“Each afternoon there’s nothing else suitable / But tea and bikkies and The Bold and the Beautiful,” sang The Drugs. I think we should sub out the tea for champagne this week, so we can toast to the last Bold recap of the year!
“You read a whole year’s worth of Jodi’s recaps? Well done!”
When we left things last week, Caroline had just been awakened from a very steamy sex dream about Ridge. This week, we open on Caroline noodling around at Forrester Creations, reminiscing about her slumberous sexy times. Rowr. Rick comes into the room and proceeds to lay a whole lot of snark on her about how Ridge is exploiting her and taking credit for all her designs, but Caroline’s like, “no, Rick. I am but the vessel for Ridge’s mighty genius.”
Oh gurl. You got it bad.
“I will not jump my ex’s dad. I will not jump my ex’s dad.”
But will Ridge even need Caroline much longer? He’s trying to do some preliminary sketches on his own, and, as he shows Katie, his ability to draw is slowly coming back. Katie – who is, as we must remember, a bit jealous of all the time Ridge spends smelling Caroline’s hair – is like, “sweet! you can stop playing the Phantom to Caroline’s Christine!” But Ridge isn’t really listening: he’s all, “ugh, Rick. Did I mention how he was the worst today? I hate that kid.”
“JUST SAYING, YOUR PROBLEMS WOULD ALL GO AWAY IF HE DIDN’T THINK YOU WERE BANGING HIS WIFE,” Katie basically says in a pointed fashion, but does Ridge listen? No. The drawing hand wants what the drawing hand wants, I guess, and what Ridge’s drawing hand wants is Caroline.
Insert your own dirty joke here. There are like five I can’t decide between.
“Only five, Jodi? I am disappointed.”
After leaving Ridge, Katie goes off to see Bill at Spencer Publications, because of… reasons. I’m not entirely sure, actually. But it’s very fortuitous timing, because Justin has just spent some quality time going, “Bill, Brooke is gone. You cannot have Brooke. You know who you should date? Katie,” and planting various other Katie-is-awesome ideas in Bill’s mind.
I don’t know why Justin is so pro-Katie – and I doubt the writers do either, because Justin never gets any character development – but Bill’s head is full of Katie when she eventually walks in. She’s all, “sorry about Brooke!” and he’s all, “whatevs, I hear Ridge is working with Caroline, he is the worst!”
But what is this flickering across Katie’s face? Bill IDs that flicker of jealousy in a second. “RIDGE IS A PLAYBOY AND CAROLINE IS A BABE,” he declares. “They are definitely going to shag. Immediately. In fact, they’re probably shagging right now.”
“Not everyone is as dickish as you,” Katie retorts. “I trust Ridge.”
“No you don’t,” Bill says. “And I know why, too – it’s because you couldn’t trust me when we were married. Sorry about that.”
This is one of the few flickers of self-awareness Dollar Bill Spencer has ever exhibited. Wow.
“What makes you think I’m interested in being self-aware, Jodi?”
Let’s go back to the DRAMZ at Forrester Creations. Eric examines the designs that Ridge and Caroline have produced for couture so far and is very enthusiastic about them. But Rick, President of the company, is Just Not Happy about two designers producing excellent work for a line that’s already behind schedule. Work being done? Quelle horreur! “Caroline did all these designs,” he tells Eric. “You need to send Ridge to Paris, because he is the worst and not helpful and also I hate his hair and he was mean to me and I think he might be banging my wife and SO THERE. Oh and BTW he can’t draw.”
“Actual work is being done and as company president, I must prevent it.”
To be fair, Rick does have reasonable grounds to suspect that Ridge and Caroline might be getting it on ’til the break of dawn. Another session of Fashion Ghost is in session in the other office, and Caroline basically has a hot flash and has to physically walk away from Ridge. “I’m feeling things I shouldn’t be feeling,” she says, fanning herself.
“That’s just two artists coming together,” Ridge says, walking straight back into her personal space.
“NOT HELPING, BRO,” Caroline yells at him. “It’s physical, and it’s out of control, and –“
She is interrupted by Eric and Rick coming into the room. “Ridge,” Eric says, “is it true? You can’t draw?”
Ridge doesn’t say anything – mostly because he doesn’t have time, because Eric bear-hugs him and chokes the breath out of him. “OH MY POOR DESIGNER SON,” Eric whispers into Ridge’s hair.
Eric is a very aggressive hugger.
Rick is not keen on all this affection and feeling-sorry-for-Ridge-ness. “Ridge can’t draw and he is a liability,” he declares, conveniently forgetting that he also cannot draw. “We must send him to Paris. Because the things that are a problem here will miraculously not be a problem in the Paris office. Or something.”
“Oh fuck you, Rick,” Ridge basically says.
