*This originally ran on Buddyhead in August 2003
Here it is folks… another batch of LETTERS TO BUDDYHEAD that we actually made time for in between huffing paint to answer. To entertain all you internet geeks out there, we grabbed random emails sent to us over the last few months and Travis answered them the best he could. Of course, all the really juicy and interesting letters involving people who want to either sue us or kill us we aren’t allowed to post due to legal reasons. Our straight edge lawyer said he’d “firestorm” our asses. Those letters are the really fun ones too, so if you really need to experience these, maybe you can bribe a peek at them out of us with an offer of young hairless Philippino virgin boys. If you too would like to be a LETTERS TO BUDDYHEAD celebrity, just make yourself look really stupid by sending us your opinion on anything in life to: tmk@Buddyhead.com, or use the postman dude:
Buddyhead/po box 1268/Hollywood, Ca/90078.
Just remember that when you send us something, that just like every porno featuring bomb gay dudes, we own all of it. Like we’ve said before, none of these letters are made up. It’s frightening, we know. Ok… don’t get scared…
From: Rickmagee@aol.com
Subject: KILL FAT BASS PLAYERS
I would like to join your crusade against fat bass players. Fat asses who claim to be musicians that can’t move around, but only make goofy faces instead have no place in this world. And also, in addition to the bassist from NFG and AAF, you can’t forget about the bassist from Korn. He’s a fatass, and his band truly sucks donkey balls. And also, the bass player from NOFX, his name is Fat mike, but he’s not that fat, we should kill him for false advertisement.
Weekly meetings for the “KILL FAT BASS PLAYERS” club are held every Friday evening at the Buddyhead Office on Sunsete. Besides holding group discussions on fat bass players that need to die, it’s a pot luck as well, so bring a tasty dish.
From: “JOHAN AHON”
Subject: thank you to you
thank you send me your e_mail and ihopewe can join with you if you have information about straight edge movement please you e_mail to me ilike minor threat and fugazi who ian mckaye band now because ilike ian mckaye iwant to know about dischord release now and iwant know get the catalogue iwant to know the procedur and ihope we can make a friendship
Tom likes straight edge hardcore a lot too. Email him at TomA@buddyhead.com and he’ll also burn you one of his infamous “Best Of Bold” cd’s he tries to push on everybody.
From:
Subject: gadzooks
what’s with the ignorant 311 bashing? maybe you (Travesty Keller) should force your self to actually listen beyond the first two songs next time you review an album…the last four songs on From Chaos are my faves, for whatever that’s worth…and the live versions, as heard on their current tour, are slammin, brah…plus most of the crowd is teenage girls… you’re missing out!
Mmmmk brah… go ahead and count us as part of the “missing out” crowd.
From: “John Wright”
Subject: worst list…
I think you guys forgot to put the God awful Rx Bandits cd on the worst of 2001 list. John
We think you’re right.
From: “ThE kLePtOmAnIaCs”
Subject: help us
please add my band to your links.
thanks
A new girlie band in the early stages
kLePtOmAnIaCs
sOrRy kLePtOmAnIaCs bUt wE oNlY rEaLlY pUt oUr fRiEnDs oR bAnDs wE aLrEaDy lIkE oN tHe lInK pAgE.
From:
Subject: Fly PR
hey aaron (or whoever is reading this) it has taken us forever to try and track you down… we had an old phone number for you and every time we called we just got this answering machine…finally one day when i was calling this person freaked out on the phone and started yelling at us…needless to say we decided that was no longer the number to reach you, or anyone affiliated with buddyhead for that matter, at. so what is your new number…what’s your address…have you been receiving our releases…you should have gotten the dragons ‘rock n roll kamikaze’, stinking lizaveta, hector zazou/ sandy dillon, and stretch armstrong…were you able to do coverage on any of them…please get back to us so we can update our contact information…i really hope to hear from you soon…
Yeah dude, the person who “freaked out and started yelling” at you was Travis, cos you were calling HIS HOUSE. Like, EVERY DAY. How about this, you give Buddyhead all of your home phone numbers so we can wake all of you up every morning bugging you about really bad bands nobody cares about. (just like Stretch Armstrong) We’ll see how well you react to that after maybe the 50th call.
From: “Ty Stick”
Subject: There’s something wrong with your face.
Hey there, phockers. i read your ‘rules for being a rock star’ section and i must disagree with one of your rules. it’s the one about not being able to play a 7 string guitar or a bass that has more than 4 strings. most bands out there that use 7 string guitars do in fact blow, and their guitarists are usually no talent assclowns, but you must consider steve vai. talking shit about steve vai is like being a guy with a tiny tool who tells everyone that he has a small dick so that he can feel better about himself. it’s just something you shouldn’t do. another analogy you could use for talking shit about vai would be thinking that having a dog perform fellatio on you is a normal practice. about the bass thing, pull your head out of your ass. a lot of your theories about rock center around scoring gash, which i understand. But think about it this way: if you’re gonna play a 6 string bass, you better have big hands, and if you have big hands then you probably have big feet, and you know what women think about big feet. it’s a win – win situation. being able to have more fun with the bass and promoting yourself at the same time. so you should have said ‘don’t play a 7 string guitar or a bass with more than 4 strings if you’re in a nu metal band and have no technical skill.’ with that cleared up, if i got a band together that didn’t suck and started playing around hollywood clubs, would i be able to get a buddyhead shirt for free? cause i mean, that’s promotion for you guys. also, there can be fat guys in rock that can rule. listen to dredg, damnit. they have THREE fat guys in the band, and the bands that they are constantly compared to are TOOL, led zeppelin, and pink floyd. all you can say about that is ‘fuckin A, man.’ and lastly, set up some shows around hollywood with some bands that you guys are cool with. i want to see you guys try to ‘mack’.
Steve Vai? Huh? What the fuck just happened?
From: “Jeffrey A Stickney”
Subject: How To Be A Band
Dear Buddyhead,
In your section about becoming a band with the part about choosing a band name. I think you seriously made a mistake. The part where you said “Don’t Misspell your name” is a very good point. Korn, Limp Bizkit, Skrape, Puddle of Mudd, the list goes on are obvious examples of poorly produced band names. But you threw on your list “Strait Up”. There are several things wrong with this inclusion:
1) Strait Up is not a band name. Strait Up is a tribute album to Lynn Strait, singer of Snot.
2) There is a reason it is misspelled. It’s the fucking last name of the guy it’s a tribute for! Rather than a dumbass way to write a word, it’s a clever way to include his last name in the title of the album.
3) Even if you aren’t big fans of Snot – which I think is crazy talk, but to each his own – you should have respect for a dead man and his cool dog.
