Resisting her brother’s best friend is futile…
Faith Fitzpatrick isn’t looking for a hero. Burned one too many times in the past, she’s now sworn them off completely. And when her brother’s best friend, Connor, convinces him to join the dangerous SWAT team, Faith has never been more anti-hero. What’s wrong with having a safe job? There’s nothing safe about Connor. Confident, sexy, and sporting a six-pack that should be illegal, he’s everything she doesn’t want.
When his best friend’s sister moves to town, local cop Connor Maguire knows he’s in trouble. Faith is feisty, funny, and talks trash like nobody’s business. She’s also his partner’s sister—and so totally off limits. Working on the Fall Festival together, they agree to a truce and become friends. But the more time Connor spends with Faith, the more he’s willing to risk the wrath of her brother. If he could only convince her to take a risk on him, too.
Information:
Title: Resisting the Hero (An Accidentally in Love novel)
Author: Cindi Madsen
Genre: Contemporary
Length: 197 pages
Release Date: January 2014
ISBN: 978-1-62266-286-9
Imprint: Bliss
Praise for Resisting the Hero:
“A strong and sassy heroine, smoking hot hero, and sizzling chemistry. This is a must-read romance.” – Michelle Major, author of Her Accidental Engagement
Excerpt from
Resisting the Hero
by Cindi Madsen
Copyright © 2013 by Cindi Madsen. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce, distribute, or transmit in any form or by any means. For information regarding subsidiary rights, please contact the Publisher.
Chapter One
The bar was bursting with guys tonight—seriously, it was like Muscles R Us up in here, all filled-out chests and bulging arms with biceps upon biceps. Under other circumstances, Faith might take a moment to enjoy the view. But right now, she was looking for one particular meathead, and she happened to be related to him. Anger had been building the entire four-hour drive from Atlanta, and now it pulsed through her like the loud music, wanting to be set free.
Of all the stupidest, craziest, good-way-to-get-himself-killed moves. It was no wonder her brother hadn’t told her what he was up to until she was on her way back to North Carolina, hours away from moving in with him and his family. Then Kaleb had thrown it out, all his words strung together. “By the way, I completed the SWAT program today and am a certified operator now. There’s a party at the Rusty Anchor to celebrate, so you should swing by if you get into town in time.”
And when Faith had opened her mouth to ask if he were serious, he’d said he had to go and hung up. But he’d later texted a picture of himself holding a certificate, his wife and daughter by his side, and told her the party was at seven. Like she’d actually want to celebrate something that would put him in even more danger than his current police job.
How can he do this to his family? His pregnant wife? His little girl? After all, Kaleb had seen firsthand what could happen in this line of work. He’d promised that he’d choose the safer path in his career. Faith hadn’t wanted him to go into law enforcement in the first place, but no, he had to go and try to be a hero anyway. And now he was taking it to another level by joining a SWAT team? Why couldn’t he let someone else’s brother be a hero? Her family had given enough.
Faith scanned the room as she moved farther into it, taking a second to look from face to face. Finding her brother in a place she used to frequent ought to be easy, but the lights were dimmed, and there were so many guys, all dressed similarly in black T-shirts. Several had swat emblazoned on their chests in white, and others bore cornelius sheriff’s department in smaller letters over their shirt pocket.
Faith tipped onto her toes—this would be a lot easier if everyone here wasn’t at least a foot taller than she was.
A guy approached her, beer bottle in one hand, smiling at her in that way guys do when they think they’re good-looking enough to smile and get anything they want. “My friend and I were just talking about what a sausage fest this was, and then you came in.” He ran his appraising gaze down her body, lingering on the V of her neckline.
Faith crossed her arms. “That works out, because I’m here for a weenie roast.”
He put a protective hand over his package—probably without realizing he was doing it—but his smile widened. “Oh yeah. You’re definitely coming to get a drink with me.” He reached for her hand, but she jerked it away.
“I’m actually looking for Kaleb Fitzpatrick,” she said as cheers erupted over in the bar area, swallowing up her words.
Big and Beefy glanced toward the noise and then returned his attention to her and leaned down. “Fitzpatrick, you say?” This close, it was impossible not to notice just how good-looking he was. His almost black hair was disheveled in a careless way, he had thick, dark eyebrows, and his eyes were a strange shade of gray that had to be a trick of the light. One corner of his mouth turned up, as if he knew she liked what she saw. So maybe she did, but it wasn’t like she’d go for a guy like him. The only thing worse than a guy with a hero complex was one who also had a huge ego.
“Do you know where he is or not?” she asked.
Despite the impatience she’d purposely put into her voice, the amusement in his features only grew. “Trust me, I’m more fun,” he said, taking cocky to the next level with a simple eyebrow raise.
She blew out a breath. “Obviously you think pretty highly of yourself, but trust me, you don’t wanna mess with me tonight.”
He reached out and flicked the ends of her hair. “Actually, the very reason I came over here was to mess with you.”
Faith made an extra-large eye roll. “Seriously, you’re gonna have to do better than that.”
Someone bumped into her from behind, causing her to stumble into the guy she’d been trying to break free from. He gripped her upper arms, his cold beer bottle pressing against her skin on one side as her hands braced against his chest, which she couldn’t help but notice was rock solid.
The guy smelled like beer and broken promises, and still her heart fluttered the tiniest bit, the traitorous stirrings of attraction going through her gut. Breath caught in her throat, she froze in place instead of pushing away like she should.
Then she spotted her brother and her momentarily missing common sense started working again. She pulled back from Big and Beefy as Kaleb approached.
“Hey,” Kaleb said, raising his voice over the din of multiple conversations and music. “Glad you could make it.”
Faith clenched her fists, her earlier anger rising up again now that her brother was in front of her. “Well, you’ll change your mind about that in about a second, because I came here to talk some sense into you, not congratulate you on being a well-trained idiot.”
“Jeez, back down, girl,” Big and Beefy said.
“Stay out of it,” she shot back at him, then returned her gaze to Kaleb. “Why wasn’t it enough to just be a cop? I don’t understand why you’d need to go and join a SWAT team on top of it.”
