2015-04-11

NO MATTER WHAT

by Jeff Rivera

Original Book 1

Prologue

“Don’t be stupid, foo’.”

Dio shot a look towards his

homie, Spooky, who had his

jacket clenched in his fist. He

leaned back in the passenger

seat of the ’57 Chevy,

swallowing.

Thunder rumbled and rain

poured outside, making it

impossible to see out the

window. Storms scared Dio,

always did, but his mind was

set. He had to do this.

He pushed the door open

and looked at the cathedral in

front of him.

“Just keep the car runnin’,

ése,​

” he told Spooky.

Spooky was a big guy,

tattoos up and down his arm.

He normally would have

stopped Dio easy, but

tonight, nothing would stop

him. Spooky, knowing this,

just shook his head at Dio as

he walked out of the car.

Lightning illuminated the

cathedral’s majestic towers,

shining off the stained glass

windows. Dio had spent

many a night imagining this

as the place where, one day,

he’d marry his lady, Jennifer.

He’d put everything into that

dream. Now, as he yanked the

heavy oak doors open, his

heart pounded like a

sub-woofer.

He stepped inside, trying to

keep his shoes from

squeaking on the old wood

floor. The cathedral smelled

like they never really cleaned

the place, just painted over it.

The room was jam-packed

with wedding guests listening

to a children’s choir sing, their

voices echoing through the

cathedral.

Dio, who had dressed in

the best suit he could find,

weaved in between the guests,

searching for a seat while

trying to keep under the

radar. He touched his chest,

making sure the gun was still

there. Yep, his .45 caliber felt

like a brick inside that jacket

pocket.

Where was she?

Jennifer had said she loved

him since they were thirteen.

They were both eighteen

now. She had taken care of

Dio and believed in him

when nobody else did. When

his mother had threatened to

send him away, she had taken

him in. When he had

nothing but Ramen noodles

to eat, she fed him. When

he’d gotten locked up in juvie

the first time, she’d been

there, too. She promised she’d

never leave him, not ever.

“​

Estoy aqui para ti. ​

No

matter what — ​

siempre​

,”

they’d promised. And to Dio,

a promise could never be

broken.

He’d spent the entire year

changing his life around just

for her so he could be the

man she said she’d always

wanted, so he could be the

daddy his daughter needed.

They were meant to be

together, and he was going to

make Jennifer understand

that. Even if it was the last

thing he did.

He sat down in a pew as

close to the front as he could

without being detected. He

wiped the sweat of his palms

on his slacks as he sat. His

breath was stifled and his

throat was dry.

Here he was, in the church,

about to… well. He just

hoped that one day his little

brother, Daniel would

understand. Maybe one day

he, too, would find a girl that

meant the world to him, a girl

he would kill for.

The music rose and all the

heads in the chapel turned.

Everyone gasped as Jennifer

made her way down the aisle.

She was breathtaking. It had

been months since Dio had

last seen her, and she looked

even better than he’d

remembered. Olive-colored

skin, full lips. She was the

type of girl that never needed

any makeup. In fact, she

hated wearing it. Her dark

brown hair was curled; glitter

sparkled in it. She looked like

an angel.

Her fiancé was a little older

than her, a nice-looking black

man who must have been

rich, Dio thought. The one

thing he could never give her.

Jennifer lit up as she gazed at

the other man, and Dio felt

his heart break.

How could she do this to

him? How could she throw

away everything they’d had

together?

Thunder rumbled outside

but Dio’s gaze never left

Jennifer, even as the priest

rambled on with the vows.

His nose stung with unshed

tears but he held them back.

As the couple began their

vows, his blood boiled.

“I, Jennifer Lalita

Sanchez…” she said.

Dio swallowed around the

lump in his throat. He

couldn’t believe his ears. His

Jennifer was actually

promising that punk her love.

Dio looked the other way,

fighting back tears. He had to

get a grip. Across the room,

the creepy statue of Jesus

glared back at him as if saying,

“Don’t do it.”

He couldn’t stand it

anymore. His heart pounded

as he reached for the .45

caliber in his pocket, his

cohete​

. Rain pounded

against the stained-glass

windows and the roof.

He crossed himself, closed

his eyes, and prayed he was

about to do the right thing.

Chapter 1

One year earlier

“You got cotton for brains

or something? Move!” the

drill instructor shouted as the

group of guys stepped off the

prison bus, onto the hard

desert ground.

He moved nose-to-nose

with Dio. His breath smelled

like cigarettes and garlic.

Senior Jackson, they called

him, a black boar of a man,

sprayed spit with every

syllable he spoke.

Dio had a pounding

headache. Exhausted, hungry

and aching inside, he closed

his eyes and took a breath.

His heart felt like it had been

ripped out and stomped on.

It’d been over three weeks

since the accident. He didn’t

even know if Jennifer was

dead or alive.

The lunatic drill instructor

forced them to run five miles,

screaming in their faces every

step of the way.

Dio just wanted to be away

from this place, chilling with

his homies, smoking bud,

bumping the oldies. But more

than that, he wanted to be

with his lady. They called him

Playboy on the streets ‘cause

with his long hair and good

looks, all the ladies loved him,

but truth was, Dio only had

one girl in his heart: Jennifer.

She was by far the best

thing that had ever happened

to him. They’d met when

they were just thirteen at

Clark Middle School in Las

Vegas. And it was like they’d

known each other forever.

“You’re not too bright, are

you kid?” Dio remembered

his 7th grade language arts

teacher, Mr. O’Donnell

asking. He sank in his chair as

the class laughed in his face.

He only wanted to know

what a pioneer was. He didn’t

think it was such a stupid

question.

“Should we send you to

ESL?” O’Donnell asked.

The class roared with

laughter.

Dio cringed. It wasn’t like

he wasn’t trying. He just

couldn’t concentrate.

Everything on the chalkboard

looked like Chinese to him.

He needed help, but Mr.

O’Donnell made him feel like

scum every time he had a

question.

He had too many problems

at home to focus on

schoolwork, anyway. An

alcoholic mom, bruises from

her hand that he had to hide,

no food in the fridge, and a

little brother he was doing his

best to protect.

On top of that, Dio was

practically the only Mexican

in the class, except for the

skinny, nerdy little girl named

Jennifer that nobody paid any

attention to. Dio alone had to

put up with all the smack and

racist remarks.

The others didn’t know

what it was like being judged

just ’cause of the color of their

skin. Or being followed

around a store just ’cause

people automatically thought

they were going to steal stuff;

or having people lock their car

doors when they crossed the

street.

Ridiculous.

Sure, he had a temper

sometimes, but it wasn’t

always his fault. Truth was,

he wanted nothing more than

to bust these other kids’ heads

open for laughing at him, but

he needed to stay in school.

