Valentines Day is just a few weeks away and for some spouses it’s a holiday highly anticipated. This is the one day of the year when the main emphasis is celebrating the love. There will be flowers and teddy bears and chocolates galore. Romantic dinners and getaways will be plentiful with babysitters in high demand.
Unfortunately Valentines Day is not a time for celebration for many couples. If you are struggling in your relationship you know what I mean. Your heart is not racing with anticipation and your expectations for this day are very low. In fact, you might even be a little sad on February 14th as millions of happy couples cherish the day. Perhaps for you hanging out on social networks will be your valentine this year.
I feel for you if your relationship has reached the point where it’s maxed out. Although marriage should bring joy to your life, you feel a sense of sadness and frustration. Maybe you find a little solace in connecting with friends via Facebook or Twitter.
There is nothing wrong with networking with best friends or old friends unless the time you spend online would be better used fixing your relationship. I would suggest you take some time and figure out if being online is helpful to your relationship at this time.
I believe with the pressures of life today everyone needs a way to escape. You can get a sense of joy celebrating the good news you find out about other folks lives on the social networks. But I must ask, “Shouldn’t you be experiencing joy in your marriage”?
If you are not experiencing joy in your marriage, are you spending too much time online instead of trying to improve your marriage? What signals are you sending to your spouse if more of your time is spent online than tending to your spouse’s needs?
There are a few things that you can do to ensure that your spouse is your true valentine.
Tell your spouse how much you love and appreciate him or her.
Show in tangible ways that you care.
Treat your spouse as though he or she were the most important person in your life.
Coordinate a low key, low budget Valentines Day. Use your imagination and creativity to make the day special. It’s not important how much you spend but rather how much you have thought about it.
Don’t set unrealistic expectations for the day. If your spouse is not romantic or creative, don’t be disappointed. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t loved. It might just mean that your spouse doesn’t appreciate the same things that make you happy.
Do not under any circumstances compare your relationship or Valentines Day to other couples. You will find fault with your spouse and your relationship.
Be devoted and not detached.
Celebrate the good in your relationship and learn to tolerate the bad until it gets fixed.
This Valentines Day doesn’t have to be disappointing and sad for you. Each and every day you have a new opportunity to get your relationship going in the right direction. Don’t wait for February 14th to get started on restoring your marriage. Start today!
I hope you are determined to make your marriage special again. You have invested so much time and energy in your marriage. Plan to move forward in love and in peace and you will find success.