With Glen now gone, Zoe clearly couldn’t sleep and was up to answer the early morning call, when she was told they were off to St Pancreas Station and to bring a passport and overnight bag. “Do you reckon we’re going away?” asked Leon with THE most stupid question of the series so far. It must have been early because they couldn’t even load the car without a suit case falling off the back of the car, narrowly missing Tom’s foot.
In the back of the car, they discussed who could speak French. Jim did his best Del Boy impression of ‘petit pois’, whilst Melody proclaimed to be able to speak 6 languages because of her UN involvement and let’s not forget, from running a ‘global business’.
At the station, Sir Alan had already set up one major appointment for them with a leading home retailer and gave them a stern warning that they had to know their market.
The Teams/Team Leaders
Sir Alan elected Tom to be team leader of Logic and Helen had to move over to Venture.
Team Venture had to choose a Project Manager and Susan stepped up even though she openly admitted she knew no French and didn’t know anything about the French.
The Task
Everyone was given and order book and everyone was expected to sell something abroad because he doesn’t want HIS business restricted to trading just in the UK.
Half of the team stayed back in the UK to select British products to sell to the French, whilst the rest of them went off on their jolly, oops, I mean ‘serious’ business trip.
Melody and Leon and Helen and Jim headed out to France first and the rest of the candidates looked pretty fed up to be left behind to select two of 10 British designs, which were not currently available for sale in France, ranging from a toy worth €2 to a €1700 electric bike.
Susan wanted mass-market products, she wanted volume! Tom and Natasha liked the postcards, Natasha and Susan hated them with a passion and quickly moved on to a Spider grip. “That’s quite cool” said Susan but Zoe rightly questioned if anyone would pay €18 for it.
Next, a teapot light for 140 Euro and a booster seat for kids which folded up in to a backpack. Tom thought it was a great product with a massive market but the rest of the team were significantly less enamoured but not surprisingly, Tom failed to demonstrate his leadership competence.
Susan was sooooooo annoying “do the French go camping, do the French like children, do a lot of people drive in France” – ok, perhaps Leon’s question wasn’t the most stupid of the series then. Karren Brandy thought she was “beyond stupid”, I think I just might be inclined to agree, her naievety is beyond comprehension.
Susan relayed their findings to Jim and Helen, they liked the bean-bag-bed thingy and the booster seat so they decided to call up some companies en route to France to put in some ground work. The trouble was, Helen’s mind went blank and dynamite Jim had to come to the rescue, demonstrating he did know a bit more than ‘petit pois’ after all.
Tom and Natasha called up Melody, they liked a pop-up post card, a teapot light and the car seat ruck sack. Melody was so negative from the off, she was headstrong, she is headstrong, she will always be headstrong about what she does and doesnt like. Despite her opinons, Tom told her that she must do the relevant research and as such, it was somewhat half-hearted, that is one lady who doesn’t like being told what to do.
The designers then set out to demonstrate their products to the candidates. Tom didn’t look convinced that the teapot light could fetch 140 Euro and I was surprised the coffee machine that looked cool was rejected. Next there was the spider grip, which looked like a bunch of entwined pipe cleaners. ideal for holding smart phones in the car but Susan liked it and Zoe liked the margin… a business thought at last!
Tom also had a margins on the mind and opted for the pop-up, growing garden cards, which I wouldnt have touched with a very large barge pole as a business proposition. Nick’s screwed up nose should have said it all really, it wasn’t my cup of tea(pot) either and I grow my own veggies.
The kiddy seat had already sold 20k units and with 36 awards both teams wanted it, the battle commenced and Tom’s ‘Ive worked in the baby business’ card was shown.
1pm and the teams arrived in Paris. Tom wanted to know more about the pitch Sir Alan had arranged and if they would be likely to buy the car seat in any great number, or not. Melody didn’t care; she didn’t like it so they wouldn’t be having it.
