Sunderland's win at Old Trafford meant that Fulham and Cardiff were relegated after losses at Stoke and Newcastle. Aston Villa and Southampton also won, while Bristol Rovers lost their Football League status
5.16pm BST
Thanks for joining me for this marathon clockwatch, brought to you by Unbranded Energy Drink. On a day of drama, on and off the pitch, I'll leave the last word to Fulham and Cardiff. Both teams saw trouble ahead; both hit the panic button and replaced their manager (Fulham did it twice), but the end result was the same.
Cardiff will wonder what might have been, had Malky Mackay not been so brusquely shoved through the exit door; Fulham may conclude that not even a Sir Alex/Valeriy Lobanovksyi double act could have saved their squad. Both will play in the Championship next season. Here's a Euro 96 style send off to play us out. Thanks for reading, and for all your e-mails. Goodbye.
5.08pm BST
In League One, the playoffs look like this:
Peterborough v Leyton Orient
5.04pm BST
Plenty of thoughtful responses from members of the esteemed Toon Army - here's my pick from John Davis:
I agree that Newcastle fans seem churlish to complain at ninth, but those points were all taken pre-January. The frustration and worry is about next season now - we have lost our best player with no replacement plan despite much warning, our only goalscorer is on loan and won't return next season and our most creative player is being ostracised. Never mind not winning trophies - there is zero ambition being shown even to try in those competitions. Our team is far worse than at the start of the season. Relegation is a real worry next year and I can't see the desire from the club to strengthen or have any ambition beyond survival.
5.03pm BST
Here's the full Premier League table. Cardiff and Fulham, look away now.
5.00pm BST
But congratulations to Dundee, who return to the Scottish Premiership. Hamilton beat Morton 10-2 - but it was all for naught, as Dundee beat Dumbarton 2-1.
Meanwhile, in League One, it's Tranmere and Carlisle who go down, as Crewe and Notts County survive. Finally, bravo to Chesterfield, who hung on against Fleetwood to win 2-1 and secure the League Two title.
4.57pm BST
Aston Villa 3-1 Hull City
Man United 0-1 Sunderland
4.55pm BST
Rovers lose at home to Mansfield, while wins for Wycombe and Northampton condemn them to the drop.
4.54pm BST
It's finished Newcastle 3-0 Cardiff and Stoke 4-1 Fulham.
4.52pm BST
You know what that means...
4.52pm BST
Steven Taylor wraps it up, and then the whistle goes.
4.50pm BST
Something happens at Swansea - and that something is a comedy lobbed assist from Ashley Williams. He beats his own keeper with a lovely chip, and Rickie Lambert bundles the ball in. They kept us waiting, but it was worth it.
4.48pm BST
Less than two minutes for United to equalise, otherwise Fulham and Cardiff are down. Meanwhile, it's Hamilton 10-2 Morton. The Accies have overturned an eight goal deficit - if Dundee concede an equaliser to Dumbarton, Hamilton will go up on goals scored. Madness.
4.47pm BST
Loic Remy scores perhaps the least celebrated goal of the entire season. I'll stick my neck out and say Cardiff are going down.
4.46pm BST
Good grief - the ball is skittering around the Mansfield area, but nobody in a Rovers shirt can force it in! Where's Jimmy Glass when you need him?
4.44pm BST
The spotlight will swing back to the title race at 5.30pm sharp today, as Everton host Manchester City. City need a win to keep the title's destiny in their own hands. You can follow the whole thing with Michael Butler here.
4.41pm BST
Here's Joe Hamlen with some perspective:
As a Bristol Rovers fan, I find it very hard to feel sorry for Newcastle fans starved of trophies and 9th in the Premier League.
Is the Swansea-Saints game really dull then?
4.39pm BST
A lovely slide pass from Charlie Adam tees up substitute Jon Walters, and Fulham's dismantling is complete.
4.38pm BST
A cross is half-cleared and lands at the feet of Richardson, who scores a goal that, understandably, does not cause pandemonium in the away dugout.