Free lunch was the only way

he could bring home enough

for his brother, Daniel, and

mom to eat.

“Are you listening?”

O’Donnell said. “Maybe we

ought to knock you back to

the 6th grade. Maybe the 4th

grade, for that matter.”

The kids busted out

laughing and O’Donnell

shook his head, rummaging

through his paperwork.

Dio squinted his eyes as fire

began burning in the pit of

his stomach. His nose flared.

Then Dio swore he saw

O’Donnell mouth the word,

“Mexicans.”

What happened next, he

didn’t quite remember. But

when he came to, Mr.

O’Donnell was on the floor,

holding a bloody nose. The

next thing he knew, Dio was

in the principal’s office being

screamed at.

“We do whatever we can to

accommodate you people in

our classes!” the principal

shouted.

Dio stared at the floor,

biting his nails.

This was it. He was going

to get kicked out of another

school again, and this time,

there were no more options.

He’d end up a dropout.

Without an education, he was

going to end up flipping

burgers for the rest of his life,

and he’d never get any of his

dreams accomplished. He’d

become the very thing people

assumed he would.

“It’s not his fault,” said a

squeaky voice. It was Jennifer,

pushing her glasses up her

nose as she stepped into the

principal’s office.

“Excuse me?” the principal

said.

“I wanted to punch Mr.

O’Donnell myself,” Jennifer

said.

Dio blinked and a smile

curved on his face. Little girl

had ​

cojones​

. Even when the

principal began yelling at her,

she didn’t back down.

Instead, she fought back,

mouthing off and telling him

the school was going to be

sued for discrimination.

Before long, they were both

suspended. It was better than

being expelled. Dio had never

really had anyone stick up for

him before. Jennifer had

never spoken to him before.

In fact, he couldn’t remember

her ever saying anything to

anyone.

They sat outside the

Principal’s office for an hour,

while Mr. O’Donnell was

being shouted at for his

“inappropriate behavior.”

Dio gave Jennifer daps.

“​

La Raza​

,” he said, trying to

keep it cool.

She smiled.

From that day on, Dio and

Jennifer had become best

friends. They were

inseparable. Besides his boys,

she was the only real friend he

had. Like him, she had a hard

life, and when things got bad,

they’d hide in her treehouse

and eat Rolos chocolates.

She’d sing to him with the

most beautiful voice, and

they’d talk about their dreams

of making it out of the barrio.

But then they were

separated. Dio’s mother

kicked him out of the house

for sticking up for his little

brother when she went into

another one of her drunken

rages, and he was lost in the

foster care system until he was

seventeen, bounced from

home to home. He thought

he’d never see Jennifer again.

Then, just months ago,

they had been reunited. They

picked up where they left off,

only this time, they fell in

love.

Gone was the skinny nerdy

girl he remembered. Gone

were the glasses. No, Jennifer

was hot now. She’d filled out

in all the right places, started

wearing contacts, and was the

most beautiful girl he’d ever

seen in his life.



Now, as the drill instructor

forced the prisoners to run

around the boot camp like

mules, it drove Dio l ​

oco​ not knowing if she was okay.

There had been an

accident, a really bad one, and

it was Dio’s fault. He didn’t

know if Jennifer was alive or

dead, his mind was going

crazy, and now he had this

insane man barking orders at

them like he was their daddy

or something. Dio could tell

nobody said, “No” to Senior

Jackson unless they wanted to

get their butt kicked.

“Halt!” the drill instructor

yelled.

Most of the trainees didn’t

have a clue what he meant

but they figured he must be

telling them to stop.

Thank God. Maybe now I

can rest,​

Dio thought.

He felt like his stomach,

lungs and everything else

would come spewing out of

his mouth at any moment.

The only one who looked

more pitiful than him was

this skinny mulatto kid that

Jackson called Simon. He

wondered how the kid

managed to look at himself in

the mirror every day. Yeah, it

was that bad. Coke-bottle

glasses and more zits than Dio

had ever seen on one person.

“Stand up, trainee,” Jackson

told Dio, flipping through his

clipboard as Dio keeled over,

catching his breath.

“I can’t,” Dio said.

“I? Who is I? You’re…

Trainee Radigez. Get up,

now!”

“Hold up, a’ight? Jeez.” Dio

said. The words came out of

his mouth before he realized

the big mistake he’d just

made. Jackson came at him

like a semi.

“Who the hell do you think

you’re talking to, boy? What’s

the third general rule from

your manual?”

Dio was supposed to have

memorized some fifty-page

manual with all these

ridiculous rules. But that was

the last thing that was on his

mind.

“I don’t know,” Dio

responded, smacking his lips.

“You tell me.”

“You’re cruisin’ for a brusin’

aren’t you, Trainee? ‘Sir,

Trainee Radigez doesn’t

know, Senior Jackson, sir!’

That’s what you say!”

“Sir, Trainee Rodríguez

don’t know, Senior Jack-Up,

sir,” Dio answered back. He

could feel the stares of the

other trainees. He hated when

people stared at him.

“You a slow learner,

Radigez?” Jackson asked,

shoving his finger at Dio’s

head. “Think, Trainee, think!”

If he touches me one more

time…

“It’s Rodríguez, not

Radigez,” Dio spat back.

Jackson stepped even closer

to him. “You correcting me,

boy? You don’t eat, sleep, or

breathe unless I tell you to.

You hear?”

Dio smacked his lips.

“Whatever,” he mouthed.

Before Jackson could say

more, an ugly mutt came out

of nowhere and moved right

up to Jackson’s side. It

growled and barked. Jackson

smiled, patting it on the side.

The dog looked like someone

had run over it with a car

several times, put it through

the spin cycle in a washing

machine, then hit it with an

ugly stick.

“Cool it, squad. This is

Coffee and she don’t take no

smack from nobody. Now,

listen up. You got three levels

to get past in this camp and

half of you won’t make it past

the first. If there’s one thing I

can’t stand, it’s dummies.

And this squad is full of

them. Some more than

others,” he said, looking

directly at Dio. “And now,

I’m going to work the

dummy right out of you. Hit

dirt and give me fifty. Now!”

They dropped to give him

his push-ups. Dio couldn’t

believe it. ​

More? Couldn’t he

see they were exhausted?

“There is no fun here,”

Jackson continued, pacing

back and forth with Coffee

trailing behind. “If you’re not

working, you’re in school,

studying. And every night if

you’re not in your bunks

sleeping, you’re reading the

general rules or the

dictionary. The next time

you don’t know a word, look

it up. Do I make myself clear,

trainees?”

They stuttered, then said,

“Sir, yes sir!”

“Sound like a bunch of

losers. Are you a bunch of

losers, Trainee Grossaint?” he

stopped in front of a white

kid with ice-blue eyes and

chiseled features, diligently

doing push-ups as if he were

reading a book.