“Actually,” Big and Beefy said, taking a sip from his beer, “that was my idea. Thought we could use more of an adventure.”
She narrowed her eyes on him.
“Faith,” Kaleb said, “Connor didn’t mean—”
“You’re the one who talked him into this?” She jabbed his chest with a finger. “Maybe you want to go throwing yourself in danger at every turn, but my brother has a little girl and a baby on the way. He has a wife to take care of. I know your type; you don’t think of anyone else but yourself. And you”—she spun back to Kaleb—“you know the risks. How can you be such an idiot?” She hated the tears stinging her eyes. She blinked them back, refusing to lose it in the middle of the Rusty Anchor.
Big and Beefy—Connor, apparently—put his hand on her shoulder. “You need to relax. He’s a hero.”
“I wish he was a coward,” she spat. All the heat seeped out of her, followed immediately by an overwhelming sense of failure. She wasn’t sure what she thought would happen. Maybe that she’d yell and Kaleb would say he wasn’t actually going to go through with it. Or that he’d at least acknowledge he was breaking promises. “Fine. Go celebrate. Just don’t expect me to congratulate you.” The hours in the car caught up to her all at once. Her eyes burned, her muscles were tight, and she needed something to eat, preferably with someone she didn’t want to punch in the face. “I’m guessing Anna’s around here somewhere.”
Kaleb pointed over his shoulder. “Back corner in a booth.” As Faith started away, he reached out and gave her arm a gentle squeeze. “It’s going to be okay, Faithie. Going through the program means I’m better trained, and it’s not like there’s a lot of crime here. I just want to be prepared if there is. And the pay is better. I’ve got to think about that now that I’m going to have two kids to take care of.”
A tight band formed around Faith’s chest. “None of that will matter if you die before you get to see them grow up.” She walked past him, trying to shove back her emotions so she could go find her pregnant sister-in-law and try to be strong for her. This was one of the reasons Faith had chosen to go to college a couple states over. She knew she was a bit irrational about her brother’s career choice, but she couldn’t help it.
And coming back had just brought up all the memories she wasn’t ready to face.
…
Connor watched the short, curvy blonde walk away from him and Kaleb. “That’s your sister? She’s dramatic. And kind of a—”
“Don’t finish that.” Kaleb smacked the back of Connor’s head. “And stop checking out her ass.”
Connor took one last glance. When he’d seen Faith walk into the bar, he couldn’t look away. A moment before, he and Sullivan had been in a friendly argument over the tall brunette across the bar—Sullivan thought she was eyeing him, when she was clearly flirting with Connor—but then Faith had come in, and he was out of his seat before any of the other guys could hit on her. He hadn’t expected her to be so damn prickly. As she’d been yelling, though, he’d had the strangest urge to kiss her so she’d shut up. Well, and so he could kiss her. But there were plenty of other girls out there—no way he’d want to deal with that emotional hurricane.
Although, it was kind of fun getting a rise out of her. In fact, it was the least bored he’d been with a woman in a while, which was sad but true. And for all her talk, she was about to be putty in his hands before her brother showed up.
Kaleb cleared his throat.
Connor slowly pulled his gaze off Faith and shook his fuzzy head. “Give me a break—I’m drunk.”
“Just go point your wasted self at someone else. She’s already pissed off and going to be impossible to deal with. I don’t need you adding to the mess.”
Connor raised his hands, palms up. “I got it. Leave your sister alone. Now, let’s go get another drink.” Whether Faith liked it or not, they were celebrating. And they were heroes. The training had been killer—obstacle courses, shooting drills, sleep deprivation—and they’d survived. Together. Kaleb was one of his best friends, and his wife, Anna, was cool, too, which was why he liked hanging at their place so much—their house felt like his second home. As chill as Anna usually was, though, Connor could tell she hadn’t been thrilled about the SWAT thing, either.
Just another reason why he was in no hurry to settle down.
…
Faith slid into the back booth where Anna was seated. The table hid the bottom half of her belly, but the top was clearly rounded, and her sister-in-law had that pregnant-lady glow people talked about.
Faith glanced out at the rowdy sea of guys filling the bar and then back at Anna. “I don’t want to stress you out, but how are you not freaking out about Kaleb doing this?”
Anna shrugged. “I wasn’t exactly happy about it at first, but we discussed all the pros and cons and why he wanted to do it. Plus, I’ve had longer than a day to process it. I told him to tell you earlier, and even thought about doing so myself, but I didn’t want to get in the middle of it.”
Faith gritted her teeth. Of course Kaleb had waited to tell her, because he’d known how upset she’d be. She and Kaleb were both stubborn, and they’d fought plenty growing up. But they were also close, and if anyone messed with her, he made sure it never happened again. He’d always taken care of her and even let her boss him around a bit. Too bad he’d grown out of that, because she’d really like to force him to change careers.
Faith picked up the flip chart on the table with all the drinks and started turning the pages without really looking at the brews it bragged about. “If anything bad goes down, he’s now the first line of defense. That’s got to worry you at least a little.”
“Of course it does. But I’ve never seen him so happy. He’s proud that he made it through. I’m proud of him, too.”
Faith reached the end of the drink menu and then shoved it aside. “If it were the guy I loved…I couldn’t do it.”
“Oh, never say never,” Anna said.
“I’m saying it. Never. I’m going to find a nice nerdy guy to settle down with. Whether it’s math or science or just an obsessive amount of Star Wars gear and love for role-playing games, I don’t care. I’m not even giving a second glance at law enforcement or military guys.”
Anna cracked a smile. “Then you better not look around. Being surrounded by all these ripped guys only makes me feel even more whalelike.” She put a hand on the top of her belly.
“You look great, and I can’t wait to meet the little guy.” Faith scooted forward and put her hand on her sister-in-law’s tummy, hoping to feel her nephew moving around. “I am happy about that part of living closer. And I can’t wait to see Ella.”
“She’s been talking for weeks about you coming to live with us.”