4.36pm BST
Here's Ray Ward on that walkout:
As a lifelong Palace fan, I have never been more appalled at the short term memories of the spoiled brats who support the bulk of the Premier League teams. The widespread grumbling in the stands (in place of the usual graveyard silence) is the best most of them can offer. Walking out on your own team is about as low as it goes though. Stay and protest the ownership, but don't quit on the players.
4.34pm BST
In League One, it's Notts County's turn to clamber clear of the drop - an Alan Sheehan penalty has left Tranmere firmly in the mire.
4.33pm BST
At Old Trafford, a post is struck - but it's the visitors who go close, as Emmanuel Giaccherini strikes the woodwork. Shortly after, a low Danny Welbeck cross is flicked wide by RVP.
Here's Simon McMahon with a Scottish update:
Squeaky bum time at Dens where it's now Dundee 2-1 Dumbarton, with Hamilton leading Morton 7-1!
4.31pm BST
Mark Hughes' Stoke put the boot into his former employees - Assaidi wraps up the win, and Fulham are staring Championship football full in the face.
4.30pm BST
A few thousand Geordies get to their feet and stomp towards the exits - although it sounds like the majority of fans are sticking around. Alan Pardew must rue the last time Cardiff were here - in the Cup, when the mid-table hosts lost 2-1 to a freefalling Cardiff team. That may have been the last straw for a support starved of trophies.
4.26pm BST
It's Crewe 2-0 Preston in League One, which looks to have done from Tranmere - but what's this? It's Oldham 1-0 Notts County - which means that County, who started in 19th, are below the dreaded red line. Meanwhile, in League Two, Bristol Rovers hit the bar!
4.24pm BST
Robin van Persie is on for Manchester United. A goal for United would keep Fulham and Cardiff in the Premier League on a technicality - they'll need to score twice to make it interesting. And to win, which is sort of the main thing for them.
4.22pm BST
There's not a lot happening in the top flight, so here's a nice picture of some happy people at Villa Park:
4.20pm BST
More shenanigans at Newcastle - on the hour, several fans have upped and left, ahead of the planned walkout in the 69th minute. The walkout was scheduled for 60 minutes, but changed to reflect the date of Newcastle's last trophy - 1969. A few hundred fans didn't get the memo. What a farcical situation this is.
4.18pm BST
It's curtains for Carlisle - they're 3-0 down at Wolves and heading for League Two. Tranmere sit in the other undecided relegation spot, despite leading Bradford 1-0. That's because Crewe still lead at home to Preston.
4.17pm BST
Not much happening on the field at St. James' Park - but in the stands, there's widespread acrimony. The removal of clocks at the stadium appears to be a myth, but the stewards are trying to remove some less than complimentary banners - but the fans are having none of it. One of these teams might be relegated today - and it's not Newcastle.
4.14pm BST
Chesterfield are in pole position in League Two - they've fought back to lead Fleetwood 2-1. At Stoke, Mitroglou is on at almost the exact point that survival has become beyong Fulham. It's Stoke who threaten again, Assaidi going close this time.
4.13pm BST
In League Two, it's Northampton 3-1 Oxford, while Torquay are down to ten men. It looks like Bristol Rovers will need a goal to stay in the Football League after 94 years.
4.12pm BST
Fulham are in deep, deep filth now. Marco Arnautovic's excellent finish means that Fulham, amusingly, need a United equaliser to survive beyond today. Even then, it would only be mathematically possible.
4.10pm BST
Here's an agreeably colloquial rebuke of my earlier Newcastle comments...
4.06pm BST
N'Zonzi hoofs over early for Stoke, as the hosts continue on the front foot. Sunderland still lead at Old Trafford, as the footballing world reels with the news that beating Norwich at home wasn't perhaps the bright new dawn we had all assumed.
4.05pm BST
Further thoughts on what may await Bristol Rovers or Wycombe after the final whistle today. I have nothing scientific to back this up, but the Conference does appear to be a nightmare to get out of...