Hmmm, one would imagine Eric would think. There is an immense power struggle between my two sons. How can I defuse their competitiveness?
But Eric apparently thinks the opposite of this. “I’m stepping down as CEO,” he announces. “And one of you will be my successor.”
TOP PROBLEM SOLVING, ERIC.
“I, Eric Forrester, have definitely thought this all the way through.”
But Eric isn’t done yet. Hmmm, Caroline seems to be a particular sore spot between my fighting sons, you would think he would think. Better take her out of the equation.
“I’ll be asking Caroline’s advice on who would be best to lead Forrester Creations in the future,” he says, and peaces out.
Stellar work, Eric. Really awesome. This will DEFINITELY fix that competitive rivalry between Ridge and Rick.
“I know, right?”
Rick pretty much chases Eric out of the room and is all, “Dad! Dad! Dad! Here are my reasons why I would be the Number One Best Choice For CEO!”
Here are the reasons.
1) “I am, like, a real Forrester, not a Marone cuckoo in the nest that you raised as your own and have always treated as your own and whose paternity only got retconned so I, Rick, could bang his daughters!”
2) “I did good stuff when I was running Forrester International in Paris!”
3) “I’m married, and Caroline and I are basically the new you and Stephanie, Dad! My name is even the same as your name!”
Here is what Eric should say to these reasons:
1) “Biology ain’t destiny, kid.”
2) “Then how about you go back to Paris?”
3) “Being married does not automatically make one a good CEO. Also, Eric Jr, you had your shot at this one when you were dating Stephanie Jr, and you blew it.”
Never let it be forgotten that Rick + Steffy used to be a thing.
Sadly, all Eric actually says is “hmmmm”.
He then goes off to see Ivy (who has just had an earful about the competitive Rick/Ridge dynamic from Maya and Carter – more on this in the Best Moment section). Ivy wants Eric to approve some designs for her, but he says if Rick’s looked at them, that’s good enough. He’s decided he wants to be more like Ivy’s father/his brother John: to be CEO Emeritus so he can travel the world and do random shit. Ivy looks at him with an expression that basically says, “you know my dad is literally insane, right?” but tactfully does not say anything.
Rick, meanwhile, unloads to Maya, who is auditioning for the role of his mistress by being SO SUPPORTIVE AND UNDERSTANDING OMG. She throws in a few barbs at Caroline and Rick is all, “can you not be so mean about my wife?” but it’s hardly the “say anything about Caroline and I will literally set you on fire!” rant he delivered to her a few weeks ago. All is not right in the marriage of Rickoline, yo.
Some serious trouble in this paradise.
Not least because Ridge and Caroline are, at this moment, admitting their mutual attraction to each other. “About before,” Caroline says. “I’m sorry. I just – I guess I just have a little crush on you. My bad.”
“It’s cool, Caroline,” Ridge says, walking into her personal space. “I have a little crush on you too.”
Caroline’s face lights up before she remembers that, oh yeah, she’s married to Rick. “Well, we just have to be professional about this,” she says, trying to be business-like. “How about –“
“I want more for you than to be just Rick’s trophy wife,” Ridge says, moving even further into her personal space. He space invades like a 1980s Harlequin hero. (Actually, there is a 1980s Harlequin character about the whole Ridge/Caroline relationship, and I LOVE IT.) “I want you to thrive, not to be stuck behind Rick the able administrator.”
Ridge isn’t clear on exactly how Rick becoming CEO would damage Caroline’s design career, but he doesn’t give her time to ask. Because it is MAKEOUT O’CLOCK.
AWWWW YISSSSSS.
And then, while Caroline is still dazed from the power of snog, Ridge whispers, “don’t you agree that you and I would be the best team to lead Forrester Creations into the future?” into her hair.
Low, Ridge. Real low.
Caroline, recognising that she is maybe not thinking straight right now, flees the room. She escapes to the office over the hall, but Ivy and Rick are already in there, going through some (GASP) business stuff. “What’s up?” Rick asks, seeing that things are very much Not Okay in Caroline land.
“I – um – I had to block someone on social media,” Caroline blurts. “They were leaving mean comments on my pictures, and I just had to – block them.”
Caroline’s obsession with social media is kind of legendary on Bold, and I’m amazed they haven’t created an actual account for her. That would be such a good tie-in. HIRE ME AND I WILL RUN YOUR TRANSMEDIA, BOLD. #heyboldhirejodi
“Don’t you even understand how good Jodi would make my Twitter account?”
Rick has to go deal with something, and Ivy, the best platonic lady whisperer in the history of Bold, recognises that Caroline needs a goddamn friend right now and tries to get the real story out of her. Caroline is fairly circumspect – she acknowledges that her problem revolves around Ridge, but not that it is a kissing problem – but I think Ivy gets it.