Faith pictured her little niece—chubby cheeks, strawberry-blond curls, and the same green eyes Faith and Kaleb had gotten from their dad. She’d wrapped Faith around her finger from day one.
“And how are you doing with…everything?” Anna asked.
Everything. AKA, the fact that she’d dumped her savings into a down payment on a condo so she and Jeff could move in together, only to discover him cheating on her in their brand-new bed, forcing her to rearrange all of her plans. “I’m just glad everything’s finally taken care of. The title’s signed over, and after the attorney fees, I should slowly get my money back, one payment from the jackass at a time.” Faith folded her arms on the table. “I appreciate you letting me stay with you while I look for a new place. It should be two months, three tops.”
“You’re welcome to stay as long as you need. It’ll be nice to have someone around to talk to. Kaleb’s gone a lot, and as much as I love Ella, she’s not the best conversationalist. Unless you want to discuss princesses or cartoons.” Anna shook her head. “I don’t know how she got to be so girlie.”
Anna was a T-shirt-and-jeans type girl. Somehow Ella came out with a love for all things frilly and pink. A waitress came by and Faith ordered a burger and fries, the same thing she’d always ordered here. The same thing Dad had always ordered here. It was too packed to get a good look around, but she saw enough to know that the place was still the same. They probably even had Dad’s picture and the framed article about him hanging on the wall behind the bar. It’d hurt Faith to see it, but it’d hurt even more if it weren’t there.
She’d be tempted to go check it out, but Kaleb and that Connor guy were at the bar, and she wasn’t sure she was ready to dive into the past anyway. So she talked to Anna while she waited for her food and all through her meal. She could almost block out the reason she was in the Rusty Anchor and just focus on how nice it was to be back in Cornelius. But of course then she’d see a guy with a stupid SWAT shirt and get mad and scared all over again.
Maybe coming back was a mistake. But after everything had fallen apart in Atlanta—leaving her feeling like a crushed fool, as well as low on funds—she’d needed an escape. Dr. Schaeffer’s call asking if she wanted a spot in the predoctoral clinical psychology internship he was heading up was too good an offer to refuse.
After the waitress took away her empty plate, Kaleb showed up. He scooted into the booth next to his wife and leaned back, his eyes on Faith. “You still pissed?”
Faith sighed. “Not pissed so much anymore. Just…I don’t like it. I’m never going to be happy about you being a cop, and this is a whole new level of scary for me.”
“I understand, I do. When Dad died…” Kaleb glanced at the bar area and she could see the way his throat was working. It made a lump rise in her own. “I want him to be proud of me. And I want to keep people safe. My wife…” He put his hand on Anna’s stomach. “My kids. You.” He exhaled. “Just try to understand.”
The big, puppy-dog eyes he flashed at her made it impossible to stay mad. At him, anyway. She caught sight of Connor seated at the bar and decided to aim all her anger his way. At least then she’d have someone to blame.
“I’ll try. That’s the best I can do right now.” Faith rolled her neck from side to side, still stiff and tired from her day. “How long do we have to stay and watch all the cavemen congratulate themselves?”
Kaleb laughed. “We can go home right now.” He looked at Anna, who nodded, and then they got up and started out of the bar.
Faith swore she could feel someone looking at her, so she glanced over her shoulder.
Connor was staring right at her. He raised his beer and winked.
What a conceited—
Faith ran right into the open door.
It was the kind of move that’s impossible to hide, where you grasp for something to keep you up and only get air. She finally got control of her body and focused on stepping around the door this time. Right before it closed, she caught sight of Connor, still staring.
And judging from the smug grin on his face, he’d definitely enjoyed the show.
…
Connor smiled into his beer. That girl put on a good act, but she was attracted to him—so much so, she ran right into the door. A quick swirl of his bottle and then he tipped it up and downed the rest of its contents. Sure, he’d originally thought he should avoid her, but her fiery personality had him wanting another chance to mess with her. Faith was a challenge wrapped in a hot body, and that happened to be his favorite type of challenge.
“Hey.” It was the twiggy brunette he’d been arguing over with Sullivan earlier. She breathed more than said the word as she settled onto the stool next to him.
Connor flashed his signature make-the-ladies-crazy half smile. “Hey.”
She giggled. Then stared at him, blinking her brown, bloodshot eyes. Apparently he was supposed to come up with the conversation. He glanced toward the door, which was stupid, because Kaleb’s little sister had left.
Ugh. She was his best friend’s sister. Probably a bad idea—no, definitely a bad idea.
Of course, he specialized in bad ideas. He thought about when she’d stumbled into him and the little gasp noise she’d made. How her curves felt against his body, and the heat that had wound through his veins and was rising up again at the memory.
“…Sarah. And you are?” The brunette was leaning close. Her hand was on his knee. Did she say her name was Sarah? She was pretty. Maybe a little boring, which hadn’t ever concerned him all that much before, but lately, didn’t even seem worth the minimal effort. It’d been a while, though. Long by his usual standards.
“Connor,” he said when he realized she was still waiting for his name. More giggling. Her hand slid a little higher.
Time to make a decision. Which bad idea was he going to go for tonight?
Chapter Two
Connor felt the bed shift. He could feel the steady stare, but he didn’t open his eyes—he barely breathed, not wanting to give away the fact that he was awake. He wondered how long it’d take until she gave up on him and left the bed. He was too hungover to deal with it.
A wet tongue dragged across his face.
The bark that followed was so loud it made his ears ring. Then came more licking.
He shoved his dog’s face away, groaning as the bright light pierced his eyeballs. “Fine, I’m up. I’m up.”
Connor’s two-year-old German shepherd sat there breathing on him, because she’d figured out if she took off too soon he’d just go back to sleep and she’d have to wake him up all over again. This was one of the reasons he’d turned down the offer from the brunette girl at the bar last night. He already had a needy girl at home.
Okay, that wasn’t the only reason. He’d thought that after going through training, after accomplishing another step in his desired career path, he’d get back to feeling like himself. But he still felt like something deeper was missing from his life. Hell, he’d even considered letting his friends Wes and Dani set him up a few months back, to see if he could try a serious relationship. But that’d fallen through, and he’d told himself he was relieved.
