Lets face it, we’ve all indulged in a little hyperbole and untruth when it comes to tackling interview questions. From downplaying weaknesses to overselling our strengths, nothing is sacred in the quest to fill that vacancy. Let me tear down the veil of half-truths and reveal what interviewees would really say if they were being totally honest.
1.
Q: So, tell me about yourself.
A: *Insert vague description of professional background and description of yourself*
Honest Answer: I am going to be unemployed soon because of reasons that either reflect badly on myself or my boss and also, I got expenses to pay for, actually.
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2.
Q: Why did you choose our company?
A: Oh because I have seen the company’s portfolio of work which is very impressive and I believe I’ll fit in just fine with the company’s vision!
Honest Answer: Oh because you guys are the only one that got back to me, loh.
3.
Q: Tell me about what our company does?
A: *Spin a story about the company’s trade while emphasizing on their notable achievements*
Honest Answer: You guys are a company that is hiring, which means you guys are a source of income for desperate people like me.
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4.
Q: How did you hear about this position?
A: This company is a household name in the industry and thus it’s the first website I went to for any job openings.
Honest Answer: Not really heard about, lah. More like stumbled upon while anyhow sending applications to every single job opening that I think I fit the bill, loh.
5.
Q: What would you say are your weakness?
A: Hmm this is a really tough one……
Honest Answer: You sure you want to know? Because if I tell you, I confirm will not get the job one.
6.
Q: What are you strengths?
A: *Insert A LOT of strengths*
Honest Answer: …………I’m still alive, that one is a strength too, right?
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7.
Q: What is your dream job?
A: A job that enables me to live out my passion and also offers a chance for me to develop constantly.
Honest Answer: A job that pays a lot for the least amount of work done. Like do you even have to ask?
8.
Q: How good are you in a Team environment?
A: I believe I will thrive in a team environment as I possess quite the affable personality and it will only mean I get to build on the strengths of others.
Honest Answer: I like it a lot, less work for me.
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9.
Q: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
A: My five year plan is, *insert ambitious and unachievable 5 year plan*
Honest Answer: Most probably in another company doing the same thing but with better pay loh.
10.
Q: Why do you want to leave your current company?
A: I am on the lookout to pursue my interest and for self-improvement.
Honest Answer: My boss is a jerk and he denied me a pay raise and my 13 month bonus.
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11.
Q: Why should we pick you?
A: I believe my strengths are what this company really needs to take it to the next level.
Honest Answer: If you guys pick me, please do let me know because I have no idea also.
12.
Q: Tell me about your proudest achievement.
A: *Talk about a big achievement that you probably only had a 20% involvement in*
Honest Answer: Well I stayed employed for like 2 years!
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13.
Q: Tell me about the time you were faced with a big challenge and how you overcome it.
A: *Talk about the challenge and how through tenacity, a level head under pressure and impressive organization skills you manage to overcome said challenge*
Honest Answer: Uh I got this massive scolding from my boss and he sort of just took over it after saying, “If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself”
14.
Q: What are your salary requirements?
A: As per stated in the application. I believe it is reflective of my experience and what I can offer to the company.
Honest Answer: Even if pay me lower than my expected salary, I will still join, lah. I’m just trying my luck. Please pay me more.
15.
Q: What are your hobbies?
A: I like reading books on my free time, also magazines so I can to keep up to date with the latest going-ons in this industry. I also find chess a very stimulating experience.
Honest Answer: I mostly just spend my money till I have none loh. That’s why I applied for a job.
giphy.com
16.
Q: Who are our competitors?
A: *List down names of competitors*
Honest Answer: Companies that I most probably am going to send in an application next if you don’t hire me!
17.
Q: What is your favorite work from us?
A: *Insert and explain favorite work*
Honest Answer: Well this one, mostly because it is the second one listed in the portfolio section of your website. If I choose the first one it would be too obvious, right?
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18.
Q: Have you gone for interviews with any other companies?
A: Yes I have gone for one other interview with another one in the pipeline.
Honest Answer: Not really, but I mean you know I’m going to lie about this right, so can use as leverage.
19.
Q: What’s your availability?
A: It is as per stated in my application which would be 1 month from now after I serve my notice.
Honest Answer: Well if can, I want to take a break as long as I like after serving my notice. At least until my money runs out. Can? Cannot? Then ask for what?
20.
Q: Do you have any other questions or comment?
A: What can you tell me about the company’s plan for growth?
Honest Answer: No question. Just hire me and I will do sh*t for you.
giphy.com
Well, on a more serious note. If you don’t feel like wanting to have to lie your way through a job interview, perhaps you can do some reading to best prepare yourself. Online sites like BetterWorldBooks provide the perfect platform for you to find a book that best suits your need such as 250 Job Interview Questions You’ll Most Likely Be Asked.
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