I love love LOVE that one of Ivy’s defining characteristics is that she supports other ladies. She even supports Hope, who she clearly despises. This is one of the many reasons why I like her so much. Never has Bold seen such a good ladyfriend.
“To be fair, I don’t have much competition.”
Over in the other office, Ridge’s post-snog reverie has been intruded on by Eric. It is Ridge’s turn to lay out his reasons why he would be the Number One Best Choice For CEO, and they are as follows:
1) “I have been CEO before and I was good at it.”
2) “Rick is a brat and a bully and can’t draw and I hate him.”
3) “Rick killed my daughter.”
I was delighted to see Phoebe get a mention. Her death really is crucial to the Rick/Ridge rivalry and it’s hardly ever remembered.
I REMEMBER YOU, PHOEBE!
Eric seems to be much less keen on Ridge’s reasons for being the Number One Best Choice For CEO than he was on Rick’s. He’s all, “you can’t draw either,” and when Ridge protests that his ability is coming back, Eric is like, “prove it,” and Ridge – perhaps predictably – chokes as soon as he picks up the pencil.
Then Eric is like, “look, Ridge, I might hire Rick because he’s more settled than you are. He has a wife, and his wife is awesome.”
Surely Ridge, if he really wanted, could file some kind of discrimination lawsuit here, especially since his bestie is Carter the lawyer. (And also, even if the marriage thing was in any way relevant, Ridge is engaged to Katie. It’s not like he’s out playing the field every night, even with his secret Caroline makeout times.)
Ridge clearly realises just how crucial Caroline is to Eric’s decision, and there is a tell-tale glint in his eye… DUN DUN DUN.
Someone’s about to unleash his sexy older man powers…
Next thing you know, Ridge is in the other office with Caroline, and the door is closed. “I’m sorry for kissing you before,” he says, coming behind her and space-invading in his best impression of a 1980s Harlequin hero. “It’s just… you remind me so much of her sometimes. Your aunt. Your namesake. The first Caroline. My wife.”
“I’m not my aunt,” Caroline replies, visibly trembling. “That kiss never should have happened.
But she turns, and she looks at him, and he looks at her, and IT IS ON. IT IS ON SO HARD. THE SEXOPHONE PLAYS, AND –
“Caroline?” asks Ridge, touching her shoulder.
That’s right. It was another sex dream. Caroline has it so, so bad.
“And I hadn’t even begun to unleash my sex powers yet.”
She runs away from him because she “needs a moment,” but Ridge follows. “I can’t risk my marriage just to be your creative partner,” Caroline declares, fanning herself to ward off Ridge’s sexual magnetism. “You need to keep your hands to yourself, and I need to keep my lips to myself, and that’s the way it needs to be.”
“You married the wrong man, Caroline,” Ridge says quietly.
“I love my husband,” she protests.
“We need to keep working together,” he says. “What we’re creating – you know it’s special. Magical. Powerful.”
“You just want me to tell Eric that you and I are the future of Forrester Creations,” Caroline says. “I can’t do that, Ridge. I can’t betray my hus –“
She is cut off by the power of Ridge’s snogging.
She pulls away, but he has her in his force field now. She looks deep into his eyes, then wraps her arms around his neck, and verily, my friends, it is the mightiest of pashes: a pash so mighty that Caroline has to literally run out of the room afterwards, presumably to have a cold shower.
I’m calling it: Ridge and Caroline are going to end up in the steam room together at some stage. That’s happening.
Let’s cross over to the other, far less sexually intense plotline now. Hope has finally deigned to show her face at work, and dumps a copy of What To Expect When You’re Expecting on her desk along with her handbag.
The door closes behind her. “Hope,” Aly says, “I have to talk to you. If you want Liam, you have to leave Wyatt and make your move now, because he and Ivy are getting super close and it’s actually really adorable and I love them together and – oh. I get it now. You’re pregnant.”
“Well, my favourite ship just went down in smoke.”
“Yep,” Hope says. “Preggers. That is me.”
“So that’s why you stayed with Wyatt,” Aly says.
“No, I like, totally love him,” Hope says. I don’t think she’s even trying to sound sincere any more.
“Wow,” Aly says. “I mean, congratulations and all, but you must be super bummed. Because of Liam.”
“PLEASE STOP SAYING HIS NAME IT IS MAKING ME SAD,” quoth Hope.
Said Liam is up on the roof having lunch with Ivy. He’s all, “I’m so glad I met your dad!” and she’s like, “I realise he is mega-weird, so I hope he didn’t scare you off,” and he’s all, “not a chance, Ivy Forrester,” and it is actually really nice. I am not used to liking Liam Spencer. What is happening to me?
WHO IS THIS FUNNY, LIKEABLE CHARACTER AND WHAT HAS HE DONE TO LIAM SPENCER?
