OnePlusOne asked 1,400 parents to take part in a survey about Sleep, Sex, and Sacrifice. There is a lot of talk about the fear and worries of a new mother.
But what about the new dads? You’ll find out that they have often the same concerns or worries as their partner. And it doesn’t matter if they are married or living in cohabitation.
New dad fact 1: 25% of new dads worry that their partner had gone off sex
No, they haven’t. What some newly dads do not realise is that this problem often does not exist. More commonly, women are often scared that their partner is not attracted to them anymore after having a baby. Statistics say that 40% of new mums felt they may no longer be sexually attractive to their partner.
Dads can help their partners to feel more attractive by showing their affection to them. This can be the smallest thing such as a nice text message or love note or by telling her how much he loves her. Let her know that you think she’s beautiful.
By being sensitive, caring and loving, you make your partner feel appreciated. This will help to find the way back to the previous sexual relationship, usually it gets even better. Around a quarter of mums and dads said they longed for time alone as a couple immediately after having their child.
New dad fact 2: 11% of new dads felt they may no longer be sexually attractive to their partner
It is absolutely normal that your sex life will change after having a baby. Just because your partner is not ready to have sex with you after birth doesn’t mean that she’s no longer attracted to you! Intimacy will return soon again.
It’s interesting to note that many women miss the sexual relationship too! But it is also true that some women feel that sex is just another service they have to provide for another person’s need on top of the baby’s needs. So do not pressure for sexual acts. Care for your partner and she will feel loved and appreciated.
New dad fact 3: 7% of new dads would like their partner to help out more
But did you know that actually 25% of new mums would like their partner to help out more! The first few weeks can be very exhausting. It’s important to talk about your concerns with your partner. Nothing will change if you cannot talk about it.
It’s important that you share your responsibilities. It helps to establish a light-hearted ‘Domestic AGM’. Divide the chores and keep a record of who does what. This is also a good way to see that everyone contributes and share for example feeding times.
New dad fact 4: 58% of dads would consult a healthcare professional
It’s perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed at times, especially if something seems wrong with the baby. Actually, 69% of mums would do just the same.
There is nothing wrong about asking someone for help, whether it is your own partner, family, midwives or health professionals. If you have any concerns, talk to your partner and seek advice.
Being a new parent is a big life change for both partners. Be understanding with your partner, find time to connect and share and fear not to talk to each other.
It’s an exciting but also exhausting time. Both parties should try to give their partner some alone time and help each other out.
Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net.
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