Snot fucking rules, the album fucking rules, and a big “Fuck you” to anyone who thinks it’s just another metal comp with no meaning.
Big Papa Jefe
“it’s a clever way to include his last name in the title of the album”? Yeah brah, I’ve got a clever way to figure out whether or not a “tribute album” is going to suck mad dong or not, and the first little tip off would be whether or not members of Sevendust, Kittie, Staind, and Incubus were involved.
From: Scott Botts-Wright
Subject: why?
Well…. lets all be bad ass punks and like the same music as eachother so we can get a favorable opinion from some shithead at buddyhead.com. After all this is what you are telling us to do….
fuck, get your brownfinger outta Goldfinger’s ass and how about doing something besides being an over the hill/glamrocker/walletchain sporting has been’s yes man? Aaron – Buddyhead
Well aaron, should we all like bands like the icarus line? The simple answer is no, why dont you just let everyone like what they fucking like…. because if you dont, your gonna move on to new bands. If the icarus line got really fucking popular, you would say “oh what a bunch of sellouts” but actually they just had enough talent and connections to hit it big, which is the goal of most bands. Some bands who say that isnt their goal just dont have any talent and play loud shitty punk rock and soft shitty emo. LEAVE PEOPLES MUSIC ALONE! fuck you
-scottyb
Ehhhhh… you might not have noticed this dude, but that little tidbit you read was under the MUSIC REVIEWS section. Sure we could make things easy by making a big list of all the new records that came out and then telling people to buy them cos like you said, “everyone likes what they fucking like” but then we’d be denying our role in the holy war that is “good rock” vs. “bad rock”. You my friend, if you happen to be into Goldfinger, would be a fan of music that would fall under the “bad rock” category. Seeing as how we have somewhere along the way become a little more enlightened and educated in the field of “good rock”, it is our duty as superior human beings to try and steer you into the path of righteousness and away from the evil that is known as Goldfinger, as well as many, many other “bad rock” bands. I know this is all making your head spin, but it will all make sense one day. I promise.
From: STARTSTOPEXPLODE@AOL.COM
Subject: Drowningman
Hey Turbo who ever does the gossip is either misinformed or just completly fucking retarded. Drowning pool on tour with converge my ass its drowing man. god damnit get your shit right . Oh and and if your so anti-fred stop posting shit its true he’s a tubby bastard and it was funny when you first started posting shit but its getting old get off his dick already.
p.s. Icarus line is pretty bad they should give it up i can put a guitar pick in ass and shake it on a guitar and would sound better.
Thank you , Vinny
Hmmm somebody named Vinny who not only has no sense of sarcasm and humor, but is well educated on Converge tour dates. Haha, Vinny. 20 bucks says at this very moment this same dude is about 300 pounds, and wearing a long sleeve Hatebreed shirt and bandana. Sorry The Icarus Line had to make things confusing for you by not charging into those moshdown parts for ya every 15 seconds. Hardcore kids should be taken out into the streets and shot in the face.
From:
Subject: message from steve-o (jackass)
How dumb must you people be to think I would be upset with PJ (Johnny Knoxville)? Really dumb. If you guys knew anything about the shit you were talking, never mind, you’re not worth the time. Get my e-mail address off of your website, right fucking now, and quit speaking on my behalf. You don’t know shit. Get anything with my name on it the fuck off of your website and,
fuck you?
Steve-O.
Ok Steve-O, we’ll get right on that.
From:
Subject: uhh.
have you ever heard the rumor or whatever about how people associated with good charlotte are saving up money to buy a shitty car then run into your house or a friends? i heard from a pretty close source that this shit was happening and since i respect buddyhead more than the others, i thought i’d let you in on it. and no, i’m not joking. this is in seriousness. there’s more to it.
Exnumberfour
Yeah, we heard about that too. When we first heard the news, it was somewhat similar to that feeling you had in the High School when you heard the girl you were finger banging in gym class’s little brother in 6th grade was pissed at you for it and was gonna “GI Joe your ass”.
From: THE LOCUST
Subject: your interview, if you wanna call it that.
hey. i just think its a little lame ot have a fake interview up there. we were pretty loaded and over wheight at that point. i mean its funny and all until it gets to fisting under age girls and shit. we have enough problem when we are already getting slashed tires, chairs and bottlen thrown at us, equipment stolen, maced, and tear gassed. i mean you can be a dick and keep a lame joke up if you want but we seriously are going to die or end up in jail due to all the stupid turds out there in the internet toilet that believe this shit. plus do you really think we would let such a fat slob in our band? come on, no spock haircut, no white belt. no fucking way. so i guess if you get time, please let me know if you will remove it or if you are going to be an asshole. thanks a lot.
luv, justin pearson
Oh c’mon, for having such a reputation as being a band that likes to “take the piss” outta people, fuckin lighten up dude. Besides, if all you say is true, don’t people believe worse shit than that anyway? Don’t worry, none of the hordes of white belt / spock / vulcan / monkey-cut fruitcakes mistook the interview for a real one. They have all your band member’s names and faces memorized and spend the better part of their days jerking off to the thought of being “down with you guys” and trying to figure out how to get the rarest pressings of your records so they can impress and convince other pathetic geeks on makeout club into getting naked with them. It’s all good.
From: “Drew Heffron”
Subject: on the locust interview
was that guy really from the locust? how old is that interview? i saw the locust one month ago and they were far from fat. they were lanky ass vegan guys with bad adittudes.. but it was an interesting show ( a guy in the crowd was offended and punched in the headlight on there van and slit his wrist )
just wondering
thanks
-drew
People can pack on pounds quicker than you think, just ask Aaron. It’s from bread.
From: “mike oxincider”
Subject: this is rad
hey…you gusy probably will never believe this but I live at the beach, just outside of jacksonville, florida….home of the unbelievabley sweet limp bizkit….so, staurday morning me and my friend go get some breakfast at this place, the Beach Hut….and who is there??…none other than that tubby bitch with man-tits, fred durst….and his fucking security guard….i guess it’s because he just bought this huge house at one of the clubs out here and he must be here for the summer or something i guess….anyway, his waitress was a friend of mine, so i asked her if she would write “Buddyhead is for the children” at the bottom of his bill when she gave it to him….when he got it and saw what was written at the bottom, he got really pissed and yelled at my friend and asked what the fuck that was suppossed to mean….she said that a friend had asked her to write it and that she thought it had something to do with the band and that she don’t know it would make him mad…he then called her a bitch and left…without paying his bill….it was so rad, i wished i had a video camera so i could have sent a tape to you…..Buddyhead is on the move on the east coast….slates…
Spicoli
Shit Spicoli… you spell like Spicoli too. Good work though my man.
