A few days before, while I was walking on the roads, I came across the normal lot of people that one is bound to find on a busy evening. There in the crowd, I saw a pregnant woman and she were accompanied by her husband. The world obviously then assumed a sense of responsibility and a feeling of consideration towards the expecting mother and offered to help her. The father-to-be, however, remained like a shadow that was completely ignored by the people all around. Nobody seemed to realize what he was going through during pregnancy. With all due respect to the mother, my heart went out to her husband. Today, all sorts of medical consultation facilities, maternity leaves, professional counseling and what not are available for the pregnant mother. But, who cares about the father-to-be? If thought, it would be an easy deduction that the father would also need some of those things in future or rather in present too, in order to be equipped well to become one. So, though not professional, here are some tips that can come handy for our fathers-to-be out there.
1. Research..!!
We are in such times where we do not buy even a simple mobile phone before searching about it on google. We spend hours and hours sitting in front of our laptop and computer screens and read stuff that is highly irrelevant to us or play addictive games or just play those stupid quizzes that promise to tell you your personality type. Why not use this addiction to your benefit? There is no dearth of material, be it articles, movies or e-books, available on the internet dealing with the entire corpus of pregnancy and motherhood. If you could just take out some time from your not-so-productive hours spent on the internet and instead, make good use of it, you will be able to gather information about pregnancy. You can never be sure of what to expect next during pregnancy, unless you are a doctor yourself. And if you are not one, you can always research well. This would not only reduce your anxiety levels and increase your confidence as a father, seeing a confident you will also make you partner feel good and confident. You do not want to get caught in a situation where you are dumbstruck and do not know what to do next. Go to the nearest library or book shop or just use google. The motive is to research well.
2. Reduce your workload
So your partner is pregnant and you come home late midnight. There is nothing wrong in it technically as you need to work too. But, if you could just come home early or take a day off or two to spend time with her, it could do wonders for her. A pregnant woman needs emotional support as there is a new life budding inside her. By reducing your workload, you will not only be able to take care of her health but also connect with her on a spiritual level as this is a time where you both would realize the wonder of nature and the entire enigma of it. Pregnancy is that time of your life which you do not want to miss. And if you are in of those amazing companies that provide paternity leave, consider yourself very lucky.
3. Practice Insomnia
Babies cry. The world knows that. You have opted for pregnancy and there is no way you can run away from this. In addition to that, pregnant women tend to have erratic mood swings and can have midnight cravings that need to be taken care of. So, you need to deal with that too. We know you love your sleep but let’s face it, you need to keep that love aside for a few months or years in order to have a happy family. Yes, it is that plain and simple. If the pregnant belly is keeping your partner awake at night, do not go to sleep. Be with her. Talk to her. You will cherish these little moments in future and smile. And all it takes is just a few hours of sleeplessness. And come on, that is happy sleeplessness.
4. Baby-proof the House
Now that a baby is on board, you must take measures to baby proof the house in advance. It does not only refer to the moving of sharp and pointed objects to a higher level so that they do not hurt the crawling baby, it also refers to bringing a change in our daily habits which can prove to be very harmful for the baby. For instance, quit smoking and drinking. You will need time to get rid of these habits and so you should start with it right now. If you simply cannot quit, reduce it considerably. We all know how harmful it is.
5. Brace yourself
It is not just your partner who is pregnant. You are pregnant with her too. Pregnancy is not the time for ‘I’ and ‘you’. It is the time meant for ‘we’. The feeling is overwhelming and we do agrre with it wholeheartedly. You will undergo a roller coaster of emotions. At one point of time, you would be super happy but the very next moment, you might just feel burdened with responsibilities. However, do not go into the panic mode. We know panicking might just come naturally to you in these times but curb that urge to panic. Brace yourselves for one of the most spiritually and emotionally enriching moments of your life. This is a time when you will discover yourself and your partner in ways you would never have had imagined. Soak it all in and let the feeling sink in because the feeling is beautiful.
All this is not to mean that these things are only relevant for the fathers-to-be. They are as much a share of the mothers as well. It’s just that if you, as a father, too are sensitive towards these things, it would only add to the joy of being pregnant and would also help in bringing up your child in a better way.
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