Anyway, they make a date for dinner that night at Liam’s, and he peaces out. But who should he happen to run into, looking for Aly?
It’s Hope, of course, and all that likeability just drains away. Ugh.
It’s a fairly typical Hope/Liam scene. I’ve probably recapped a hundred like it. They have that whole, “fate tore us apart! We are so star-crossed!” conversation they’ve had a million times before. Then he’s all, “how are you feeling? I’ve been doing some reading about pregnancy for you,” and I remembered violently just how little I like him as I yelled at the TV, “DON’T YOU MEAN YOU DID ALL THAT READING WHEN YOUR WIFE STEFFY WAS PREGNANT WITH YOUR CHILD, DICK?”
REMEMBER THIS, LIAM?
Anyway, Hope says she’s fine, apart from her crazy mother in law. Liam’s all, “promise you’ll call me if Quinn becomes an issue and, like, tries to kill you or something,” and Hope promises she will. Then she admits that she’s jealous of Liam’s new relationship with Ivy and leaves the room with one long lingering glance while the violins of tragedy play. Ugh.
Hope goes home to Wyatt (obviously she got a lot done in her workday – two whole non-work related conversations? What a day at the office). But he is not alone: he has been trying – and failing – to kick Quinn out.
But Quinn has come to make her Please Let Me Be In Your Baby’s Life case to Hope and she will be heard. “I just want to be a part of my own family,” she pleads with Hope. “Please forgive me for all the crazy things and attempted murders. Imagine how your mother would feel if you tried to cut her out of her grandchild’s life.”
Hope refrains from saying “my mother hardly ever sees the grandchild she already has”, and just says, “nope,” instead.
Okay, it’s actually kind of fierce.
(Seriously, how old is Bridget’s kid Logan now? He could be a full grown adult and his grandparents Brooke and Eric would never know.)
But back to ladies more awesome than Hope. Aly has found Ivy and they are having an urgent friend debrief about Hope’s pregnancy. Aly’s all, “it’s so sad that this pregnancy has torn Liam and Hope apart,” but Ivy’s not having it: she’s like, “look, they’ve had a bazillion chances. If asked the question ‘were Hope and Liam meant to be?’ I would go with a solid NO.”
Aly sees quickly that Ivy is right. “Now you and Liam have a shot,” she says, smiling at her bestie. “Liam needs someone like you.”
Ain’t that the truth, tiny Forrester. Ain’t that the truth.
And I think Liam knows it, too. When Ivy goes round to his place for dinner that night, he pours champagne, and they toast. “To the guy that saved my life,” she says.
“To the girl that saved mine,” he replies softly.
It is a testament to Ivy’s awesomeness that I am emotionally invested in one of Liam’s relationships.
Best moment this week?
This week’s Best Moment goes to a little scene on the rooftop at Forrester Creations that was full of awesome.
For one, it began with shirtless Carter.
AWWWW YISSSSS
Maya is also working out on the roof, and asks Carter to spot her while she lifts. Carter – who, as we must remember, completely loathes his ex – looks around for an excuse, and sees Ivy coming up to the roof. “Sorry, I can’t,” he says. “My date’s here.”
Maya is aghast. And I was SO EXCITED, because you have no idea just how quickly I could jump on board the Carter/Ivy train. Seriously.
Anyway, sadly Carter and Ivy are not dating, and the scene devolves into Maya and Carter sniping after Maya makes pointed remarks about Ridge and Caroline, and Carter’s all, “ugh, Maya thinks Ridge and Caroline are banging,” and Ivy laughs and is like, “yeah nah.”
But this scene also includes Maya touching (still shirtless) Carter’s arm and saying, “I never faked anything when I was with you.”
“Not one – single – thing.”
I wish to high five the writer that snuck that one in. I will buy you a drink when Bold caves to the inevitable and hires me. #heyboldhirejodi
Best line this week?
I’m going to give this one to Ms Katie Logan. When Bill is all, “how could Ridge resist the luscious charms of my babe niece Caroline?” Katie fixes him with a glare and says icily, “Are you planning to finish puberty any time soon?”
Burn, Katie.
“Entering it into my burn book immediately.”
Predictions for next week?
I’m pretty keen to see how this Liam/Ivy dinner pans out. I could be on board for some post-prandial snogging. I could be so on board with that. Though if Ivy wants to peace out and snog Carter instead, I would also be very on board.
Less keen on this Hope/Quinn thing. While I find her more interesting talking to Quinn that when she’s talking to her love interests, I already know exactly how this conversation will go, because it’s been had. A lot. Now, maybe if Deacon comes back into the mix…
But mostly I’m on board for more Ridge/Caroline snog shenanigans, because that plotline is working for me SO HARD.
YES YES YES
Catch you in the New Year, Boldies!