From: Mike
Subject: too good for a subject
Hey Aaron Icarus how about writing reviews that are even a bigger waste of time for anyone to read? I put more effort into pissing than you put in your reviews. I’d say that if your reviews were a contestant on Survivor, it would be the first to be voted off. So how about trying to like some punk that doesn’t fall under the category of being the crack-baby of late 70’s anti-gov shit? (aka hardcore) Or how about writing about how much pop punk sucks once, instead of over and over for every record? but what do I know?
Mike
Well Mike, apparently there seems to be approximately 193,374 horrible pop punk bands in this country, and every month more and more of them feel it is absolutely crucial to send their album to us to review. Then we have to tell them they suck over and over again. Hey don’t blame us. In a perfect world, Buddyhead would never receive a bad pop punk record ever again, and we would have nothing but nice things to say. Let’s all hold hands and pray for a better tomorrow, wuddya say Mike?
From: “Mike Williams”
Subject: Is buddyhead.com for sale?
To whom it may concern,
We have just tried to register domain name buddyhead.com and found out that you have already registered it. For our strategic marketing purposes, we would like to know if your domain name is availabe for sale or for lease.
Thank you,
Sincerely
Mike Williams
Lease? What do we look like, a used car lot?
From: Haavocck@aol.com
Subject: hey look
alright dick suck, anyone that disses Linkin Park, deserves to get the living shit kicked out of em, you saying how un-original they are, think again you piece of used covered in shit toilet paper, there is NO other band like them, and if you feel like you need to piss someone off, piss off your mom, it might make her sexual advances on you less frequent you sick bastard,
sincerely,
a linkin park, offspring, limp bizkit, papa roach, metallica, nfg, and all the other good stuff fan
p.s.- all the so called “good” stuff, actually sucks ass, and that’s y i, nor anyone else has probably ever heard of em, cause only fags like you listen to it
Damn . I’ve never thought of it that way. Basically, if a band isn’t on MTV and nobody knows about them, they must suck cos they aren’t on MTV huh? Excellent. And anybody who does like a band that isn’t on MTV all day must be a “fag”. Infinite wisdom I tell you. Infinite. Dude, I’m telling you, you’re onto something here. MTV should be paying you to come up with their advertising slogans. They could make you a millionaire, and all you’d have to do is sit in a big office and come up with stellar ad campaigns such as: “MTV. If you don’t like it, you’re a fag.”
From:
Subject: regarding aaron farley in paris
i was going through the archives, as i tend to, and stumbled across the aaron farley par le vous. i imagine the section is too old for this to have any pertinence, as well as the fact that you’ve more than likely already received email regarding the descrepancy, but the last picture is captioned incorrectly. ya’ll said peeps be taking mad pictures of the venus, but the statue in that particular picture is the something winged whatever of victory. we went last summer. my stepdad is all about art. i knew (for about 15 minutes) everything there was to be known about anything we saw. methinks you might be wrong about that caption… but then again, i may be the fool. what do us east coast kids know, anyway?
sammy b.
also, where might i score buddyhead stickers? you guys still have them? i went to the buddyheadstore briefly, but i couldn’t find my asshole with two hands up in that place.
Direct all concerns, comments, and thoughts about the country of France to aaronfarley@buddyhead.com. He’ll be more than happy to field all questions relating to the matter. Oh yeah, buy a shirt in our store and you’ll probably get stickers in the package too.
From: Anniebandito@aol.com
Subject: …
Whoever was spinning at the Beauty Bar last wednesday fucking rules. When I walked in my favorite Blonde Redhead song was playing followed by My Bloody Valentine. The great music really helped me tolerate the Alpha Gamma Herpes sororiety chicks that were cackling next to me for a large portion of the evening. Unfortunately I had to leave when people wearing fringe leather jackets showed up. I got scared. Anyway, just wanted to say thanks.
annie
The DJ with no timing was Travis. He prides himself on timing not getting in the way of his drinking.
From: Kenny Preski
Subject: Where Can I get Your Enemies Friends?
Hey, that new band you guys are talking about sounds badass. I checked your store, those limited edition box set cds you were talking about aren’t there. Where can I buy it?
-Kenny
Kenny, you happen to be out of luck on the box sets. They are already sold out. But the regular cd version is now available and it’s just as bomb. Buy it.
From: “Ira Wray”
Subject: Good bands from Florida
The Mercury Program.
Gainesville.
Booyah.
NAW BRAH!
From: michael greenland nobehaviour@hotmail.com
Subject: who’s ripping who??
Just in case you were vaguely interested (which i know you are because u hav nothing better to do all day except beg for donations and slag off bands who are more succesful than you), the word/phrase/whatever, ‘brah’ actually originates from the African country, Zimbabwe. In Zimbabwe we have a race known as ‘coloureds’, who are basically people of mixed race. us peeps in the coloured community have been using the term ‘brah’ since the late ’50’s. In our community it basically means ‘brother’, as in close friend. for example; ‘Hey brah, pass me the fermented milk’, or ‘Hey brah, why’d you fuck my sister. That wasn’t cool brah.’
so, um, yeah. stop ripping us off brah. Peace.
We never said we invented it dude. Sounds like sarcasm isn’t something that translates well to people in Africa I suppose. Besides, “Naw Brah” is out now. Fuck, even “No Bro” is now passe. In the 2002, it’s all about the “Nada Brada”.
From:
Subject: +{}´¿’985432
FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU’RE AN IDIOT I HOPE YOU READ THIS. YOU’RE KINDA STUPID AND BELIEVE ME LIMP BIZKIT DOESN´T NEED YOU TO CONTINUE. THEY’RE THE BEST OF THE BEST WITH OR WITHOUT YOU.
FINALLY ,ONCE, FUCK YOU.
SINCERELY:
THE #1 FRED’S FAN
PS:ANSWER ME MY E-MAIL IS LAPAULAGMJC@LATINMAIL.COM
I’LL BE WAITING FOR YA.
Somebody email this kid a virus please.
From:
Subject:
hey,
I had a pressing question and i didn’t know where to turn. Is there an oficial site for the band Cursive? Any help is great. I think that it would be a good feature to have a list of band’s web sites on buddyhead, but I know you do whatever you want.
Thankyou
A good feature would be to list band’s websites? No bro.
