alwayslabellavita:
It makes me laugh (read: it disgusts me) when anti-feminists, MRAs, the large majority of men, and generally unenlightened people (male and female alike) claim: "Men and women are equally sexualized in media! Stop acting like it’s only women! Ever heard of 50 Shades of Gray? Magic Mike? Hypocrites!"
Right…let’s get into this, shall we?
1. Sexualization in media isn’t the problem. Both men and women are sexualized in the media. This is a fact. The problem is hyper-sexualization. Sexualization can be normal in the media. Women are sexualized for Victoria’s Secret ads and perhaps ads for feminine hygiene products and I guess this works because those ads are trying to make women feel pretty and sexy. Men are sexualized in men’s underwear ads and men’s hygiene product ads and this is pretty normal because these ads are trying to make men feel sexy and hot.
But this is not what people are talking about when they talk about sexualization in the media. What people really mean is hyper-sexualization in the media. Hyper-sexualization is an OVER sexualization of someone in a context that does not make sense for them to be sexualized at all. And this, my friends, only happens to women. Women are hyper-sexualized for every and any type of ad you can find. Food? Yep. Cars? Definitely. Sports? Uh huh. Vacations, restaurants, shoes, clothes, gum, men’s body spray and deodorant, banks…any type of ad that is out there, you can likely find one with a usually almost-naked, provocatively-posed hyper-sexualized woman. I even once saw an ad for Direct Cable with a scantily-clad woman wrapped around a TV staring at the viewer seductively. Please tell me when was the last time you saw an ad for cable or cars that featured a ripped man wearing only underwear draped across the car and staring seductively at the screen.
That’s right. You won’t find those things. And it’s no good saying, “But cars are marketed towards men! That’s why these things happen!” A) No, they’re not, I’m pretty sure women drive and buy cars, and B) What about everything else on the planet that is advertised with hyper-sexualized women? Like that one Subway ad with a woman opening her mouth, kneeling, and facing a foot-long sandwich? I don’t think I need to explain to anyone what Subway was trying to insinuate.
It’s only been in very recent years that some companies have decided to reverse the tables and display hyper-sexualized men in their ads. I once saw an ad for salad dressing with a basically-naked man laying in a field with an apron or something covering his private parts, smiling seductively at the camera. And I’m pretty sure my eyebrows rose and I was stunned because I’d NEVER seen an ad that displayed men like this. So yes, some companies are turning the tables—but very few companies are turning the tables so no, this doesn’t mean men are hyper-sexualized like women yet. It just means men are getting a tiny taste of what women have to see on a daily basis.
It also always makes me laugh (read: grimace) when people bring up Magic Mike as if to say, “AHA. I’VE GOT YOU NOW, STUPID FEMINIST. WHAT ABOUT THIS MOVIE, HUH?” and I want to sigh and rub my temples and put my head down and cry. Because while, yes, romantic-comedies and chick-flicks generally have cute guys and shirtless guys (and don’t worry, I’ll get to this point in just a minute!), I think Magic Mike was one of the first movies every that hyper-sexualized men and was marketed towards the straight female gaze. And I want to ask, “How does Magic Mike prove anything? ONE movie hyper-sexualizing men and marketed towards the straight female gaze doesn’t magically negate 98% of Hollywood movies that are directed towards the straight male gaze and feature hyper-sexualized women.” Men are so used to women being hyper-sexualized in movies that they actually get angry when you point it out. But here, let’s have an example—how come in Iron Man 3 (I believe it was), when Pepper Potts fell from Tony’s grip, she fell basically wearing just a bra? Tell me why that was necessary. Tell me why she had to be in her underwear. And this is just an innocent example! Let’s talk about Star Trek: Into Darkness. Why did Alice Eve have that unnecessary and completely gratuitous shot where she was just standing around in her underwear? Why did the poster for The Avengers feature every Avenger in a badass pose—except Black Widow, who was turned to give viewers the best shot of her butt?
I could go on and on about examples of this because it is EVERYWHERE. Almost all media is targeted for the straight male gaze, even when men and women almost equally consume the media. But I won’t. I know what people will bring up next: “Are you KIDDING me? What about all those shirtless scenes of Thor? What about those close-ups on Captain America’s butt? What about Wolverine being shirtless? Men totally show off their bodies in movies too!”
2. This is the second part. This is what I personally call the Sexualization After Effect. In a perfect world…whether men or women were sexualized…whether men or women were hyper-sexualized…those sexualized fantasies would stay IN the media and wouldn’t translate to the real world. But that’s not what happens, does it? There is definitely an after effect of the hyper-sexualization of women in movies that doesn’t apply to men.
Simply speaking…when men see hyper-sexualized women in movies, the idea that women = bodies = pleasure = objects is further cemented in their minds. And for some reason, men are incapable of separating fantasy from reality…so when they walk out of the movie theater after seeing Alice Eve in her underwear, they DON’T think, “Man, she was so hot—but obviously no woman is going to gratuitously show off her body like that to random people.” For some reason, they like what they see…and they expect all women to be that way. They expect all women to show off their bodies for them. They expect women to smile for them on the street. They expect women to take cat-calling. They feel entitled to stare at women, make comments about women’s bodies, touch women’s bodies, invade their personal space, judge them on their bodies, harass them about their looks and bodies.
Proof of this? I mean…how much proof do people need? Rape statistics and sexual assault statistics—which show that the LARGE majority of victims are women and the LARGE majority of aggressors are men—clearly show that men have a disconnect in their thinking where they’re seeing women as sexual objects. And don’t tell me the media has nothing to do with this.
But going back the Sexualization After Effect… It doesn’t work the same way for men. Women read 50 Shades of Gray. Women watch Magic Mike. Women watch romantic comedies with shirtless guys. In fact, women watch action movies with—yes—shirtless guys. Women sigh and swoon over them. And you know what happens when they leave the theater? When they close out of Netflix?
NOTHING. Nothing happens. Women can tell the difference between reality and fantasy. They are aware that the hyper-sexualized males they see in the media are just that: fantasy figures. Not real men. Not the way real men would—or should have to—act. Not the way real men want to act. Women don’t suddenly feel entitled to men’s bodies. They don’t suddenly start seeing guys as pieces of meat. They don’t suddenly start cat-calling. They don’t start groping, touching, teasing, making lewd comments, threatening, acting aggressive. They don’t start sexually assaulting and raping men.
Do a few women do these things? Yes. No one is erasing male victims of sexual assault/violence and rape. Male victims DO exist and should NEVER be forgotten.
But there is NOT a widespread societal problem with men being seen as sex objects in the media and then—due to the Sexualization After Effect—being harassed in real life as a consequence. Again, in a perfect world, if men were able to actually discern fantasy from reality (the way most women can) and didn’t cat-call, harass, grope, assault, or rape women in real life—and yes, these issues happen FAR too often to too many women to not be considered a societal problem anymore—then I don’t really think many women would care if women were sexualized in movies. Because it wouldn’t come out of the movies to harm women in real life.
But it does. In ways that it doesn’t for men. In ways that it never will for men. And that’s why it always amuses and stuns and horrifies me when people actually think men and women are equally sexualized in equally harmful ways.
TL;DR: Get a grip and stop deluding yourself.