“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” ― Alexander Pope
TODAY – NOVEMBER 15th – TUESDAY
320th day of 2016 with 46 days to follow. Moon is full with 99% visible.
Holidays for Today:
~ America Recycles Day
~ Clean Your Refrigerator Day
~ I Love to Write Day
~ International Day of the Imprisoned Writer
~ National Bundt (Pan) Day
~ National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day
~ National Entrepreneurship Day (Third Tuesday)
~ National Philanthropy Day
~ National Raisin Bran Cereal Day
~ Rock Your Mocs Day
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:
1738 William Herschel, German-born British composer (24 symphonies) and astronomer (Discovered Uranus and 2 of its moons, Titania & Oberon, plus 2 moons of Saturn. Also, discovered existence of infrared radiation.)
1868 Emil Racovita, Romanian biologist, zoologist, speleologist and explorer of Antarctica (one of the most noted promoters of natural sciences in Romania)
1887 Georgia O’Keeffe, Sun Prairie, Wisconsin, painter (Cow’s Skull; chiefly painted rocks, shells, animal bones, flowers, abstract landscapes)
1887 Marianne Moore, Kirkwood, Missouri, poet (The Selected Letters of Marianne Moore; Pulitzer 1951)
1905 Mantovani, Venice Italy, orchestra leader/composer (Mantovani)
1919 Joseph Albert Wapner, Los Angeles, California, former judge (People’s Court)
1929 Edward Asner, Kansas City, Kansas, actor (Mary Tyler Moore Show, Lou Grant; Carl Fredricksen in Pixar film “Up“)
1932 Clyde McPhatter, Durham, North Carolina , singer (Why Can’t We Get Together / Mixed Up Cup, I’ll Belong to You /Book of Memories)
1940 Sam Waterston, Cambridge, Maine, actor (Law & Order, Capricorn One, Heaven’s Gate, The Killing Fields)
1966 Rachel True, New York City, New York, actress (Killing of Wendy , Pink Eye )
1973 Jesse Merz, Hood River, Oregon, actor (The Green Piece, Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey)
1973 Sydney Tamiia Poitier, Los Angeles, California, actress (Grindhouse, Knight Rider (2008 film) )
1977 Peter Mark Andrew Phillips, grandson Queen Elizabeth II (father: Mark Phillips, former Captain in the Queen’s Dragoon Guards. mother: The Princess Anne, Princess Royal, the only daughter of Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh.)
1977 Sean Murray, Bethesda, Maryland, actor (Timothy McGee / NCIS ; JAG)
1988 Zena Grey, New York, actress (The Shaggy Dog, Snow Day)
1991 Shailene Woodley, Simi Valley, California, actress (The Secret Life of the American Teenager )
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“Life is a long preparation for something that never happens.”
― W.B. Yeats
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:
1806 Explorer Lieutenant Zebulon Pike sees a distant mountain peak while near the Colorado foothills of the Rocky Mountains (it was later named Pikes Peak).
1926 NBC on-air debut with a radio network of 24 stations.
1939 In Washington, D.C., US President Franklin D. Roosevelt lays the cornerstone of the Jefferson Memorial.
1956 The first film starring Elvis Presley, Love Me Tender, is released.
1966 Gemini XII returns to Earth, splashing down safely in the Atlantic Ocean.
1967 The only fatality of the X-15 program occurs during the 191st flight when Air Force test pilot Michael J. Adams loses control of his aircraft which is destroyed mid-air over the Mojave Desert.
1969 Vietnam War: In Washington, D.C., 250,000-500,000 protesters staged a peaceful demonstration against the war, including a symbolic “March Against Death”.
1969 In Columbus, Ohio, Dave Thomas opens the first Wendy’s restaurant.
1971 Intel releases world’s first commercial single-chip microprocessor, the 4004.
1979 A package from the Unabomber Ted Kaczynski begins smoking in the cargo hold of a flight from Chicago to Washington, forcing the plane to make an emergency landing.
1985 A research assistant is injured when a package from the Unabomber addressed to a University of Michigan professor explodes.
1989 Tornado on Airport Road in Huntsville, Alabama, killing 21 people and injuring nearly 500.
1999 Popular virtual pets internet website Neopets released by British college students Adam Powell and Donna Williams.
2001 Microsoft releases the Xbox, the company’s first video game console.
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After church on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, ”Mom, I’ve decided I’m going to be a minister when I grow up.”
”That’s okay with us,” the mother said, ”But what made you decide to be a minister?”
”Well,” the boy replied, ”I’ll have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell than to sit still and listen.”