4.00pm BST
This, from Henry Millward on the difference between League Two and the Conference, is very interesting:
Re John Fenton's message (3.27) about League Two relegation: it is a good point and one which Jez George, the director of football of my club, Cambridge United, has spoken about a number of times this season.
One of the reasons he's particularly frustrated is not simply the nomenclature, but the discrepancies in funding for youth set-ups between clubs which are in the FL and those in non-league. Even those non-league clubs who meet the criteria are not permitted to receive the benefits, which means that the result of one game, the Conference play-off final for example, can have a significant bearing on the youth schemes of clubs.
3.58pm BST
Here's Matt Dony on Cardiff, for whom the jig looks up:
Cardiff do tend to look better on paper, and they have been unfortunate in some games. They do deserve to go down, though, if only for the crazy Odenwingie/Jones swap deal.
Newcastle appear to have taken away the LED clocks to try and stop the 69th minute walkout...That's an impressive level of pettiness.
3.53pm BST
It's MK Dons 0-2 Leyton Orient, with the O's looking good to finish third in League One. Meanwhile, here's the futile effort of the day: it's Hamilton 5-1 Morton - but Dundee are 2-0 up in the race for promotion to the Scottish Premiership. More of your e-mails in a second, before the final 45 minutes of CRUNCH TIME.
3.50pm BST
Aston Villa 3-1 Hull City
Man United 0-1 Sunderland
3.48pm BST
Villa are saving themselves in style - Jordan Bowery redeems himself with a whipped cross to Weimann, who gets his second with a firm header.
3.46pm BST
Seven-figure signing Konstantinos Mitroglou is still sitting on the Fulham bench. Surely it's worth chucking him on at some stage?
Meanwhile, in League Two, it's Scunthorpe 2-1 York, Newport 1-1 Rochdale and Torquay 0-2 Wycombe. In Scotland, Celtic lead Aberdeen 2-1, care of Scott Brown.
3.42pm BST
It's going the way of the teams above the line so far. Andreas Weimann puts Aston Villa back into the lead! From a corner, Nathan Baker and Nikica Jelavic engage in a bit of comical head tennis, nodding the ball between them via the bar before Weimann puts an end to the nonsense, heading home from three yards.
3.40pm BST
There may well be no great escape this time for Fulham, who have survived and often thrived in the top division since 2001. Stoke have taken the lead - Peter Odemwingie following in after a Stephen Ireland shot is deflected.
3.39pm BST
Not anymore, it's not. It's Bristol Rovers 0-1 Mansfield. They're level on points with Wycombe, but with a goal difference of -11. Wycombe's is -10. A chasm.
Here's Simon McMahon, with an update from Scotland:
Afternoon Niall. In Scotland, Hibs misery shows no sign of letting up, as they trail 1-0 at home to Partick Thistle. Both those sides, and Ross County, St. Mirren and Kilmarnock could still end up in the relegation play-off. In the Championship Hamilton lead Morton 2-0, putting early pressure on Dundee, who they could still pip to the title if the Dens Park men bottle it again and lose at home to Dumbarton.
3.36pm BST
Tables a-turning in League Two; Northampton have scored twice in quick succession to lead Oxford 2-1. Oxford have also had goalscorer Ryan Williams sent off. Not good. As it stands, Wycombe will go down, unless Bristol Rovers lose at home to Mansfield. It's 0-0 there.
3.34pm BST
Debuchy with a big challenge to stop Wilfried Zaha in his tracks at St. James' Park. That Sunderland goal looks to have sparked a Cardiff surge - and at the Britannia, Felix Magath is making changes; he brings on Dejagah in place of Lewis Holtby.
3.32pm BST
Sunderland's survival sprint continues - and the David Moyes factor returns to Old Trafford. Seb Larsson has the freedom of the penalty area, and finishes with minimum fuss. That goal could do for Fulham and Cardiff.