Penny barked again—so damn loud—and nudged him with her wet nose.
“I drank too much last night, Pen. Does that mean nothing to you?”
Penny whimpered and he swore she looked at the clock, as if to say, Can’t you see we’re already thirty minutes behind schedule? Get your lazy ass out of bed and take me running already.
Connor slowly sat up, promised himself he’d never drink that much again, and pulled on warm-ups, a T-shirt, and his sneakers.
The cool morning air helped wake him up the rest of the way, though he was still foggier than usual. Penny didn’t take it easy on him, tugging him hard toward Lake Norman. Running was a release, a way to get everything off his mind and start the day fresh. But today it just wasn’t doing it for him. When he tried to turn around a mile shorter than usual—today was more of a three- than a five-mile day—Penny didn’t budge, pulling against her leash and whimpering. Finally, with the promise of an extra doggy treat when they got home, he convinced her to turn around. He had about a mile to go when he caught sight of the blonde jogging ahead of him.
He swore he’d stared at that same ass at the Rusty Anchor. Despite the fogginess, that was one thing he distinctly remembered from last night. He took a couple long strides to close the distance and get a closer look. Yep, it was definitely Kaleb’s little sister. Hair pulled up in a messy bun, cheeks flushed, black yoga pants showing off her shapely butt. Man, he loved yoga pants. He quickened his pace to catch up with her.
Faith glanced at Penny as she started to pass her up.
“Nice morning for a jog, isn’t it?” Connor asked, forcing as much cheeriness into his voice as he could manage.
“Yeah, it i—” Faith nearly tripped over her feet when her gaze landed on him.
He grabbed her arm to help steady her. “Careful, or you’ll have skinned knees to go with that mark on your face. You know, from where you ran into the door last night while checking me out.”
She jerked her arm away from him. “I was not… It was dark and… You’re so cocky, you know that?”
“It’s part of my charm.”
“You don’t have any charm.” Faith crouched down to pet Penny as she glared at him, and his dog snuggled right up to her. “A cop with a German shepherd. How cliché of you.” The verbal jab was canceled out by the adoration in her voice. More for the dog than him, probably, but he liked to think it was a little him, too.
Faith scratched behind Penny’s ears. “Poor doggy. I bet it’s hard living with an ego that big, isn’t it? You ever need a break, you come find me.”
“You’re staying with Kaleb and Anna, right?” Connor asked.
Faith glanced up, one of her eyebrows quirking higher than the other.
“If Penny needs a place to escape, she needs to know where you’ll be.” He reached down and patted his dog, and her dark eyes and muzzle moved back and forth between him and Faith.
The breeze caught hold of the pale strands coming loose from Faith’s bun. One of the strands stuck to her lip and she quickly swiped it away. But now he was looking at her full bottom lip and how it had a slight indentation in the middle. And since he was crouched down petting Penny, he was close enough to really take in Faith’s features, things he hadn’t noticed in the dim bar last night. She had high cheekbones, startling green eyes, and a cute little beauty mark above one eyebrow.
He thought about how bored he’d been with women lately. He had a feeling he’d be anything but with this girl. She was feisty, and by all appearances, couldn’t stand him. He wasn’t sure what it said that he found himself intrigued by that, but he was.
“I’d better get on with my jog,” Faith suddenly said, straightening. And then she was off and running. He wanted to catch up and tease her a little more. See if her cheeks flushed the way he vaguely recalled them doing last night. But then again, the view was nice from back here, and he knew something she probably didn’t…
He was going over to Kaleb’s later today. And there, it wouldn’t be so easy for her to run away from him.
…
Faith wandered the familiar streets of Cornelius, noting everything that had changed in the past six years. Most places were the same, with the exception of an upgrade here and there. Lake Norman glittered in the distance, coming into view between the buildings. She’d spent her childhood on that lake. Boating. Swimming. Fishing.
Flyers advertising the upcoming Fall Festival hung on the lampposts. They’d close off this section of town and set up booths in the middle of the street, leading all the way to Magnolia Park, where there’d be live music and contests. Faith had already signed up for the Fallen Officer 5K that’d take place early that morning. It was why she’d dragged herself out of bed and forced herself to go run—she wished she were in better shape, but she wanted to contribute however she could, so she’d walk the end of the race if she had to. Afterward, she’d go to the festival and fill up on delicious, artery-clogging food. Anna was going to set up a booth for the pottery she made, too. She’d been talking for months about how excited she was to have her vases, bowls, and plates on display for such a big event and how she hoped to make some extra money before the baby arrived.
Bigfish Bait and Tackle shop came into view, and Faith quickened her pace. The shop belonged to family friends, and while she was closer to Paul’s age, she and Brynn had suffered through fishing excursions together. The guys used to roll their eyes and complain about the smell when she and Brynn would sit on deck and paint their nails—the guys were covered in fish guts half the time, but apparently nail polish was too stinky to handle. They’d kept in touch through Facebook, but Faith hadn’t seen Paul or Brynn since she’d left six years ago.
I hope they’re in the shop today. If not, she’d ask Paul Senior how to find them. Her stay here would be much easier with familiar friends to hang out with. As she neared the shop, she spotted a girl with dark hair delivering a grape soda to a guy sitting at a table, laptop out in front of him.
Faith’s heart dropped. If someone had converted Bigfish into a trendy café, she might cry. Not that she was in a huge need of fishing supplies, but Dad used to love the place. He’d go in to “grab just one thing” and end up talking to Paul Senior for hours. Losing little places he loved felt like losing even more of him.
“Faith Fitzpatrick?” The girl straightened, and Faith realized it was Brynn. Her hair was dyed dark, but her features were still the same. Though the cut and color highlighted them and fit her more vintage style.
“I hardly recognized you,” Faith said, meeting Brynn halfway for a hug. “You look great.”
“Thanks. You, too.”
“For a second, I was afraid someone had turned Bigfish into a café.”
