Cash Cows is a Virgin records compilation put out in 1980. Well, it says “Rock 81” on the cover, but the copyright date is 1980. Maybe it’s like how the 2015 model cars are already out. Anyway, compilations are always a little harder to review than albums, because they’re not cohesive but, let’s embrace these cash cows and see what they got!
The first song is “Respectable Street” by XTC. This song starts really quiet, so I turned it way up, but when the song started I nearly blew out my eardrums. I kind of like when that happens though, as long as you’re not wearing headphones. I like this guys singing voice, there’s something kind of playful about this song, but it’s also a little harder sounding. I like it, I think I’d check out this album after hearing this song. Spoiler Alert: Alex says he thinks he has this album. What is life going to be like when I’m in the “X’s”?? Will we ever know?
The next song is super weird and definitely from the future it’s called “The Black Hit of Space,” by the Human League. It’s got a real attitude about it. The lyrics almost sound like slow rapping at times, and they’re just really having a fun time with all the spaced out intergalactical synthesizers sounds that they can make. Like I feel like they must have been really excited by the the sound of this song. Alex just said, “Can you imagine a major record label putting something like this out now?” Um, no. Never.
The next song “Sheba” by Mike Oldfield is in a language I don’t know. It might be Japanese. Alex just looked it up. They’re just vocalizations, not in any language. It has a very magical and slightly cheesy feel to it. But you want to embrace this song. You want to skip or do Prancercise to it
Also, don’t think I didn’t notice that Captain Beefheart is on this compilation. It’s the first thing I noticed. At least it isn’t a song from Trout Mask Replica.
I’m liking this punk song by The Ruts who Alex has never heard of, and I haven’t either (duh) It’s called “West One (Shine On Me)” Although I liked it more in the beginning, it kind of loses it’s soul halfway through and then all the sudden a super cheesy saxophone really ruins the whole thing! So I take it back, no thanks, The Ruts. That’s the thing with compilations, I feel like they can mess with you sometimes.
The last song on side one by The Skids, has a unique sound to it that I’m liking. It’s really slow at point but then build into something great. I mean, a song that know how to build can really make you feel so good. LIke it can make your heart beat faster in anticipation, that’s a great feeling. This song is called “Arena.”
On to side two! The first song is called Permafrost from the band Magazine. I was kind of zoning out with no opinion but then he said “I will drug you and fuck you,” and I looked at Alex and he was all ewwww and I was like uh-huh. Alex said he likes this song other than the drug you and fuck you line, that it has a “sludgy synth,” but I was not feeling it.
The next song is “Hands To Take,” by the Flying Lizards. I’m super into the singer. So far I like this song. I’m pretty sure the only other song I know by this band is “Money.” And I know that song from the Empire Records Soundtrack. Yeah, this song is good. It has a little bit of a Brian Eno feel to it. A little “Baby’s On Fire.”
Oh look who it is. The next song started and my eyes went wide and I immediately picked up the cover to see who it was, I bet you can guess! Alex was all, “did you miss him?” With a satisfying grin on his face. I will say this, at least Captain Beefheart gets a reaction out of me. It a way better feeling than feeling bored about a song. This song is called “Dirty Blue Gene,” and is from an album Alex doesn’t own so I’ve never heard it before, lucky me! Actually though, I’m kind of into the guitar. I’m kind of liking it a bit. The mayhem is somehow working. My relationship with Captain Beefheart is so love/hate!
Ugh the next song is like some AC/DC crap, I definitely like the Beefheart song better. Way better. This song is called “Are You Sure,” by Gillan. Oh my god the cheesiness is making me roll my eyes so hard right now.
Following the AC/DC crap is a Bob Seger sounding guy named Kevin Coyne. First of all, it really does not follow that last song well at all. And it kind of sticks out on the whole album, it feels like they just didn’t know what to do with this guy so they threw him on this compilation. I wonder if compilations were a legitimate way for people to discover music in the 80s? This song just does not belong here! It’s called “Taking On the World.”
The last song is “Attack,” by Public Image Limited, which Alex just told me was Johnny Rotten’s band after the Sex Pistols. I’m into it. It’s raw and genuine feeling a good way to end this pretty blah album.
And that’s it! Even though there were a few songs I liked on this compilation, I really don’t think I’m ever going to put it on again. Alex says he liked it A LOT and would definitely play it again, but I seriously doubt that ever happening. I’m officially calling it a dud.