3.29pm BST
Oh, Villa. This is the double whammy - an own goal with a hint of offside, as Liam Rosenior, who looked ahead of the last defender, sees his cross deflected in off of Jordan Bowery, who had just come on for the injured Gabby Agbonlahor.
3.27pm BST
John Fenton has a pertinent question re: League Two relegation.
Why the importance? Is there really that big a difference in the way that League and Conference teams are permitted to do business, retain players, etc?
3.24pm BST
Sissoko smacks the post for Newcastle with a decent effort, as Cardiff threaten to exit the division with a whimper. A draw for Sunderland wouldn't send them down mathematically, but they'd need to beat Chelsea 12-0 on the last day, and hope other results go their way.
3.22pm BST
There's a couple of mad trophy tussles going on today - in League Two, Chesterfield, Rochdale and Scunthorpe can all get their grubby mitts on the silverware today. As it stands, Scunthorpe lead York 1-0, Rochdale are level with Newport, and Chesterfield are behind at home to Fleetwood - 1-0 the score. At present, Scunthorpe are top - maybe don't book the open-top bus yet, mind you.
3.19pm BST
Shola Ameobi gets another chance - and this time David Marshall can't do a thing, as the striker powers a header in at the far post. As things stand, Cardiff, like Aerosmith, are going down.
3.17pm BST
Some lovely stuff from Newcastle down the right hand side leads to Debuchy firing at Cardiff's David Marshall - and from the corner, Marshall is at it again, saving brilliantly from a point blank Ameobi header. He really should have made the PFA team of the season, shouldn't he?
3.15pm BST
Newcastle apply some pressure, with Remy firing wide after a one-two with Gouffran. They're being coerced into action by a grumbling home crowd. Newcastle's fans - discuss. I can't decide if their continued ire and high expectations is exactly what a coasting mid-table side needs, or whether they should pipe down a bit.
3.12pm BST
Developments at the foot of League One - Tranmere, in the fourth and final relegation place, lead Bradford 1-0, while Carlisle, in 22nd and facing an uphill task at Molineux, are a goal down. As it stands, it's Carlisle and Crewe who will go down.
Update: Crewe lead at home to playoff bound Preston - so Tranmere are in the bottom four again. Think it's safe to say that isn't set in stone.
3.10pm BST
One could argue, if one were so inclined that there's no relegation battle more important than the one in League Two, where Wycombe are fighting for their league status. They've taken the lead at already doomed Torquay - and Northampton are behind at home to Oxford. So as it stands, Northampton are 91st in the football pyramid, and heading for the Conference. Early days, mind you.
3.08pm BST
Big chance for Cardiff! Newcastle's fans are apparently planning a walkout in the 69th minute today - but this could have hastened their departure. With Krul messing up his punched clearance, Frazier Campbell has an open net to aim at - but his angled shot, taken early, goes just wide!
3.05pm BST
Villa had looked set for a long, drawn-out afternoon - but Ashley Westwood arrows a shot into the bottom corner after just 56 seconds to release the pressure at Villa Park! A win for Villa would see them safe, barring an extraordinary turn of events.
Another side quick off the blocks are League One's Rotherham - they lead 1-0 at Swindon, and could finish third in the table.
3.02pm BST
That didn't take long...
3.01pm BST
Big old afternoon coming up...
2.59pm BST
It's finished West Ham 2-0 Spurs - that means West Ham are up to 12th, past the magic forty point milestone and safe for another season. No wonder the Upton Park faithful are so happy with everything. Spurs' defeat means, by my reckoning, that Everton are pretty much assured of at least a Europa League spot. Three more wins for Manchester United would also likely carry them into the top six, care of Spurs' dreadful goal difference (it's plus one).
2.49pm BST
We leave the Championship with what can only be described as scenes - direct from the Birmingham dressing room.
2.48pm BST
Returning to the Championship briefly, here's Bruce Cooper of Toronto on the playoff picture:
I am rooting for Derby County because they have the best non premier league logo. Go Rams!