From: “Joe Loser”
Subject: Pledge of Allegiance
It’s been awhile since I’ve checked the gossip page at buddyhead.com, a page that seems to be flooded with calling the Drive Thru Records company a bunch of tubby bastards and insulting Fred Durst (not that I’ve got a problem with that). But every so often you guys will release some information which hints that you’ve done some research on the subject and are reporting facts which you believe to be true. I just checked out your update on the Pledge of Allegiance tour, and you look like idiots to the people who have ever listened to Slipknot. Granted, you’re not preaching to that crowd, but it wouldn’t kill you to get your facts straight before posting it on the internet (not like anyone else does, though). Slipknot isn’t a group of Satan worshippers. The Heretic Anthem, in fact, is their only Satan related song, and if you took two minutes to read through the lyrics, you’d see that it really isn’t all that Satan related. It has more to do with the social aspect of religion, and how people get into the holier-than-thou mentality. Hence “If you’re 555, then I’m 666″ (666 being a level higher than 555, in case you didn’t catch that). The giant 666 was there to, naturally, excite the crowd. As for the patriotism, that goes along with everything Slipknot does in fact believe. Of course, you didn’t include this when you wrote about it on the gossip page, but Corey (the singer) made it perfectly clear that what he was angry about was the hate crimes that resulted from the attack. He draped himself in the American flag to show that he supports America in getting rid of terrorism, and in supporting America, he supports American unity.
A majority of Slipknot songs have to do with how sick people can be in hurting other people (for example, “Purity”), and also social labeling and oppression, shown by how they assigned numbers to themselves and wear masks. Satan wasn’t mentioned once in any of the three albums they’ve released. But that doesn’t matter, now does it? Oh, and thanks to the seperation of church and state laws, Satan worshippers can *finally* be patriotic as well! Of course, you only show and tell what will make your loyal readers dislike any band that you dislike, but I guess if they don’t know that you’re presenting half-truth propaganda, they aren’t the types of people who have much choice in music, anyway.
As for the drum solo, well, it’s all a matter of personal opinion. I thought it was cool, and I also think that Joey is an amazing drummer.
I realize that you won’t take this seriously, if you even by any chance read it, because it’s from another stupid teenager, so I implore you not to post this. I realize that I’ve made the mistake already of writing a letter that doesn’t praise your site, and I don’t expect a serious response in return, but I don’t want what I’ve said misrepresented on your website. This letter isn’t to your readers, it’s to you, the staff, or whomever reads it. And please, if you do post it, don’t cut parts out of it, as you do to reality on the gossip page. Well, buddy on, buddyhead.
Love,
ATWISBMPB
Woooooooooah bro… lighten up there Mr. Super Fan. I’ll put 20 bucks on a bet saying this kid has one of those Slipknot jumpsuits. Calm down there fanboy, you just defended a drum solo that took place on a 40 piece drum kit 50 feet above the audience. I bet if you were born 10 years ago you would have been pretty impressed with Tommy Lee’s flying drum solo as well. Also, we didn’t edit you at all there champ. Congratulations.
From:
Subject: blah blah blah
Where does a beer drinking, socially reclusive, 21 year old whose been playing guitar for 7 years, find a band to join that doesn’t suck or worship rap-rock??
Seattle?
From: “Shaina Lacher”
Subject: Lance
Lance,
whats up. It’s Christian just want to know how your doing. My phone number is (605) 225-6932 my address is 19 8th ave. SW Aberdeen SD 57401get a hold of me as soon as you can and you can try to call me collect if that doesn’t work just use a calling card. so get a hold of me asap love you Christian. you can email me at
smurf0084@home.com paz
Lance doesn’t answer email. Especially email sent here. Try him at home. 50 bucks says he’s either A) playing video games B) smoking pot, or C) both.
From:
Subject: question
great site but i have a question… do you guys cover a certain local scene or do you guys cover underground music in different areas of the US? thanks alot, if possible put this on your dumb questions page! weee!
word to your mom!
zac, aurora Colorado
Will do. Dumb questions don’t get answered.
From:
Subject: funny guys
heh heh heh…i am only 14 (i skate too), and am big indy rock fan, and i like how you guys are cynical assholes towards bad music like limp bizkit. thanks for loads of laughs
moose
P.S.-Fuck MTV and all their stupid superficial comical music
Bomb. When we were 14 we were playing nintendo and jerking off to scrambled porn. Props on being cool for your age kiddo.
From: David bqs@gte.net
Subject: Re: The vinyl masters ???????
Hey –
I see all this great stuff happening and ask myself,
“Why haven’t I been ‘cutting’ the vinyl masters for BUDDYHEAD???”
David Cheppa, owner
Better Quality Sound
That’s funny… when we see all this stuff it makes us ask ourselves, “Why haven’t I been cutting the cheese?”
From: “SIlly Dove”
Subject: beans
hello,
i was wondering if you still publish the zeen? If so i would like so subscribe. I am living in England, but unfortunatly and American. I am doing a essay on undergroudn mags and it seems all of them are no longer publishing. This is pissing the fuck outta me. SO please say you have copies i need them,i will eat beans for them. Also i would be interested in working for some lowlife publication like yours someday i am going to a art school that it toally useless but what the hay. Just give me your mag. if you have them i will send you a pony and maybe a circus midget i keep under the stairs..
-treena
Funny… we were thinking we’d like to work for us too. In the meantime we’re busy suckin dicks for pocket change.
From: MadMadonna@aol.com
Subject: hiya
Hey travis,
i just gotta say, you are so gorgeous!! oh, and i hope one day soon that you beat the hell out of a cerain Mr. Durst, someone needs to deflate his head, and i think you’d be the perfect person!!
love you lots
vodka shots
Sammi
Thanks for the vote. Now let’s hear it for violence!!
From: Dan Pappas
Subject: YOU HUFF MAD DONG
Sorry for the inconvenience of spelling “pussies” wrong. I would expect a much cleverer comeback from you the CEO of Buddyhead. Oh yeah, you still huff mad dong and your website is still a shit talking disgrace to the music community. If you have any questions feel free to e-mail me at dan-p@manofmystery.net.
See ya in cyberspace
PS: Buddyhead is the enemy.
Sure dude.
From: ” Eric Schnee”
Subject: Buddyhead
The other day i was sitting in history class bored off my ass with three other kids. My teacher left the class for a few mintues so i decided it would be a great idea to humor my peers by showing them Nate’s “How to have sex” cartoon. I showed them a few of the cartoons and a jolly chuckle was had by all. I left the webpage before my teacher came back. But then, to my great misfortune, my good friend Aaron (the kid who bribed you with fred durst info if you would say NFG rules) went to the “archives” page where theres an image of the two gay men grabbing eachother’s thonged asses. Of course my history teacher turned around and saw this, flipped out and went right to the browsers history and saw the cartoons i had just been two. Being a man of honor, i admitted that i had been to the site and i was not ashamed of my actions. Then as my history teacher was looking at the cartoons this other teacher came in. They tried to act all shocked but they knew they thought it was funny. By this point everyone in the room was pissing themselves with laughter. One teacher tried to bribe me, saying that if i bought him and the other teacher lunch they would’t tell the pinciple. I sticked it to the man and said NAH BRA! Fuck the system! I spent the next twentie minutes trying to explain to the teachers that buddyhead is not a “kiddie porn” site and that it is for the children. Oh well, they simply just didnt get it. It was truely one of the most embarrassing experiences of my life. Therefore, for the pain i had to endure due to the ignorance of the teachers, i feel i deserve a large buddyhead “fist and star” t-shirt in red. If you give it to me, I’ll wear it to that class every single day, showing everyone that i dont let the man fuck with me.
