The 2014 NBA Dunk Contest has come and gone and once again the Association has found a creative way to sort of screw up the product. You had three All-Stars participating in this year’s contest: John Wall, Damian Lillard and Paul George. Not “superstars,” granted–none of these guys is a household name to the casual fan, but it’s still a pretty good showing of some of the league’s most talented players. You could have had a straight forward, traditional contest and it would have been successful, but instead the ‘A’ saw fit to give us a bizarre combo of team contest / individual contest where no one outside of the guys participating (maybe?) and the people who made up the rules seemingly during the commercial break right after the 3-point Contest knew what the hell was going on. So by the time John Wall got around to throwing down one of the better dunks anyone’s ever pulled off in the contest, a lot of the television audience had bailed on watching.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJxVMgY3RK8
Here at the BNC, we try not to just be the type of dudes who complain about something without offering a solution. And since the NBA seems hellbent on changing up the Dunk Contest in one way or another every other year or so, we figured we’d offer some ideas on how to actually inject some new life into the product, instead of confusing the hell out of everyone.
5. Raise the Stakes
One of the big reasons why we watch sports at the highest level is because the stakes are high. The reason a lot of folks watch things like the World Cup and the Olympics when ordinarily they wouldn’t be interested? Because it only comes around once every four years, so the stakes are high. One reason why the NFL is an insurmountable powerhouse? There are only 16 games a season, so every game feels like it’s a critical, high-stakes affair. The reason why playoff games and title games are watched more than regular season games? Yeah, you get the ide.
Now I’m not suggesting anything as ridiculous as what MLB has done with their All-Star game, having it determine home field for the World Series. That’s insane. But there has to be greater individual stakes for the participants to make the viewers really feel like this is must-see television. Of course, if you have superstars like Jordan and Dominique (or today’s closest equivalents of Lebron and Blake) going head-to-head then the only necessary stakes you need are bragging rights. Absent that level of star power, however, you need to loop in some sponsors to throw something significant on the table.
A heavy cash prize with a matching charitable contribution? I’ve heard that pitched. It’s a thought, but I’m not sure how well a direct cash prize will go over with fans. But I’m thinking maybe a new custom shoe deal with the winner’s name on it would be a bigger deal. Or maybe the winner gets their own custom jersey. Fans like new shoes and look for any reason to buy a new jersey. Hell, fans would be all over new Limited “Dunk Champion” Edition headphones, or t-shirts, or freaking soda cans. The sponsorship opportunities are plentiful. And players would get a chance to become or expand a brand. Maybe they get to headline a foreign tour to increase their visibility, going from country to country doing exhibitions sponsored by the NBA as the dunk contest champion. Now we’re looking at something a little bit more creative than simply “put up a million dollars to entice the big names to participate.” I mean really, do you think Blake Griffin would trade his current, surely lucrative endorsement deal with Kia, which really took off after he jumped that hood of a car in the dunk contest, for a straight million cash prize? You have to get creative here, NBA.
In terms of the competition itself, if you absolutely must change up the format, how about…
4. Make it a Dunk ON Somebody Contest
There’s an increased risk of injury here, so it would probably never fly. Then again, jumping over a mascot or Shaq sitting on a throne has to have its own level of injury risk as well, so maybe this wouldn’t be so ridiculous after all.
So as not to bruise professional egos, you find some wiry 6’8″ – 6’9″ cat who never made it to the NBA and really has no shot of making it, but is still a solid athlete. Based on the cats I end up inexplicably having to guard whenever I go to the gym, there’s apparently a secret stash of these dudes held in an underground facility somewhere on some Universal Soldier ish. Either that, or they’re all telling the truth when they say they spend 80% of their lives “hoopin’ overseas,” but doesn’t that sound like the kind of unverifiable cover story a top secret lab-created super clone would be implanted with? I mean, right?
Anyway, you bring the least of these dudes out for the first round. Call it the Shawn Bradley Round. If you can’t dunk on this guy something nasty, you don’t deserve to sniff the championship for the contest. Then you trot out someone a little taller or more muscled out, or more athletic; just someone it’ll be that much harder to dunk on. On and on up the line until you get to someone who’s a true challenge to dunk on. Some seven-footer wearing three bandoliers, a World War One gas mask, and a big-ass metal shield shaped like the Wu-Tang ‘W.’ Or, you know, just a really tall defender. Whatever works.
