2016-12-26

A few months ago there was a TV debate on the raw deal given to the Defence Services vis-a-vis Civil Services in 7th Central Pay Commission (7CPC).

A Military Veteran panelist complained that the 7CPC had done injustice to the Defence Services vis-a-vis the Civil Services who have much better career and pay prospects due to advantageous service-conditions/perks like Assured Career Progression (ACP), Non-Funtional Finacial Upgradation (NFU), Higher Allowances, Higher Retirement Age etc which have been denied to the Defence Services.

To counter this argument – a Politician panelist said:

“But – Defence Personnel get Subsidised Liquor – which is not given to Civil Services...”

I thought about it.

The Politician was correct.

The only exclusive perk that the Military gets is “Liquor Quota” (Liquor at Concessional Rates through CSD Canteens).

There are many various exclusive Civilian Perks like ACP, NFU, Higher Allowances, Faster Guaranteed Promotions, Retirement Age 60 years etc which are not given to Defence Personnel.

On the other hand – amost all erstwhile Defence Perks like Canteen Stores Dpartment (CSD) Canteen etc have been extended to Civilians from time to time.

Recently – CSD Canteen facilities were given to Retired Civilian Employees on par with Military Veterans.

So – the only exclusive “Military Perk” that remains is “Liquor Quota”.

However - only those Military Personnel who drink alcohol are able to derive benefit from the Liquor Quota.

Those Military Personnel who do not drink alcohol (teetotallers) are not able to benefit from this Liquor Quota – and – sadly – all military non-drinkers lose out on this exclusive perk of concessional liquor.

Also such teetotaller officers/soldiers who lose out on this Liquor Quota perk are not compensated in any way – and hence – they are totally deprived of this exclusive military perk of Liquor Quota...

Unlike various “in lieu” compensatory allowances like HRA (House Rent Allowance in lieu of Govt Accommodation) MILR (Money in lieu of Ration) etc – sadly – there is no provision for MILL (Money in lieu of Liquor).

Let’s hope that the “powers-that-be” introduce a new MILL (Money in lieu of Liquor)allowance for non-drinker teetotallers in military uniform to compensate them for the loss of being not able to derive benefit from the exclusive military perk of subsidised liquor.

While drinkers can be given their existing authorised monthly “Liquor Quota” – non-drinker teetotallers can be given “MILL” (Money in lieu of their monthly Liquor Quota)

“MILL” will be very easy to compute:

Monthly MILL Allowance = the monetary difference between civil market rate and military concessional rate for the full Monthly “Liquor Quota”.

Ha Ha - talking of “Liquor Quota” – I remembered this article I had written a few years ago...

OROQ (One Rank One Quota)

I have a contrarian view about OROP.

I feel that the “One Rank One Pension” (OROP) concept is unfair – since it links Pension to Rank.

Thus – OROP will mainly benefit High Ranking Officers.

I feel that “length of service” should be given more importance than rank while computing pension.

In fact – pension should be based on years of loyal service rendered to the nation.

Who deserves more pension:–

A Colonel with 35 years of service – or a Brigadier with 25 years of service…?

After retirement – financial needs are the same for military veterans.

I therefore feel that it is logical, equitable and ethical to give pay and pension based on the years of active service rendered in the armed forces.

However – I am a nonentity – so I have no choice but to accept this skewed concept of OROP.

If you agree with me that OROP is unjust to lower ranks – let me tell you that the concept of OROQ is even worse and more discriminatory.

The issue of OROP (One Rank One Pension) was raised only recently – but – the concept of OROQ (One Rank One Quota) is existing since time immemorial.

(In the acronym “OROQ” –  the “Quota” refers to “Booze” or “Liquor” Quota)

Sometime ago – I saw a prominent notice outside the “Liquor Section” of a Military CSD Canteen.

You must be aware that as a “perk” – Defence Services (Armed Forces), Paramilitary, and maybe, some Central/State Police Personnel – all these “faujis” are entitled to liquor at concessional rates – and probably some “part-time faujis” like Reservists, Territorial Army, NCC Officers, Defence Civilians etc also enjoy this privilege of subsidised liquor at concessional rates.

Even teetotallers get a liquor quota – which either lapses and gets wasted – or is illegally siphoned off to non-entitled civilians.

It would be a good idea to give military non-drinkers Subsidized Milk or Fruit Juice in lieu of Liquor – till such time a proper MILL (Money in lieu of Liquor) allowance for non-drinker teetotallers is introduced in the Defence Services.

Coming back to the story – on the notice board – were listed the monthly “Liquor Quotas” for various military ranks, serving and retired.

You don’t believe me...?

Have a look at the picture below showing monthly liquor quota for various ranks in units (bottles) of liquor.



Monthly CSD Liquor Quota

When I questioned this bizarre logic of OROQ – a military veteran explained that Senior Officers need to drink more alcohol to alleviate the stress due to work pressures at High Rank

(The higher the rank – the higher the stress level – and – the more the quantity of alcohol required to alleviate the stress).