Brynn grinned at the guy seated at the table. “Someone thinks it’s a café that serves grape soda.” She bounced on the balls of her feet, joy clear on her features. “This is Sawyer. My boyfriend.”
“Weren’t you on the football team at Hough High?”
Sawyer pushed out from the green wrought iron table and stood, wrapping an arm around Brynn’s waist like it was second nature. “That was me. Back before I learned to appreciate the arts. And awesome girls who were passionate about them.”
Brynn’s grin widened, and he kissed her cheek.
Faith couldn’t help but stare for a moment. She could clearly see how in love Brynn and Sawyer were. That was what she wanted: a guy who was serious about settling down. A guy who wouldn’t look around at other girls and see what he was missing. She’d been so stupid in her relationship with Jeff, thinking she’d tamed a player. From now on, she was staying far, far away from those types.
“I’ll go get Paul,” Brynn said. “He’s engaged now, and I’m sure he’ll tell you all about his bride to be. If you need an out, just give me the signal.”
Faith laughed. “I forgot about the signal.” Back in the day, when her family used to hang out with the McAdamses, she, Brynn, and Paul would rub the side of their nose with one finger and then come up with a reason to escape. They’d sneak out to the lake or just relax in the backyard. The scent of charred meat would still be hanging in the air from Dad barbecuing and Mom’s laughter would occasionally ring out—she used to have the loudest laugh.
But those were the happy years. The before.
The lake water-scented air that’d smelled so fresh moments before turned sour. She’d thought the years away would’ve made everything easier—that she’d dealt with the past through college-level psychology classes and real-world experience. But it was different when the past was in every place she looked. It was why she’d run from here as soon as she’d gotten out of high school. When things went bad in Atlanta, she’d fled there, too. So much for facing things like a grown-up.
Paul McAdams stepped out of the store and grinned. His brown hair was shorter than he used to wear it in high school, and he’d filled out quite a bit. “Why, Shorty Fitzpatrick. Long time no see.”
He pulled Faith into a hug, and the anxiety that’d been working its way through her eased. Whenever she thought about home, she tended to focus on the bad memories and sorrow. She’d forgotten how friendly people were here. How nice it was to be around others who knew the real her. Everyone who’d known Daddy had come together to try to help her family. They’d done everything they could. Faith appreciated it, and she knew Mom had, too. But it hadn’t changed the fact that they were missing someone who should’ve been with them still.
“We’ve got to plan a fishing trip,” Paul said, and Faith returned to the present. She forced a smile and nodded. But she couldn’t stop thinking about how this sleepy, innocent-looking town had taken her dad.
And she couldn’t help thinking it might take Kaleb next.
…
Faith could hear deep voices in the living room, Kaleb’s and another. She couldn’t make out the words, but Anna was talking with them. Faith closed her laptop and set it on the nightstand. After several hours searching through pictures of apartments, her eyes burned and the spot between her shoulder blades ached.
She stepped over the boxes she wasn’t sure whether to put away or leave packed. Anna and Kaleb both said she could stay as long as she wanted, which was nice, but she wouldn’t feel like she was starting over until she had her own place. Preferably close to the UNC School of Medicine, where she’d be doing her internship. Maybe living in Charlotte would be enough to get away from all the memories but close enough to stay connected to her brother and his family.
Again she was glad Dr. Schaeffer had reached out to her. He was a long-time friend of the family; had set up her, Mom, and Kaleb with a nice counselor to help deal with Dad’s passing; and had advised her when she told him she was interested in becoming a counselor. Clinical spots were difficult to find, and she couldn’t wait to get started. Having a couple of months off had sounded nice at first, especially after six straight years of studying day and night. But with all the memories rising up, she might need a temporary job to keep herself busy.
Faith stepped into the hallway and walked toward the scent of food, garlic, and spices—whatever it was, it smelled amazing and made her stomach growl.
She froze in her tracks when she spotted Connor. He caught her eye and grinned. She hated how her heart fluttered. Hated that all day she’d been thinking about seeing him out running with his dog.
It should be illegal for guys to be that good-looking. She’d always gone for the wrong kind of guys, and her heart had the scars to prove it. But this last time, she really had learned her lesson. From now on, she was choosing sweet, humble guys. No exceptions. And definitely no guys who looked or acted like Connor.
“I was just about to call for you,” Anna said, glancing her way. “Dinner’s all but ready. Kaleb, can you grab the plates for me?” They disappeared into the kitchen. Ella was crashed on the couch after a long day of playing hard and loud, her blond curls covering most of her face. She was somehow able to sleep through the talking and the sound of plates and cupboard doors banging.
Connor stepped toward Faith, and she had the irrational urge to bolt in the other direction. Or maybe it was rational. He could pick her up and break her in half, after all. “You ran off this morning before I could—”
“Talk about the giant mark on my face?” she asked, crossing her arms.
He grinned. “No, I believe I covered that. But we could talk about it more if you want.”
She tilted her head. “Ha-ha.” Her muscles tensed, her guard rising from him being so close. She needed to control this situation. Show she absolutely wasn’t interested.
“Don’t feel bad. Happens all the time when girls look at me, actually.” He took another step toward her and lowered his voice. “What I’m trying to say is I was really drunk last night, and sometimes when I’m drunk I act a little stupid.”
“So what’s your excuse right now?” She figured the bitchier she was, the sooner he’d see she was more trouble than he wanted. Might as well nip it in the bud now, especially with how inescapable he was apparently going to be.
His gray, nearly translucent eyes lit up as a smile stretched across his lips. “I guess I’m just so stunned by your beauty.”
She shook her head. “Back when I was young and naive, I might’ve fallen for a guy like you. But I’m smarter now, so go try your lines on someone else.”
“But you’re the only one here.”
She started around him but he held out his arm, blocking her path. “And even if this room were filled with women, I’d still flirt with you. Just so you know.”
She worked to keep her voice even—bored, almost. “Well, just so you know, I don’t fall for lines, and it takes more than good looks to impress me.”
“So you think I’m good-looking.” He reached out and flicked the ends of her hair, the same way he had last night. “It’s big of you to finally admit it.”