2.42pm BST
No Rickie Lambert in the Saints' starting line-up; a spot of knack means he drops to the bench. It's a good thing England have such exceptional strength in depth, or the mounting injuries might be giving Roy some sleepless nights.
Swansea: Vorm, Tiendalli, Amat, Williams, Ben Davies, Britton,
Shelvey, de Guzman, Hernandez, Routledge, Bony.
2.36pm BST
Robin van Persie is on the bench for United as he returns from injury. Ryan Giggs' front six looks, well, experimental, to say the least.
2.33pm BST
Alan Pardew goes with two up front, while Ole Gunnar Solskjaer starts with just Frazier Campbell up top, supported by Zaha, Kim and Mutch in a creative looking midfield (although Cardiff's team always looks reasonable on paper, I find).
2.29pm BST
Before I remove my ramshackle yet entertaining Championship hat, and slip on a gaudy, overpriced Premier League fedora, here's a link to the final Championship table.
Incidentally, the playoff semi-finals, played over two legs will be Brighton v Derby County and Wigan v QPR.
2.18pm BST
I'm going for a quick dose of smelling salts, then it's over to the Premiership, and indeed Leagues 1 & 2, to see if they can match that ludicrous drama.
It remains West Ham 2-0 Spurs - Michael Butler has you covered for that.
2.16pm BST
Barnsley 2-3 QPR
Blackburn 4-3 Wigan
Blackpool 0-3 Charlton
Bolton 2-2 Birmingham
Ipswich 2-1 Sheff Wed
Leeds 1-1 Derby
Leicester 1-0 Doncaster
Millwall 1-0 Bournemouth
Nottm Forest 1-2 Brighton
Reading 2-2 Burnley
Watford 1-4 Huddersfield
Yeovil 1-4 Middlesbrough
2.15pm BST
What an absurd game this is at times. Heading for injury time, Reading were in the playoffs, and Birmingham were down. Late goals for Leo Ulloa and Paul Caddis changed all that. At Reading, there's a very strange, slow pitch invasion, as fans ready to celebrate don't know what else to do. Brighton make the playoffs, and Birmingham, 2-0 down late in the game, survive.
2.12pm BST
It's finished Leicester 1-0 Doncaster and Bolton 2-2 Birmingham.
2.11pm BST
It finishes Forest 1-2 Brighton - Leo Ulloa's late header is enough to lift the Seagulls into sixth place. They join Derby, QPR and Wigan in the playoffs.
2.10pm BST
Reading's playoff party had the life brutally sucked out of with about thirty seconds to go. There's now a sort of resigned silence. They wait in hope for a Forest equaliser.
2.08pm BST
Football. Birmingham were down ten minutes ago - but after the mother of all goalmouth melees, Paul Caddid nods in. As it stands, despite all logic to the contrary, Birmingham are staying up!
2.07pm BST
Good lord. They've left it late - but Brighton have snatched the final playoff place. Craig Mackail-Smith belts in a brilliant cross from the left, and Leo Ulloa is there to nod in. It's utter, utter pandemonium in the away end.
2.05pm BST
What a save from de Vries! Brighton's Calderon steered a volley towards the top corner, but the Dutchman makes a terrific one handed stop. Brighton keep pressing...
2.04pm BST
Two hat-tricks to report - Danny Ward has got his third for Huddersfield to make it 4-0, while Callum Harriott scores again for Charlton at a bewildered Bloomfield Road.
2.03pm BST
Into the dying moments. After a topsy, and indeed, turvy afternoon, we're back to where we started - Reading sit sixth, while Birmingham are bound for the drop. It could all still change, however. Or it might not.
2.01pm BST
So close for Brighton! Solly March picks out Will Buckley, and the midfielder tries to skip around the goalkeeper, but is thwarted at the last. That's Buckley's last contribution - he's replaced by Craig Mackail-Smith. It's Blackburn 4-3 Wigan - quite the game in East Lancashire.