“Sir, no sir,” he responded.

“You sure about that,

Grossaint? ‘Cause it don’t

sound like it.”

Dio felt as if he was going

to cough up his lungs at any

moment. His body quivered

with each push-up. He still

had forty-five to go.

Jackson got in his face,

“That’s not even a girl

push-up.”

The mutt barked in Dio’s

face and the trainees

chuckled, which only burned

Dio up more. He loved dogs

but ​

they were about to find a

missing dog somewhere if she

kept it up​

.

“Put some effort into it. My

dead grandma could do a

better job!” Jackson

announced.

“I’m … Trainee Rodríguez

is trying, sir,” Dio answered.

“Trying? You either do it or

you don’t. You are a pathetic

excuse for a boy.” Jackson

stuck his weathered boots

under Dio’s chin. “When

your chin hits these boots,

then that’s a push-up. Start

over. One … two…”

Now, it could have been

the dung smell of Jackson’s

boots; who knows? But when

it happened, Dio never felt

more embarrassed in his life.

His last meal and

everything else poured out of

his mouth in chunks right on

Jackson’s boots.

“What the …? Grossaint,

get over here,” Jackson yelled,

restraining Coffee from

licking his boots.

Grossaint hustled over to

his side. “Sir, yes, sir!”

“This look like puke to you,

Grossaint? Why is there puke

on my boots?”

“Sir, cause Trainee

Radigez-”

“No, no and no! There’s

puke on my boots ’cause you

haven’t cleaned it off yet. Do

it, now!”

Grossaint dropped to his

knees. “Sir, how-?”

“Use your shirt, dummy,”

Jackson answered. Grossaint

grimaced but scurried after

Jackson on his knees, cleaning

the vomit off as he

approached Dio.

Dio was beyond

embarrassed but kept his

tough facade as Jackson stood

nose-to-nose with him and

whispered, “How do you feel

now, Radigez?”

All that could be heard was

the trainees breathing and

Grossaint scrubbing Jackson’s

boots. Jackson’s dark eyes

peered right through Dio’s

soul, but he lifted his chin

defiantly.

“Sir, fine. Feeling fine now,

sir,” Dio answered.

“One way or another,

you’re going to learn. I will

win. I always do,” Jackson

said, cracking a smile. Then

he resumed his normal

top-of-his lungs voice. “And

since Trainee Radigez is ​

so

tired, you’re all going to run

for him. Five more miles!”

The other guys glared at

Dio. “Sir, yes sir!” they

answered.

“You just sit there and relax,

Radigez. Don’t worry,” he

said with a crafty smile,

“They’ll take care of

everything.”

Coffee barked in

agreement.

Chapter 2

Dio was beat by the time

they got into their large tent,

where they had nothing but

hard as rock bunks on the

cold desert ground. Dio had

slept on floors more

comfortable.

Nothing’s colder than

winter in Las Vegas; the type

that clings to your bones. It

was even colder for Dio right

now, since the drill

instructors had shaved off five

years of his long locks.

He wasn’t about to give

them the pleasure of seeing

how the haircut was tearing

him apart. The icy breeze

flowed over his bald head

with every step he took.

Everyone in the squad

avoided him and those that

did look his way only glared.

Whatever. He didn’t need

them. He didn’t need

anybody. Still, it was times

like these that he wished he

were laying next to Jennifer.

He thought about how they’d

be whispering and laughing

all night long, knowing if her

parents ever found out he had

snuck in, they’d have him

arrested. They had always

hated him, but Jennifer saw

past his long hair and tattoos.

She never laughed when he

said he wanted to get out of

the gang and make something

of himself.

They both had dreams and

they were the only ones that

47

could confide in each other

about them. He thought

they’d be together forever.

Grossaint’s ice-blue eyes

followed him as he tried to

pull back the paper-thin

sheets. He’d only been in

camp a few days and already

he’d made enemies. One of

Grossaint’s friends, Trainee

Franklin, they called him,

whispered something. Dio

imagined it couldn’t be a

good thing.

He wanted to teach them

some respect but he was too

tired. He tossed and turned,

switching the so-called pillow

over.

He wanted to be near

Jennifer so badly. She was the

only thing that kept him sane.

If he could just get to a

phone, just for five minutes.

He needed to hear her voice

again.

His mind trailed off, and he

was about to doze off when

the whimpering and sobbing

began.

“Shut up!” the trainees

yelled. It was Simon.

What was he crying about?

Dio wondered.

Simon went on like that all

night long and just as Dio was

about to sleep, Senior Jackson

was in his face screaming,

“Rise and shine, Radigez!”

Chapter 3

Dio felt stuck in a

never-ending gym hell. One

hundred push-ups, two

hundred sit-ups, two miles of

running, and whatever else

Jackson could think up every

morning. Then Jackson

demanded they clean the

walls, ceilings, floors, the

cracks and corners all with a

toothbrush.

With Coffee tracking dirt

in and out of the hall, leaving

“gifts” all over the place, it

didn’t make it any easier.

“I want to see myself in the

reflection,” Jackson said,

pointing to the floors.

Dio’s knees were raw from

scrubbing the floor, his neck

was throbbing, but all he

could think about was

Jennifer. Jackson was about to

step away when Dio mustered

up the courage to ask, “Um …

Sir, Trainee Rodríguez

requests permission to speak,

sir.”

“What?” Jackson spat.

“Sir, Trainee Rodríguez was

wondering if he could … use

the phone for a minute or

two, sir.”

Jackson laughed in his face.

“You are asking me for a

favor, Radigez?”

“Sir, Trainee Rodríguez’s

girlfriend is in the hospital,

sir.” His voice cracked with

emotion.

“No!” Jackson bellowed.

“You want phone privileges,

you gotta earn them.”

With that, Jackson kicked a

dirty pail over and splashed it

on the walls.

“Do it over. Mess up one

more time, Radigez, and I’ll

make you wish you were

never born.”

As Dio set to work again,

his nose stinging, Grossaint

crawled up next to him,

careful the junior drill

instructor didn’t spot him.

“He’s a jerk,” Grossaint said.

It was the first time he’d ever

said anything to Dio and he

didn’t know what to make of

it.

“We should be able to use

the phone anytime we want,”

he added.

“Yeah, it’s our right,” his

friend Franklin agreed.

Was Grossaint actually

trying to make friends?

Maybe he wasn’t as bad of a

guy as Dio had thought.

“​

Simón​

,” Dio whispered,

nodding in agreement.

Grossaint nodded toward

Jackson’s office. The door was

slightly open.

“Just use the phone quick.

We got your back,” Grossaint

eyed the junior officer,

stepping away. “Go now,

before he gets back.”