Fine.

Maybe senior officers have to drink more alcohol since they are more stressed out than junior officers and soldiers.

But what about after retirement...?

Why have different “Rank Based Liquor Quotas” for Military Veterans after Retirement (and for widows/parents)...?

Crazy logic – isn’t it...?

And – once you reach the top of the ladder – do you require to drink huge quantities of booze (unlimited liquor quota) – even after retirement...?

If they say that “military intelligence” is an oxymoron – then “military logic” is an even greater oxymoron...!!! LOL

In the Defence Services – Rank Has its Privileges (RHIP) – yes – in the “military” – everything depends on rank – especially perks and privileges – even after retirement – so even the liquor quota was based on the RHIP Principle – yes – your liquor quota increases in direct proportion to your rank – the higher your rank – the more booze you get – even after retirement.

This was known to me – as I was well aware of the rank conscious “feudal” culture still prevalent in the Defence Services.

But as I read down the list – I was taken aback.

Apparently – even widows were entitled a “Liquor Quota”.

(I was not aware that widows were entitled a liquor quota – both my mother and my mother-in-law are widows of defence officers – but I have never seen them drawing liquor from the CSD Canteen)

What surprised me was that even this widow’s liquor quota was as per the deceased husband’s rank – the higher the deceased husband’s rank – the more bottles of liquor his widow was entitled every month.

As per the “Widows’ Liquor Quota” shown in the picture above – widows of Generals were entitled 7 bottles a month – for widows of other officers it was 5 bottles a month – and was 3 bottles of liquor for the rest.

I was amazed at the absurdity of this liquor quota for widows.

Firstly – was there any logic in incentivizing widows to drink liquor?

Secondly – do most widows really drink liquor?

Thirdly – do widows of senior officers require to drink more liquor than other military widows?

I wonder how many widows actually draw their monthly liquor quota – and in case of widows who regularly take their monthly liquor quota from the CSD Canteen – there are no prizes for guessing where the subsidized liquor is going.

I had seen RHIP “rank discrimination” for perks and privileges for military personnel and veterans – but to extend this RHIP concept to widows – and that too for “Widow’s Liquor Quota” – it seemed quite absurd to me – extending RHIP even after death of the “fauji”.

All these thoughts reminded me of a spoof I had written more than 3 years ago titled THE MORE YOU DRINK THE HIGHER YOU GO

So let me delve into my HUMOR IN UNIFORM archives – and pull out this spoof – and post it once more under a new title BOOZE LOGIC : “OLQ = ALCOHOL TOLERANCE LEVEL” for you to read, enjoy and mull over.

This is a “Humor in Uniform” piece – so – before you start reading the article – please read the “disclaimer”

The article is a spoof – so read it only if you have a “sense of humor” – which seems to be scarce nowadays – especially among the uniformed fraternity.

BOOZE LOGIC : OLQ = ALCOHOL TOLERANCE LEVEL

DOES DRINKING ALCOHOL IMPROVE YOUR OLQ (Officer Like Qualities)...?

or conversely

DO SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE NEED TO DRINK MORE ALCOHOL...?

MUSINGS ON LIQUOR QUOTA
A Spoof
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Disclaimer:

1. Please read this blog post only if you have a “Sense of Humor”. This is a Spoof – simple lighthearted humor – just for a laugh. So please take it with a “pinch of salt” and have a hearty laugh.

2. Serious humorless mentally straitjacketed “Service-Minded OG Types” are advised not to read this article.

3. This spoof is a work of fiction. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

RHIP (Rank Has Its Privileges) and OROQ (One Rank One Quota)

Here is one of my retirement musings on what I feel is an absurd interpretation and ludicrous implementation of the Rank Has Its Privileges or RHIP Concept.

I am posting it once more for you to read, enjoy and ponder over.

As I said, this is a spoof, for fun, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh

Cheers ... !!!

DOES DRINKING ALCOHOL IMPROVE YOUR “OFFICER LIKE QUALITIES” (OLQ)...?

Conventional wisdom says that as you grow older you should reduce your consumption of alcohol and drink less liquor.

However – the Military Canteen Stores Department (CSD) seems to think otherwise.

The more senior you become – the more booze you are supposed to drink.

Yes – your liquor quota increases according to your rank.

I am not aware of the exact liquor quota nowadays, but in our time, junior officers got about 12 bottles of booze a month, the mid-level officers got 14 bottles a month, and senior officers got 16 bottles a month, and flag officers (Admirals) got unlimited liquor.

I understand that even after retirement – Generals, Admirals and Air Marshals enjoy unlimited liquor entitlement.

Well – the number of booze bottles in the rank based liquor quotas may have changed – but the logic remains the same:

Your Liquor Quota increases in direct proportion to your Rank

Going by this Topsy-Turvy Logic one may draw the inference that the more senior you become the more liquor you are supposed to drink.

Conversely – as a corollary – one may surmise that – promotion is directly proportional to your drinking capacity or alcohol tolerance </

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