How about a high five instead? Whatayasay champ?
From: D Scott scott@quitterarmy.com
Subject: Question.
I dig your site alot and it tells it like it is. I lurk on the board because it can be funny. I was just curious if you really did live the life thats portrayed ie:coke, strippers, guns and shit. It just seemes like you are good at site work and photography and i would think they would get in the way. Is it some blend of all? I have no clue why Im asking. Im guess its just because im up late and im fucking pissed about somthing so it was obvious. Ask Travis at Buddyhead if he really digs coke. Whatever. Take care.
-DS
No, that’s kind of a joke. If that were all true, we’d never update our site. I mean come on… drugs? What we’re really into here at Buddyhead is collecting stamps, sniffing glue, and torturing little furry woodland creatures. Usually all at the same time.
From: sandra shamy strawberryblink@hotmail.com
Subject: hey
dear buddyhead,
i really like your site, but by any chance i was wondering if u can take the picture of me off of ur site. My parents went to the site and saw it and were hella mad. the reason im on there is cause i won tickets to a concert.my name is sandra shamy, so please please take it off.
luv,
Sandra
Sure thing Sandra. All you have to do is send us back your concert experience, (make sure to package it really well so it doesn’t get damaged, you know how those postmen are) then we’ll take the photo down.
From:
Subject: Hey dude….
well, except for the occasional sucking of Blink 182’s dick, I gotta say yer site cracks my shit up. The Hessian Love bit is enough laughs fer a week. I have sent everyone I know to yer site just to check it out (yer welcome). But two quick things: First, I have noticed alotta incidents where you will tear apart a band in one page, and then hype em up on another…..I am sure this is due to the varying oppinions of the writers, so I will let this slide. (again, yer welcome.) The other thing is a suggestion: How about an article on bands who should fight to the death, to determine who is the Meanest Mother Fuckers in rock. (Though I already know that the winner would be Deadbolt.. those guys could wail the shit outta every metal band all at the same time,and when the were done eating the dead, go to their homes and hate-fuck their wives and moms…also, the have the hottest sluts for groupies, which just goes to show how bad-ass they are.) Anyways, do this…cause I said so….
Sure dude.
From: “Jaymz – Your Name Here”
Subject: cool
Just a message to say that you guys touched the heart of a lonely boy out here in Melbourne, Australia….
Here’s to emo!
Jaymz
Here’s to emo? Here’s to no bro!
From: “Candice Rivera”
Subject: will work for sex
hey
my name is Candice and im a 20 year old student. I couldnt help but be blown away by your site. i would very much like to be a part of your guys world. i have many mediocre talents such as music knowledge (ive worked in almost every record store in Hollywood), stylist , and i speak openly about sex. well i hope you can use me. if you want to contact me im best reached by pager. 323.982.6466.
Wow, a record store employee from Hollywood! We’ve been searching for someone with that kind of experience forever, we just didn’t know where to look. Good thing you emailed us! Come in tomorrow and we’ll use you! Readers, feel free to use her as well.
From: “woof”
Subject: FOUNDATION
Yeah I’m gonna exploit my friend’s email addresses so that I can “WIN” a fucking foundation deck.. I doubt you even give them away.. I ordered some shit from you and it took your asses about 6 months to get my money back because you are such a big fucking business now. Mass marketing like a corporate peice of shit and you preach punk ethics.. FUCK YOU GUYS.. Cool site though 
I like the web design.
Wanna buy a shirt?
From: agent parks earthliberation@hotmail.com
Subject: too hazy to see that far
Travis, Is it just me or have you been doing so many drugs that you have actually become tolerant? Your record reviews might even be construed into someone believing you were a halfway nice person. Have you been getting laid on a regular basis lately?
.Jason.
Yes he has. Don’t thank him though for his improved record reviews, thank your mom and sister.
From: XSayAnythingX@aol.com
Subject: Dumbass Travis
In his review Travis said Zero Zero is from Delaware..there from New Jersey…it’s everyone that had absolutely no use in lifetime and was stupid enough not to join Kid Dynamite…and some chick. Not really an important side note, but a note anyway.
And while your kicking Travis in the face for that mistake and thinking the new Alkaline Trio isn’t for drunken 8th graders – stop advertising that TEXT record as ex-refused and just “four Swedish guys making shitty noise that you could record better in your mom’s basement.”
And what’s the excuse for not saying anything about Amnesiac in any of the new reviews….but good job getting 50 Shat mentions in…we all love to get updates on everyone’s favorite Megan’s law offender in NJ Jeff Wood! Seriously keep up the good work there.
Any truth to the rumour the that Travis is gunna sing for DEP…does that mean the girl from 10 things I hate about You will be at their shows?
Tim
Delaware… New Jersey… it’s all the same thing dude, wasteland.
From: Zemerous@aol.com
Subject: hey there…
Hi Travis, I’m just a random guy that happened to see you at the taping of The Late Late Show with Jimmy Eat World. You just caught my eye, so I thought I’d drop you an email. By the way, I think Buddyhead is fucking hilarious, so keep that good shit up!! Haha. Well that is basically all I have to say, I feel like a little a stupid kid sending this, but you were too damn hot, and thought you deserved to know. =)
EriC
Woooah Travis, more and more of these “random guys” for you. HIT DAT SHIT!
From: “Erik Nolke”
Subject: you were right
dammit the revolution smile are fucking amazing live. i caught them in san jose tonight and i wanted to thank you for suggesting them on the gossip list (which is great also).
thanks,
erik
That’s what we’re here for.
From: Cherry Cheeks
Subject: hello.
you don’t know me. but i know you. i live in NYC. i want to know how i can make aaron icarus fall in love with me.
please help me. i must have him. i must.
kisses,
cherry
p.s. please don’t tell him that i wrote you.
HIT DAT SHIT A-ROD!
From: “Aline Di Paula Pascoal”
Subject: axl rose
hello,haw are you? i like very axl rose,if you have the address him please give-me i want send a letter for axl rose. thanks sorry the mistakes.
aline (rio de janeiro)
Weee is fine. Thunks for assing! We dont gots Axl rose address, sawree.
From: jaclyn Smith JaclynSmith@hotmail.com
Subject: You
travis, You R way Sexy! Based on your picture anyway.