1.57pm BST
Jordan Rhodes has made it Blackburn 4-2 Wigan - they won't squeeze into the playoffs this season, but there are some welcome good vibes at Ewood Park once more. As things stand, Reading sit sixth - Brighton are looking for a winner, but in oddly casual fashion at present.
1.55pm BST
Birmingham are pressing again, with Hancox the latest to pass up a chance. The Blues, who won the League Cup three years ago, have ten minutes to save themselves. Blackpool have gone two down at home to Charlton - Callum Harriott with his second - but the Seasiders look like they'll stumble over the line.
1.53pm BST
Or not. Birmingham respond immediately, Nicola Zigic with, would you believe, a header to halve the deficit. This is breathless stuff.
1.51pm BST
Ah. Sorry, Birmingham. Lukas Jutkiewicz has doubled Bolton's lead, and the Blues are surely doomed now.
1.50pm BST
Well, then. Doncaster's resistance is broken as they concede a dubious looking penalty. Dave Nugent converts, and Doncaster's Championship survival is hanging by a thread. A goal for Birmingham would send them down. Eek.
1.48pm BST
Burnley keep pressing against Reading, showing admirable tenacity when there's really not much in this game for them. There's plenty at stake for poor old Birmingham, who are relentlessly pinging the ball into the Bolton box, to no avail.
1.46pm BST
Staying in Leicester, David Nugent spurns a presentable chance to put Leicester ahead. In places other than Leicester, it's Barnsley 1-3 QPR, Ipswich 2-1 Sheff Weds and Watford 0-3 Huddersfield.
1.43pm BST
Also at Leicester, Kevin Phillips has just been substituted - bringing down the final curtain on the 40-year-old's illustrious career. Phillips won the European Golden Shoe in 1999-2000, and was perhaps unlucky to only amass 8 England caps after a long, successful career across the top two domestic divisions. Here's some of his highlights.
1.40pm BST
On the sun-kissed Lancashire coast, it's Blackpool 0-1 Charlton. Blackpool are still in danger, although both Doncaster and Birmingham need to win their games to send them down. At the King Power stadium, Leicester fans are chanting in praise of Rovers manager (and former Foxes player) Paul Dickov. Leicester will finish on 100 points, and Doncaster will stay up as things stand. Everybody's happy.
1.37pm BST
1.36pm BST
Reading snatch sixth place back - and if that's the goal that secures a playoff spot, it's deserving of the title. Garath McCleary (yes, Garath) controls the ball on the edge of the area before dispatching a glorious half-volley into the Burnley net. Meanwhile at Ewood Park, it's Blackburn 3-2 Wigan. Things haven't really gone Blackburn's way this half, it's fair to say.
1.33pm BST
Ouch. This could be the goal that condemns Birmingham to the third tier of English football. It's Lee Chung-Yong with an angled finish after the visitors fail to clear. And it's not the only big goal to rattle the net in recent moments...
1.31pm BST
More goals in the division that keeps on giving - it's Leeds 1-1 Derby, Ipswich 1-1 Sheff Weds and Watford 0-2 Huddersfield.
At Upton Park, it's West Ham 2-0 Spurs - who else but Stewart Downing, who drills a free kick through a frankly abysmal Tottenham wall.
1.29pm BST
They've been pretty poor all game, but Brighton have equalised at the City Ground! It's full back Stephen Ward who takes a touch after the ball cannons around the Forest area, before finishing smartly, low into the far corner. As it stands, Brighton are in the playoffs.
1.25pm BST
Only a replacement bus service can spoil Boro's day out - it's now Yeovil 1-4 Boro, Ledesma with his second goal. It's also Watford 0-1 Huddersfield - the Terriers' Joe Lolley with a sweet, cool finish.
1.23pm BST
We're back underway in the Championship games. Here's m'colleague Dan Lucas on that tricky Boro-Yeovil trip.
The quickest way is to hop on the train over to York and get down to Kings Cross, then take the Northern Line down to Waterloo and get a train out to Yeovil from there. Alternatively you can go to Darlington and get the train straight down to Bristol, whence it's an easy hop over to Yeovil. Either way, you're looking at around seven hours on the train each way and £155 for the pleasure of making the journey.