Irritation wound through her, tightening the spot between her shoulders. “I think you’re the most frustrating person I’ve ever met. I’m still mad you talked my brother into something stupid and then you think you can just come in here and hit on me?”
“I was trying to apologize for last night. But now that you mention the hitting on you thing…” He gave a casual shrug. “I could probably get down with that.”
“You’re an ass.”
“And you have a nice ass.”
Faith stared back at him, her jaw clenched. She was wrong. She’d never dealt with this kind of guy before. He was a whole new level of cocky jerk.
“Are you guys coming?” Anna asked, sticking her head out the archway of the kitchen.
Connor gestured Faith ahead of him. He put his hand on her back as they started to walk toward the dining room, and she slapped it away.
She heard his low chuckle behind her, and she wondered if Kaleb would be mad or proud if she turned around and decked the guy. Why was her brother even friends with him?
As soon as she sat down, Connor scooted his chair right next to hers. She shook her head, doing her best to ignore his hulking presence as they passed around the food.
“This tortellini is amazing, Anna,” Connor said after they’d all dug in. “And the marinara sauce tastes as authentic as the kind my mama makes.”
Anna waved off his comment, but her entire face lit up.
How was everyone blind to how full of crap Connor was? He was one of those guys who said whatever it took to get his way, then burned you without a second thought—she’d know. She’d been fooled by several before, though Jeff definitely took the cake. Or condo and the future she’d planned, as it were.
Faith swallowed her bite of cheese-filled pasta—okay, it was pretty amazing—and turned to Kaleb. “By the way, I saw Paul and Brynn today. You never told me they were running the bait shop now.”
Kaleb bit into a breadstick. “They run the bait shop now.”
Faith nudged his leg with the toe of her shoe. “So helpful.”
He smiled, his cheek puffed up on one side because of the bread. “Not like I’m ever free to go fishing anymore. Maybe with training over, I’ll have some extra time.”
Anna raised her eyebrows. “Oh really?”
“I mean, after I take my beautiful wife out. Who wants to go fishing when that’s an option?”
Anna gave him a gentle shove, and he winked at her.
“I’m sure your job will only get busier now,” Faith said. “How’s the whole”—she took a deep breath and forced it out—“SWAT thing work, anyway?”
Connor’s cup clinked against the table as he set it down. “It means we do our usual job at the police station most days, but if there’s ever an emergency, we’re on call.”
Faith kept her attention on Kaleb. “Will they call you for an emergency in Charlotte?”
“Depends on how big the emergency,” Connor answered. “A few years ago, three other departments in Mecklenberg County formed a multijurisdictional SWAT team—Pineville, Matthews, and Mint Hill. I’ve been on Captain to do the same thing for North Meck.”
Finally, Faith couldn’t not look at him anymore.
He rested his knee against hers, and she doubted it was unintentional. “It’s about making the most of our resources,” Connor continued. “We didn’t have enough guys to make a full SWAT team, but all together, we’re able to increase response time and have a bigger pool to choose from. If something happened in Huntersville, Mooresville, or here in Cornelius, we’d be called to the site, instead of having to wait for guys from Charlotte. Now, the Lake Norman area is protected.” He flashed her a toothpaste commercial grin. “Don’t you feel safer?”
Faith refused to admit that it did make her feel safer, knowing trained men were nearby. Because it didn’t change the fact that her brother was the opposite of safer.
“There’s really not much chance of us going to the bigger cities, but if we’re needed, we’ll go.” Kaleb glanced at Anna before looking back at Faith. “We trained for extreme circumstances. But we’ll mostly be doing the same thing. Just think, if Dad were trained like I am n—”
“Please,” Faith said, holding up her hand. “Don’t go there.” She’d spent years going over the what-ifs, and it only made her feel worse. “You’ll never convince me that this is the safest option for you, because it’s simply not true.”
“But if—” Connor started.
She pointed her fork at him. “You don’t get a say in this at all. You have no idea what it’s like, and this is a family matter.”
“Faith,” Kaleb said in the scolding tone he’d used when he was in charge of her in high school. But she was old enough to make her own decisions now.
“It’s okay,” Connor said. “She’s right. I didn’t have to deal with what you two did, and I get why it worries her.” He turned his eyes on her. “You should probably know, though, that I consider Kaleb and his family my family, too.”
Compared to all the bull crap he spouted, that actually sounded genuine, and his expression matched. Appearing happy he’d cleared that up, he shoveled another forkful of pasta in his mouth.
Faith couldn’t help leaning in and saying, “Guess that makes us like brother and sister, then.” A smug sense of satisfaction ran through her when Connor nearly choked on his bite of food.
Point one to me.
“Uncle Connor?” Ella stood in the doorway of the kitchen, her blond curls mashed on the side where her face was also pink from being against the couch.
“Ella Ballerina!” He spun around in his chair, and she ran forward and launched herself into his arms. “How are you today?”
“Dood,” Ella said, putting her chubby hands on the sides of his face.
It was quickly becoming clear that Connor spent a lot of time here. Not that Ella was that hard to win over. Gum or anything involving sugar or princesses usually did the trick. But her face lit up as Connor bounced her on his knee, and he was clearly comfortable with her as well.
He smoothed a hand down Ella’s hair and a crack formed in the wall Faith had built around her heart. And that simply wouldn’t do. He actually went out of his way to form a SWAT team. He was full of himself…
Okay, so he was sorta beautiful, with his olive skin and stupid muscles and sexy, dark hair. And he was super sweet to her niece.
Point two to him.
“You hungry?” Connor asked, and Ella bobbed her head.
Anna started to get up and Kaleb put his hand on her shoulder. “I got it.” He took Ella from Connor, put her in her booster chair, and gave her a plate of food.
“So, Faith?” Connor said, glancing at her. “Why’d you move back here?”
“I just got my master’s in psychology, and I’m starting an internship at the UNC School of Medicine in the fall, where I’ll complete my clinical hours.”
“Psychology. Interesting.”