Based on your email, you’re deep.
From: Ollie Hargrave
Subject: nothing really
ok…I know I’m suppose to say something worthwhile..or whatever…(there’s a but) but I’m not. just wanted to congratulate Tom Apostolopoulos on his review of Playing Enemy’s Cesarean record… the “like if a bear fucked a gorilla, this would be the soundtrack” bit made me piss myself… i don’t even know why i bothered sending this e-mail…probably cos it’s 7 30am and i haven’t slept…maybe it’s cos i’m a twat… i think i’ll become one of those peoples complaining to kids tv shows saying that i could see the female presenters nipples or something.
Woah Tom has a little fan there. Tom… HIT DAT SHIT!
From: DValles
Subject: waaaahh!
the reveiws always kill me. it’s nice to see appreciation for the black crowes. not something i would expect from the head. i made like $1100 off the black crowes scalpin’ tickets when they played the roxy like 2 years ago. gotta finance the music career somehow. good band! i heard a bunch of motherfuckers at maverick lost thier fuckin jobs over tantric. rightfully so. they also should have drawn and quartered them like they did in the olden days, having a horse tied to each limb and sent in different directions. maybe they can put in an application over at drive-thru records! oh, wait, they’re all stocked up on shitty music. later, you angry bastards.
-d
Werdemup.
From:
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Enjoy this while you still can, because I have talked to a lawyer whom you will be hearing from vey soon. You can’t use my birth name it seems, so you better put all those small brains of yours to work and come up with something else!
Somebody new wants to sue us? Get in line.
From:
Subject: speak up cutie
I’m gonna make this fast, your gossip is going down hill and so is the rest of your page. I know your not gonna give a shit cause you have that “I don’t care attitude” but you should really sit down and think about what your doing. 6th grade but humor gets old fast. have a nice one-Sean
We’re thinking about it right now. Thanks for the heads up sporto.
From: “Charlene Barretto”
Subject: hook me up with gideon!
hey yo, i was just reading the gossip section. said gideon is looking for a woman- hook me up yo! he’s cute. i’m actually kind of kidding but i thought i’d write anyway in case you guys can really hook me up. that other guy brian is cuter though- if he’s available- hook me up! well i feel like an idiot actually writing in for this. i’m too old to be doing this. ha. how old are those guys anyway? i’ve been asexual long enough and i go to nyc all the time….i’m probably not his type. oh well. here’s a picture of me. it’s an old pic- but it will do. see ya.
Charlene
Hey Gideon, HIT DAT SHIT!
From: “Travis Keller”
Subject: Your Name
I implore you to stop impersonating me! This absurd behavior must stop! If you do not stop with this foolishness, then I’ll be forced to contact my attorney.
Thanks,
T. Keller
We’ll get right on that.
From: shaul shultze@negba.org.il
Subject: hi
Hi !
My name is shaul and i am from israel. few days ago i heard about your music magazine from someone of my friends and I realy like what i heard about him. next week i am joining the army and i already planed to subscribe to one of the music magazines there are in the market, so i could read it whill im in the base! . my question is : can you send me a copy of your magazine or even a sample so i could realy understand what kind of magazine i am signing for . that way i will be sure this is the right one for me (didnt find the magazine in israel) .. it will be realy great if you could send it to me
thaks again
shaul sivan
kibutz negba
doar na sde gat
79408
ISRAEL
Ehhhhh somebody send this dude something. We feel bad. Tell him Buddyhead sent ya.
From: “Peter Falkous”
Subject: Re: YOU ARE RIPPING OFF OUR SHIT – BUDDYHEAD
first off dude sorry, i honestly am, i never meant anyone to see this site as its part of my university course, heres what happened, i completed the website and handed the work in, with none of your work at all, i then a few days later was contactted by my lectures and they said that they had lost all my work, i had a bout 2 days to do 3 years work and i could not salcvage all my images so i quickly used yours, i am sorry about that but it should have been taken down ages ago and it will be when i gte home on thursday, i know its a pain in the arse for you and all i can do is say sorry but by thursday night it will be no longer there, and will be replaced with new original graphics which hopefully will have been fopund
again sorry and i will write to let u know when the sites down
thanks pf xxx
As far as we’re concerned it’s over. But Jeff Wood is another story. See, we told him that you were telling people that Shat sucked mad goat dong. He’ll be at your house anytime now.
From: Vision743@aol.com
Subject: London calling
aaron,
hey i saw you guys are coming over here in february (london). if the icarus line need drugs, girls, or a place to stay while here, let me know..although i’m sure you already have that taken care of…
-jeff- (expatriot and avid buddyhead reader)
The Icarus Line are moving to England.
From: “Vince”
Subject: Your website is still really lame…
If you are not the Buddyhuncher who answered my letter (originally sent from mofokin@mindspring.com)then please forward it to the appropriate one. I assume it was you though so I just wanted to say how proud I am of you for updating your site. You can’t polish a turd though Travis. You were obviously too busy daydreaming about “exploring every nook and cranny” of someone’s rectum to comprehend what I was saying in the beginning of my e-mail. I am fully aware that nobody forced me to look at your site but I did and I have as much right to voice my opinion as you do. I do have to say that I respect the fact that you post letters regardless of derogatory content. I went online to look for a few un-biased record reviews and found your site. The people doing the reviews were basing them on the label it’s on or some other trivial bullshit, sometimes without even listening to it. Then I discovered the rest of the shitpile that is Buddyhead. I admit there was a bit of traffic accident fascination with the things I saw, but I only spent enough time there to check everything out and e-mail you. I mean, how could you look at such a big pile of shit and not say to yourself, “Gee…that’s a pretty big pile of shit.” ? I don’t like to let preconceived notions influence my opinions, something you seem to be fond of at Buddyhead. Thanks for posting my last e-mail by the way. I think that’s just super! Oh…and thanks for the free psychological evaluation too, even though it’s grossly inaccurate. You make lots of assumptions based on what you know about me, which is… absolutely nothing. First off I don’t do the self-mutilation gimmick, I never once “gorged” myself at a shitty restaurant, I hate Oprah, and I’m not fat. Do YOU ever gorge yourself on anyone’s fucking genetalia? Do you ever find yourself devoting your time to running a shitty web site chocked full of fascism and hypocrisy? Do you ever send any fucking porn to little kids who made the mistake of giving you they’re e-mail address? Does that excite you? I think you have some pretty serious issues to deal with pal. Get help! Remember…If you can’t get help at Charter, then please, get help somewhere.
Hey Dill-rod, it’s clear you have lots of free time… fill a bit of it up with reading the paragraph at the top of the record reviews page. It clearly states that our record reviews are biased. That’s what makes them fun. That, and getting emails like this because of them. Thanks fruitbasket.
