It’s terse answer Thursday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…
1. Asking for a week off when company asks to extend my contract
I started my job 4.5 months ago. At that time, I was told I would work for a 6-month trial period, after which my contract would either terminate or be extended to one year. After one month of working, I was told my trial period would be shortened to 3 months. Then, I was told my contract would end, but after 4 months of work (due to a lack of business, not because of my performance).
During my 4th month of work, my mother-in-law booked a family vacation for the second month of July, thinking that I would be unemployed at that time. The week before my four months were up, I was asked to work for one more month. Now, it’s possible that I’ll be asked to work an additional month at the last minute again, but I have this week-long vacation already paid for next month. I have asked my bosses about the possibility of working next month, but they have not committed to anything.
Would it be appropriate to request this week off if I’m asked to stay on for another month? I’m hesitant to ask because I will have only been working for this company for five months by that time, and I’ve been advised to not ask for vacation time until I’ve been working for a year. (However, I am technically allotted 15 days of PTO per year.) I also have already asked for a day off here and there to attend interviews for other, more stable jobs. I don’t want to lose favor with my bosses because the job market in my field is absolutely terrible right now and obviously I’d like to avoid becoming unemployed. However, I had been told definitely that I wouldn’t be working for them at the time my mother-in-law made our vacation plans, so I feel like it could be fair to ask for this time off in light of that. What do you think?
You can absolutely say, “I’d love to work the additional month, but when I thought my contract would be ending on DATE, I booked a trip for one week in July. Would it be possible for me to take that week off while working the rest of the month?” No reasonable person is going to have an issue with that. They might tell you that they can’t approve the time (at which point you’d need to decide whether you want the trip or the extra month of work more), but they shouldn’t have a problem with you asking.
2. Can we do anything about our awful company?
I’m currently employed at a company that has a history of casuistic activities when it comes to their dealings with employees. I was recently copied on an email where a former employee was sent a request from our CEO, requesting they give back a necklace purchased for them earlier this year. The CEO was clearly careful not to use the word “gift” in the communication, though what would you really call a necklace being given to another person if not a gift? Similarly, we often have employees who after calling in sick will be requested to resign due to their “possible” health issues (our executive team wants to see employees in the office, even if they have a cold and may infect others). We have had eight employees come and go within the last six months — our total company is less than 40 employees. In addition, former employees who have left are often talked down about in passing by the senior members as people who “couldn’t cut it” or were “dead weight.” Besides this, employee bonuses are often reevaluated each month so that the company does not have to compensate for them; for example, a goal may be set to accomplish a certain amount of sales within a given month, yet midway through, if it looks like the target may be hit, a new higher goal will be set and the bonuses go unpaid.
Is there anything we employees can do besides quit?
No. Changing this type of thing has to come from the top.
Your company sucks and isn’t going to change. I’m sorry.
3. Coworkers aren’t happy that I’ve been promoted
I’ve recently been promoted at work. The position that I landed wasn’t posted, and no one else was given the opportunity to apply for it. I reached out to the department heads to inquire about any possible openings, set up a meeting with the department heads, gave a presentation, and a few days later was offered the position after one of the department heads resigned and there was an immediate opening.
I’m over the moon about it and can’t wait to start. However, my coworkers are pretty upset about it. I get it; they don’t know all the work I put in and think that this position was just “given” to me, but they are going out of their way to let me know just how upset they are about it. Is there a classy way to tell them to quit ruining this moment for me? I wrote a post for my blog about it…but I’m afraid to post it, because I’m worried about the backlash I might receive from anyone in the new position. How can I make my co-workers realize that I was not given this position…I worked crazy hard for it, while not burning any bridges?
Well, first, it doesn’t matter how much behind-the-scenes work you put in. Even if you didn’t, it would have been perfectly feasible for your managers to decide you had earned the position through your work and qualifications and offered it to without all those preliminaries. Your coworkers are out of line in complaining to you — and if you’re going to be supervising any of them, prepare now for how you’re going to make it clear that those types of comments aren’t okay. Otherwise, though, just be calm, pleasant, and professional: “I worked hard to get this promotion, and I’m excited that it’s being recognized.” That’s it — you don’t need to explain or defend yourself. But you also can’t demand that they “not ruin the moment for you” — that’s not really the point here.
And do not write a blog post about it. That’s passive-aggressive. (In fact, if you’re going to be managing people, eliminate all such tendencies now. You’ll need to be direct and straightforward, and not take things personally.)
4. My boss keeps missing our staff meetings
My boss hasn’t attended our last 7 staff meetings (now held about every 6 weeks, reduced in frequency from monthly) — she has something else arranged or is on holiday or whatever. I think this is very strange, not to mention rather rude given that she decided we should meet monthly, then less frequently, and she sets the dates (about 12 months in advance). Is it odd or is it just me?