Leon showed he’s not much of an artist and drew out a picture of the tea pot with the light inside, whilst Melody demonstrated she did actually have competence in French. Having accosted a young man by the escalator, Melody asked him about the light, he didn’t like it and he didn’t even think it was funny but he did like the car seat idea. Next she stopped a middle-aged lady who also thought the car seat was a good idea but Melody translated her positive response to be just ok. Naughty Melody! She then reported back to Tom and her bombastic nature made him question his choices and with three people preferring the teapot he was swayed by their opinions, rather than going with his own hunch for the car seat. A decision he would live to regret!
Jim booked an appointment straight away, his silky Irish cream charm was out again but Melody soon raced ahead and had 6 in the bag. There was no denying it, she was well and truly on a roll, that girl can sell. All Leon did was moan he couldn’t do anything as he didn’t speak French when in reality, he didnt really seem to try.
The rest of the team arrived to show off the products, Susan was so tiny she can fit in the car seat, I wish my bum was that small! I don’t think my bum was ever that small to be honest. Melody was in stitches when at long last she came face to face with the teapot light she was so keen to push Tom to choosing, it didnt ooze the quality and chic style expected. Clearly, the product was pants and she was now seemingly regretting lying through her teeth to Tom about the back pack.
8am the next day and Susan’s team had 4 appointments to sell to and were off in the car. Tom’s team were still faffing about, I mean in a meeting at the hotel, losing valuable selling time but to be fair, he was trying to make the playing field as fair as possible. Melody was not happy, she’d made the 6 appointments for the team but saw it as Tom taking the appointments away from her, I was half expecting a toddler foot-stamping session to errupt. “It’s a team game” reminded Tom but still he backed down when her size 6 killer heels and claws came out to trample all over him. She insisted she sell to all 6 of the pre-booked appointments and that the rest of the team could have any more she managed to make divvied up amongst them. Who was really the Project Manager? Perhaps Tom got a kick out of being dominated?
Jim was at his first appointment with the baby seat and spider grip in Maison de Ville. It flopped! Taking one look around the store should have been sufficient to fathom that that this shop didn’t stock those sorts of items.
Still on the road were Melody and Leon. “There’s so much traffic” wined Melody after wrongly having told Tom that everyone in Paris used the Metro. Clearly, they don’t. Eventually, they arrived at an off-beat design store, which already had a row of similar looking lights. “This product has a great potential, I love the classicness of it” said the buyer and immediately ordered 50 units for 3250 Euro. With a sale in the bag, Melody loved the teapot once more but not enought to have one in her house, I bet!
Tom headed off to La Redoute. Given Lord Sugar had set this appointment up should have told them it was going to be a biggy! La Redoute, surely they’d heard of them even if they couldn’t spell it! The pitcher was decided in the back of the car using the very well-know management technique; paper, scissors, stones!
Around the La Redoute table, Natasha presented the teapot lamp flashing her belly button in the process (ewwww!) until Tom messed up big style, starting off negotiations at 10 units. Yes, that was JUST 10 units, not even 10,000 units. Natasha recognised the faux pas and tried to rescue it by stating 50 units – still way too low! What part of this company are massive didn’t they get? Surely, the big and flashy building should have told them they are not a company who buy in sets of 10.
Jim and Zoe secured a small order of 100 spiders and no backpacks so Susan and Helen pitched to La Redoute. At least she knew who they were and had even ordered from their catalogue, stroking their egos in just the right places. Initially, they thought the price was high but Helen nailed it, she delivered a killer pich by stating just how unique it was and couldn’t stress the importance of supporting child safety products enough.
Tom and Natasha’s French was dire and I had to chuckle when Tom wished one potential client a happy holiday! Unsurprisingly, no appointments were secured with their pigeon French, my 13 yr old niece knows more French than them put together in a shop full of French dictionaries.
3pm and Susan gave the spider one last push and ended up getting the push from a completely unrelated shop. Jim meanwhile likened the selling process to pushing treacle uphill, it was clearly getting to the end of the day and everyone was beginning to flag and feel the pressure in equal measure.