“Yeah, we’ve got your

back,” Franklin said.

Grossaint and Franklin

were right. If he was going to

do it, now was the time. Even

if he got caught, they’d only

make him do more push-ups

or something. Jennifer was

worth the risk.

Dio slipped inside the

office and Grossaint gave him

a reassuring nod.

He grabbed the phone and

yanked it under the desk with

him. Heart pounding, he

called 4-1-1 and then the

hospital connected him to

Jennifer’s room.

He just needed to know, to

hear her voice. She was his

soul mate; the only one he

had really left in the world. If

anything ever happened to

her, Dio would never forgive

himself.

“Hello,” Jennifer’s voice was

dry and weak.

He was like a little kid

again, talking faster than his

mind could keep up with.

“Baby, you all right? I’m in

this camp. This prison boot

camp and they don’t let me

do nothing but I’ve been

praying every night. You

okay? I miss you so bad.”

She didn’t answer right

away, which only made him

more worried.

“Got shot,” she said.

“I know baby, but stay

strong. Okay?”

“Dio,” whatever she had to

say was painful, “You know I

care for you, don’t you? I

mean, we’ll always have a

connection but …”

“But what?”

She sounded like she was

holding back the tears. “I can’t

live like this anymore, Dio.

Mi familia​

is right. I’ve got to

do better. You and me, it’s

over.”

It felt like a truck had

landed on his chest. He

struggled for breath for a

moment. Then he said,

“Baby, we’re soul mates.

Don’t do me like this.”

There was a silence on the

phone for what seemed like

forever.

“Baby?” Dio said.

“Try to understand,” she

responded.

Click.

Dio rocked back on his

heels. For the first time in his

life, he didn’t have a friend in

the world. No one.

He was alone.

His nose pinched and he

could feel the tears starting to

well up, but he wasn’t about

to punk out. Instead he

punched a wall. He must be

dreaming. Jennifer would

never just drop him like a…

Suddenly Coffee was there,

barking in his face.

“What are you doing in my

office?” Jackson shouted,

grabbing him by the collar

and pulling him down the

hall so fast he didn’t know

what hit him.

He looked back at

Grossaint and Franklin. They

were both smirking.

Chapter 4

Dio had never been in an

adult prison before, let alone

in what they called the “hole.”

It was solitary confinement,

as dark as night, and for

someone who still had

nightmares about being

locked in a toy box by his

mother, it was horrible. Dio

remembered that day clearly.

He had been just thirteen.

“You stupid, stupid, stupid

boy,” his mom had said. He

looked away, but she had him

cornered against the wall. He

could smell the tequila on her

breath.

“You’re trying to break up

this family, aren’t you?”

“No,” Dio said.

She slapped him across the

face sharply. “Liar.”

He bit his lip. She was mad

at him because one of the

teachers had seen one of the

bruises she gave him, and the

burn scar she’d made on him

from the iron.

“What did you tell that

teacher? Tell me!” she

screamed at the top of her

lungs.

“Nothing.”

She grabbed him by the

chin and shoved his face back

against the wall. “I don’t let

little liars in my house, Dio.

You want to be on the street

again tonight? Huh? Let

those bums you hang out

with take care of you. See if

they want you. ‘Cause I sure

don’t.”

Dio’s nose flared. “Good,

’cause I don’t want you,

either. You’re a horrible

mother.”

Her hand came across his

face so fast, he didn’t know

what hit him. She didn’t let

up, over and over and over

again, until he was on the

floor in a fetal position.

That was the night she

made him sleep in the toy box

again. It was either that or

she’d do something awful to

his little brother.

Dio only hoped Daniel

wasn’t going through the

same thing now, without him

there to protect the little boy.

The worst part was that here,

Dio had little to think of

besides Jennifer’s rejection.

His pride said forget about

her; that he didn’t need her

anymore, but the truth was,

he didn’t want anybody else.

Living without Jennifer was

like living without a piece of

his soul.

Grossaint was definitely

going to get it, one way or

another. After all, as Spooky

always said, “They hit you,

you gotta hit ‘em worse.”

Chapter 5

“What now?!” Louise, the

boot camp’s cook, cried as

Dio came in. Then she looked

at him and sighed. “Another

trainee to babysit.”

She looked like trailer trash,

as far as Dio was concerned,

with her stringy, badly

permed hair, no makeup, a

pruned-up, wrinkled face,

and hardly any front teeth.

Dio winced away from her as

she led him to a mountain of

dishes bigger than he’d ever

seen before.

“Well, get at it,” she said.

Dio sighed. The last thing

he wanted to do was this kind

of work. He’d hated seeing his

mom come home exhausted

after working as a janitor and

dishwasher, Daniel crying

because he was so hungry. It

was hardly a wonder his

mother would rather be in a

drunken stupor most of the

time.

That’s what led Dio to

“alternative means of

income.” What was the big

deal about selling a little

dope, if it was going to keep

his mom from one more job

and his brother from going

hungry? At least that was

how he used to justify it. In

reality, it was the last thing he

wanted to do.

He wiped the steam off his

sweaty brow and noticed

Simon, the zit-faced kid from

earlier, holding a broom, and

gawking at him with his

mouth wide open.

“Whatchew want, foo’?”

Dio asked, “Yeah, just keep

sweepin’.”

Simon shuffled away and

Dio shook his head.

It took him forever but he

finally finished that mountain

of dishes, wiped the sweat off

his brow, and sighed with

relief. At least now he could

rest.

“Did I say you could take a

break?” Louise asked, startling

him as she came up from

behind with an even bigger

load of dishes for him. Then

other trainees from the squad

brought in load after load. It

was going to be a long day.

Chapter 6

Dio was more than

exhausted after all that work,

but then Grossaint entered

the tent. Dio’s hands itched

to break his nose.

Days in the hole. All that

kitchen work. Getting his

phone privileges revoked

forever so he’d never be able

to call Jennifer? It was all

Grossaint’s fault and he was

going to make him pay for it.

“I’ma mess you up, homie,”

Dio threatened, moving

toward him.

Grossaint cracked a smile;

his cronies surrounded Dio.

“Stupid wetback,”

Grossaint snarled, looking at

Franklin as they moved in on

Dio.

Dio was ready to take them

on when a high-pitched voice

cried, “Leave him alone!’

Everyone looked around

for the source of the sound,

then snickered when they saw

Simon. He trembled like a

little boy who knew he had a

whipping coming.

“Don’t bother him,” he

squeaked.

Dio was shocked. This

scrawny little thing was

coming to his defense? What

was he going to do, slap them

to death?

“Shut up, Simon,”

Grossaint replied.

His boys laughed.

“You shut up,” Simon

answered. Then he shrank

back like a turtle in his shell.