She didn’t know what he meant by that, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to. As she’d gone through the curriculum, she’d sometimes felt like a fraud, studying all the information on talking about your problems and confronting your past, when she still hid from hers. But she liked to think that she’d used what she’d learned and gotten better at dealing over the years.
Didn’t mean she was perfect.
Connor draped his arm over the back of her chair. “Maybe you can analyze me sometime.”
Kaleb cleared his throat and shot a pointed look at Connor. Connor shrugged and held his hands up for a moment before dropping them to his sides.
Interesting. That point might go to Kaleb, but I think it’ll work in my favor.
They made small talk through the rest of the meal. Ella was covered in marinara sauce by the end. Kaleb went to bathe her, and Faith insisted on doing the dishes so Anna could kick up her swollen ankles.
Surprisingly, Connor offered to help. Faith rinsed plates and set them in the dishwasher, focusing on the task, so she wouldn’t focus on the way the muscles in his arms flexed as he cleared the table. He set the dishes in the rack of the washer and turned, running his eyes down her. “You know, you’ve got the kind of legs that make me wanna be pants.”
Faith burst out laughing. “That does not seriously work on girls.”
“It does.”
“Maybe desperate drunk girls.”
Connor leaned in so close she could feel his warmth. “It’s working on you right now.”
“Sorry. You’ll have to do better than that.” She pushed him back with a hand to his chest and placed the last of the cups in the top rack.
“Okay, the line, while true, was more of a joke. But we should grab a drink sometime.”
Faith drew her eyebrows together. “That’s better? Here I thought you were some kind of player and you don’t have any game.”
He put his hands on the counter, on either side of her. “Damn, you’re as cold as you are hot.”
“I don’t even know what that means. Maybe I should just call my brother in here and see what he thinks.”
Connor’s smug grin faded. So there had been some kind of discussion. Within seconds he recovered though. “You need permission from your big brother?”
“No. I need a desire to go. And unfortunately for you, I’m immune to guys like you.” She patted his arm and moved past him. She could feel his eyes on her as she started the dishwasher, but she didn’t look at him again. As annoying as it was, confident men were sexy. Of course, they also used their confidence on any and all women, which was how they’d gotten so sure of themselves in the first place.
Ella came bounding into the room, dressed in a pink nightgown with Disney princesses on the front. This time, Faith was the one she ran to. Faith pulled her niece into her arms. “Should we braid your hair?”
“And paint nails?”
“Sure.” Faith grinned at Connor. “You want to paint nails, too? We’ve got a glittery pink that’s to die for.”
“Oh, I’m man e
Chapter One
The bar was bursting with guys tonight—seriously, it was like Muscles R Us up in here, all filled-out chests and bulging arms with biceps upon biceps. Under other circumstances, Faith might take a moment to enjoy the view. But right now, she was looking for one particular meathead, and she happened to be related to him. Anger had been building the entire four-hour drive from Atlanta, and now it pulsed through her like the loud music, wanting to be set free.
Of all the stupidest, craziest, good-way-to-get-himself-killed moves. It was no wonder her brother hadn’t told her what he was up to until she was on her way back to North Carolina, hours away from moving in with him and his family. Then Kaleb had thrown it out, all his words strung together. “By the way, I completed the SWAT program today and am a certified operator now. There’s a party at the Rusty Anchor to celebrate, so you should swing by if you get into town in time.”
And when Faith had opened her mouth to ask if he were serious, he’d said he had to go and hung up. But he’d later texted a picture of himself holding a certificate, his wife and daughter by his side, and told her the party was at seven. Like she’d actually want to celebrate something that would put him in even more danger than his current police job.
How can he do this to his family? His pregnant wife? His little girl? After all, Kaleb had seen firsthand what could happen in this line of work. He’d promised that he’d choose the safer path in his career. Faith hadn’t wanted him to go into law enforcement in the first place, but no, he had to go and try to be a hero anyway. And now he was taking it to another level by joining a SWAT team? Why couldn’t he let someone else’s brother be a hero? Her family had given enough.
Faith scanned the room as she moved farther into it, taking a second to look from face to face. Finding her brother in a place she used to frequent ought to be easy, but the lights were dimmed, and there were so many guys, all dressed similarly in black T-shirts. Several had swat emblazoned on their chests in white, and others bore cornelius sheriff’s department in smaller letters over their shirt pocket.
Faith tipped onto her toes—this would be a lot easier if everyone here wasn’t at least a foot taller than she was.
A guy approached her, beer bottle in one hand, smiling at her in that way guys do when they think they’re good-looking enough to smile and get anything they want. “My friend and I were just talking about what a sausage fest this was, and then you came in.” He ran his appraising gaze down her body, lingering on the V of her neckline.
Faith crossed her arms. “That works out, because I’m here for a weenie roast.”
He put a protective hand over his package—probably without realizing he was doing it—but his smile widened. “Oh yeah. You’re definitely coming to get a drink with me.” He reached for her hand, but she jerked it away.
“I’m actually looking for Kaleb Fitzpatrick,” she said as cheers erupted over in the bar area, swallowing up her words.
Big and Beefy glanced toward the noise and then returned his attention to her and leaned down. “Fitzpatrick, you say?” This close, it was impossible not to notice just how good-looking he was. His almost black hair was disheveled in a careless way, he had thick, dark eyebrows, and his eyes were a strange shade of gray that had to be a trick of the light. One corner of his mouth turned up, as if he knew she liked what she saw. So maybe she did, but it wasn’t like she’d go for a guy like him. The only thing worse than a guy with a hero complex was one who also had a huge ego.
“Do you know where he is or not?” she asked.
Despite the impatience she’d purposely put into her voice, the amusement in his features only grew. “Trust me, I’m more fun,” he said, taking cocky to the next level with a simple eyebrow raise.
She blew out a breath. “Obviously you think pretty highly of yourself, but trust me, you don’t wanna mess with me tonight.”
He reached out and flicked the ends of her hair. “Actually, the very reason I came over here was to mess with you.”
Faith made an extra-large eye roll. “Seriously, you’re gonna have to do better than that.”
