(Pt 2) this has been going on ever since a really traumatic year i had in school (i was self harming at the time and nearly attempted suicide) i moved to a new school after that year, and i met a really wonderful guy. we started dating, and I was happier than i had ever been in such a long time. However, he started gaslighting me, and we had fights often, where he would ignore me for days until i apologised for nonexistent things.
(Pt 3) eventually we had such a bad fight that he completely cut off contact with me after telling me over text that I was never anything but whiny, clingy and annoying to him. That was three months ago, and i’ve been extremely suicidal and sad constantly. It won’t go away, when it does it’s only temporarily until it comes back. I’m just so sad, I don’t have any friends and i’m alone again. I’m terrified that next year at school will turn out like the really shitty year I had when everything
(pt 4) i’m terrified that my next year at school will turn out like the one I had when all of this started, I have nightmares about it often. If it does, I don’t know if i’ll be able to go through that experience again. i’m so so sorry this turned out more of a rant than a question :/ sorry if i’m wasting your time with unnecessary details, I’m just so scared. thank you so much for taking the time to read this <3
Tw: Self harm, suicide attempt, abuse
Hey anon, first of all, you are absolutely not wasting our time. I think there are a couple of questions in here, so I’m going to try to hit them one at a time.
First of all, you say that you think you are depressed. I can’t diagnose you, but this does sound like something worth talking to a therapist about. Please also check out our resources to see if you can find anything that might help you with what you’re feeling.
I’m going to link you to some resources on the friendship issues you’re experiencing.
Here is a post listing 8 simple tips to help overcome loneliness.
This post lists 10 tips on how to work through feelings of social isolation.
Mental Support Community A forum where you can talk about relationship difficulties such as how hard it is to make relationships work.
Mental Help A site that has basic information, resources, articles, and a list of books that might be helpful.
How to Stop Arguing and Actually Solve Your Relationship Problems
How to Deal With Losing a Friend
Coping With Cliques
10 ways to build emotional boundaries
Creating emotional freedom
Healthy personal boundaries
Emotional boundaries
As far as your ex goes, it sounds to me like he wasn’t good for you. It can be hard to lose someone, but it sounds like not having him in your life is probably a good thing at this point.
Finally, you seem worried about next year. What I’m going to say is probably going to sound cheesy, but it’s true. The next year is in the future, and there’s nothing you can do about it right now. I would look into finding a counselor that can help you, and try to meet obstacles as they come. It might be that nothing bad happens, but if something does, you have tons of resources at your fingertips with which you can get treatment.
Best of luck and stay strong,
Rowan