vodlemort:
achilles was the super hot popular track star and patroclus was the shy cutie who was always in the stands to cheer on his bf
and when achilles would win a race (aka every day) he’d run over to where patroclus was sitting and kiss him in front of everyone
briseis was patroclus and achilles’ third member of their little circle and basically they always hung out and patroclus would braid little flowers into hers and achilles’ hair and akjsgfasjf
and agamemnon was the douchey jock that was rude to everyone and made immature jokes so him and achilles kind of always had a rivalry
agamemnon would ask achilles to do his homework and when achilles refused agamemnon would make him “pay” by filling his or briseis’ or patroclus’ locker with soda balloons and peanut butter and ugh no one likes agamemnon ok
THETIS IS ACHILLES’ SUPER OVERPROTECTIVE (AND SLIGHTLY HOMOPHOBIC) MOTHER AND SHE HATES PATROCLUS SO WHEN ACHILLES WANTS TO HAVE HIM OVER THEY GO TO HIS DAD’S HOUSE INSTEAD AND PELEUS IS SUPER COOL WITH IT HE EVEN ASKS IF THEY WANT CONDOMS
one day (well, multiple days) achilles makes patroclus wear these shirts that odysseus made for them as a joke. achilles’ says “im aristos achaion” and patroclus’ says “im with aristos achaion”
also, briseis has one that she very reluctantly wears, and it says “im with these losers”
agamemnon is the quarterback of the football team and one day they play against a team where the quarterback is hector and hector accidentally throws the ball and it hits patroclus’ face while hes sitting in the stands. achilles gets SO mad and runs onto the field at halftime (“Achilles, sit down, it didn’t even hurt.” “I MUST AVENGE YOU PATROCLUS!”) and tackles hector
odysseus is that kid thats super nice to everyone and kind of the class clown but he also has like, all the goods. a pack of gum? odysseus has it. pencils? sure. spiked punch at prom? yes
achilles is super affectionate in school like if he sees patroclus in the hallway he’ll shout, “everyone look, its my BOYFRIEND” and patroclus loves it but he gets so embarrassed he’s like achilles stop
patroclus. wearing. a beanie.
ACHILLES ALWAYS BRINGS FIG NEWTONS FOR LUNCH
when they get detention together the teacher makes them sit on opposite sides of the room but achilles makes little paper planes with notes in them and frickin whips them toward patroclus when shes not looking
MAKING OUT BY LOCKERS. SO MUCH. EVERY DAY. ALWAYS.
basically tsoa high school au would be amazing and everyone is happy and cute and no one dies yay okay