1.21pm BST
Goal at Upton Park - it's Big Sam's West Ham who take the lead, courtesy of an Andy Carroll header which buffets off Harry Kane and into the net. It looks like Carroll's effort was a smidge off target - so it's going down as an own goal, to nobody's satisfaction.
That goal came just moments after Spurs' centre back Younes Kaboul was red carded for a professional foul. Not the best first half for Tactics Tim (who I'll confess to feeling a little bit sorry for this week). Join Michael Butler for the latest.
1.14pm BST
Apols for the late appearance of the half-time scores - some gremlins in the works there. Ghosts in the machine.
As things stand, Birmingham will drop into the third tier - but defeat for Doncaster at Leicester would mean the point they currently hold would be enough. In the playoff chase, Reading sit sixth despite finding themselves 2-1 down at home to Burnley. A four-goal swing to Blackburn in the second half could see Rovers sneak in against the odds.
1.11pm BST
Barnsley 0-2 QPR
Blackburn 3-1 Wigan
Blackpool 0-0 Charlton
Bolton 0-0 Birmingham
Ipswich 1-0 Sheff Wed
Leeds 0-1 Derby
Leicester 0-0 Doncaster
Millwall 1-0 Bournemouth
Nottm Forest 1-0 Brighton
Reading 1-2 Burnley
Watford 0-0 Huddersfield
Yeovil 1-3 Middlesbrough
1.04pm BST
Two quickfire goals for playoff-bound QPR - Charlie Austin and a Mvoto OG have made it Barnsley 0-2 QPR. At the Madejski, Burnley, who have looked a class above today, pass up another half-chance, Ings lifting the ball over the bar. Sean Dyche's team can certainly make an impact in the top flight on this evidence. Oh, and it's Yeovil 1-3 Boro. Seems like the trip was worth it for Boro fans, although I can't conceive how on earth you'd get from Middlesbrough to Yeovil on public transport, so I can't be sure.
12.59pm BST
At the City Ground, Brighton centre-back Gordon Greer is picked out from a corner - but his header is all out of goose, flying wide of the post. Others have been less wasteful around the Championship - Tommy Smith has given Ipswich the lead at home to Sheffield Wednesday, while at Huish Park, it's now Yeovil 1-2 Middlesbrough.
12.57pm BST
There is, lest we forget, a Premier League game underway. It's a rare old Lah'n derby between West Ham and Spurs - and it's 0-0 early on. You can join Michael Butler for live MBM coverage of that one.
12.55pm BST
A heady whiff of controversy around this one - the rangy Nicola Zigic nods home, but is adjudged to have fouled Matthew Mills, who crumpled rather conveniently. At the Madejski, Burnley continue to press as Reading look rather forlorn. Further net busting action from the visitors would, however, play into their bitter rivals Blackburn's hands.
12.52pm BST
Hmm. Other results thus far mean that Blackburn can sneak in - and they now need just a four goal swing to do so (I know it's still quite a lot, but it was seven before kick-off). Rudy Gestede's second of the day keeps it interesting at Ewood Park.
12.50pm BST
1300 Middlesbrough fans have ventured to deepest Somerset for a game that means absolutely zilch - they've been rewarded with a Danny Graham goal to put the Boro 1-0 up. Birmingham continue knocking on the door at the Reebok Stadium, but can't make the breakthrough.
12.48pm BST
Millwall look set fair for safety, with Martyn Woolford giving them the lead with a glancing header. Elsewhere at the bottom of the table, it's still goalless between Leicester and Doncaster, and at Bolton, the visitors have done most of the legwork, but it's still 0-0. Birmingham could escape with a draw, of course.
12.45pm BST
Yeesh. Does anyone want this final playoff spot? Danny Ings gets his 21st league goal of the season with a neat, angled finish. At the City Ground, Leo Ulloa (pronounched 'uchoa', for what it's worth) nets, but he's offside.