Grossaint was about to do

something when Franklin

yelled, “Officer on deck!”

Everyone scurried to their

bunks as Jackson marched

inside.

Jackson seemed to sense

something was off and

immediately went to what he

thought had to be the source

of the trouble. “Radigez,

what’s going on here?”

“Sir, nothing sir,” Dio

answered.

Jackson stared him up and

down, then asked Simon,

swift as a sword, “That true?”

Simon swallowed hard.

“Uh—”

“Sir, you got a phone call,” a

junior officer called.

Saved by the bell.

Everyone held their breath

until he exited.

Dio knew he had to chill

for now. Grossaint’s revenge

would have to come another

night.

He lay in bed, thinking

about what Simon had done.

There was a courage about

him Dio liked, one that his

best homies back home had.

He decided then to sit up

and write Jennifer a letter. If

he couldn’t use the phone,

hopefully he could get

through to her that way.

He grabbed a pen and

paper from the box in front

of his bunk.

Dear Jennifer,

Every day I wake up in

the middle of the night and

mi corazon me duele, ’cause

I know everything that

happened to you is my

fault. Please, don’t let what

other ​

foos​

people say make

you not want to be with

me. If I could do it all over

again, I would, but I can’t.

You gotta understand

what I’ve been going

through, too. Nobody

would tell me if you was

alive or dead or nothing.

When I heard your voice

on the phone I a ​

lmost cried

about broke down. I’ve

been dying inside every

night thinking about you.

Don’t give up on me.

You’re the only one I got

besides mi hermanito.

When I get out things are

going to be so much better.

You’ll see. Just give me

another chance, I’ll prove it

to you. Estoy aqui para ti.

No matter what siempre.

Remember?

Playboy

Chapter 7

The whole next day

Jackson had them digging

ditches. Why? Because he said

it built indefatigability.

“Do you know what

indefatigability is, Radigez?”

he asked.

“Um … muscles?” Dio

answered.

“So, we got jokes, do we?

No, no, and no!” Jackson

responded. “Indefatigability is

being seemingly incapable of

being fatigued. You build

stamina; you don’t get so

tired.”

Well, whoop-dee-doo!

Who cares?​

Dio thought.

An older squad of guys

wearing all white passed by.

They were in the last level,

ready to graduate.

“What are you looking at?”

Jackson asked, “Half you guys

won’t even make it past this

level.”

Dio just wanted to get out

of camp. With any luck, he

would get a legitimate job

doing something that would

make Jennifer proud to be

with him. He still hadn’t

heard back from her, even

though it’d been weeks, but

he just knew that if he could

make it out of boot camp and

get his life together, he could

win her back.

Dio wiped his brow. It was

winter in the desert, but

during the day it was just as

hot as any other time of the

year.

He looked over his

shoulder to see Simon

struggling beside him.

“Hey,” Dio called, careful

nobody else could hear.

“We’re not supposed to be

talking,” Simon whispered in

his high-pitched, nasally

voice.

Dio smacked his lips. “That

foo’s not going to do nothing

to me he ain’t done already.”

Simon’s eyes lit up a bit.

“I appreciate you sticking

up for me last night. It was

coo’,” Dio said. “It was stupid,

but it was coo’.”

A smile spread across

Simon’s face, “Thanks!”

“Shh,” Dio cautioned. “So,

what are you? Black, Iraqi or

what?”

“My dad’s black and my

mom’s Hispanic.”

“For real? That almost

makes us brothers.”

“It does?” Simon asked with

a smile.

“​

Simón. ​

Us brownskins

gotta stick together, ​

sabes​

? ​

La

Raza​

, dawg. That’s why you

gotta help me get back at

Grossaint somehow. Hey,

whatchew in here for,

anyway?”

Dio thought he was too

skinny to be in a gang, too

prude to hotwire a car. Simon

withdrew. Whatever he’d

done, he was too ashamed to

talk about it.

“Come on, foo’. You can

tell me. I got in here for

possession of a firearm.

Wrong place, wrong time.

Foos tried to blast me in a

drive-by but got my girl

instead. It’s a’ight. I’ma get

out and me and her gonna get

back together like nobody’s

business. ​

Órale​

.”

“​

Órale​

? I don’t speak

Spanish,” Simon said.

Dio shook his head. “​

Órale.

Simón​

. You know. That’s like

saying, ‘That’s live. That’s

money.’”

Simon still looked

confused.

“You know, ‘That’s cool,

dude.’”

The lightbulb came on in

his head and Simon smiled

and nodded his head like a

bobblehead doll.

“​

Órale. Simón​

,” he

repeated.

Chapter 8

Jackson always had some

new brainiac idea, and since it

was Grossaint’s birthday,

everyone had to make him a

gift. Dio thought he’d give

him a birthday gift to

remember for a long time.

For some strange reason,

Jackson’s dog Coffee had

taken a liking to Grossaint.

No matter how many times

he pushed her away,

threatened her, or pulled her

by the tail, she was completely

in love with him.

So that day, Dio

approached Grossaint as he

ripped his gifts open. He

glared at Dio handed his gift

to him and opened the

package as if it were a bomb.

Seeing nothing more than a

homemade card, he crumpled

it in his hand, tossed it aside,

and continued opening the

other presents.

“Chow time!” a junior

officer yelled.

Everyone got up, put their

shoes on, and headed out.

When Grossaint did the

same, however, his shoes

squelched. He sat back down

and pulled them off to find a

funky smell and gush in his

shoes, one of Coffee’s “gifts.”

“What the—” Grossaint

exclaimed.

Dio and Simon walked by

him, trying not to laugh.

Then Simon blew it by

saying, “Happy birthday.”

Dio nudged him. “Stupid.

Keep it on the down-low.”

Grossaint’s teeth gritted, his

face beet red with anger. Dio

knew he was in for it,

something big this time. It

was no longer fun and games.

It was war.

Chapter 9

Dio couldn’t open

Jennifer’s letter quick enough.

He was supposed to be

cleaning out the grease traps

in the kitchen but instead

stole a few minutes to read.

Dear Dio,

It took me a long time to

write this letter because the

medicine they put me on

makes me sick to my

stomach. You say you’re

sorry, you say you care for

me pero no te creo. I think

you’re selfish​

all you think

about is yourself.

You don’t know what it’s

like to constantly have to

defend you to all my

friends. It’s too much for

me. They say the bullet

almost hit mi corazon. I

should have been dead but

an angel ​

someone’s

watching over me and I can

only think it’s like a second

chance, and I’ve got to do

things right this time.

I want to believe this

time it will be different,

that you will change but

everything you’d said you’d

do, you haven’t done. You

said you’d quit banging,

that you’d quit selling, that

you’d ​

buy me a real

engagement ring​

go back to

school but I don’t see any

of that. When I see you in

a tie and shirt and you’ve

got a real job, then I’ll

believe you.