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A 20-year-old Texas man has been arrested after he stole a Coca-Cola delivery truck and filled it with stolen Pepsi. According to police, the man broke into a Corpus Christi warehouse and stole a Coke van, then drove next door to the Pepsi plant and took 47 cases from a locked Pepsi truck.
Pepsi spokeswoman Julia Koch said, “Our guess is that he just liked Pepsi and figured he could sell it easier than Coke.”
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ONE-LINERS:
~Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
~Is it true that cannibals won’t eat clowns because they taste funny?
~What was the best thing before sliced bread?
~If a mime is arrested, do they tell him he has the right to talk?
~Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?
~Do they use sterilised needles for lethal injections?
~Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they worried someone will clean them?
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A wise old farmer went to town to buy a new pickup truck that he saw advertised in the paper for a certain price.
After telling the salesman which truck he wanted, they set down to do the paperwork.
The salesman handed the farmer the bill, and the farmer declared This isn’t the price I saw!”.
The salesman went on to tell the old wise farmer how he was getting extras such as power steering, power brakes, power windows, special tires, etc. and that was what took the price up.
The farmer, needing the truck badly, paid the price and went home.
A few months later, the salesman called up the farmer and said, “My son is in 4-H and he needs a cow for a project. Do you have any for sale?”
The farmer replied, “Yes, I have a few cows I would sell for $500 apiece, Come and look at them and take your pick”.
The salesman said he and his son would be right out .
After spending a few hours in the field checking out all the farmer’s cows, the two decided on one and the salesman proceeded to write out a check for $500.
The farmer said “Now wait a minute, that’s not the final price of the cow, you’re getting extras with it and you have to pay for that too”.
“What extras?” asked the salesman. Below is the list the farmer gave the salesman for the final price of the cow
BASIC COW – 500.00
Two-tone exterior – 45.00
Extra stomach – 75.00
Product storing equipment – 60.00
Straw compartment – 120.00
4 spigots @$10 each – 40.00
Leather upholstery – 125.00
Dual horns – 45.00
Automatic fly swatter – 38.00
Fertilizer attachment – 185.00
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pic of the day: Are you Fed Up?
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
Why did the ox fall down the hill?
It was an oxident.
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How do you know when there’s a elephant under your bed?
Your nose is pressed against the ceiling.
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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?”
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Sarah was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a game on TV. Suddenly, she burst out laughing.
“Listen to this, there’s a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season tickets.”
“Hmmm,” her husband said, not bothering to look away from the game.
Sarah said teasingly, “Would you swap me for season tickets?”
“Absolutely not,” he said, “season’s more than half over.”!
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Subject: The Cure
A woman visited her new ‘Managed Care’ doctor at a Health Maintenance Organization. After about 15 minutes with one of the new doctors, she went screaming down the hall. Another doctor stopped and asked her what the problem was, and she explained.
The second doctor went back to the first and said, ‘What’s is the matter with you ? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old. She has four grown children & seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?’
The new doctor simply smiled and said: ‘Cured her hiccups though, didn’t it ?’
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How many honorary U.S. citizens are there? Honorary U.S. citizenship has been conferred only four times–to British wartime Prime Minister Winston Churchill; Swedish diplomat Raoul Wallenberg, who saved at least 20,000 Jews from the Nazis; Pennsylvania founder William Penn and his wife, Hannah; and to Mother Teresa for her work around the world caring for the sick and destitute.
~When is “Everyman’s Birthday?” In many countries, it is the custom to wish friends a “Happy Birthday” on January 1st, rather than a “Happy New Year.” This day is nicknamed “Everyman’s Birthday,” and is considered the day when everyone becomes a year older, whether it’s their actual day of birth or not. Similarly, this practice is observed in horse racing. No matter when a race horse is born, they all “become” a year older on New Year’s Day, although there are no records explaining how or why this came to be.
~How old is Bartram’s Garden? Starting from his farm near Philadelphia during the 1700s, John Bartram traveled north to Lake Ontario, south to Florida, and west to the Ohio River in search of plants and natural history specimens for his own botanic garden and for collectors at home and abroad. He and his son William are credited with identifying and introducing into cultivation more than 200 of America’s native plants. By 1765, Bartram’s international reputation earned him the notice of King George III who honored him as Royal Botanist, a position he held until his death in 1777. The Historic Bartram Garden is America’s oldest living botanical garden.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar.
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
Thought for the day. . . “there are things some people can never understand.there’s no point to telling them.” ― Chetan Bhagat