12.42pm BST
Matt Derbyshire puts the hosts in front, but it's poor old Tommy Kuszczak who takes the blame! From a left-wing cross, the striker's header was tame and central - but the Polish keeper stumbles and juggles the ball clownishly, before spilling it into the net. Brighton are now down in eighth, with Wigan and Reading occupying the playoff spots.
12.38pm BST
That's a shame. Reading started with admirable gusto, but once they took the lead, they removed their foot from the accelerator, and Burnley level immediately. Scott Arfield nods in with the defenders caught dreaming of their playoff game with QPR.
12.36pm BST
Double trouble at Ewood Park - Wigan equalise through an Ivan Ramis header, but pretty much straight from the kick-off, Rudy Gestede puts the hosts back in front with a tidy near-post finish. Wigan drop to sixth - but only for a matter of seconds...
12.34pm BST
Reading will seal a playoff place with a win - and they've taken the lead from a ferocious counter attack. Jobi McAnuff sprints down the right after a Burnley corner, of all things, and drills in a cross towards Pobgrebnyak. Kieran Trippier has to stretch to intercept - but succeeds only in flicking the ball into his own net. Oh dear.
12.32pm BST
Oof - chance for the hosts at the City Ground, with Marcus Tudgay put through on goal. He tries to be clever, aiming to loft the ball over Thomas Kuszczak. He makes an awful hash of it, the ball spinning wide of the target.
12.30pm BST
Blackburn need to hammer Wigan and hope for the best today - and they've made a fine start! Tom Cairney slaloms through the visiting defence, before flicking the ball in off the near post. It's Blackburn 1-0 Wigan. Wigan are guaranteed a play-off place, but could now fall to sixth if Reading can beat Burnley. The Royals are currently trying their best, McCleary in particular looking lively.
12.27pm BST
Early goal at Elland Road - Simon Dawkins bundles the ball in for Derby to make it 1-0 to the visitors. Derby are safely ensconced in third, but will secure a club-record points tally with a draw.
12.20pm BST
Drama in Berkshire already - a Pavel Pobregnyak shot is blocked by Jason Shackell, and the home players appeal furiously for a penalty! It's not given. From the rebound, McCleary hoofs over.
12.17pm BST
It's the football pyramid's second tier which provides today's first slice of crunch. There are 12 fixtures in all - many are, without wanting to be rude, basically meaningless. That's not the case at the Madejski, or indeed the City Ground. Reading host Promised Land bound Burnley needing a win to secure the final playoff spot, alongside Derby, QPR and Wigan. Should they slip up, Brighton can make off with their spot - providing they can better the Royal's result at Nottingham Forest. Blackburn are also in with an admittedly faint shout - if they win, the others lose, and they conjure a seven goal swing by thrashing Wigan, they can still clamber in.
Barnsley and Yeovil are down, but there's still one place to fill in the pod before it's jettisoned into the netherworld of League 1. Lee Clark's Birmingham, winners of a mighty TWO home league games thus far, are in the hot seat - but a draw at Bolton could haul them clear, if Doncaster lose at Leicester. The Foxes, incidentally, can break the 100 point barrier with a draw. If Rovers can thwart them, and Birmingham win, there's still room in the pod for Millwall (at home to Bournemouth) or even Blackpool, who host Charlton.
12.11pm BST
Good afternoon and welcome to your super soaraway Saturday clockwatch. Today marks the penultimate game for most of the top-flight sides in action. It could also be the day that Fulham's thirteen season shift in the Premier League comes to an end; Cardiff's less impressive one season run is also at risk.
Both teams have struggled valiantly to put a survival run together, and will continue the fitful fight at Stoke and Newcastle respectively this afternoon. Fail to win, and they'll have to hope that plucky Man United can hold Sunderland to a draw at Old Trafford, or they're toast. The resurgent Black Cats still have home games to come against West Brom and Swansea - realistically, it's win or bust for Messrs Magath and Solskjaer.
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