Jennifer

The letter tore Dio apart.

Part of him was just glad she’d

written back, but he wanted

so badly for her to forgive

him. He knew what had

happened was serious, that

his past had caught up to

both of them. And not that

he was totally surprised by

her reaction, but to hear her

say things like that just hurt.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake!”

Louise yelled from the other

room. Dio shook his head

and got up to go back to

work. Then, he thought he

heard a sniffle.

Frowning, he wiped his

hands and followed the

sound. Louise was standing in

the pantry, her back turned

and arms folded. Dio cleared

his throat.

“You all right?”

“Mind your own business

and get back to work,” she

snapped.

“Whatever,” Dio said,

turning to leave. Discomfort

prickled over his skin. He

hated to see a woman cry.

Then he thought of

something. He left for a

moment, heading outside to a

nearby flowerbed, and then

returned to the pantry.

Approaching Louise with

caution as she sobbed, Dio set

a violet down beside her. As

he turned to leave, her voice

stopped him.

“Hey, get over here,” she

said.

“Yeah?” he answered,

turning around.

“You trying to be sweet to

me or something? Whatchew

want?” she asked, wiping her

eyes.

“I don’t want nothing,” he

said, smacking his lips.

She grunted. “Well, you

ain’t gonna get nothing out of

it.”

“Whatever,” he said. It was

probably just as hard for her

to say, “Thank you” as it

would be for him.

“I’m not trying to get up in

your business or nothing,” he

said, “but what’s the matter,

anyway?”

“Don’t get married, that’s

what’s the matter,” she said.

“Ah, relationships. I know

how that goes,” he said,

leaning against a counter.

“What do you know about

relationships?” she said,

turning and putting her

hands on her hips.

He bit his thumbnail and

said, “Got female problems,

that’s what.”

“What kind of female

problems?”

“My girl’s mad at me right

now.” He shrugged.

“She got a reason?”

Dio grunted. “I just want it

to be like it used to.”

Louise started putting

things away again, her tears

apparently gone. “Well,

relationships fade,” she said.

“Not me and Jennifer,” he

said, standing up straighter.

“We’re soul mates. We’re just

going through a bit of a

rough patch.”

Dio took the letter out of

his pocket. “I know I’m not

supposed to bring nothing to

work but… she said it right

here, in this letter. She don’t

want nothing to do with me.

She don’t know how much I

love her. You’re not gonna

narc on me, are you?”

“Just read the darn letter,”

she grunted.

As Dio read it to her, she

listened carefully. When he

had finished, she laughed and

went back to putting the cans

in their spots. “Well, sounds

like she still wants you to me.”

“For real?” he asked, his

eyebrows raising.

“Listen to what she’s

saying!”

When Dio frowned, Louise

made an impatient noise,

“Give me that,” she said,

snatching the letter from him.

She began reading: “‘When I

see you in a tie and shirt and

you’ve got a real job…’ She

wants you, but you gotta get

it together. Isn’t that what

she’s saying here?”

“For real?” he repeated, his

eyes lighting up. “You think

I’ve got a chance?”

“‘For real’? Of course ‘for

real.’ You’re talking to a

woman here.” She laughed

again. Then she turned

serious, her eyes soft. “Listen,

if you really love her, don’t let

her get away. Write her back.

You still got a chance.”

“What should I say?” he

asked, stepping towards

Louise with his fists clenched

anxiously.

“You’ll know,” Louise

answered. “You love her, after

all.”

Chapter 10

Dio thought long and hard

about everything Louise had

said as he sat on his bunk that

night, drawing a picture of

Jennifer. Jennifer had always

encouraged him to draw and

she knew it was the one thing

he was passionate about. It

allowed him to escape

whatever he was going

through at school or with his

mom.

Now, as he traced the last

details of his vision of

Jennifer, he was lost in her,

lost in what could be.

No matter how ticked off

he felt sometimes about her

trying to break up with him,

he couldn’t help himself. He

was in love with her. And

though he’d never tell Spooky

or any of his boys back home,

it was the truth. She was the

only one for him. He wanted

her and he was willing to fight

for her.

He knew he couldn’t

procrastinate forever, drawing

the same lines over and over

again, so finally he decided to

get to writing.

Dear Jennifer,

Sometimes the things I

mean in my head don’t

exactly come out the way

they’re supposed to. You

know if I was there right

now, I’d be lying next to

you, ​

hugging​

holding you.

I’d be stroking your pelo,

kissing you, making you

feel good. You know that’s

all I think about here, being

with you. It’s the only thing

that gets me through d

​ ay

each day. My heart pounds

every time they pass out the

mail ’cause I’m hoping I’ll

get something from you.

That’s what you do to

me, baby. You make my

heart pound. I know you’re

going to pull through in

the hospital and when I get

out things are going to be

better ​

much better​

. You’ll

see.

Oh! I almost forgot.

Don’t know if you’re

feeling up to it or if the

doctors will let you, but

visitor’s day is coming up

next Friday at 6pm. Think

you can come?

Playboy

“Whatcha doing?” Simon

asked then.

“You messin’ my vibe,

man,” Dio snapped.

Simon backed away like he

had just been slapped across

the face, which only made

Dio feel bad.

“I’m just writing my lady,”

Dio grunted, repositioning

himself on his bunk.

“Can I see?” Simon asked,

peering over Dio’s shoulder.

“Man, don’t you got no girl

of your own? Jeez.”

“No,” Simon answered,

staring at the dirt floor.

“Homie, you gotta learn to

strut. You can’t slump around

all the time. How you expect

to get no respect?”

“Yeah, listen to him. He’ll

teach you a thing or two,”

Grossaint called out, making

everyone laugh.

“Foo,’” Dio said, “I ain’t in

the mood for you.”

Dio started for him but

Coffee got up and started

growling. Grossaint smiled at

the dog. “Good girl.”

Simon tugged at Dio. “It’s

not worth it. They’ll just send

you back to the hole. Think

about your girl.”

Dio hated to admit it but

Simon was right.

“You think you’re so smart

but you’re in camp just like

the rest of us,” Dio said to

Grossaint as he backed away.

“At least I’m going

somewhere when I get out.

You’ll just be stuck in the

ghetto,” Grossaint responded.

Dio smacked his lips. “Foo’,

soon as I get out, I’ma be an

artist with my own car design

shop.”

Grossaint snorted. “You’re

dreaming.”

“Yeah?” Dio challenged. “At

least I’m not going back to the

trailer park with my Ma and

Pa and girlfriend. I mean,

sister.”

The squad busted out

laughing, which took Dio by

surprise.