From: “Jeff Fairley”
Subject: the inevitable abuse and pranks i will recieve….
hey hey kids…
ok, firstly i realise that youre gonna take the piss out of me somehow and thats cool. im an ‘emo-bitch’ and i found your terming the phraes poignant pretty damn funny. also im writing from england (something else for you to take the piss out of. i do love crea tea. and the queen) but basically… the icarus line fucking rule. thats what i wanted to say and i could go on forever about the album but i wont cuz though im an emo-bitch i dont lick ass. for free. and your site is very cool. any chance of updating the reviews section? and any chance you could get axl to skull-fuck the ataris, i hate that pop-‘emo’-moron-punk.
thanks kids
jeef
I think we already did that. Cheers chum.
From: “indie anna”
Subject: waaaaasssssssuuuuuuuuuup, sike.
Hey,
Ok, so I have NOT heard the best things about buddyhead…I have been to your site (or not site) a few times and well…evertime I see it I like it. So I really don’t know what anyone is talking about. I saw the blood brothers on it and an interview with MIKE D, who can not LOVE that? I really like all the graphics too. That sex cartoon is a little ugly though and if you post this in letters to buddyhead I will slit your fucking throat actually I don’t really care but I just wanted to say yeah I really like buddyhead
-indieanna xoxo
anna
You are an excellent writer Anna. Tell your friends to lighten up. Better yet, find new friends.
From: Catherine Hoodless c_hoodless@hotmail.com
Subject: Something intelligent for a change
I used to think your website was really good but lately I’m not so sure. I thought Buddyhead was aimed at people who are interested in music, films, culture etc, but it appears that anyone who is NOT an arrogant, sexist, homophobic, aggressively offensive arsehole is excluded.
If you wish to challenge this please refer yourself to any one of Gary Busey’s postings. How do you think it feels if you’re female and every reference to women you read is bitch, whore or slut? And I am not uptight or prudish – you can talk about drugs and sex as much as you want but to read people boasting about emotional, sexual exploitation and violence, laughing at women being used and degraded (viz, “Did you see those chicks eat each other out? I shoved my elbow up her ass, ha, ha, ha”) – SHOW SOME FUCKING RESPECT.
Trust me, that kind of attitude is a sign of immaturity. Why don’t you direct your aggression and hostility towards bad people for a change? Be nice and I’ll keep on reading your magazine.
Catherine
p.s. Men who hang around strip clubs are sexually inadequate, that’s a fact.
The messageboard is not our site you stupid fucking bitch whore. Haha. Just kidding. But no seriously… how can you judge Buddyhead based on what a bunch of random strangers say on a public messageboard? Silly. Plus, “Gary Busey” is just trying to make up for all the bad he’s never done in the world cos in actuality he’s a big hug-able straight edge teddy bear that drives a purple car. No shit.
From: “Dave Herrera”
Subject: no talking, just head.
Travis,
When I fired up the new issue of Buddyhead this morning, I didn’t think of Ice Cube, as you suggested. Rather more appropriately, LL’s infamous words came to mind, “Don’t call it a comeback, I’ve been here for years…” Truer words never spoken.
Let the naysayers say what they will about Buddyhead. However, until they have successfully ran their own site, their criticism falls on deaf ears. They’re just mad cause you tell the truth about all the grabasses out there. Most of haters fall into three categories: They are either publicists who are oblivious to the fact that you don’t exist to fatten their press kits; or other sites that don’t realize there is room on this here net for all of us; or bands that resent you for pulling back the curtain and showing everyone that it’s all done with smoke and mirrors. If all these people spent as much time and energy working to put out a quality product as they did hatin’, they wouldn’t have time to talk shit.
Even though our sites are diametrically opposed, we feel we are kindred spirits. You’re the pissed off bros we used to be before we moved to the burbs, got mortgages and had babies. Subsequently, we got your back…even though you don’t need it.
By the way, the interviews you just published from IL and Frodus are two of the most insightful I’ve read in quite some time. It should be obvious to everyone within earshot that they are/were the best things going.
Bros. In Arms,
Dave Herrera
Testify. A big slap on the ass awaits you in Hollyweird.
From: “Marshall”
Subject: taint
This is for Travis. I just finished reading your December review of that Limp Bizkit album who’s name is too long and retarded to type you, and I simply loved the FOUR axl skull-fucks, because limp bizkit sucks complete and total ass. However, HEY DICKLIPS, THERE IS ALREADY A WHO SONG CALLED THAT! YOU AREN’T THE WHO! YOU AREN’T EVEN ANYWHERE NEAR AS GOOD AS THE SWEAT BETWEEN THE NUTSACK AND ASSHOLE OF THE WHO’S DRUMMER has one error. I believe you are referring to a “taint” of the who’s drummer I point this out because my band is called Acne Taint and i think the word “taint” is drastically underused. Otherwise, good review!
Thanks. We should set up some shows with Acne Taint and the Buddyhead staff side project band, Baggy Spandex. Travis plays the kazoo. It’s bomb. We can do a split.
From:
Subject: hello
can u have some celebrities interested in a celebrities chat with fans at my club please have them contact me at this email address or my Aol instant messager screen name at Jumahmuhammad please no riders promitted because it will be in a chat room and that iam a 15 year old boy in the 9th grade ok thanks get back to me please
Jeff Wood will be contacting you shortly to set up the first ever SHAT CHAT.
From: “dan magnum”
Subject: shit and mtv2…
i don’t know if you are the same travis keller who is caught doing handclaps on the new jimmy eat world album, but if you are, your name was mentioned on a j.e.w. documentary on mtv2 sunday night.
Travis just yelled “I’m famous!” and ran outside into oncoming traffic pinching his nipples.
From: “Sally-Anne Farquar”
Subject: cheer up emo kid!
Ewan, Ewan, Ewan!
Don’t be such a sooky-la-la!
I saw yr profile on the makeoutclub.com – such negativity young man! Life is like a box of chocolates, can’t remember that whole quote, but I’m sure that it means that life is damn tasty! Do you like chocolate?
I am a reformed loser and now God has helped me see what a winner I am…his arms were wide open to receive me as His child. I have a child and I wasn’t giving her the loving she deserved – she started throwing herself on the floor of 7-11s around the country…very sad – especially when she lost her slurpee that time…I thought she must have been audtioning for a stunt double for Jackass, but alas – she was just vying for my attention. Very sad situation, but I saw the light – damn it, I left the fuckin’ thing on again! Electricity gets expensive, but nothing to slash yr wrists over, I suppose.
So as you can see, there are alot of people sadder & madder than you out there…oo oo ee ee ee ee eeaaaahhh!!!