The point being, it’s always more fun to see someone get dunked on than to just see a wide open dunk. And, of course, bonus points for getting creative while dunking on someone. If you throw it off the backboard and catch a reverse on some hapless defender’s head, everyone in the building will be on their feet. Alternatively…
3. Make it Part of an Actual Game
To a certain extent, YouTube has permanently spoiled the dunk contest. If I want to see an incredible dunk contest style dunk, I can go online and watch a bunch of videos of Team Flight Brothers or any number of similar groups performing all sorts of insane dunks that haven’t been performed before by an NBA player in any capacity. On top of that, at a certain point, you’ve seen almost every dunk contest style dunk there can be, and slight variations here and there are only going to elicit so much excitement from fans.
And yet, seeing explosive, emphatic dunks during an actual game never ever, ever gets old. Ever. It’s like the difference between how funny a joke has to be if someone sets it up as, “Okay, I’m about to tell you a really great joke and you’re going to laugh your head off,” versus how funny it has to be if it’s just an off-the-cuff witty comment. Expectation is everything. If you’re expecting to be wowed, the bar is set so much higher than if someone can catch you a bit off guard.
If you incorporate the dunk contest into some sort of actual game format–a quick game, maybe one 8-minute quarter and that’s it–you have a greater possibility of catching people by surprise when someone rises up with a 360 between the legs on a fast break. Sure there would still be a level of expectation, but it would feel a lot more like anticipation, which is always more fun. And it’s not like there’s a shortage of fantastic dunks during the All-Star Game itself, so you already have proof that this is feasible. You bring in 6 contestants and fill out the rest of the roster with one lob-throwing-genius of a point guard on each team, and one big man who’s unafraid to stand his ground in the paint and maybe get yammed on. Again, there’s higher potential for injury here, so perhaps this scenario isn’t practical, but hell, it’s still twice as good as a three-on-three dunk off where no one’s really going head-to-head.
On to the next one…
2. Make it Team Flight or Other YouTube Sensations vs. NBA Players
I’m admittedly sort of stealing this one from Mark Schlereth, who I heard mention this the other day on his radio show. Actually, I think he suggested having the NBA players judge while the non-pros dunked it off (which sounds vaguely filthy, I apologize), but I think it would be more entertaining and competitive to see NBA stars vs. YouTube guys. It ties back into raising the stakes: NBA players would have a hell of a lot to play for, as none of them would want to be shown up by some guy who isn’t even in the Association, and the non-pros would be playing for a shot at some fame, for pride and probably with a chip on their shoulder. Sure, being a great dunker alone doesn’t mean you belong in the pros, but an athlete’s ego isn’t really built for logic like that when they’re in the heat of competition. In that moment, a guy who never made it to the pros is going to be thinking, “This is my chance to prove I’m better than some of these dudes I’m going against.” Nevermind that it’s only proving he’s better at one relatively insignificant element of the game, it’s something. That’s going to be his motivation, and the fans will be able to feed off of that.
And the last idea is to simply…
1. Skip a Year or Two Between Contests
I mentioned before how important the Olympics and World Cup feel to the average spectator, and to the athletes too, for that matter, based in large part on the fact that they only come around once every four years. If the NBA only held the Dunk Contest once every two or three years, the anticipation for its return would build so much that even in an off year, it will still feel like a must-see event. For players like Lebron, Blake and Durant, there’d be greater incentive to participate, because you’d only have so many opportunities in your prime to compete.
Now if you combine this with something like the shoe deal or the custom jersey, or some other sponsorship or exclusive rights, you could make the contest something really big. Imagine if a guy got go around for two or three years saying he’s the league’s best dunker; his custom shoes and jersey flying off the rack; his exclusive, sponsored tours through Asia and Europe and so on–showing off his contest-winning dunks–raising his profile worldwide; his “Angry Birds: Dunking With John Wall” game selling like crazy in app stores. Tell me that guy isn’t going to want to defend his title when the contest comes around again. Tell me he won’t face fierce competition from other players who will be hungry for that level of attention and stardom. The fact that they’d have to wait an extra year or two for their next chance would only make everyone–potential participant and spectator–more eager for the next contest to show up. The ratings would potentially spike, you’d be able to charge more for ads, and instead of the annual “Does the dunk contest even need to exist?” conversation, you might have people instead saying, “Damn, I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen when the dunk contest comes back around.”
So, you know, if anyone reading this has the ear of Commissioner Silver, feel free to pass this along to him, and let him know I’d be happy to take on the job of Dunk Contest Savior Genius Guy if the position is open.