“I gotta girl at home,”

Grossaint said, pulling

himself up. “And at least she

ain’t some dumb street rat like

yours.”

“Oooh,” the guys groaned

as one, looking on eagerly.

“Yeah? Least she ain’t as

dumb as your mama. Your

mama so dumb, if she spoke

her mind, she’d be

speechless.”

The guys busted out

laughing.

“Your mama so dumb,”

Dio continued. “Wait … she

had you.”

Everyone roared in

laughter. Dio had a whole

bunch of “Yo’ Mama” jokes

lined up for Grossaint but he

could see he’d struck a chord

in him. So he didn’t bother to

push it anymore, not today.

Chapter 11

Dio stayed up the whole

night before that Friday’s

Visitor’s Day, thinking about

seeing Jennifer again. He

hadn’t gotten a letter back

from her yet, but he knew

Jennifer. She’d get mad at

things, but she got over them.

He figured she’d definitely

show up one way or another.

But the next day in the

visitor’s room, he waited until

no other trainees were left

except him and Simon.

“Where’s your girl, Dio?”

Simon finally asked.

“She’ll be here. You’ll see…”

Dio answered, not wanting to

look at him. “Where’s your

mom and dad?”

Simon shrugged.

“They just missing out,”

Dio said.

Simon sniffled. “Yeah.”

“Who needs them? They

don’t show up, you don’t

want them to show up,” Dio

added.

Simon’s eyes watered.

“Yeah. I gotta go to the

bathroom.”

Simon trailed off to ask

Jackson to use the head.

Poor kid​

, Dio thought.

What parent wouldn’t want a

kid like that?

As the hour progressed, the

other trainees’ guests came

and went. Even Grossaint had

a guest, some big guy that

looked like he could have

been his brother.

Finally, there were no

guests left and Dio was left

completely embarrassed. The

squad gave him a

“you-didn’t-get-anybody-to-vi

sit-you?” look while they lined

up, waiting for Jackson to

give them permission to go.

He kept his chin up, looking

straight ahead, but his pride

was crumbling.

Jackson came up to him

and spoke in a low tone.

“Where’s this lady friend of

yours you were talking

about?”

Dio frowned, clenching his

fists.

Chapter 12

It had been three weeks

since he had heard from

Jennifer. Was she trying to

forget him? It wasn’t like her

to do something like this.

Yeah, maybe he’d messed up

real bad but she had to know

he’d do anything for her.

He felt like he was just

going through the motions at

boot camp. Why even try that

hard? What good was life

without Jennifer?

Nothing was more

obnoxious than those

obstacle courses Jackson made

them do. They were supposed

to be making some

improvement each time, but

Dio didn’t get the whole

point.

To be honest, he barely

tried. He just needed to stay

under the radar long enough

to graduate from camp in a

few months and get out.

“Chow time,” Jackson

announced to the exhausted

trainees.

Excitement spread among

them as they lined up for

food. It was about time, as far

as Dio was concerned. He

was starving to death and

couldn’t wait to eat.

“Go ahead, everyone!

Except you, Radigez.”

Dio froze. ​

Now what?

“Sir?” Dio said, staying put

where he was.

“Get over here. What do

you think you’re doing today?

My dead grandmother could

do a better job.”

“Sir, Trainee Rodríguez is

just doing what you told him,

sir.”

“No, no, and no! Need I

remind you, if I don’t see any

improvement, your sentence

will be extended.”

Dio sighed, muttering

something under his breath.

Jackson charged into his

face. “What’d you say? What’s

the tenth general rule?”

“Sir, all trainees must do

their very best, but Trainee

Rodríguez was doing his best,

sir.”

“Your best? That was your

best? You want to ever see

that girl of yours again or

what?”

“Sir, ‘course I … Trainee

Rodríguez does, sir.”

“Hit dirt and give me one

hundred.”

“Sir?”

There was no way it was

physically possible. He was

exhausted from everything

Jackson had made them do

before.

“Hit dirt and give me two

hundred, then,” Jackson

challenged.

Dio was furious but began

pounding out the push-ups

before Jackson added more.

He kept Dio at it: sit-ups,

squats, anything he could

think of until every vein in

Dio’s neck was strained.

“You keep talking about

this girl you want to see,”

Jackson said, pacing back and

forth as Dio kept going. “You

think she wants some street

bum that can’t get a job, in

and out of jail, some quitter?”

“Sir, no sir,” he answered,

barely able to catch his breath.

“Give me a hundred more

push-ups.”

“Sir, I … sir, Trainee

Rodríguez can’t, sir. I’m sorry

but it’s impossible.”

“Impossible? Can’t? Them

words ain’t words in my

camp, only assiduity. What’s

assiduity, Trainee?”

“Sir … Trainee Rodríguez

doesn’t know, sir,” he

answered. His arms were

shaking and his body aching,

and he certainly wasn’t in the

mood for vocabulary lessons.

“Look it up sometime.

You’re going to need it.”

Then Jackson snorted. “Fine.

Go and quit. See if your girl

wants some quitter. Yeah,

that’s going to happen.”

He shook his head and

walked away.

He watched him go and

something struck inside.

Another person giving up on

him, another person not

believing in him. That man

didn’t know half of what he

was capable of, Dio thought.

He was going to show him.

Nobody called him a

quitter.

Dio got down on the

ground and cranked out those

push-ups.

Jackson raised an eyebrow

as Dio hopped up and stood

at attention, catching his

breath. “Sir, Trainee

Rodríguez is finished, sir.”

Jackson could hardly hide

his smile.

“All right. You get on

inside. And you better wash

up before you eat. Nothing’s

worse than smelling sweaty

nasty funk.”

After that, Jackson was so

proud, though he’d never

admit it, that he even

arranged for Dio to get an

extra Spam burger.

Chapter 13

Dio’s bunk had never felt

so good as that night. He was

so tired, he couldn’t even

think.

But a warm smile spread

over his face as he realized

what he had done. He’d

actually succeeded at

something.

He knew Jennifer would

have been proud. She always

said he had so much

potential. Somehow, in his

own weird way, he felt he was

one step closer to becoming

somebody. He didn’t know

who or what yet, but

someone better, someone

stronger.

From that point on, every

night before he said his

prayers and went to bed, he

read the dictionary, learning

new words so he could keep

up with Jackson.

“Rise and shine, Radigez!”

Jackson yelled in Dio’s face

the next morning. His body

felt like an old truck that

needed to be warmed up. But

he managed to get up, a new

fire pushing through him.

He wasn’t a quitter anymore.

Chapter 14

Dio had been so busy at

camp, trying to improve, that

he was surprised when

Jennifer’s letter came two

weeks later. Before he could

even open it, Simon was at his

side.

Dio tried to hide his smile.