Take care & God bless,
Bishop Reverend Sister Farquar esq.
What the fuck just happened?
From: “Jem Godfrey”
Subject: sell me shat
please please can you give me details about buying shat’s “titfuck” and also “finding her clit”
Genius!!!
Thanks, Jem Godfrey
“The Best Of Shat” album out on Buddyhead hits the streets in spring 2002. Try to be patient.
From: ” becca”
Subject: sell me shat
hey buddyhead boys. what’s going on. i know this isn’t really gossip, but i think it’s pretty cool anyway. i’m a freshman at nyu, and one of the RAs in my dorm is the brother of the drummer from Boy Sets Fire. so…yeah. thought that was neat.
bye.
Ask him if his brother introduced him to Creed.
From: VOLUMELANE@aol.com
Subject: (no subject)
Dear Travis:
Please remove my email address from your website in relation to Fuel. It is my personal address and no matter what you think of the band I am just a hired person in the tour and would appreciate a little privacy. If I were needing publicity I would be in a band.
Thank you.
Randy Lane
Sorry dude, but you’re guilty by association.
From: “William Harper”
Subject: hot site
Hey just wanted to say you guys are doing a kick ass job with the site, keep those phone numbers coming its funny as hell calling them up and talking shit. I talked to mandy moore for at least 15 minutes. She thought I was Kurt Loder haha I asked her all about recent releases etc. One more thing In the gossip section it always says that boy sets fire changed there name to boy hits car. I dont know if your just screwing around but im good friends with them and they did not change there name its two diffrent bands. But It is kind of dumb they have two bands with almost exact names on the label. Anyway keep up the good work
Evol one freewill crew
Gullible just got added to the dictionary. We swear!
From: BlackyMcCracker@aol.com
Subject: Man you guys are fuckin pathetic
Dude, i totally agree with a lot of stuff you put up here, but damn if some of it isn’t just fuckin bullshit. You just make shit up to keep interest. it’s fuckin pathetic. You want my name and number so you can call and bash me on this thing, fuck, here it goes:
Parker Brennan
31 Kilarney Lane
Granite City, IL
(618)346-7038
CALL ME, TELL OTHERS TO CALL ME…oh and if you get around to it…make some shit up about me too. that would be cool. thanks.
Fuckin Weak,
Parker Brennan
Call Parker at (618) 346-7038 because he’s a geek with too much free time. How’s that?
From: “Kat”
Subject: hey
Hey, I’m Kat. I was wondering if you guys need any interns. I’m starting to have a lot of free time on my hands and was wondering if you need any help. Thanks, also..real good job on the website.
-Kat
Do you know how to spell? We need people to transcribe interviews and alphabetically organize our office collection of gay porn mags.
From: “rajeev a”
Subject: yo yo
well i guess you guys werent joking around about good old gideon yago. he was wearing a bhead shirt on mtv today. right after he got to interview britney spears, in which he was trying harder not to stare at her boobies than to ask a real question. god bless that dorky bastard. anyway, how the hell did you pull off that coup, and more importantly, i can see why he’s down with the bhead, but how can you or anyone for that matter, be down with him?
yours for the revolution,
rajeev
We’ve got Gideon by the balls with all the stuff we know about that dirty bird. It’s called BLACKMAIL baby.
From: Jim Lerza bigbakedbean@home.com
Subject: reviews
I am interested in seeing what you think of the following albums:
any sunny day real estate album
any simon says album
from zero’s cd “one nation under”
that new band ours
idlewild
cave in
and either of ken andrews’ projects (I don’t care which one, whether it is failure or on)
some of the above I like, some of the above I dislike. You will most likely have some pretty set opinions. I am interested.
What we think of all those records? I guess the easy answer for all of them would be… not as good as Shat.
From: “matt trombley”
Subject: fred durst sux
Alright, first things first, I havent really checked out your site, I don’t know you personally, and I don’t know what you listen to. I also think that your review of Chocolate Starfish and the Hot-Dog flavored Water was right on, if not a little soft. I hate Fred Durst with a passion, but not just because of this album, you’ll find out why in a moment. In the first line of your review, you said “So, until today I’d never been so (un)lucky as to actually listen to a full Limp Bizkit record, start to finish.”. Now I would have to say that is too bad, because Three Dolla Bill Y’all, their first album, is an excellent album excluding that obvious mistake we’ve all come to know and love as Faith. You see, Fred does have it in him, he can make good music. He just chooses not to. After their debut, Durst was criticized by so many people (rightfully so) for not having a great voice. He WWWAAAYYYYYYYYY overcompensated by singing way too much on Significant Other, and even worse this time around. I saw LB in Lewiston, Maine a few months before Three Dolla Bill Y’all came out and I thought they rocked. By the time Significant Other rolled around I felt like the happiest day of my life would not be the birth of my children, or my wedding day, but it would be the day Fred and Limp ate it, Buddy Holly style. So, I think you should listen to all of the debut, especially track 4(“Stuck”), and track 6(“Sour”). Now, as to why I hate Fred Durst so much, it’s not just because he makes horrible music now, it’s because there was a time Fred knew what “Limp Bizkit being a good band” was like, but he really doesn’t remember and that’s too bad. For all of us.
Fred Sux,
Matt Trombley
Matt, we pity you. We’re kinda at a loss for words on this one.
From:
Subject: hola
Who started buddyhead? Students?
No.
From:
Subject: hello
hello iam the 15 yearold boy that has the celebrity project at a club and iam asking to have craig David to chat at my club on november 17th at 3:00 pm pacfic time 6:00pm eastern time if that can be arranged please let me know get back to me ok
thanks Jumah
We have no idea who Craig David is. But if you’d like to book Jeff Wood of Shat call him at (937) 879-5165.
From: Gray
Subject: Juliana Theory impersonators
hello. I, Gray from Myrtle Beach, South Carolina and friend Jared from Jacksonville, Florida decided to prank the world by sending mass emails to juliana theory fans. We sent out about 600 emails from the address “info@thejulianatheory.com” (thanks to sendfakemail.com) acting as brett detar and chad alan of the Juliana Theory saying we would have chat on our instant messenger names which were DetarJuliana and Basstheory1. Somehow the Theory found out and being the ego-stistical maniacs that they are, sent out an email to everyone on their email list telling them of our scam, however we covered it up. We said our guitar tech, Randy, hacked into our email server and sent the message out as a joke (we still have the original email they sent out). More and more people believed we were brett and chad of the juliana theory. Angry fans would come up to them at shows telling them how much of jerks they were. Then it got to Tooth and Nail Records and members of The Stryder (who juliana theory had previously toured with). We had employees instant messenging us. Soon we had a fan instant message us from Australia. The imperonsation domination was of globa