I’m not sure; it depends on what the purpose of the meetings is. If it’s to update each other on what you’re working on so everyone’s in the loop, she may not need to be there, since she probably is in the loop already from her individual work with each of you. If it’s to do project planning or something like that, it’s possible she doesn’t need to be involved. That said, why not say something like, “Do you want us to continue having these meetings without you, or should we reschedule when you’re unable to attend?”
I’d be much more concerned about her repeatedly missing one-on-one check-ins with people; those tend to accomplish a lot more.
5. My boss keeps promising me things that he never delivers
I was hired in a continuous improvement type of role, as an engineer. When I got the job, I was so excited since it appeared to be my dream job. However, due to the poor economy, many of our raw material suppliers have cut off their supply to our company and I am not doing work I was hired for.
I have expressed to my boss that I am not utilizing my talents, and while he recognizes this, he says that business needs come first, which I completely understand. So here’s the problem. He has promised many things to me — training, conferences, etc. — that he never delivers on. I was to go to a conference this year, but instead he and his boss went. He told me they wanted to send me to training but there was no money in the budget for it. Lately, he involved me in an all-day meeting with another division for a project that would utilize my skills, I brought a lot to the table but I was not invited to subsequent meetings and now he says he can run the project himself.
I find him dangling a carrot in front of me constantly, only to renege on his offer, saying he will do the opportunity (training, run a project, etc.) himself. He tells me that I am a highly valued and respected employee, but I am getting tired of him saying things and not delivering on them. I recently came up with a cost-cutting idea that could save the company quite a bit of money. My boss turned around and told me what a great idea it was and “I gave the project to Bud.” I don’t feel as if I have the energy to have another heart-to-heart talk with him since I don’t want to come off as complaining, but does it seem to you like this guy has a hidden agenda or a tad bit of a narcissistic side?
I have no idea if he has a hidden agenda or a narcissistic side, but I do know that he’s sending you very clear signals that you’re not going to get what you’re asking for any time soon. Stop believing what he’s saying to you — believe what his actions are telling you. And his actions are saying that this stuff just isn’t going to happen. So knowing that, what do you want to do?
6. Employer hasn’t checked my references after saying they would
After a second interview, I was told a reference check would be conducted the following week. It’s been nearly two weeks and I have heard nothing. I asked around to my references and they confirmed that no one had contacted them. My previous employer has not been contacted either! Is it safe to assume that I did not get the job? I am a recent college graduate, so I am thinking that maybe they thought I was too young and just didn’t want to tell me. This entire process has left me feeling very frustrated and dejected.
Ugh, I’m sorry. The frustrating answer is that there’s no way to know what it means. It might mean that they chose a different candidate instead and haven’t bothered to tell you. Or it might mean that you’re still in the running but things are moving much slower than they anticipated (a decision-maker or reference-checker is out of town, or busy with higher priorities, or they need to rethink some aspect of the position before they move forward, or someone just quit and they’re dealing with that vacancy first, or whatever). There’s no way to know, unfortunately.
However, you can absolutely email your contact there and say that you remain very interested in the position and wonder if they can update you on their timeline. That may or may not get you a response, but there’s a decent chance that it will. Good luck!
7. Managing a teenage stepson
I don’t know if you’ll be horrified or pleased to hear this, but I wanted to tell you a story. I recently moved in with my beloved, who happens to be blessed with a 17-year-old son who is here summers and for a few weeks every winter. I have younger kids, who are girls, and have no idea really how to relate to a kid who I haven’t known long enough to be in a parental role. My fiance’s been trying to get his son to do yard work for the last 3 summers straight for at least a little bit each day, but I doubt he spent three hours out there in the last three years. The son is a good kid, but would prefer to watch Doctor Who reruns on Netflix 18 hours a day, if left to his own devices. I don’t blame him, I could probably do the same if I didn’t have to work and parent and live in a clean house. But anyway.
I realized that A: the kid needed to do something productive. B: Nagging never works on anyone. C: A managerial role was probably something he would respect, much more than a substitute parent. So I’m using your principles, and getting results. Each day, we cover the (attainable) goals for the day. I’m holding him accountable to them — he gets rewards (dollars, plus extra TV time) if they’re completed. He has well-known consequences (I change the wifi password) if they’re not. It’s only been three weeks, but after the first consequence, he started asking me for his goals for the day as soon as he’s up, gets his work completed, and is free to watch The Doctor and his hijinks for the rest of the day.
I don’t know if that means your next foray should be a parenting (or a step-parenting) manual, but it seems to be working really well, and I thought you might like to know. :)
Ha! I suspect that your success here has a lot to do with your own skills at presenting this plan to him.
Also, this is pretty funny, considering my roots as an obstinate teenager who could not be cajoled into doing chores.