“Just hold up, ​

ése.​



He tore the letter open,

crossed himself and said a

little prayer. Then he began

reading aloud to Simon.

Dear Dio,

The picture you drew of

me was really sweet. You’re

so talented. Sorry I didn’t

make it to your visitor’s

day. I had to go back into

the hospital for internal

bleeding. It’s ​

a trip​

funny,

this whole thing has

brought mi familia together

again. They want me to

come home, Dio. Can you

believe it?​



I almost cried

when my mom said that.

You know your padres

care, sabes? But sometimes

you just need to hear it

from them.

“I know how that goes,”

Simon added.

Dio blinked and then

noticed everyone in the squad

was perched at the edge of

their seats, listening. He felt

completely exposed but kept

reading anyway.

I’m kind of worried because

I don’t want no problems

like we had before. I don’t

want all the gritos. Maybe

things will change. I hope

so cause I don’t ​

want to run

away again​

have no other

place to go. I told you my

big dreams, Dio. I believe

in them still, I do. It’s just I

get tired of depending on

other people. I want to go

to school again. I want to

be somebody. I never told

my mom what I did out

there to survive when I ran

away. It’d break their heart.

“What’d she do?” Simon

asked.

Dio’s heart jumped to his

throat.

“Yeah,” Grossaint said,

winking at Dio, “what ​

did​

she

do?”

Everybody busted out

laughing. Dio was about to

pound Grossaint when

Jackson entered.

Dio didn’t want to think

about what Jennifer told him

she’d had to do to survive. He

never judged her and she

never judged him and he

guessed that was why they

could tell each other

everything. Nobody else

seemed to understand what it

was like, going through the

things they did. That was

why it felt so good to have

someone like her in his life

that knew the whole story.

“Everyone, let’s go!” Jackson

said.

Now where are we going?

he wondered as Jackson led

them to a big, wooden,

trailer-like building, a hooch.

Was it another surprise

exercise routine? Were they in

trouble? Had Grossaint

finally told on him about the

whole birthday surprise he’d

left in his shoes a while back?

It was pitch-dark inside but

as Jackson flicked the light on,

Dio could see it was

jam-packed with bunks. A

smile spread across Dio’s face

as he realized what was

happening.

They had just moved up to

the next level in the squad. As

they opened the boxes with

their striped clothes, the

squad could hardly contain

their excitement.

Dio was one step closer to

graduating, and one step

closer to Jennifer.

Chapter 15

“Of course, she wrote back.

I told you I knew what I was

talking about,” Louise said,

wiping her brow.

Dio was practically

hopping with excitement.

“I started writing her back.

Wanna hear it?”

“Go ahead. But hurry up.

You’ve got work to do,” she

said, smiling slightly as she

stirred the pot of soup.

“Yes, ma’am,” Dio said.

Then he cleared his throat.

Dear Jennifer,

Today I had to help the

squad out.

“Wait—Wait—Wait! Is

that how you’re going to start

out the letter?” Louise asked.

“Well, yeah. Why not?” he

said, raising his eyebrow

“Hmm,” she said, adding

more salt to her soup.

“What’s wrong with it?”

She put the wooden spoon

down, “Well, you’re talking

about ​

yourself​

, Dio. What

about how she’s feeling? A

woman wants to know you

care, that you’re making her

feel number one. You wanna

win this girl back for good,

you gotta put her first and

that starts with that letter.”

Dio thought for a while.

She was right. He guessed

sometimes he came across

kind of selfish. So, after a few

minutes of thinking, he read

Louise what he’d written.

Hey Baby,

Thanks for the

compliments. Glad you’re

feeling better. Hope things

get much better with your

parents. Wish I could say

the same for my moms.

She’s a b-​

You’re lucky. I

believe in your dreams too,

mija. I know it. You’re

going to be big and I’m

gonna buy all your rolas.

You and me gonna be

together again real soon.

First thing I get out I’ma

get us a place together. I got

it all planned out. They say

I’ll be able to get my GED

by the time I graduate boot

camp. Been studying day

and night, even reading the

dictionary like nobody’s

business. ​

It’s boring but

Can you believe it? Ain’t

that a trip? And to think

the teachers in school used

to say I’d never graduate.

Anyway, miss you mucho.

Te amo.

Playboy

Louise nodded, but her

mind was elsewhere. “What

do you mean the teachers

used to say you’d never

graduate? They told you you

were stupid or something?”

“Pretty much,” Dio

answered, scrunching his

mouth.

“What did your mom say?”

she said, putting her hands on

her hips.

His mind flashed back to all

the drunken abuse from his

mother and he just shrugged.

She’d called him much more

than “stupid.”

“Jennifer was the only one

back then that would say

anything good,” he replied. “I

was thirteen and I was going

to commit suicide. For real.”

“At thirteen?”

He looked away from her,

biting his lips. Truth was, he

wasn’t joking. It really had

been that bad. If it hadn’t

been for Jennifer and the fact

that Daniel needed him, he

didn’t know where he’d be.

“Let’s talk about something

else. ‘Kay?” he said.

“Can I just ask you one

thing about that, Dio?

Where’s your mom now?”

“Who cares? Probably

rehab again.”

“Drugs?”

“Booze. Just hope ​

mi

hermanito’s​

okay. I don’t

want him getting in no foster

care like I had to.”

Louise shook her head.

“Yep,” Dio smiled. “Me and

my brother’s all tight. One

day, me and Jennifer gonna

get enough money together

to take care of him and her

little sister, too.”

“Sounds like a great girl,

Jennifer. Dio, do me a favor;

you get her back, hold on to

her and never let her go. You

hear?” She put her hand on

his shoulder, looking right

into his eyes.

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied,

biting the inside of his cheek.

Chapter 16

“Get a move on!” Jackson

roared as the squad ran in the

scorching desert sun.

Dio had never run faster in

his life. He was dripping with

sweat and the desert sucked

his throat dry, but it felt

good.

He and Grossaint were

head-to-head at the last wall

in the obstacle course, then

up the thick rope, one hand

over the other, until Dio

touched the top and slid

down just as Grossaint was

halfway up.

Dio even gave him a wink

on the way down and raced to

the finish line. Jackson clicked

his stopwatch. “9:03.”

The squad cheered Dio.

Jackson cleared his throat.

“All right. Don’t get too

excited. Not bad, Radigez.

Not bad.”

Grossaint raced up to

Jackson.

“9:47,” he called, checking

his stopwatch.

“Sir, Trainee Grossaint

requests permission to speak,

sir,” he asked Jackson.

“Go ahead,” Jackson

grunted.

“Sir, Trainee Radigez didn’t

touch the top of the rope all

the way. He’s supposed to—”

“Trainee, what’s the ninth

general rule?”

“Um … Sir, trainees m

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