Natasha managed to flog just over a thousand Euros of the horrid postcards to a man who was not impressed with the teapot light and shot her ‘concept’ down in flames. Personally, they were both products I wouldn’t have chosen, concept or no concept.
Susan spotted a phone shop from the back of the car, whilst it might have seemed like it was just a shop they had a massive online presence. Within minutes she had increased the initial order from 1000 to 1500 units for the spider grip and I was rather pleasantly surprised that she pulled it off, I wasn’t sure she had it in her.
With just 30 minutes to go, Susan’s team finally realised they had found their market,albeit too late in the day. Despite the time running out, their heels furiously clacked down the streets of Paris to try some last ditch sales attempts but it was too late as the next appointment would be with Sir Alan.
The Numbers
Susan’s Team Venture had the car seat rucksack and the spider grip, they sold:
La Redoute bought 214,000 Euro – a boardroom record
Smaller retailer sales totalled 14,699 Euro
Tom’s Team Logic had the teapot light and the growing postcards, they sold:
La Redoute bought absolutely zilch!
Smaller retailer sales totalled 11,705 Euro
The Outcome
Susan’s team were rewarded with flying lessons, which included flying these tiny planes and even learning to land them. Great Prize, which reminds me I must get hubby to book the flying lesson I bought him for his 40th.
Team Logic headed back to the familiar Bridge Cafe to mull it over… Melody should be fired for fibbing about the rucksack amongst other things but we all knew she would wheedle out of it and blame Tom for being the PM.
The Boardroom
Four nervous faces entered the boardroom and Tom tried to claw his way out of the La Redoute cock up, he showed just how little gusto he had when it came to leadership. Melody was asked specifically to research La Redoute but she failed to do it, Nick had it written in his notepad and specifically stated the time … why was she not in getting her ear bent? Firstly, she should have been for failing to follow instruction and secondly for trying to pull the wool over their eyes. Thirdly for… I could go on and on and on but what does my opinion count?
Leon got picked on next, it didn’t matter how many times he told Lord Sugar he didn’t speak French, and it was irrelevant as after the initial flourishes of French, Melody actually did most of the deals in the Queen’s English.
La Redoute buy things in their thousands, not drips and drabs! Melody showed her hunger, or should we have called it greed when Nick reminded her that she failed to share out the appointments she had made. Karen firmly told her that whilst Jim made their team’s appointments, he played fair. Melody didn’t show herself as being a team player this week; hopefully she had learnt her lesson.
Tom brought Leon and Melody back in to the boardroom. Woohoo! She was in the firing line at last, she pushed too far even though she did sell very well but Leon was akin to a wet, limp lettuce throughout the task.
Returning to the boardroom following the big cheese chat, the candidates faced Lord Sugar’s questioning. Melody’s accolades were covered and she tried to push her ‘global’ business ideas on him but was cut short. In actual fact, Melody’s pushiness was praised by Lord Sugar, which surprised me – it “showed aggression” and a “desire to win”. I wondered if he was looking at the same person we all were?
Leon didn’t get away with the ‘no-speaky-French’ card for long, Lord Sugar having worked with all manner of different countries over the years and not having learnt a word of their lingo. He had done very nicely thank you very much so it didn’t wash as an excuse.
Tom then grew some and piped up, he reeled off his business successes and claimed he was going to be bigger than Dyson, we wait with baited breath on that score. OMG! I’m going blue already!
Decision Time, Lord Sugar liked Melody’s hunger. “She is ruthless, she will walk over and tread over anyone, and she’ll eat them up and spit them out for her breakfast, that’s what I like about her really.” So, she was safe, leaving him with a dilemma…
Tom was kept on purely on gut instinct as he’d manufactured and sold products already so it was Leon who got the big finger waggled in his face and headed of for the taxi ride home.
FIRED: Leon
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