Is honesty always the best policy?
@ReneCC
Is it really? This may sound clichéd but I personally believe that honesty is the preferred way to reveal the truth. And the greatest truths are always simple – which logically should mean that being honest is the simplest way to live.
After all, we don’t need to have a good memory if we tell the truth – and we sure don’t have to remember what we told or to whom. Whatever will come out eventually will come out.
Am I honest? As much as I possible, although I admit at times I don’t tell the truth – especially when dealing with those I don’t trust. I won’t lie to them, but if I don’t want to answer something, I just tell them that I’m not going to tell them the answer.
Many times, if they haven’t asked the right question, I just don’t volunteer the answer that I know so well they are looking for. In conclusion, truth works out to be the best policy, and best of all is that we feel good about it.
Oh, before I get carried away, there are a couple of disclaimers you need to be aware of before blaming me the next time you decide to be brutally honest. One, even though the dinner in your in laws’ house was bad, please refrain from telling them so. Second, never tell the truth about what you really think about a woman’s hair, shape and fashion choices. Instead, just state: Hey, your [hair/figure/fashion item] is great. Perfectly suited for you. All izz well!
@zoyaamirin
I believe honesty is the best policy. So am I always honest? No. I have had my moments of not telling the truth: major lies and fibs, white lies and those that are black or gray. Whatever the color, lies are lies.
I learned my biggest lesson in my 39 years young by not telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth – every itty-bitty detail about myself, including mistakes – to my lover. Honestly, I hate being vulnerable to anyone, especially someone that I love and care so much about, and the fear they can use my past against my present and my future.
I eventually broke down after trying too hard to prove I am more honest than he thought I am. I kept prodding him to focus on the complete woman I am, instead of being defined according to a dishonest mistake.
Yes, dishonesty cost me my relationship. The biggest lessons I learned from my mistake are:
Trust vs Love: You must earn trust after you break it, but never try to earn love. Because love is given freely #MyLesson. I felt strongly I could not trust him with my past mistakes but he asked me to prove I loved him by revealing all (he ended up blabbering to others a couple of times, and twisted the facts on social media every time he was upset with me). –> Instead of telling lies, I should have broken up with him.
While your gut tells you love will leave you vulnerable, being in love means feeling secure with your love one –> Listen, Zoya, hello! The gut message was loud and clear; I did not feel safe and secure with my (now ex) insecure lover! Leave him. Enuf said
Do –> Earn Trust: Prove you are a trustworthy person and do your best to be honest. Most people can handle the truth more than you think they can. If something inside you tries to rationalize you being dishonest, ask yourself who are you really trying to protect, you or them?
Don’t–> Earn Love : If someone asks you to prove to them that you love them or asks you to make them love you back, whoever they are they are not worth it, dear friend. Love is given freely as the most awesome energy in the world.
Do –> Be Assertive: Stand up for your rights without hurting others.
Don’t –> Be brutally honest. My other terms for brutal honesty are being inconsiderate, unethical, showing poor etiquette, crass or just plain stupid.
In sum, I agree with Rene. Instead of lying, just say you are not ready to talk or are unsure about your feelings. But, Rene, you have to let people know if their dress is unfashionable, right?
I assure you that, psychologically, your life will not be easier in being an honest person, but I also can guarantee you it will make you proud of yourself. Trust me, my friend, if you honestly have no hidden agenda, and consider others’ interests in finding a win-win solution for all, you will be blessed as the happiest person on Earth.
@mrshananto
Honesty is important for me. In my line of work we are required to explain everything to our clients, whatever the premise.
But I am not going to discuss here my work as a financial planner. I am going to talk about my other work as a mom of three growing children, and how I try to feed them, honestly.
I have a 12-year-old son in junior high, a 9-year-old girl in 5th grade and a toddler who thinks she is a lion. Roaaar! I cook their lunch for them every morning at 5 a.m. It’s a full course meal, usually consisting of rice or pasta, chicken or fish, fruit or cake.
I know full well that the youngest one will happily come home from school and report that, being a lion, she devoured all her lunch. Well, she also likes to share with the other lions at school. Good job, cub … I mean, girl!
My middle child will complain about which part of her meal she did not like. But she is touched by me taking the time to cook for her so she eats it all the same. She will then post something lovely on her Instagram account and declare to all her friends how proud she is that her Mamah cooks for her.
My son eats everything except for the fruit and veggies. So should I be honest with him that I include banana puree in his favorite choco-chip brownies? Or should I tell him that the chicken teriyaki has carrot puree in its sauce? He is also blissfully unaware that the yummy macaroni and cheese has cauliflower puree. I also have not told him about all the other fruit and veggie purees I slip into his meals.
Now, should I tell him the truth, or wait until he agrees to finish all his vegetables? In this case, this is not a democracy. Under my roof, and in my kitchen, I rule with my #homemadeMamah recipes! 
I think this is the only occasion I allow myself to not be honest *giggles*
@iwetramadhan
Honesty is very easy to say but hard to do. It’s something we agree upon,
we know very well, but somehow something that we rarely find in our daily lives.
Have you said something honest today? See, it’s not easy. Sometimes people cannot take an honest answer or forthright opinion. And society sometimes pushes us to avoid telling the truth. As Rene said, he often prefers to not answer something that would require him to lie. I sometimes do that, too. When I don’t want to lie, I prefer to smile, or if the person continues to push me to answer, I will try to find something positive to say.
But I’m only human. I have my weaknesses. I can create an answer that I think will not ruffle any feathers, but people always say that I am very expressive. That means that sometimes my face cannot lie and reveals my true feelings.
Whether it’s flight or fight, you choose.