "plates" are roughly 2 inches square--hardly akin to the Book of Mormon gold plates that Joseph Smith said he lugged down the Hill Cumorah and which he also claimed (albeit not until March 1842) were 8 inches long, 6 inches wide and 6 inches thick. Estimations of the weight of a stack of gold plates that size (as fellow Morg apologist Michael R. Ash reports but, of course, dismisses because it doesn't fit the mythical Mormon narrative) is between 175 and 225 pounds.
(Michael R. Ash, "[Supposed] Book of Mormon Anachronisms," 1998. at: http://www.mormonfortress.com/gweight.... You can see a mock-up of what the Book of Mormon gold plates purportedly looked like as to size under "File: GoldenPlates.JPG," from "Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia," at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gol...)
Here is some additional, more reliable history, minus the Mormon mix of green Jell-O gobble-de-gook that passes for "scholarship" in LDS Land:
"Unique Book Goes on Display
"Text and photo ['Unique Book Goes on Display: The World's Oldest Multiple-Page Book--in the Lost Etruscan Language--Has Gone on Display in Bulgaria's National History Museum in Sofia." on "BBC News," 26 May 2003], at: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/293... . . .
"It contains six bound sheets of 24 carat gold, with illustrations of a horse-rider, a mermaid, a harp and soldiers.
"Etruscan Book [The Book dates back to 600 BC].
"The small manuscript, which is more than two-and-a-half millennia old, was discovered 60 years ago in a tomb uncovered during digging for a canal along the Strouma river in south-western Bulgaria.
"It has now been donated to the museum by its finder, on condition of anonymity.
"Reports say the unidentified donor is now 87 years old and lives in Macedonia.
"The authenticity of the book has been confirmed by two experts in Sofia and London, museum director Bojidar Dimitrov said quoted by AFP.
"The six sheets are believed to be the oldest comprehensive work involving multiple pages, said Elka Penkova, who heads the museum's archaeological department.
"There are around 30 similar pages known in the world, Ms Penkova said, 'but they are not linked together in a book.'"
("Tharcians and the Getai: Romanian History and Culture," at: http://romanianhistoryandculture.webs...)
Not one to let actual facts get in the way of real fairy tales, a Mormon webmaster named Kelly (but posing as the mythical angel Moroni) triumphantly declares the following:
"**NOTE** These plates were dated during the approximate time period as the Book of Mormon gold plates. Mormon critics and anti-Mormon ministries have argued since 1830 that ancient civilizations never used bound gold plates to keep records, therefore Joseph couldn't have found any. Oops, I guess they were wrong again. I'm glad I based my testimony on a witness from the Holy Ghost and not on a witness from a ministry.
"--Moroni, aka Kelly Bingham"
("Unique Book on Display," taken from "BBC News" report, 26 May 2003, on "Moroni's Latter-day Saint Page," at: http://www.moroni10.com/gold_plates_f...)
So, after all the fool's gold dust has settled, the big diff between the Estrucan gold plates and the Book of Mormon gold plates?
Answer:
The Estrucan gold plates are in a museum where you can see 'em.
The Book of Mormon gold plates were swiped by an angel and squirreled away where you can't see 'em (along with the sword of Laban; the Urim and Thummim; the remains of the Nephite city of Bountiful; cureloms and cumoms; the original Book of Abraham papyri; and all the other stupid stuff Mormons have made up).
Neener, neener, neener.
In the name of Jesus Christ. Hide 'em.