Someone bumped into her from behind, causing her to stumble into the guy she’d been trying to break free from. He gripped her upper arms, his cold beer bottle pressing against her skin on one side as her hands braced against his chest, which she couldn’t help but notice was rock solid.
The guy smelled like beer and broken promises, and still her heart fluttered the tiniest bit, the traitorous stirrings of attraction going through her gut. Breath caught in her throat, she froze in place instead of pushing away like she should.
Then she spotted her brother and her momentarily missing common sense started working again. She pulled back from Big and Beefy as Kaleb approached.
“Hey,” Kaleb said, raising his voice over the din of multiple conversations and music. “Glad you could make it.”
Faith clenched her fists, her earlier anger rising up again now that her brother was in front of her. “Well, you’ll change your mind about that in about a second, because I came here to talk some sense into you, not congratulate you on being a well-trained idiot.”
“Jeez, back down, girl,” Big and Beefy said.
“Stay out of it,” she shot back at him, then returned her gaze to Kaleb. “Why wasn’t it enough to just be a cop? I don’t understand why you’d need to go and join a SWAT team on top of it.”
“Actually,” Big and Beefy said, taking a sip from his beer, “that was my idea. Thought we could use more of an adventure.”
She narrowed her eyes on him.
“Faith,” Kaleb said, “Connor didn’t mean—”
“You’re the one who talked him into this?” She jabbed his chest with a finger. “Maybe you want to go throwing yourself in danger at every turn, but my brother has a little girl and a baby on the way. He has a wife to take care of. I know your type; you don’t think of anyone else but yourself. And you”—she spun back to Kaleb—“you know the risks. How can you be such an idiot?” She hated the tears stinging her eyes. She blinked them back, refusing to lose it in the middle of the Rusty Anchor.
Big and Beefy—Connor, apparently—put his hand on her shoulder. “You need to relax. He’s a hero.”
“I wish he was a coward,” she spat. All the heat seeped out of her, followed immediately by an overwhelming sense of failure. She wasn’t sure what she thought would happen. Maybe that she’d yell and Kaleb would say he wasn’t actually going to go through with it. Or that he’d at least acknowledge he was breaking promises. “Fine. Go celebrate. Just don’t expect me to congratulate you.” The hours in the car caught up to her all at once. Her eyes burned, her muscles were tight, and she needed something to eat, preferably with someone she didn’t want to punch in the face. “I’m guessing Anna’s around here somewhere.”
Kaleb pointed over his shoulder. “Back corner in a booth.” As Faith started away, he reached out and gave her arm a gentle squeeze. “It’s going to be okay, Faithie. Going through the program means I’m better trained, and it’s not like there’s a lot of crime here. I just want to be prepared if there is. And the pay is better. I’ve got to think about that now that I’m going to have two kids to take care of.”
A tight band formed around Faith’s chest. “None of that will matter if you die before you get to see them grow up.” She walked past him, trying to shove back her emotions so she could go find her pregnant sister-in-law and try to be strong for her. This was one of the reasons Faith had chosen to go to college a couple states over. She knew she was a bit irrational about her brother’s career choice, but she couldn’t help it.
And coming back had just brought up all the memories she wasn’t ready to face.
…
Connor watched the short, curvy blonde walk away from him and Kaleb. “That’s your sister? She’s dramatic. And kind of a—”
“Don’t finish that.” Kaleb smacked the back of Connor’s head. “And stop checking out her ass.”
Connor took one last glance. When he’d seen Faith walk into the bar, he couldn’t look away. A moment before, he and Sullivan had been in a friendly argument over the tall brunette across the bar—Sullivan thought she was eyeing him, when she was clearly flirting with Connor—but then Faith had come in, and he was out of his seat before any of the other guys could hit on her. He hadn’t expected her to be so damn prickly. As she’d been yelling, though, he’d had the strangest urge to kiss her so she’d shut up. Well, and so he could kiss her. But there were plenty of other girls out there—no way he’d want to deal with that emotional hurricane.
Although, it was kind of fun getting a rise out of her. In fact, it was the least bored he’d been with a woman in a while, which was sad but true. And for all her talk, she was about to be putty in his hands before her brother showed up.
Kaleb cleared his throat.
Connor slowly pulled his gaze off Faith and shook his fuzzy head. “Give me a break—I’m drunk.”
“Just go point your wasted self at someone else. She’s already pissed off and going to be impossible to deal with. I don’t need you adding to the mess.”
Connor raised his hands, palms up. “I got it. Leave your sister alone. Now, let’s go get another drink.” Whether Faith liked it or not, they were celebrating. And they were heroes. The training had been killer—obstacle courses, shooting drills, sleep deprivation—and they’d survived. Together. Kaleb was one of his best friends, and his wife, Anna, was cool, too, which was why he liked hanging at their place so much—their house felt like his second home. As chill as Anna usually was, though, Connor could tell she hadn’t been thrilled about the SWAT thing, either.
Just another reason why he was in no hurry to settle down.
…
Faith slid into the back booth where Anna was seated. The table hid the bottom half of her belly, but the top was clearly rounded, and her sister-in-law had that pregnant-lady glow people talked about.
Faith glanced out at the rowdy sea of guys filling the bar and then back at Anna. “I don’t want to stress you out, but how are you not freaking out about Kaleb doing this?”
Anna shrugged. “I wasn’t exactly happy about it at first, but we discussed all the pros and cons and why he wanted to do it. Plus, I’ve had longer than a day to process it. I told him to tell you earlier, and even thought about doing so myself, but I didn’t want to get in the middle of it.”
Faith gritted her teeth. Of course Kaleb had waited to tell her, because he’d known how upset she’d be. She and Kaleb were both stubborn, and they’d fought plenty growing up. But they were also close, and if anyone messed with her, he made sure it never happened again. He’d always taken care of her and even let her boss him around a bit. Too bad he’d grown out of that, because she’d really like to force him to change careers.
Faith picked up the flip chart on the table with all the drinks and started turning the pages without really looking at the brews it bragged ab